Explain teenage mothers to me

[Vern5]

Explain Teenage Mothers? Well you see,if a teenage girl has intercourse and gets pregnant and then gives birth to a child, then she is now a "Teenage Mother" I hope this clears up any confusion you had.

Somebody didn't read the OP -_-

Somebody didn't see the joke -_-

I love that any sarcastic remarks I may have had were already done for me

 

[Aprilgold]

Well because schools don't teach kids about fucking condoms and condoms can't be bought by kids younger then 18. I mean come on, kids are going to bang at any fucking time when given the time. Thats why teen pregnacy is a problem is because we as a society don't want to accept that kids will have sex and lose their innocence before that magically happens at 18 years of age.

No, I'm not saying kids should start banging, but come the fuck on. If your going to teach sex ed, teach it with the safety part all the way through.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Romeo/Juliet. Both 14.

There's your answer in a nutshell.

Especially when it's more beneficial to society to have extra fixed spending.

Or you could just take the apocryphal idea that it's their choice and none of our business.

 

[Robert Ewing]

I'm sure there are a lot of reasons.

I met one girl who had a baby at 15, she said that she didn't care what anybody thought of her, or how her life turned out. She just wanted a baby more than anything else, and yes she is a fucking state now, but she doesn't even care...

So perhaps it can be a massively huge psychological thing...

But mostly i'm sure it's just sluts that accidentally get pregnant, and then use the unborn baby as an excuse to receive benefit money, praise from her peers, a speed ticket into adulthood, a free house, to stop her pimp of a boyfriend impregnating other women when he goes out for a binge drink with the lads, and to impose her way of life on to her very, very unfortunate child. Most teenage mothers here in Britain anyway are as dimwitted, and anti-social as their future child will most likely be. They are the scum on the shoe of the bottom of the lower classes, gracefully stanking up the streets with their hair pulled back so far that it smooths out the wrinkles they have received from chain smoking and excessive cocaine use, and their jeggings so tight that you can see every cellulite vain that is humanly possible to push out on a human arse, and you can bet your bottom dollar that they will either have drawn on eyebrows, a Monroe piercing, think classical music is S-Club 7, and will claim that music talent shows were the best idea since the free chlamydia screenings at the local clinics. That's what it's like here in Britain anyway.

i'm going to go ahead and assume that all of this information was not included in the tourism pamphlet? Maybe I should vacation in Madrid instead...

Don't get me wrong, Britain is a wonderful place, full of wonderful things. But like any country, it has an ugly underbelly.

 

[Divine Miss Bee]

i was a teenage mother, thirteen and pregnant. i gave the baby up for adoption because even at the unbelievably stupid age of thirteen, i knew i couldn't handle a baby and that i would have no future if i tried. so i don't understand the mindset of the girls who keep it except that they must be under the impression that they will be able to handle it: babies are no big deal, or anyone can do it, or they are good at something else that "must" mean they'll be good at motherhood (babysitting, taking care of pets, things like that). i can almost get my head around thinking you'll be good at a thing then failing miserably, that's life.

but, i don't believe this is a valid way of viewing yourself in the case of accidental pregnancy because having a child isn't about you. parenthood means that the time of your life that is about you is over forever and now the rest of your existence is about someone else. i understood that about kids when i was one, because i had a mother that refused to accept that and smaller siblings that needed someone to fill that void. it probably takes longer to learn that without an example of everything that can go wrong with parenthood standing in front of you. i feel bad for the kids whose mothers are learning on them, but i also believe that people are able to make the best of the hard lessons and that not all teenage mothers turn out to be horrible mothers. all that said, i still don't understand the choice they make. so let's just say brain worms.

 

[FamoFunk]

Yeah, becuse calling someone stupid without giving an argument as to why isn't at all cuntish.

Calling someone stupid, with or without a reason, is an admission that you believe yourself to be better than they are.

If they've become mothers, I think they've already done something harder than you've experienced yet. Perhaps a little humility, or acceptance of their life choices?

No it doesn't. I never said I was better, I said that kids who jump into motherhood before they're able to care for the brat are stupid because it is. I didn't say she specifically was stupid. However, she said I, specifically, was stupid without a fucking reason behind it, and just because she's fucked without protection and got knocked up and had a baby pop out of her vagina doesn't mean she's excused from acting however the fuck she wants without having to stand up for it. Same goes for everyone.
She made the choice to have the kid, I have no fucking sympathy for her oh-so-hard experience. There's something called abortion. I'm fairly confident she can stand her own ground too if she's so capable, white knight.

They can do and say what they want and I can do and say what I want. And that's that.

I'm glad you addressed this before I got too it, now I can caw my agreement. The suggestion that someone doesn't have to back up their arguments or respond rationally to criticism "because she's a mother" might be among the more retarded notions I've ever heard. She's had a kid and that makes her transcendant? She's not accountable to anyone and doesn't have to engage others and back up her points because some screaming attention seeker is waiting for her at home (not keen on children, myself)? I really don't consider motherhood that special this may be a male thing, but when it's happened billions of times the idea that it's a miracle begins to sound pretty hollow.

At any rate, it seems to me that the woman in question was someone priviledged at 18, to have a house and an income that would allow her to support a child and have the kind of lifestyle she claims to have. I highly suspect that both of those things were the father's if her staying home for the time required during maternity did not threaten that and she would do well to remember that most teenage mothers are not so blessed. To her I say that You really are the exception and not the rule and to harbour beliefs to the contrary is to be possessed of a highly warped worldview. Yes, you're doing well, but I suspect that has more to do with circumstance than any impressive, herculean effort on your part. In this day and age 18 year olds tend not to have steady incomes with which a family can be raised, that might not be the case in other parts of the world, but then they have a different timeline for adulthood then we do so when looking at the industrialized world that is entirely a moot point. If you disregarded MassiveGeek because you felt you were her superior then you may want to take the points made about your circumstances into account before you feel so self-congragulatory over your "success" in the future.

Hello, this is me you're talking about.

Could I ask what sort of lifestyle I've claimed to have? Because I haven't.

I'm fully aware I was lucky to be able to rent a house and pay bills fully while living with her Dad. But so can many other 18yo's

All I've been trying to say in this thread is, what happens to most 18yo's (having a baby for attention, free money and house etc.) also happens to those in there 30's and 40's, it just never get reported because they're older, which is totally unfair, because there's a lot of shit parents out there in their 30's as there are those, say, under 20.
I just see no need to teenage bashing when it happens over all ages, that's all.

I think what we should be concerning ourselves over is whether the child is being looked after properly and not being abused and such.

Oh, and that whole backing up thing, it was because I didn't fully quote the Girl, I just quoted the, "TL;DR they're all stupid mother fuckers" or something to that extent; I just didn't think She should be allowed to get away with calling me, and other Mum's stupid mother fuckers and a lot of other vile stuff She came out with, not to mention calling my child a, "Brat".

It's a shame I've been punished for it though, but I just want to, again, try and get my point across. And because you're talking about me

 

[Montezuma's Lawyer]

"If I get pregnant, I can convince my cheating boyfriend to stop doing drugs, get a job, and stop cheating on me, then everything will go on happily for the rest of forever."

This is essentially the attitude, more or less, with variations.

 

[Erttheking]

My sister doesn't do anything like this but here IQ is around the same non existant level, so let me take a stab at this. Some people hate being told what to do with a passion, even if it's the most minor of things, and they do everything that they can do to rebel against any order that is placed on them. Pregenancy...it's pretty much the ultimate form of rebellion. Long story short, they're young stupid and full of hormones.

 

[Orcboyphil]

Here in the UK, willingly getting pregnant rather than say getting pregnant accidental and keeping the fetus comes from a perception that you'll get a council flat of your own and a number of other benefits so you won't have to work.

 

[Jenova65]

I'm not getting involved in any argument.. but I do need to say (I'm 46 btw so not a teen a mum by any stretch....) I know FamoFunk, I mean I actually know her, I have known her for years, being a parent has been the making of her and her child is very lucky to have the kind of parent that FamoFunk is. That child wants for nothing.. and I don't mean that she is showered with pointless gifts, I mean she has the all the love and all the care that child needs to feel safe and secure in early life.

You may think this means she is an exception to the rule, however, consider that this may just be what today's media want you to believe. I know other young mums too who do a fabulous job, like my best friend's daughter who has two young children and she works, she keeps those kids well looked after and it shows, she doesn't have a *free house* and *benefits* either.

Not everyone is ready for motherhood at 18 but not everyone is ready at 25, or even 30... there are f*ck ups of all ages and there are also shining examples of how to be a great parent within all age groups too. And it does a disservice to decent parents everywhere to assume that younger people CANNOT parent well, or CANNOT possibly be telling the truth if they say they can provide for their child, you know what they say about assumptions, right??

I guess that's all I have to say, really.... It's just a shame that people put on their judgypants and can't or won't hear any different

 

[Aurora Firestorm]

Just posting about this argument in particular - my sister (25) got knocked up last year after mixing the Pill with anti-biotics and having drunken sex with her then-boyfriend.

She complains about money, despite living in our late father's mansion and how she wants a new iPhone, and how her life is stressful and she doesn't have time for herself.

I love my sister and her son, but the last time she complained about this I said "Should'a thought about that before getting knocked up you dumb slut."

She lamented when she found out she was pregnant about how she didn't know the Pill and anti-biotics didn't mix. I said "You should have known. You're a woman, you're an adult, you ought to know."

Are you *serious*? Really? Completely?

I'm assuming you're one of those people who think men should be able to sleep around, while women are the Safeguards of Sexuality and should flee from them and turn them away. Calling a woman a "dumb slut" for making a mistake. Hell, I'm female and definitely not near the "clueless teen" years, and I had no idea whatsoever that the Pill could get screwed up by antibiotics. (Then again, I almost never get sick, so it never came up.) Why don't you call the guy a "stupid manwhore" for not wearing a condom?

I agree that people should educate themselves, but y'know, especially if a girl is living with her family who may not agree with her decisions, she needs a helping hand there. That's what sex ed is for. Half the time, sex ed doesn't do jack, because laws and so forth don't let it actually talk about anything worthwhile. Teenagers' brains are scientifically proven to be still under development, with the "conscious decision-making" bits very much lagging behind, and as such they're going to be driven by hormones and instincts and not thinking straight. We need to arm their brains with as much counter-attack fodder as possible before they go out and do something unfortunate. There's a reason that minors aren't allowed to do tons of things, and that's because they're not good at decision-making, and they're immature. So we can't expect them to figure out kids/sex on their own, either, if we're going to say that they can't figure out anything else on their own.

That's a cold heart you have going on there, to mouth off to your sister who was probably just having a hard time with the kids.

 

[flaviok79]

The work place can be a terrigying place, so I feel that some girls rather take the plunge into early motherhood as a means to be respected for something they accomplished (you know, we all heard a young mother oozing contempt on us people with jobs for not taking responsabilities over another LIFE and being somehow selfish for planning parenthood for a future date and focusing our twenties and early thirthies on building some foundation for our lives).

I see that a lot among friends and, latelly, students of mine.

 

[Zen Toombs]

Spoiler: Maybe they are friends with The Condom Kitty!

Seriously though, the only reason I can think of for a teen to actively seek a pregnancy would be
1) because they want to be an adult [sub]there are much more better ways to do such[sub]1[/sub][/sub]
2) because they want to pair themselves to their current partner for life [sub]not the best reason[/sub]
3) because they are lonely and want a connection to another person, and are seeking that through a child.

Just my .02$

[sub][sub]1[/sub][/sub] I'm good at this English thing.

 

[Benni88]

Judgemental much? It happens, let them get on with it.

 

[Zenn3k]

...Because I really can't wrap my head around the idea.

I can understand accidental teenage pregnancies. Mistakes can be made. People can be eager. Condoms can break. Accidental pregnancies make sense.

What I'm bothered by are these girls who, at a very young age, willingly step into motherhood with smiling faces and eager hearts. Why do they do it? What is the intended satisfaction?

I have an acquaintance from way back in high school. She became pregnant almost immediately after graduating. Rather than be sad or panicked she reported, via Facebook, that all had gone as planned and she was delighted. Fast forward to the present and, just by watching the status updates that I keep forgetting to unsubscribe to, you can tell that she's bored, poor, and lonely (her baby daddy has apparently vanished).

So, who can explain this whole mess to me?

Just as not all men are not good fathers, or shouldn't be fathers...

Same is true with mothers.

Problem is, the womens have the ability to get knocked up pretty much at will, just open their legs and give consent.

 

[James Crook]

My theory is that they only want to be teenage mothers so they could be on 16 & Pregnant...

 

[quantumsoul]

It could be just a biological drive and the lack of sense to control it. Also a lot of girls don't realize how difficult it is to be a mother. They'll see a baby and be like "it's so cute I want one too". Then they get knocked up and end up as full time single moms.

On the other hand I've seen lots of single moms achieve their dreams and live pretty good lives. Sadly not all are as fortunate. I think young women need to really be educated on motherhood. I think would curb the problem significantly.

 

[Bobzer77]

This thread is rather misogynistic and seems to be full of life weary early teenagers and all their knowledge and experience.

Well I guess that sums up the Escapist pretty well at the moment.

 

[FamoFunk]

snip

Thank you for taking the time to check out my profile and Twitter, but what I, and others say about you off the Escapist has nothing to so with this site.

A lot of people thought what you said on your first post I quoted and the others was completely ignorant and stupid, hence the Tweets. But seriously, is there any need to snoop that much?

Oh, and I'm not excusing what I said, I could of did it without getting warnings, but there we go.

Anyway, please stop quoting and talking to me, my last quote wasn't to you, and frankly, I don't give a damn any more.