Dumbest Things Heard In School

[megatron2.0]

In history class we were watching Band of Brothers

Woah, you watched Band of Brothers?

Can I join your school?

you lucky lucky man.....

it has to be this

teacher: whats 7 times 2 jason?

jason: 64!

 

[Ultress]

I'm not trying to sound like a pompus ass but this girl gave a presentation on a Clockwork Orange, and described it as "The goverment did some mean things and and they felt bad so they made up to Alex(I think that's his name).

When asked a question about Harrit Bechum( can't remember thename of the person), A girl replyed that she was a women.

 

[zerzxes]

Teacher:*talks about subject* ahemm camilla are you keeping track?
Camilla:*turns around after sitting the complete other way* yes of course!... what class are we having?
teacher:english!
Camillah..
teacher: now open you book on page 51(thats a random number, I can't remeber!)
Camilla: I have to get my book from the locker

this was halfway trough class. similar to this has happend several times too!

EDIT: like 70% of my shcool thinks im emo because i wear black and listen to heavy metal... When did heavy metal = emo?
I counter this by listening to my favorite music loud on a speaker for my ipod and make sure they get pissed.... what? it's fun!

 

[seanmcdow]

the whole pluto not being a real planet thing

 

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

During disection in Science class, one student shouts out "My fish doesn't have any lungs!"

 

[paragon1]

I recall one person in Government class saying, in all seriousness, "I think President Bush is doing a good job." The year was 2006.

That's an opinion, not a fact.

It actually shines worse on you than them to be so narrow-minded.

Yes it is an opinion.
Here's some other opinions for you:
The Nazis had the right idea.
Stalin wasn't such a bad guy.
Robert Mugabe is a decent human being.

See what I'm getting at?

And I'd appreciate it if you didn't insult me based on two sentences.

 

[phildo99]

In 1st year secondary, as a joke after a string of dumb answers by a pupil, one of my teachers asked them to point to the country Wales on a detailed map of the UK...they pointed to the Isle of Aaran...on the west coast of Scotland

 

[Noremacv]

probably when one of my dumb blonde classmates asked our teacher if she (the teacher) believes in beastiality

 

[Shaoken]

Then it's bad. But if somebody doesn't know why, it's still acceptable for them to ask so that they can be educated as such.

tl;dr you missed the point, it's still a completely valid question.

tl;dr You're completely right. My bad.

Still, I'm sick of all these internet kids going on about how great communism and how we've all been taught lies about it. And it's apparantly not going to go away any time soon...

 

[CaptainCrunch]

Biology Teacher: "Semen is composed of more than just sperm, there's also sugars like glucose to help keep the sperm alive longer..."



Hot Girl: "Then why does it taste so salty?"

 

[Iron Mal]

I remember the first day of doing latin at GCSE, to get some background knowledge on the sort of culture that used the language (that being the Romans) we looked at some of their history (fair enough in my opinion).

About half an hour into the 'history' lesson and one of the girls in our class asked the teacher 'what language did the Romans speak?' (something you'd figure that someone who chose to study Latin would have at least some knowledge of).

Other one liners being:

'Excuse me Miss [teacher's name removed], could I please have my knife back?'

'The reason I can't hand in my coursework is because it got soaked when I went swimming'

'I'm an anti-coprperate activist so [brief pause] I don't really want to do the work' (I actually said this one to get out of doing 'business' work in an art lesson, they actually believed me as well, I should point out now that I am not an activist of any kind)

'Religious reasons' (An excuse from yours truely to get out of homework, yet again it was suprisingly effective)

'Child abuse!' (Someone in my class screamed this over and over again when a teacher gave them a detention)

'Now who here was enough of a [pause before spitting out the next word with a hint of rightious anger] goon to steal [student name removed]'s pencil case? I'll keep you here all day if I have to!'

 

[elbryan108]

I attend a small college here in Ky and to be honest it's where instructors who couldn't hack it elsewhere go to teach. Lat week I had a Desktop publishing class. This was the first class of the term, so the instructor was going over the syllabus and rules and what not. Suddenly he said this, unprovoked,:

"The way Obama is handling Gitmo makes me sick. These prisoners weren't in uniform when they were captured. The rules of the Geneva Convention do not apply to them. They are the scum of the earth. They deserve whatever treatment they get."

Dude actually said that. I'm torn between being horrified and desperately trying to work out what the hell any of that has to do with Desktop Publishing.

 

[Kabutos]

'Child abuse!' (Someone in my class screamed this over and over again when a teacher gave them a detention)

I just spit out the Coke I was drinking onto my keyboard.

That reminds me of my friend, who will yell out "Help me! I'm being Raped!", or simply "Rape! Rape!" whenever someone touches him. (Any touch, like brushing up against him.)

 

[Assassin Xaero]

College CIS101 Class...
- ROM = Right On Memory
- Firewalls make you invisible to hackers
- You cannot open a MS Office 2007 Word file on an older version of office

Teachers here are stupid...

 

[Deleted]

I've never been witness to any stupidity of a mentionable nature at my school, but:

"What's so bad about communism?"

*Epic face palm*

The first two are beyond retarded; would you care to explain this one?

I suppose this one is a little ambiguous.

One must only look at history to see that Communism doesn't work. Sure it looks good on paper but it just doesn't work in practice.

You can't pay a doctor the same thing as a guy sweeping the gravel off of train tracks and expect results.

Yet we can pay actors more than we pay teachers. Communism would work of those damn people would do as they're told!

It goes beyond this. Corruption and greed are also an inescapable part of human nature. These two factors absolutely wreak havoc on a society that is supposed to be classless and those in power are in a position to take what they want.

Then in that case I agree with you.

 

[Deleted]

"How do I calculate the mass of a polyatomic ion like Nitrite combined with Pb(lead) wien the charge is supposed to be -1?"

Fucking idiots, the lot of them |

Add them, +2 to the total. (Guessing)

Correct

 

[mswar11]

This is pathetic...

Chemistry Class. My teacher has a flash program simulating how molecules move in different temperatures.

Girl: Woah, how are you doing this. I didnt know we could look down onto molecules.
Teacher: I'm not
Girl: So whose doing these expierement? Korea, China, Japan?
Teacher: We're doing now
Girl: So America....

*Face Palm*

 

[Lord Mountbatten Reborn]

"Video games aren't for having fun!" He then went on a short rant about how it's all about getting points, be they achievement points or XP.

Perhaps this is a violent sentiment, but he should be killed. I hate people like that.

On-topic, I once asked my brother where Canada was on the map. He responded with "er... east."

Whenever someone is unforgivably stupid I bang my head against the nearest wall. This happens too much, and is bad for me.