Escape to the Movies: Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part Two

[PunkRex]

Not sure if hilarity is worth the ticket price... damn my poor student ass!

 

[Skeleon]

I didn't even know they did a Harry Potter Part 7 on this one. Then again, I didn't watch any of them, so how was I to know that the last one was only half the story?
I guess the makers of this movie wanted to try their own fanfic version of it, but only got so far as a dream sequence for it. Still, better than nothing!

 

[Aiddon_v1legacy]

wow, they actually go there? It's official: Twilight's own script writers and directors HATE this series. I wish they'd kept the dream ending with an added epilogue of the cast members telling the audience "STOP WATCHING THIS CRAP" just to fuck with idiots

 

[esperandote]

I was expecting bob to go, "this review is just a dream, this is what the movie is actually like..."

First world problems, credits gags with too much text and too little time to read them without pausing the video

 

[Darklord008]

Yeah, I am so buying the Rifftrax to this when it comes out. Although I may have to watch this without it beforehand just to get the full-on stupidity of it.

 

[MortisLegio]

Dakota Fanning gets eaten by a wolf? Dakota Fanning... Eaten on the big screen by a wolf? I've been wanting bad things to happen to her since the War of the Worlds remake. I have to see...*It was a dream* NO!

But seriously I might have to go see it just for that one scene.

 

[Safaia]

It's all a dream? [head-desk] That being said I'll wait for a torrent or watch the battle on youtube. I will not give this movie money. Ever.

 

[SnowBurst]

hazarr the world just got a whole lot less faggotory without twilight

 

[Chadling]

Good god, I nearly did I spit take of coffee all over my laptop.

I think I'm going to let my wife drag me to this just so I can revel in the terribad. Yes, without a fight. No bargaining. I'm not even going to bring a sign declaring my support for TEAM BUFFY. I'm just going to go and buy a huge tub of popcorn and giggle hysterically through the entire thing.

 

[kasperbbs]

I almost want to see this, but then i would have to suffer through 3rd and 4th so i could appreciate it's awfulness better, i think i'll pass.

 

[Falseprophet]

Bob, I can't remember the last time you had so much fun reviewing a film. The glee in your voice is close to infectious.

That ending sounds like something from a bad Vampire: The Masquerade LARP...except for all the fighting, which sounds like it was from the best VTM LARP ever.

Have you ever been in a room with 30 people throwing rock-paper-scissors at each other for 3 1/2 hours whining about their retests the whole time? I have, and it was phenomenally dull. Never again! Think I'll watch the big-budget Hollywood clusterfuck instead.

 

[Fayathon]

...Ladies and gentelemen, I think we've finally found the movie equivalent to Sonic 06.

Sonic 06 wasn't so bad that it was funny though.

OT: Goddamnit Bob, I want to see this movie now, but I refuse to pay a dime for it. Nor would I be caught in a theater watching it... But so bad it's great movies are so hard to find anymore.

 

[uchytjes]

When he said that the whole action sequence was a dream, I pretty much died a little on the inside. But alas, if they didn't say it was a dream there would be several, SEVERAL angry blog posts on the internet.

 

[Robot Number V]

This sounds like the absolute best kind of bad movie. I was laughing my ass off when Bob described the final action scene. It sounds fucking amazing.

 

[ProtoChimp]

Jesus Christ that fight scene sounds awesome. I'm actually willing to spend money to see that, it sounds like the exact kind of balls to the wall insane anime style fight I've always wanted to see in Live Action. Sucker Punch kinda did it, but this sounds like the perfect example of "I can do this because FUCK YOU!" If only ticket price wasn't bullshit, I'd wait for that one scene and then just leave after it ends, not even to the end of the movie.

 

[VikingKing]

I'm going to wait for DVD. I'm going to hope the final action scene is placed in such as a way that I may choose the chapter and have it all unfold before me. If so, then I will buy it.

Rent it.

See it with a friend.

...do things we aren't supposed to and get it anyhow. >.>

 

[Tohron]

So somebody appears out of nowhere at the end and resolves everything with a Deus Ex Machina, undermining the entire story? Why am I thinking of a certain character from Mass Effect 3...

 

[impocalyptic]

I never thought u would like a twilight movie. But I gotta see this train wreck for myself now. Thank u so much bob! This is gonna b a good weekend.

 

[Thespian]

Is he saying this scene is better than that one scene Cabin in the Woods had to offer? Highly suspect, I do believe.

 

[WouldYouKindly]

So somebody appears out of nowhere at the end and resolves everything with a Deus Ex Machina, undermining the entire story? Why am I thinking of a certain character from Mass Effect 3...

Please, that was so much worse because Mass Effect actually had a decent story going up till then. Twilight was just the kind of story where a Deus Ex Machina would be used and it wouldn't be considered entirely ruining a good thing. There was nothing good to ruin in the first place.