Dumbest Things Heard In School

[Nickolai77]

Not strictly from school, but it's from my ex-

me- I study english lit, psychology, history and philosophy
her- philosophy? Is'nt that something to do with stones?

 

[JoshGod]

i didn hear these but i was told about them.
in a first year a level history class a boy retook the year so he already did the first year and the teacher said 'what cant you tell me about the cold war' to which he replied
'it was fought in winter'.... you can see why hes retaking the year
my english teacher told me that a previous year 10 or 11 in a gcse coursework essay on the poem of rudyard kipling (hyeanas) started his essay with... 'mr kipling sells cakes'... i think the whole class facepalmed.

i did hear this one
teacher:what does fallow taste of
student: chicken!!
teacher:no fallow is nothing (on a crop rotation its one of 4 fields to allow the soil to get back all its nutrients etc without plants using it so crown crops always have nutrients)

 

[Godavari]

I said to one of my mates, do you know where the KFC chicken was invented? (or made, whatever). He said No, i honestly dont know, I said do you know what KFC stands for? he said yeh, Kentucky Fried Chicken.
Facepalm ensued.

This post is really old, but I feel the need to reply to it.
What if I asked where french fries were first made? If you say France, you'd be wrong. It was Belgium. Your friend was probably suspicious of a misnomer.

 

[Optimus Hagrid]

"There are no volcanoes in the upper hemishpere because all the lava flows to the bottom"

 

[G1eet]

During American Lit Honors:

"Twilight is a legitimate piece of literature."

During Global History 9:

"Where's India?"

"Mesopotamia is Iraq?!"

"Saudi Arabia is a peninsula?!!?"

All by the same half-retarded schoolgirl that somehow found her way into the honors level course.

During U.S. History, my teacher said:

"America is the greatest country in the world."

We also have a Russian student in our class. I think he also lol'd at my teacher's egocentrism. The rest of the students were superseniors or other kids that had failed it before and didn't want to be there.

Addendum:

In Earth Science Honors:

"So in the Western Hemisphere, the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, but in the Eastern Hemisphere, it rises in the west and sets in the east?"

 

[SomethingUnrelated]

All of the following are by the same girl.

"What's a skyscraper?"

"What film is this?" (Moments after she had read the title off the screen)

"Sweet Home Barack Obama!"

"Barcelona isn't a country?!"

 

[darkless]

A girl in my class today asked if Napoleon was a midget.
When asked, she said that he lived in Spain, and that he had a high voice.

Didn't he have that whole "midget" thing thrust upon him by lieu of being badmouthed by his enemies?
I recall reading something that was roughly of that nature.

I think it was more so that his body guards where just freaking tall, or something.

no he was 5 feet 2 inches

no he was 5 foot 7 the unit of measurement was different back then i already posted a link about it.

 

[CartoonHead]

Off the top of my head it would have to be the rumour that the definition of the (offensive) word 'Twat' was: 'A pregnant goldfish'. Seriously.

Also my Year 7 Teacher told us during a History class that they didn't use gas in WW1. I informed her that she was incorrect, but she was adamant about this.
I told my parents and she ended up getting fired. (My family and I believe history is very important, lest we forget).

 

[shwnbob]

The best was when we were looking at globes in History class and this girl raises her hand and says "I can't find Texas" I had to bite my hand to stop myself from laughing.

 

[Nickolai77]

Not strictly from school, but it's from my ex-

me- I study english lit, psychology, history and philosophy
her- philosophy? Is'nt that something to do with stones?

I hope i dont offend with a question on why did you go out with someone like that?

...I often ask myself that question lol- all i'm going to say is beggars carn't be choosers.

 

[darthsquizzo]

Not strictly from school, but it's from my ex-

me- I study english lit, psychology, history and philosophy
her- philosophy? Is'nt that something to do with stones?

I feel inclined to make a contribution there. In philosophy there is a theory called The Paradox of the Stone. Google it, it's quite interesting.
Maybe she wasn't quite as ditzy as she seemed?

 

[The_Chief]

I will be coming back to this thread everyday...because moonie is an extreme idiot.

Mr.C: Ok children where was george washington from?

Moonie screams out:JAPAN!

Me: *facepalm*

 

[Cody211282]

"Communism just hasn't been done right"-college teacher
"The USSR under Stalin and Lenin was a great place for the average man to live"-same guy
and this was on 9/11 after the second plane hit "It's the Germans, they are starting WW3, this is the same thing they did to our ships during WW2 in Pearl Harbor"- kid in history class

 

[Ren3004]

Got another one. My Philosophy teacher once gave us a kind of a test that included two painting and asked the title of the painting and the name of the painter. A girl in my class answered, respectively, 'Mona Lisa' and 'Leonardo DiCaprio'

 

[vietfighter]

I've lost count (and memory!) as to how many times I hear misinformation. But the best was the time one of my friends wrote 42 for all the answers to an Algebra test. All. i.e "Simplify 2X + 3Y = 64" "42"

When questioned, he claimed it was "the answer to everything." He failed the class.

Hitch hikers guide to the galexy?

yep. but unfortuately it didn't work...

 

[vietfighter]

I've lost count (and memory!) as to how many times I hear misinformation. But the best was the time one of my friends wrote 42 for all the answers to an Algebra test. All. i.e "Simplify 2X + 3Y = 64" "42"

When questioned, he claimed it was "the answer to everything." He failed the class.

If I ever meet that guy i'll buy him a pan galactic gargle blaster. Or maybe just a beer. I wish I had the balls to do that.

He later made 7 of our teachers retire due to his antics. he's been suspended, but not expelled.

 

[andrat]

Hmmm
"No! Canada is part of Asia!"

"I thought Buffalo Wings really came from Buffalo"

"Wait wait wait... I could have swore cows and horses laid eggs"

Edit! A buddy of mine answered Chuck Norris to every answer on a test.