L4D2: Basically you pick either Coach, Nick, Ellis or Rochelle to play as and fight zombies. Once you get a shotgun you say, out loud "thug life" and put on some Public Enemy. Oh and there is an anti steroid abuse message.
Spec Ops: The Line: It's... Well... *throws Apocalypse Now at whoever I'm talking to* It's that only with sand...
Shit is going down.
You're the only one around.
Grab your tools.
Smack some fools.
Epicness abound. (Alternate line for Diablo-esque games would be: Sell the pants in town.)
(Every game ever. Or, at least, that's what they attempt to be anyways.)
1.The main character lives in a city and must steal to survive. The city is thoroughly medieval, but has been introduced to relatively advanced electric technology. Magic is dying, but not at all unknown. There are legends of a god that once ruled over men in the wilderness, but now his power is too weak to make himself manifest in the open. The hero is going about his business, when he is offered a bizarre contract by an eccentric.
2. The second of three brothers has come to your world and has subjugated it with the help of the third. The third departs, leaving the second to lord over his conquest. Three heroes step forward, but are driven apart by the ruthless and controlling overlord. The heroes push forward, pushing through the shattered remains of the planet, solving mysteries along the way. At least one hero makes it and kills the second brother, grasping his source of power, only to fall into a mirror realm.
This does sound fun! I've got one that hasn't been mentioned yet, too. (Unless I'm ninja'd here)
It's basically juvenile Grand Theft Auto. You can go to classes to do minigames or skip school to punch people and/or ride bikes. Unlike in GTA, there's actually pretty good reason to run away at the highest wanted level. There are guns that launch fireworks and potatoes. Based on his reasoning, the main villain is perhaps the most horrifying, most reprehensible person in any game I've ever seen.
Wake up, act like a emotionally stunted immature jackass, drink yourself silly, fall asleep, solve extremely difficult sliding block puzzles in a dream.
There's this douchebag who pretends to hire you to find some treasure and then blows up your train to try and kill you. You survive and meet an annoying little robot who never shuts up, but it's okay because he's funny. After this you just do a bunch of missions for people which all boil down to "shoot all the things", and they give you more guns which are almost always worse than the ones you randomly find so there's not much point in doing them except for the fact that they're mostly pretty funny. Also, the whole game that same douchebag who tried to kill you is constantly taunting you and makes you want to punch your tv.
Borderlands 2
Your plane crash lands into the ocean but you manage to survive by swimming to this island with a big building on it. In this building there's a type of submarine that takes you underwater to a hidden city run by a right-wing extremist, only there's another guy who keeps trying to take over as ruler. As you explore the city you keep getting attacked by drug addicts but you manage to defend yourself with cool old-timey guns and magic powers.
Bioshock
The world ends. You run around the post-apocalyptic world and fight demons, some of whom join you. One of the other humans who survived armageddon gets to choose how the new world looks, and you help the one of your choice to achieve their goal. However, depending on which version of the game you're playing you might get the option to say "fuck you" to all of them, but unless you want a shitty ending you have to first do a whole bunch of extra shit to please Satan.
Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne
You're some dude stuck in what is basically Vegas when a zombie invasion hits. There are other survivors for you to help, and some story about another dude letting the zombies invade on purpose because he's a dumb asshole, but none of that matters because YOU CAN SMACK ZOMBIES IN THE FACE WITH A POWER DRILL WHILE WEARING WOMEN'S CLOTHES!!!!
Dead Rising 2
A bunch of peeps from the middle ages, and for some reason Darth Vader, hit each other with the bluntest swords in the universe because whoever wins gets the biggest sword in the land!
Soul Calibur 4
You're a (male/female/somewhere in between) gangster who becomes the most respected gangster in the world by flinging shit at peoples houses and running around naked.
Saint's Row 2
You're a woman with the most impressive hair in the world who beats up angels and other weird things. As you beat up these creatures your clothes gradually come off, and when you deliver the killing blow to the biggest baddies you temporarily get completely naked, only you can't see anything because it's off-screen. Also, you get to punch God into the sun.
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time-
You play as a blonde, white guy trying to kill a dark-skinned magic user from the desert. You go around killing everything different from you. Have at least five girls interested in you, one of which is a fish. You save a princess from said evil magic user from the desert. And every human character who isn't white is a thief.
The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask-
You play as the same blonde, white guy from before, this time another non-white person turns out to be a thief (really Nintendo?) who uses demonic power for shits and giggles. You get turned into a darker race and everyone hates you now, and gain the ability to turn into different races, and you can go back in time resetting everything you do. After killing an African warrior just because he's there and defending his locked room with nothing in it, you confine a dark-skinned princess in a small place for shits and giggles, and complete three other dungeons/temples in order to make other people do your work for you. The dark-skinned thief turns out to be good, sort of, you mainly help every white person in town, and every member of the dark-skinned human race are still thieves. Also it's depressing as fuck and the moon is falling.
An FPS - that stands for 'first-person shooter', Grandma - where you play as a space marine in the Aliens universe.
Your objective is to shoot bad guys and suffer from a severe case of disappointment.
God of War (series): MURDER EVERYTHING
Bioshock (series): MURDER EVERYTHING
Deus Ex: Human Revolution: MURDER (or knock out) EVERYTHING
Assassin's Creed (series): Casually walk up to and then MURDER EVERYTHING
Mario (series): JUMP ON (aka murder) EVERYTHING
Kirby (series): SUCK UP THEN MURDER EVERYTHING
Starcraft (series): MURDER EVERYTHING
Warcraft (series): MURDER EVERY MURLOC
Elder Scrolls (series): MURDER EVERYTHING
Professor Layton (series): SOLVE EVERYTHING
Pokemon (series): CATCH AND THEN BATTLE EVERYTHING and maybe put them in a pageant
Spec Ops: The Line: MURDER EVERYTHING YOU HORRIBLE PERSON
Tomb Raider (2013): Mourn your loss of innocence while MURDERING EVERYTHING WITH FIRE
Chuck Mass Effect is the story of an ordinary tech support worker soldier called Chuck Shepard who has his life turned upside down when he stumbles onto the intersect a Prothean Beacon which downloads a series of images into his head. Unfortunately the Intersect Prothean Beacon is destroyed in the process making him invaluable. The images represent crucial intelligence information that holds the key to protecting Western civilization galactic civilization and stopping a great threat to it called Fulcrum the Reapers. Chuck Shepard must become a secret agent Spectre and learn to unlock his full potential as a hero. Along the way he is helped by a Secret agent who was an EX Marine played by Adam Baldwin and a sexy super agent played by Yvonne Strahovski who's ice queen reputation and hard-core demeanor is thawed by Chuck's Shepard's likeable personality and his courage to put himself in danger to save others.
I, for one, was disappointed that he never downloaded the Prothean Beacon 2.0 wherein he learned Kung fu and Gun kata.
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