Escape to the Movies: Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Mana Fiend

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UberNoodle said:
Aiddon said:
well, let's see if this thread breaks the record set by the Expendables.

Also, did you cry a bit when Ehren Kruger (yeah, the guy who brought us Scream 3 and Skids and Mudflap) raped one of the most iconic Star Trek lines EVER? The only thing worse than that is Bay constantly exploiting imagery of the WTC incident and even the fucking Challenger explosion. Fuck you, Bay, I hope you get raped by hobos.

This entire YEAR has been terrible for movies. Like Travers over at Rollingstone said, if we had the Oscars right now it would be a disaster. It's like a reverse version of 1982; there's a lot of product being shown at theaters, but it's ALL CRAP (except for X-Men: First Class)
Yes, 1982 was the greatest year for genre film ever. It shall never come again.

http://www.imdb.com/year/1982/

Beautiful.
True, though I think I prefer 1989: http://www.imdb.com/year/1989. Both excellent years though.

But on the topic, I'm not surprised that Bob hated it at all. But as to whether I'll watch it, hell no.
 

a_swe_mayt_hink

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After the second movie, i pledged to boycotting all transformer films....its pleasing to hear that it was a good choice.
 

FFKonoko

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I think the basic problem comes down to expectations. Yeah, the movies have a lot of subjective flaws that you can pick on, regardless of your background, such as overly busy designs or hard to follow action. However, some people seem to enjoy that style, they like the incredibly complex mechanical robot designs and enjoy the action. Some people have actually gotten behind the characters at a basic level so they can laugh at the stupid jokes involving the family and feel excitement when Sam is dodging explosions. And when they see the trailer for this movie, with large-scale invasion and buildings collapsing, they will go "Yeah, I'm going to watch that. I know its nothing like the Transformers, I know its going to be shallow, but I'm ok with that.".
I don't know about others, but thats what I mean by "turning my brain off". It means that all the flaws are balanced out by them being predictable flaws that I can ignore before the movie starts. It means that the movie is one I've never seen before, but still one that I can be comfortable with, just enjoy without paying too much attention. Most movies, I will not talk through or eat food during, but this movie...I would. And I would enjoy a good time out with other people. We would likely make jokey comments on the way if something strikes us, and make fun of it after it finishes. We would also have had a lot of fun...and a couple days later, all but forgotten it and be keeping eyes out for a good movie to watch. Maybe thats the gist of a 'popcorn flick'?

Edit: Thought of a potential analogy. Transformers is like the first Red Faction, its pretty shitty, but if you play the multiplayer with friends (and don't get overly competitive) its amazing how much fun you can extract.
 

oathblade

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I wanted to say thank you Bob. Because of you I didn't see the first one in the theater. Or the second. I saw them later with enough alcohol I didn't break anything.

For this...hmm...a lot of wine....A LOT...
 

Avistew

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Condor219 said:
I still don't know why they kept referring to the "Dark Side of the Moon". Is Vader there or something? Doesn't the moon rotate and orbit around the Earth, that rotates and orbits around the Sun (that orbits and rotates around the center of the universe)? How can there be a "dark side"?
The Moon rotates around the Earth, and on itself, but it takes the exact same time for it to rotate on itself as it does to rotate around Earth - as a result it always presents the same side to us, so there is indeed a hidden side of the Moon, that we cannot see from Earth. We'd need to fly into space, go past the Moon and turn around.

My guess is that by Dark Side they meant the side we cannot see.
 

AntiChrist

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Oh please! Bob DOES NOT want to take away your driving licence or--- *sigh* why am I even trying?
 

Nigh Invulnerable

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Battle Catman said:
Ah, I was waiting for that.

"If you like this movie, you're a retarded retard who's retarded."
Yep. Bob's articulate attack on people who disagree with him. Way to go, Bob. It makes you look real professional when you bash the audience for their opinions. I'm sick of Bob's personal butthurt attitude creeping into so many reviews. We get it, he didn't like a given film, but we don't need to know about his personal grudges with directors and such.

Maybe I'll see Transformers, just for giant robots stabbing each other in the face.
 

DenSomKastade

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I really liked this review and it sorta reminds me of the music scene today. Everybody just listens to the same crap on the radio without ever finding something that only they like and build a personal music taste. I really hope people spend more time seeing different movies, listening to different styles of music and playing different games. The worst thing is when everything just a grey mosh.
 

kuroikitsune

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LasseZ said:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ao3FuGEGcU8

This is so fitting!
I'm not sure if fitting is the right word for this. Although I do think it proves an amazing point. The scene you're linking to is from Network (1976), a film by Sidney Lumet who is famous for movies like 12 Angry Men (1957)[#6 on IMdB top 250], Dog Day Afternoon (1975) [#180 on IMdB top 250], Network (1976) [#190 on the IMdB top 250], Serpico (1973), amongst others. Lumet was nominated for 4 Academy Awards for directing, but did not win any of them. Lumet's work during the 1970s, which I would consider his most productive and creative years, is astonishing. He was truly an "actor's director" with a focus on cast and character that is generally lacking in the modern Hollywood studio system. Some of his best works are just about people and take place in just one location, such as Dog Day Afternoon and 12 Angry Men. He was a master of claustrophobic sets and tense atmosphere. Lumet films build up the tension slowly and explode in violence making the violent pay off both relevant and more explosive.

The film you referenced, Network, is pretty much the exact opposite of the contemporary Transformers films in every way. Network is about the breakdown of a news anchor, Howard, Beale, that happens live on TV. He snaps and rants against the world because his own life has fallen apart. Fearful of this the network that he works for isn't sure what to do with him, and then the ratings are phenomenonal. So, the network decides to build an entire show around his rants, until one his rants focuses on an upcoming corporate merger between his network and a Saudi Congolmerate. The network president, Arthur Jensen, steps in and has a meeting with Howard Beale, informing Howard that the world is just corporations and nations no longer matter. Beale sees Jensen as a god-like figure and changes his message to a new corporate envangelicalism.

Unlike Transformers and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Network has an actual plot, characters that the audience can relate to, and finally a strong message. Not to mention the acting by Peter Finch, Faye Dunaway, Beatrice Straight, and Ned Beatty. (Finch, Dunaway, and Straight all won oscars for their work on this film.) The audience cares about Beale because they could relate to his problems and his situation. We've all been pushed to our breaking point. We've all wanted to yell and scream at the world. Beale became the mouthpiece for that frustration until finally he is subsumed back into the corporate swamp as they turn Beale's message into a marketable commodity.

To compare Transformers and Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen to Network is completely unfair to all three films. Even if we treat all films as being a part of the same medium, then there is no room for comparison at all. Network is an Academy Award winning film, directed by one the greatest directors of all time, and was one of the best films of the year and one of the most profitable. Network not only commented on the ills of 1970s America, but also was prescient in its comment on later society. Watching Network today is just as powerful today as it ever was. And all of this comes from a satire about a crazy newscaster.

Not to mention that 1976 was not a bad year for films. Carrie, Rocky, All the President's Men, The Outlaw Josey Wales, and Taxi Driver all released in 1976. I'm not being nostalagic for a "better time", but merely pointing out the quality of films released in 1976.


What will Transformers 3 be remembered for? It'll be another over produced, special effects film from the year of comic book films and sequels. With a reported $195 million budget and a lack of characters, undiscernable plot, terrible performances, awful comic relief, and poor direction. Unlike Lumet's master work in directing, Bay is better known for his explosions and ability to devolve a woman, a human being, into nothing more than a fetish object.

Comparing Network to any of the Transformers films makes me weep for the state of the modern film industry. I don't think that the fans of Transformers are idiots, but I have to wonder how they would react to great films like Network or Dog Day Afternoon. Of course who wants to watch a movie about a crazy newscaster or a gay bank robber when you can see chunks of unindentifiable metal rolling round in front of exploding buildings in 3D? Don't mind me, I'm sobbing in the corner and you couldn't hear me over the Dolby Surround Sound System cranked up so loud your teeth rattle.

Also, I think this is the better scene from Network:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v3vbCxj2ifs
 

EchetusXe

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haha, poor Bob had to go and see this abomination. As I am not a critic I do not have to, and will not ever have to, see this "film". I saw Transformers 1 when I was about 13 and it was forgettable but an average film. I saw Transformers 2 a few years ago and hated every second of it, I could not believe how terrible it was. Having learned from my mistake I get to avoid such an experience this time around.
 

Blind Sight

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Love how Bob called out people who think he's elitist after he completely insulted the intelligence of anyone who enjoyed the movie. Class act.

You want to know why people think you're an elitist Bob? It has nothing to do with your opinion on films or games, it has to do with the fact that you tear down people with differing opinions, both indirectly and directly. It's a childish move and completely unprofessional. Frankly, you have the same problem as Bay. You need to grow up.

EDIT: After checking out the thread a little bit more, I can see a great deal of people agree with me. Of course, you'll just continue to turn criticism into some stupid caricature. If you have any integrity, the next time you do a column dealing with criticism of your show you'll respond to this in a mature, sensible fashion. But with what I've seen so far, I really doubt it. Bob, I started watching you back when you were just some geek on youtube, before ScrewAttack and the Escapist. I thought your Game Overthinker commentaries were refreshing and interesting, but now you just come off as petty. Go back to your roots, that's your appeal, not these bitter rants.
 

Treblaine

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Um, if Michael bay has a hard-on for the military then he is a REAL idiot about it.

Where is the significance of rank? Sacrifice? History or the sanctity of the command structure and UTTER Respect for the uniform. THAT is the military. Fidelity, brotherhood, enduring, loyalty and excellence of character and ability and what that means to the human condition.

You know what Bay DOES have a hard-on for: Military Equipment.

He likes guns, the likes jets, he likes rockets, he likes explosions what he clearly does not give a flying fuck about the men and women, organisations and traditions that use them.

I get it, most young guys join the Corps for the guns but the USMC makes much more of them, they make them an eternal member of a deadly fraternity. A Marine may be not much without his rifle, but a rifle is not much without a Marine. Bay just doesn't seem to get that, the way he approaches the military is a means to an end of getting some explosions.

MovieBob shouldn't have to make excuses for lack of deference to veterans. Michael Bay should.
 

kuroikitsune

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I agree completely with Bob. I'm tired of watching films where the special effects are more important than the lead actor or protagonist. I'm tired of 2 hour long films that are only good because the girl is "hot" or the expolsions are big. Film making is about more than big explosions and sexy women. I'm tired of watching the camera linger on some girl's ass or breasts or the super slo-mo walk away from the explosion scene.

I want more. I deserve more as a film goer. I'm not talking about art films. What about Clerks? What about Inglorious Bastards? Fight Club? Inception? Twelve Monkeys? Movies with a plot, characters with depth, a script, dialogue. You know...a film. Caddyshack? Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon? Character development? The Good the Bad and the Ugly? Cinematography and good editing? Blazing Saddles? A movie with a relevant message? Office Space? Dr. Strangelove? A movie that comments on society?

I'm not asking for much. Just a good film. Why should I, why should we, have to settle for mediocrity?
 

TheLastTatlFan

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UNKNOWNINCOGNITO said:
TheLastTatlFan said:
UNKNOWNINCOGNITO said:
I liked them. What exactly is wrong with these movies ? I fail to understand why it is terrible.
Check out his column. The title of it implies a fanboy-free analysis of why Transformers 3 is a terrible movie, and since the problems of the first and second movies were basically the same, I'm betting this breakdown of the third will apply to them all.
I tried looking around on google and threw his blogspot but could not find what you were specifying. Could you please direct me to the correct link ? Much appreciated.
The link to it is right under the video. The blue text that reads "Intermission."
 

Sylveria

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No one thinks you're a snob if you don't like this movie. People think you're a snob if you don't like this movie and insult everyone who does.