Dumbest Things Heard In School

[LooK iTz Jinjo]

When my physics teacher, announced to the class that global warming was a myth and that "God would never let such a thing happen." -_-

 

[brumby]

for year 12 english, we were all reading a book called "the rusty bugle".

The teacher pronounced bugle, bug-el. She had no idea what a bugle was.

 

[LooK iTz Jinjo]

In my music class last year, we got this little gem:

"Who's John Lennon?"

There was also the incident of the list of countries involved in WW2 that didn't have Poland on it. I have yet to forgive my History teacher for that.

I would hardly rate not knowing who John Lennon is as a bad thing, just maybe unfamiliar with dead celebrities. If said person was a Beatles fan though...

Every time a person tells me they don't know who John Lennon is I just stare at them blankly for a few minutes before calling them retarded. He is one of the greatest men to ever have lived

 

[Toasty]

I recall one person in Government class saying, in all seriousness, "I think President Bush is doing a good job." The year was 2006.

Iused to go to a small catholic school and was one of 2 students in the school that I knew of that didnt think Bush was great(even all the teachers thought he was fine(just because his party supposedly was against gay marriage and against abortion. (Im catholic but the realistic and lazy type, not the crazy or non thinking type)
Before the end of the year my friend joseph who was the only other person who didnt support Bush was expelled and I left the country for the UK.

 

[Dreyfuss]

Nothing sticks out in my mind, which shows that MY SCHOOL IS BETTER THAN ALL OF YOURS.

...I am lucky to be at a very good public school with excellent teachers and high standards.

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school...

Well, nothing is truly stupid, or dumb for that matter, its usually just misunderstanding or someone who simply misheard....

If you don't know any idiots, it's because you're the most idiotic person in the group.

Meh, everyone's entitled to their own opinions.

I recall one person in Government class saying, in all seriousness, "I think President Bush is doing a good job." The year was 2006.

That's an opinion, not a fact.

It actually shines worse on you than them to be so narrow-minded.

?Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought.? John. F. Kennedy

I would love to know how he justified that.

Pretty much anytime anyone uses the term "critical thinking". That phrase is just a pile of bullshit someone came up with because they wanted "thinking" to sound more intense.

critical, definition 3c: exercising or involving careful judgment or judicious evaluation

There is nothing wrong with the term critical thinking.

The greatest lie Satan has ever told is, "The Devil does not exist."

...etc etc

Devil has been busy.

So do you guys ever notice how ironic it is that you're willing to believe one party is lying based solely on the testimony of another party?

"Xbox 360 programs it's own game so it is way better than PC"
I told him to bring prove to back up that statement.
It has been 1.5 years since the day he said that statement and no prove!

Proof...

Anyway, with that out of the way:

There's this guy that looks like he's in his early 30s in my college English class. This is basic English 1A mind you, it's my first semester, but still... We had to write a response to this chapter we read where this woman is relating the story of some other woman being raped, and she calls him some nasty stuff, so in his article this guy tries to make some kind of point by calling him a jerk. Nobody would've even known but he's the type that can't shut his goddamn mouth and complains about the low score he got, to which the teacher replies that name-calling isn't how a professional writer conducts themselves on this kind of assignment. So he tries to argue that the author did it, but the author isn't writing a critique, it's a half-fiction based on her own life, so she can get away with that.

So he says, and I quote: "But it felt good."

He should get a good score because he felt good writing it...

And it's not over yet. The teacher tells him pretty much exactly what I was thinking (and muttered without any hesitation loud enough for anyone to hear but not directed at him), that just because something feels good for the writer doesn't make it good for the reader.

And I quote once again: "My mom's not going to be happy with this."

Let me remind you again, this guy is at least 10 years older than most of the class.

 

[Hafnium]

"Trains don't run on electricity, they run on tracks" - said by a not so bright girl.

Followed by the whole class laughing.

 

[Lydius_Winters]

Well i have heard the:
Teacher: I am no longer going to borro ANYONE a pencil. If you dont have one tough shit.
Student: *puts hit hand up a minute later* teacher can i borrow a pencil.

And this happened about once a week and we were about 17.

 

[JJDWilson]

I recall a girl in 5th grade who didn't know whether the US or England won the Revolutionary War.

Well to be honest not that many people do. The English did.

They only became Americans AFTER the war and signing of independence.

 

[damselgaming]

School A:
On a trip to the London Dungeons in Year 11, we are in a coach driving past Westminster Abbey. The coach driver says "This is Westminster Abbey", to which a boy shouts out, "Oh yeah blud! That's well where the Queen lives!"

School B (the rival of School A):
I moved to this school for 6th Form and was on a coach with the Drama students going to see a play in London, we drive past Westminster Abbey when the coach driver says, "That is Westminster Abbey, a year ago I was driving a group of history students from School A to the London Dungeons when one of the idots says 'Oh yeah blud! that's well where the queen lives!'"
Laughter insued as did embarrassment.

 

[RufusMcLaser]

I spent many years in a Southern Baptist private school. I don't know where to begin.

 

[WeedWorm]

The teacher had stepped out of the class for a couple of minutes. The secretary (for some reason) was left to watch us. A student raises his hand and asks to go to the toilet. Secretary replies,"No. K-N-E-O, no."

 

[axelspitfire]

I was in geography when the girl infront of me truned round and asked:
"How do you spell 'MEDC' ?"
i burst out laughing, my friend next to me laughed too.
she stared blankly for a few seconds and turned around telling us to fuck off.
The teacher asked why we were laughing so i saved the girl her dignity and said a picture in the book was funny.
this was year 10.

 

[Valkraye]

One of my favourite;

Teacher "So who is your mother?"
Student "Well...(thinks for quite a while)...She's um a person"
(after a little pause)
Teacher "Is that all?"
Student (confidently) "Yep".

The student later fell off her chair for no apparent reason.

 

[UpcountryGecko]

I remember once walking over to my South African friend to hear the person he was talking to say

"What do you mean you can't speak African?"

The sad thing about this was that all of us were 16 and at a Grammar school which is where the supposed smartest people in the age group and area go.

 

[Matsu]

Once I burned a copy of Ethan Frome that I was forced to buy for a high-school English class after I found out I couldn't get my money back. I hated every fucking thing about that story, and still do. It wasn't a book-burning pile or anything, and I didn't do it at school, I just took it out behind my house and put the matches to it.

I was telling my friend about it, and one of the other English teachers overheard me, and asked me why I would do such a horrible thing. I told him it was because I was forced to buy a shitty book, because no idiot that has ever attempted going downhill on anything that wasn't covered in spikes or wired to explode would ever think that it's a reliable way to kill yourself, and because I will never have the eight dollars or the three weeks I wasted on that garbage. Specifically I said, "I could have probably bought a blunt off the janitor and spent less money and killed fewer brain cells."

He looked like he was about to cry. Then he said I was a communist, and didn't appreciate being an American.

 

[Julianking93]

Any time some stupid ***** would say "OMG" or "LOL" would just make me want to shoot someone.

EDIT: To be specific;

Me:*notices girl next to me is drawing "" instead of an actual smiley face* Why do you draw those emoticons instead of an actual face?

Girl: IDK, they're just cuter that way!! LOL!

She actually said that.

 

[Julianking93]

science teacher: "therefor the farther you are away from the earth the less its gravity effects you. so where on earth would you weigh the least?"
me: "on top of Mt. everest"
random girl: "how the hell would you get on top of Mt. everest?"
me: "you'd climb it"
random girl: "you can climb Mt. everest?"
this happened my freshmen year of high school

same girl: "hey luke look at these pictures on my phone"
me: "its a ground hog; why do you have a ground hog"
girl: "I found this baby ground hog last night it fell out of its nest"
happened junior year

next one happened yesterday

same girl: "Luke i just failed a test I don't know what to do. Im never going to get into colage. what should I do?"
me: "well, you could sell your body"
her: "very funny luke what would I do if I was just a head"
(don't feel bad she's EXTREMELY rich)

she also thought Romania is in Hawaii, the sun and the moon were inside the earths atmosphere, the sun was smaller than the earth, and thought that dragons were real. (she is not mentally challenged, just a bimbo)

This is worthy of the biggest face palm in history. How can someone be that fucking retarded?

 

[MercurySteam]

We call my auto techer Mr Harmer, Harmfag just because he lets us.

 

[Manhattan2112]

"Austin, are you raising your hand?"
"No... I raise my hand down for... extra... no..."