Escape to the Movies: Transformers: Dark of the Moon
- Thread starter MovieBob
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See, if I want to watch giant transforming robots fight, I'll just go watch Zeta Gundam, or Macross since those still have brains in their skulls.
Give it a rest old chap, it was an exaggeration to drive home the point that this film is catering to the lowest possible common denominator. Yes MovieBob is very biased when it comes to this kind of film but he does have a point, going to see a movie like this (i.e a pretty awful one) and paying for it allows the movie studio to get away with making more utter rubbish rather than actually making semi-decent films because hey people went to see the last one why should we actually put some effort into the movies we produce.meganmeave said:
On a side note are you trying to imply that there is something wrong with legalised abortions?
Agreed. That honor goes to a certain CGI series by the name of Beast Machines. It's predecessor, Beast Wars, was quite possibly the best thing to happen to the brand since it's conception. And then they decided to make a new one with different writers. I prefer not to remember it ever happened.Arkvoodle said:
Haven't seen it, and probably won't since I saw the first two, but you know what bothers me the most about these movies?
What bothers me are the hundreds of people who actually do a really good job and put a lot of effort into these productions, only for the handful of people who have creative control to put all that to waste.
What bothers me are the hundreds of people who actually do a really good job and put a lot of effort into these productions, only for the handful of people who have creative control to put all that to waste.
He voices Sentinel Prime and uses an old Star Trek quote "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few."nintendo414 said:
I don't see why Bob's taking such offense to it--it's an appropriate line considering the situation.
I decided to see this on Tuesday night sort of against my better judgement.. heck, I was at the theater already having just seen the much better X-Men: First Class and I had no other plans for the day... and it was really cheap ($7 for the 3D version). I was still disappointed, mainly because I had heard that it was so much better than the others in the series.
Bob covered all the main points, but I have a few things to add.
1.) No one likes Shia Lebeouf. Yet, the whole pretense of the first 3/4 of the movie is that we're supposed to feel sorry for him because he just doesn't get the respect and hero worship he deserves. Sorry, Mr. Bay, putting yourself in a movie as a proxy shouldn't be this blatantly obvious.
2.) This movie has absolutely no sense at all of tone and consistently. There is action, but it's blah and samey, with only one really cool moment (The honestly sweet Optimus on Megatron Fatality at the end). There is drama, but it's terrible and has no impact. There is comedy, but it's probably the worst and least funny comedy that it shouldn't even be called by the name. As if that wasn't bad enough, there is absolutely no sense of transition or timing in any of it. You will get whiplash as the "film" jumps from terrible action to terrible comedy to terrible drama to comedy to action to etc. Despite all of the other negatives about the movie, this is really the worst aspect of it.
3.) Rosie is ass ugly. Sure, Megan Fox was only sort of hot in that overly polished made for Hollywood and/or an Adult Film career way, but at least she has a genuinely attractive look, especially to her face. Rosie is just ugly. She has a nice body, sure, but I dare you not to shudder any time you see her face in this movie. I don't know if it's the make up or what but.. *shudder* Normally this isn't something I'd comment on in a movie as it really shouldn't matter, but seeing as she is so blatantly positioned as "da sex bomb" (and, near honestly, the only female) in the movie, it needs to be mentioned.
Bob covered all the main points, but I have a few things to add.
1.) No one likes Shia Lebeouf. Yet, the whole pretense of the first 3/4 of the movie is that we're supposed to feel sorry for him because he just doesn't get the respect and hero worship he deserves. Sorry, Mr. Bay, putting yourself in a movie as a proxy shouldn't be this blatantly obvious.
2.) This movie has absolutely no sense at all of tone and consistently. There is action, but it's blah and samey, with only one really cool moment (The honestly sweet Optimus on Megatron Fatality at the end). There is drama, but it's terrible and has no impact. There is comedy, but it's probably the worst and least funny comedy that it shouldn't even be called by the name. As if that wasn't bad enough, there is absolutely no sense of transition or timing in any of it. You will get whiplash as the "film" jumps from terrible action to terrible comedy to terrible drama to comedy to action to etc. Despite all of the other negatives about the movie, this is really the worst aspect of it.
3.) Rosie is ass ugly. Sure, Megan Fox was only sort of hot in that overly polished made for Hollywood and/or an Adult Film career way, but at least she has a genuinely attractive look, especially to her face. Rosie is just ugly. She has a nice body, sure, but I dare you not to shudder any time you see her face in this movie. I don't know if it's the make up or what but.. *shudder* Normally this isn't something I'd comment on in a movie as it really shouldn't matter, but seeing as she is so blatantly positioned as "da sex bomb" (and, near honestly, the only female) in the movie, it needs to be mentioned.
Yeah, thanks for the review Bob, as unnecessary as it was. I just don't get the defenders who way 'stop complaining that it's bad, it's a giant robot movie it doesn't matter'. That's just it - these movies fail as giant robot movies, given how they're constantly upstaged by the human characters.
And that's before you even get into the casual racism, sexism, homophobia, dogs humping, dick humor, robots pissing on people...
I made the mistake of letting myself get roped into seeing Revenge of the Fallen. It was two hours of Michael Bay tea-bagging the audience. I will never knowingly watch another film he's involved with.
And that's before you even get into the casual racism, sexism, homophobia, dogs humping, dick humor, robots pissing on people...
I made the mistake of letting myself get roped into seeing Revenge of the Fallen. It was two hours of Michael Bay tea-bagging the audience. I will never knowingly watch another film he's involved with.
Close but not quite right.TheLastTatlFan said:
The worst bit of Transformers lore is "Kiss-Play," a Japanese radio drama where Optimus Prime & his fellow Autobots gain superpowers by making out with underage girls.
Let's just all thank God Bay's never heard of that bit.
Poor Bob. Well, look on the bright side...um...
Oh hey, did you check out the trailer for Brave? The new Pixar movie looks like it'll be pretty awesome. And it's not starring Reese Witherspoon after all.
For what it's worth, you do still have fans and supporters who enjoy the work you do.
Oh hey, did you check out the trailer for Brave? The new Pixar movie looks like it'll be pretty awesome. And it's not starring Reese Witherspoon after all.
For what it's worth, you do still have fans and supporters who enjoy the work you do.
When I saw Transformers 1, I wanted to punch the whole film.
When I saw Transformers 2, I laid down in the street hoping a car might hit me or something.
When I see Transformers 3, I will be bound like Alex in A Clockwork Orange and doing so against my will.
I'm not asking for Oscar-worthy script-writing here, just something comprehensible.
And as I've said once before: the robots do look as if you fed a porcupine an automotive factory that was shrunk to the size of a pea, and the factory expanded to its regular size when inside said porcupine.
When I saw Transformers 2, I laid down in the street hoping a car might hit me or something.
When I see Transformers 3, I will be bound like Alex in A Clockwork Orange and doing so against my will.
I'm not asking for Oscar-worthy script-writing here, just something comprehensible.
And as I've said once before: the robots do look as if you fed a porcupine an automotive factory that was shrunk to the size of a pea, and the factory expanded to its regular size when inside said porcupine.
It's alright Bob, it's ok. It's over now, these movies can disappear into mediocrity and we never have to hear from them again. We can get Captain America later and it should hopefully breath some life into things for you (not me personally, I thought Thor was great).
Check out his column. The title of it implies a fanboy-free analysis of why Transformers 3 is a terrible movie, and since the problems of the first and second movies were basically the same, I'm betting this breakdown of the third will apply to them all.UNKNOWNINCOGNITO said:
I can't wait until this movie is done. I despise these movies, and to me they represent the stagnation of the action genre, and movies in general. It shows that all you need to do is put a few explosions on a screen and people will pay out millions. That creating characters, good scenes, and a least passable story, even in an action movie, is not required. What happened to the Die Hards and Terminators? How about Star Wars or Indiana Jones? Silly action movies and campy sci-fi can be done well. You don't have to sacrifice the other aspects of a film to create good action. Instead we get this. A horrible movie held to be the standard because people see robot and explosions and are willing to forget all the horrible parts that came before. It is mediocrity held as gold. And anyone who disagrees is a "snob who can't appreciate movies". I can appreciate movies. I DO appreciate movies. That's why these films hurt so much.
There's a few things here that I take issue with. First of all, it's just a movie. It's entertainment. You're really not supposed to take usable knowledge away from it unless it's a documentary or instruction video. So I feel like you saying, "Well, I'm not going to get anything out of it, so the story doesn't matter," is kind of ridiculous. You're not getting anything out of the action scenes, either, unless you're using them to learn how to fight giant robots or something.Warforger said:
Even aside from that, the problem here isn't just that the movie had a simplistic plot and was therefore bad. Complexity doesn't instantly make a movie Oscar material, or even necessarily interesting. The problem is that a movie shouldn't make you want to skip past the meat sections or leave the room altogether, like the Star Wars prequels did for you. If a movie compels you to do anything other than sit down and watch the whole damn thing, it's just not doing its job. Period.