Escape to the Movies: Transformers: Dark of the Moon

[Callate]

Maybe the downturn in the economy will prove to be an excuse not to see TotM? It sounds like it shouldn't take much of an excuse... It would be a shame for people who are reserving their movie-watching money to use it on this.

Well, I'm not going to see it, but I was fed up with 'em it after the first movie. ("The world is about to end! We've got to hurr- AGH don't let mom and dad see the giant robots on the lawn!")

Anyone else find it slightly ironic that the cure for ennui caused by a military-worshipping action movie should be Captain America? I'm not saying it might not be a much better movie, it just seems odd.

 

[Still Life]

So, people who like movies you don't shouldn't be allowed to vote? Wow. That's almost as bad as saying people who enjoy certain kinds of hip hop are a good reason for legalized abortion.

I didn't think it was possible to have this much bile for people who share different tastes than your own.

Michael Bay's Transformers is about as tasteless as you can get. Was there any hope for the Michael Bay trilogy to begin with? The amount of money poured into these films could have been much better spent elsewhere. What a giant waste.

Bob, you should start reviewing indie films. Hollywood's block-buster masterpiece days are dead and gone

 

[Actual]

Brilliant episode. I too am completely bemused by the success of the Transformers trilogy, I truly can't understand what everyone sees in it.

There are plenty of good mindless action movies, this is not one of them.

 

[Treaos Serrare]

Goddamnit Bay,why can't you make a movie that's worth a damn you goofy fuck, ugh he's getting to be WORSE the Shamalama or whatever the hell the bastards name is, things like this make me want to ragequit life with a 60 tetra-ton bomb

 

[Spiner909]

I love those Orange Star tanks.

 

[verindae]

So I get that the Transformers movies aren't particularly good by any measure but they really aren't bad enough for anyone bar the more principled Transformers fans to boycott. People, myself included, will go to see this purely because it's the only way to see a live action Transformers movie.

Would I like to see a Transformers movie that's actually well written and contains, for the majority of the screen time and action sequences, Transformers? Hell yes!
Is there currently, or in the near future likely to be, such a thing in existence? Nope.

It's a sad state of affairs that they couldn't get it right after 3 attempts but I, like many others, wanna see another live action Transformers movie and this is the only way to do that.

I know it's not helping the situation and in fact it's probably part of the problem, but that's the honest truth from my point of view. I guess we can only hope that they prove just successful enough to warrant more Transformers films directed by someone other than Michael Bay.

 

[worldruler8]

Did nimoy do something?

He voices Sentinel Prime and uses an old Star Trek quote "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few."

I don't see why Bob's taking such offense to it--it's an appropriate line considering the situation.

SPOILER ALERT
well, he was only destroying the race of 7 billion humans to save what was left of the people of cybertron, which seems to be less then 7 billion.
END SPOILER ALERT

 

[RJ Dalton]

Michael Bay's interpretation of things is by no means the worst thing to ever happen to Transformers.

Dare I ask what was?

Personally, I'm with Bob on this one. That Michael Bay actually makes money with his films sickens and depresses me in more ways than I care to list. He does for movies what Stephany Meyer does for books; he's the ultimate proof that you don't have to have any skill whatsoever at your chosen craft to be a success at it. To a guy like me, who considers storytelling to be an art, who has worked for more than 14 years now at perfecting his craft, but still can't get a break for whatever arbitrary reasons the publishers decide he's not worth the risk, watching a hack like Michael Bay make millions of dollars by just throwing bright lights and colors at the screen for two hours makes me incredibly fucking angry. It says to me that heart and soul and artistic integrity - all of the things I've based my still nonexistent career on - mean nothing at all.
And it's not just that I can't get a break on this. If everybody out there was better than me, or at worst, as good as me, I'd be fine, but this shit? I wrote stuff that was just as good as the Transformers movie when I was in fifth grade. Fifth fucking grade! I didn't know the first thing about story structure, plot, or the basic elements of characterization and my thought process was basically "I want these two characters to fight and any arbitrary reason works fine for me," and it was just as good as this shit.

 

[Jacked Assassin]

I'm skipping this one for all the reasons I should have skipped the other 2. That & I don't want to be reminded of seeing a transformers film in 3D. But most importantly they killed Ravage in 2 so I could care less.

 

[Ian S]

Well, at least you didn't out-and-out hate it.

That being said, I'm still going to see this movie. And if it means it was just as good as - and maybe even slightly better than Transformers 1 - chances are I'm REALLY going to dig it.

Yes, on hindsight, ROTF was crap. I can't really defend that movie. I didn't even buy it on Blu-Ray if it makes you feel any better. The fact they didn't have a polished script at the time highlighted and laid bare everything that was bad about the franchise. I can't deny that.

Yet at the same time, I don't hold that much reverence for Transformers like you or other fans seem to do. As you might have read before, I have a good 10-year lead on you lifewise, so first of all Transformers never really got to me the same way it did those who were younger; I just saw it as a 30-minute-long toy commercial that I turned off my brain and watched when I got home from high school. It wasn't very substantial (Robotech was where I wanted to go for that). It was TV junk food. The only reason I cared about Transformers: The Movie was because of its PG rating and the fact that "OMG! They're actually DYING in this!" and "Heavy Metal soundtrack! Kick-ass!" and "Did I just hear Spike say 'Shit'?" If it didn't have any of that, it would have been just as bad and forgettable as all the other 80's cartoon movies that were coming out at the time. So when the first one came out, I went in with kind of the same attitude. And when Bay did pretty much the same thing cranked-up to 11, I was satisfied.

So when I look for good, intellectually stimulating Sci-Fi, I don't expect much from Transformers in ANY incarnation to begin with. If I want something substantial, I'll go to Star Trek or Babylon 5. If you look at my movie collection, you'll find masterpieces like The 2001, Dark Knight, Akira, Star Trek II, Dark City and the Lord of The Rings trilogy resting alongside Van Helsing, A.I., Heavy Metal, Flash Gordon and Starship Troopers. It's not always so cut-and-dried an issue.

Or look at it this way, you and I both loved Sucker Punch, yet everyone continues to rip on that movie. I bought the extended cut on Blu-Ray and don't feel ashamed of it in the least bit. Or again, you absolutely loved Splice, yet I found that as good as the premise was, it all fell apart in the last 10 minutes with a...um..."climax" that was totally ripped-off from The Beast Within, and I just couldn't get over that.

So let's just agree to disagree on this one. I don't think that me or anyone else who likes this movie somehow makes us bad people, any more than I think your liking Splice makes you one. And you can at least take some comfort in knowing Michael Bay won't be back and hope that they'll get a better class of director next go-round.

 

[Squaseghost]

Don't worry Bob, next year should rule for movies. Batman, Superman, Brave, The Hobbit...

 

[Formica Archonis]

I like Transformers. AND YES. EVEN THE BAYSPLOSIONS. And I like Shia, too.

WHY SHOULD I NOT VOTE AND DRIVE BOB?

Because you're obviously an inferior being and should be locked up or something. I mean, we let people with IQs of 50 vote and drive but you Transformers fans should be put on an island with the pedophiles [http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-503544_162-20005372-503544.html] or something. </sarcasm>

Honestly, I don't like Bay's movies and agree with some of Bob's points but this sort of self-superior Jimquisition-esque trying-to-be-Yahtzee-and-failing insult-the-audience ranting is just.... It's the reason I don't recommend MovieBob to people. Ever. I watch the reviews, yes, because he's one of the few reviewers who tends to be more hit than miss with me. But he just goes off on these tangents like he hasn't gotten over junior high yet.

It's kind of like knowing a guy who's really great, and you like him, but once a year at random he just starts screaming racist jokes in public for no reason. You like the guy and want to be around him but you're too petrified you're going to be there when he goes off and you don't want to be associated with that, so you visit but never go out in public with him.

 

[Orekoya]

What did Nimoy do?

He apparently makes a cameo in this film.

Uh, he's the voice of Sentinel Prime, the mech mentioned in the review?

Might have something to do with that.

 

[Casual Shinji]

Disliking the Transformers movies doesn't make you a snob, it makes you human.

I can understand that someone enjoys The Matrix sequels.
I can see why people might look kindly at X-Men 3 and Wolverine.
I can fathom that the Star Wars prequels would be to someone's liking.
And yes, I can go as far to say that I can entertain the thought of Indiana Jones 4 having fans.

But the Transformers movies; no!

 

[Meggiepants]

On a side note are you trying to imply that there is something wrong with legalised abortions?

Actually, I was referencing another Bob video (TGO) where he said just that. Implying that people should be aborted who like a particular type of music is pretty heinous.

 

[Zersy]

I liked them. What exactly is wrong with these movies ? I fail to understand why it is terrible.

Check out his column. The title of it implies a fanboy-free analysis of why Transformers 3 is a terrible movie, and since the problems of the first and second movies were basically the same, I'm betting this breakdown of the third will apply to them all.

I tried looking around on google and threw his blogspot but could not find what you were specifying. Could you please direct me to the correct link ? Much appreciated.

 

[Canadish]

Did nimoy do something?

He voices Sentinel Prime and uses an old Star Trek quote "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few."

I don't see why Bob's taking such offense to it--it's an appropriate line considering the situation.

SPOILER ALERT
well, he was only destroying the race of 7 billion humans to safe what was left of the people of cybertron. which seems to be less then 7 billion.
END SPOILER ALERT

Considering what Bob mentioned the message of the movie is(STAY IN THE WAR MUTHAF***ERS), that also conflicts with the message of Star Trek (Enlightenment and Peace).

I haven't seen the movie yet so I can't say for sure, but going by what I just heard about Nimoys role in Transformers is, I imagine it looks as though dear Mr. Spock is going back on what he used to believe.
Again, just based of what I know of StarTrek and what I heard in this review.

 

[Vegan_Doodler]

I agree that the movie was bad, but I would have to say that it actually seamed worse that the first shitty sequel.

Spoiler

{StarScream is killed by sam for god sake}

And at the beginning, Optimus openly admits that the Autobots are essentially acting as merceners for the US Government, WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As for the new shiny dodad they had to find I actually liked that part because it made all the movies make since when put together.
Think about the Deceptacons plans if nothing had gone wrong.
1. Megatron comes to earth to retrieve the all-spark, not to rebuild Cybertron but to give him the advantage over the Auotobots and turn earth's machines into an army (even though he landed hundreds of years ago and we didn't have so much as a tin-opener but OK whatever).
2. Once Optimus had been defeated the fallen would come out of hiding, he and megatron would scorer the earth for the matrix of leadership, Jetfire would still be on their side so he would give them the information he had thus speeding up their search. The fallen would activate that machine that turns the sun into energon (or whatever the hell it was meant to do).
3. Megatron resurrects Vector-Prime who activates the space bridge and brings Cybertron to earth. With the energon, earth's natural resources, human slaves and the machine race created by the all-spark they rebuild Cybertron,....... and inevitably Vector-Prime, Megatron, and The Fallen fight for control (or enter another stupid rock paper scissors thing), and only one of these three stages has to succeed for the Deceptacons to win, It's one of the best evil plans I've ever seen, to bad it was unintentional and we had to sit through so much bullshit to see it.

 

[Arkvoodle]

Michael Bay's interpretation of things is by no means the worst thing to ever happen to Transformers.

Dare I ask what was?

http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Kiss_Play


In a way I think the live-action Transformers films are somewhat like the "Cars" films from Pixar: stupid stuff that makes easy money that funds better and better projects.

And Hasbro certainly puts the money earned by Bay's films to good use- the resulting cartoon shows made after the movies have been some of the best Transformers-related entertainment in decades; featuring excellent action and storytelling.

 

[RTR]

I remember back in '09, when Bruno (Sacha Baron Cohen) was on Letterman, he described his movie saying it was "like Transformsers, but not as gay."

I have no additional comment on that. Just thought I'd let you know.