Embarrassing sex-related stories

[EeveeElectro]

I feel a bit sicky admitting this, but I've had condoms come off inside me... e_e

That's about it for embarrassing stories. The last few times have been very good ;u;

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

I feel a bit sicky admitting this, but I've had condoms come off inside me... e_e

Oh, that scarred me so much the first time it happened! The guy I was with had already finished in the condom, but we didn't part immediately (it was nice feeling him there) and when we finally did, there was no condom. Finding the damn thing wasn't fun, and I was a week late that month, so for a while there I was panicking cause I thought I was pregnant.

So yeah... right there with you.

 

[EeveeElectro]

I feel a bit sicky admitting this, but I've had condoms come off inside me... e_e

Oh, that scarred me so much the first time it happened! The guy I was with had already finished in the condom, but we didn't part immediately (it was nice feeling him there) and when we finally did, there was no condom. Finding the damn thing wasn't fun, and I was a week late that month, so for a while there I was panicking cause I thought I was pregnant.

So yeah... right there with you.

I was panicking like mad D: I was like Oh god it's gonna be stuck there forever and I'm gonna get all sorts of infections and the hospital are gonna have to pull it out. LOL. My boyfriend at the time pushed it in further trying to get it out too which made me panic more and cry >._<

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

I don't know how we came to this idea, and why I actually did it, but we hid behind a bush not so far from her home, and we tried to have sex. And the worst part was: We didn't know what to do, so it was sloppy at best...

Sorry to hear that. Behind a bush sounds... scratchy.

I, fortunately, had my first time with an experienced lesbian. She taught me a lot. Even if she did taste like tobacco and make me watch Grease 2. **shudders**

She was the only smoker I ever dated seriously, but for years afterwards the smell of tobacco would always make me nostalgic and slightly aroused.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

I was panicking like mad D: I was like Oh god it's gonna be stuck there forever and I'm gonna get all sorts of infections and the hospital are gonna have to pull it out. LOL. My boyfriend at the time pushed it in further trying to get it out too which made me panic more and cry >._<

Did it slip off during or right after? Because I've only had it happen afterwards.

When I'm with a guy, I usually have him use a condom. However, I usually make the guy in question pull out immediately after he finishes so that the condom doesn't fall off.

See, this is one reason I like sleeping with women - no condom scares.

 

[EeveeElectro]

I was panicking like mad D: I was like Oh god it's gonna be stuck there forever and I'm gonna get all sorts of infections and the hospital are gonna have to pull it out. LOL. My boyfriend at the time pushed it in further trying to get it out too which made me panic more and cry >._<

Did it slip off during or right after? Because I've only had it happen afterwards.

When I'm with a guy, I usually have him use a condom. However, I usually make the guy in question pull out immediately after he finishes so that the condom doesn't fall off.

See, this is one reason I like sleeping with women - no condom scares.

I think during... He said it felt a bit weird and told me to get off, and there was no condom there >w<;

Haha, I should try a lady or two sober this time then, LOL.

 

[rayen020]

Not much of anything really i was just smashed as hell f-in my GF, whenn all of a sudden i stopped. She asked "what the hell? why did you stop?" i then proceeded to rip a twenty second fart, and then pass out with my dick still inside her.
We just celebrated our first wedding anniversary.

Then there the one with my dumbass sister and her dumbass boyfriend...
basically they were at third and realized that they didn't have any comdoms. So they somehow came to the conclusion the next best thing would be a plastic grovery bag. They had no lube though. Anyway apparently my dad got home early and heard a bunch o shuffling from my ister room and opened the door thinking it was the cats... he is greeted my sister wearing only a long T-shirt and her boyfriend with no shirt and a grocery bag hanging halfway out of his pants...

 

[Fappy]

I was panicking like mad D: I was like Oh god it's gonna be stuck there forever and I'm gonna get all sorts of infections and the hospital are gonna have to pull it out. LOL. My boyfriend at the time pushed it in further trying to get it out too which made me panic more and cry >._<

Did it slip off during or right after? Because I've only had it happen afterwards.

When I'm with a guy, I usually have him use a condom. However, I usually make the guy in question pull out immediately after he finishes so that the condom doesn't fall off.

See, this is one reason I like sleeping with women - no condom scares.

I think during... He said it felt a bit weird and told me to get off, and there was no condom there >w<;

Haha, I should try a lady or two sober this time then, LOL.

This exchange has made the whole thread worth it.

Where'd my popcorn go?

 

[HouseOfSyn]

just heard a friend complain that when she had sex with a guy last night, that was so drunk he drew a line with his sperm on his forehead and whispered "simba!".

thought i'd share. xD

That is a very 'famous' story off TextsFromLastNight.com. Good steal.

 

[Owen Majkowski]

Oh! just remembered two more.
1. not as interesting, wacking myself and it ended up flying into my mouth. that was weird.
2. Me and a friend at were playing pool, and my genius idea was to make a bet. If I won, she'd have to give me a blowjob, and if I lost, then I would keep myself shaved for 2 months.

I lost. So she made me do the first shave right there and she was watching me the whole time with little tips like "Don't cut yourself!" or telling me I missed a spot.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Haha, I should try a lady or two sober this time then, LOL.

Sober is usually the way to go when you're trying something new. Although I know that some people need to be a bit drunk before they try new things - I've never really understood why, but then I love trying new things.

Also, I suddenly have "Sober" by P!nk stuck in my head.

This exchange has made the whole thread worth it.
Where'd my popcorn go?

Um, thanks?

I'm not sure what's so entertaining about lost condoms. I was sympathizing, since there was nothing funny (or particularly embarrassing) about such unpleasant events.

... or did you mean the bit where I suggested that lesbianism is an effective solution to the problem?

 

[Fappy]

... or did you mean the bit where I suggested that lesbianism is an effective solution to the problem?

You got it, at least that's the part that made me giggle anyway.

I can sympathize as I have had similar issues with condoms in the past. Being the guy in the encounter is quite horrifying as well considering its hard not to think its somehow your fault. I have had my fair share of freak outs and hate condoms for it. Broken more often than lost D:

Me and my current girlfriend are on our 4th form of birth control right now and its working well so far! *Fingers crossed*

 

[cookingwithrage]

Well. The only one I can think of right is when I was over at a friends house (enjoying the wonders of beer, of course.), when we start..uhh..hearing noises from his sisters room (keep in mind I was somewhat drunk and he was starting to navigate the floor when walking.), he dashes off (or rather stumbles) to tell them shut up (being drunk we couldn't reason out boyfriend+ his sister+ strange noises=sexy time.). In a few moments he returns with..The most shell shocked, traumatized face I've ever seen a person. And naturally we just kept drinking.

 

[Girl With One Eye]

Being naked and half asleep in my bed with my ex gf, then my mum walks in !! Proceeded to pretend to be asleep (luckily the covers were already over us) and never spoke about it...

 

[Colour Scientist]

Did it slip off during or right after? Because I've only had it happen afterwards.

When I'm with a guy, I usually have him use a condom. However, I usually make the guy in question pull out immediately after he finishes so that the condom doesn't fall off.

See, this is one reason I like sleeping with women - no condom scares.

I think once you stop using condoms it's really difficult to go back to them. They're awkward and sex without them feels so much better.

That's in reference to sex within a relationship on another form of birth control, obviously. For one night stands they're definitely a must.

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Me and my current girlfriend are on our 4th form of birth control right now and its working well so far! *Fingers crossed*

I think once you stop using condoms it's really difficult to go back to them. They're awkward and sex without them feels so much better.

That's in reference to sex within a relationship on another form of birth control, obviously. For one night stands they're definitely a must.

Huh. I've never really had guys complain that much to me about condoms. Except this one guy who I swear went soft at ANY attempt to put a condom on him. So damn frustrating. **sigh** He was like "don't worry, I always pull out in time." I was like "um... no." In the end we compromised and had anal.

Speaking of which - no embarrassing story about this, I was just wondering... what's with all the gross poo accidents during anal? I've been enjoying back-door sex for years, and I've never had that problem. Do these girls just not keep a clean rectum? Did they not take a minute before getting started to go to the bathroom and clean up? Did they not say "oh, hey, I'm a little constipated tonight, so no anal" ...?

If there's poo anywhere near ready to be evacuated, then I either make sure it has been evacuated before getting started, or I say "no back door tonight." Why would anyone want to do that with... stuff in there. That must be super uncomfortable - for both individuals, I would think.

Also, really really gross. Blek.

 

[Smagmuck_]

Once, my girlfriend and I sneaked out to the shed in her back yard. Things began to get a little heated and about ten minutes in, her dad let the dog outside to do his business. And the first place he goes? The shed, and he's scratching at the door.

To this day, I am convinced her dad knows, and I am forever terrified of shedsSeriously, fuck sheds..

 

[WolfThomas]

A girl once got hiccups after giving me oral sex, that was awkward.

Like second time I had sex the girl I was with was a squirter. I didn't know that was a thing at the time (I was like, 15) so when she did it I just stopped and went "did you just piss on my dick?" It was a pretty big mood killer since this was back when I wasn't nearly as depraved as I am now.

That happened to me, but while I was performing digitial sex, something about the angle and my finger meant I got hit square in the chest and face. I laughed hysterically for like a minute, she was not amused.

 

[Colour Scientist]

Huh. I've never really had guys complain that much to me about condoms.

Do you not find it completely different? I know I certainly do.