Favorite Conspiracy theory

[Stryc9]

Favorite as in most believable? Probably the JFK assassination. As a frequent shooter, I do not believe that a single man with a bolt action rifle could have fired that many shots with that speed and accuracy at a moving target.

Besides that, when the shot that takes half his head off is fired he jerks towards the back of the car when according to where they say Oswald was the shot would have come from behind him meaning he would have slumped forward and the chunk of his head that came off would have landed in the driver's lap. Basic physics disproves the single shooter theory.

I'd say any conspiracy involving Obama being some sort of sinister figure hell bent on destroying America from the inside because he's any religion that isn't Christian or an Atheist are pretty high on my list. Also the one where Obama is going to disband congress and the SCOTUS and declare himself King of America using the TSA as his own private army to stomp out dissent among the populace.

I may not like the man as President but jeebus some people have an overactive imagination.

 

[Souplex]

From the popular Moon landing is fake

The moon landing was faked, but the studio where they faked it was on the moon.

who really was behind the assassination of JFK

Richard Nixon assassinated JFK in order to remove his biggest political rival and seize the presidency for himself.

PETA's true goal is to make animal rights people look crazy in order to advance their true agenda of carnivorism.

The rumors that tin-foil hats block mind-control were spread by Illuminati agents who knew that they actually amplify the mind-control signal.

Spoiler: Aliens!

Humans are actually aliens who killed the original inhabitants of America's planet.

 

[Lunar Templar]

Giratina is the Devil

yeah that's really all I got >.> a Pokemon one.

 

[Megahedron]

Time Cube!

"When the Sun shines upon Earth, 2 major Time points are created on opposite sides of Earth ? known as Midday and Midnight. Where the 2 major Time forces join, synergy creates 2 new minor Time points we recognize as Sunup and Sundown. The 4-equidistant Time points can be considered as Time Square imprinted upon the circle of Earth. In a single rotation of the Earth sphere, each Time corner point rotates through the other 3-corner Time points, thus creating 16 corners, 96 hours and 4-simultaneous 24 hour Days within a single rotation of Earth ? equated to a Higher Order of Life Time Cube."

Oldy but a goody.

 

[DefunctTheory]

From the popular Moon landing is fake

The moon landing was faked, but the studio where they faked it was on the moon.

You are, of course, correct.

 

[shootthebandit]

James Paul McCartney is dead.

Yeah, it goes that Paul died in some car crash and they had him replaced with a look-alike. Remember when the Beatles stopped touring and decided to go into the studio so they could do their Sgt. Pepper and Magical Mystery Tour albums and so on? Apparently what they were *actually* making music while teaching this new Paul how to play bass left-handed. And it so goes that in the music and on the album covers, you can see and hear a bunch of clues that hint to Paul being dead. You know, play this song backwards and all of a sudden PAUL IS DEAD.
Seriously, look up "Paul McCartney is dead, Abbey Road", you're going to get hit with:

PAUL'S THE ONLY ONE NOT WEARING SHOES, HE MUST BE DEAD.
PAUL'S GOT A CIGARETTE IN HIS *RIGHT* HAND BUT PAUL'S LEFT-HANDED, SO THAT CAN'T BE HIM!

And those are the two points that make *the most* sense, it only goes downhill from there.

It tore me up a bit when I first heard about it, trying to figure out if it was true or not.
Then I finally took a step back and thought
"But, the Beatles got better as time went on. So they found somebody who was a better musician and all-around Beatle than Paul?"

Yeah, I don't think so.

On a related note. The lennon assassination is a weird one too. I think theres a possibility (although very small) that he was assassinated by the US government. In the height of the cold war releases a song called imagine which basically describes a marxist doctrine whilst being actively against the US government in thier efforts against vietnam. Just imagine who different the war in afghanistan and iraq would be if he was still alive

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

Naziism and serial murder as part of the homosexual agenda.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Pink_Swastika

It's just such a deludedly wacky proposition on every level I try to approach it from.

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

My favourite is david ike's, for several reasons, mainly because its so batshit insane but makes a lot of sense if you dont take it literally. For those unfamiliar, david ike believes the queen and world leaders such a george bush to be shapeshifting lizard aliens. I think it tells you a lot about politics and that, most politicians seem to be slimy, blowing in the wind of prevailing popular view and you could see them as lizard like in quite a few ways. Mostly self serving, like lizards, no disrespect to lizards but I doubt any lizard is thinking of the bigger picture, rather MUST SURVIVE, MUST CONSUME INSECTS, MUST COME OUT FIRST IN THE APPROVAL POLLS, MUST SURVIVE EVEN IF I HAVE TO FUCK OVER MY LIZARD BROTHERS.

Now I'm not going to jump on his wagon. But even though this theory seems to be the most crazy of them all, it does touch upon a big question.

Which is, if life has existed for so many millions of years, why did intelligence as we know it, only show up in homo sapiens after such a long time.

If you think about it, survival of the fittest, being smart is a huge asset. And the mutations to make a brain smarter, is much easier to imagine being perpetually introduced as opposed to for example evolution of wings.

So the question goes, why didn't intelligence show up as soon as it could. In dinosaurs for example. Smart lizards.

And so the conspiracy theory reaches back to the earliest forms of life, and imagine that they did actually become intelligent, somewhere in space/time whatever.

But it's a good question infact, why they didn't become intelligent. What in Darwins theory is preventing intelligence? It's only happened once, in man, and that's 150.000 years ago in a 65 million year long span. Which seems absurd.

Other intelligent species did evolve. Neanderthals were intelligent for example. Mankind simply murdered all the competition.

 

[Robot Number V]

I'm gonna have to go with Assassin's Creed, because the "Truth" glyphs in AC2 prove that, in the Assassin's Creed universe, pretty much ALL the conspiracy theories are true. Hell, pretty much everything that has ever happened in the history our species has been part of a conspiracy, says Assassin's' Creed.

Spoiler: Several massive spoilers for a game that came out at LEAST five years ago.

Basically, if someone has risen to power, they did it with alien technology. That includes people in politics, AND economics. Hitler? Given alien technology. Joan of Arc? Had alien technology. Jesus? Probably half-alien, along with every other "Messiah" figure in our mythology. Henry Ford? Brainwashed people with...You guessed it...Alien technology. Edison and Tesla? BOTH using alien technology. Ghandi, just about all the major powers in WWII, and many, if not all, of the Popes? They all had some, too. In fact, your TV is currently spying on you and reporting back to the people with the alien technology. The moon landing? The JFK shooting? World War II? Colonization of America? Most systems of government? Organized religion itself? ALL created or orchestrated based around controlling alien technology, which is then used to control people.

Basically, the entire history of our species was been shaped by two completely secret groups fighting for control over pieces of alien technology. Oh, and the aliens are the inspiration for just about any god in our mythology. Also, they created us. ALSO, the whole "Mayan 2012 Apocalypse" thing is TRUE.

It's the most convoluted, extensive ridiculous insanity that I've ever seen...And I fucking love every bit of it.

 

[Deathlyphil]

Best one I heard was about the Moon landing. It went along the lines of:

They did land on the moon. However, the cameras they were using weren't sealed/shielded properly, and the harsh environment and solar radiation destroyed the original film. So NASA had to fake the footage so that they actually had footage of being on the moon.

 

[siomasm]

The best conspiracy theories spring from the most mysterious and tenuous bits of truth. The Bohemian grove and stonemasons for instance. I'm sure everyone has head of the stone masons, but for the grove:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bohemian_Grove

The conspiracy generally centering around their goals for shaping the US and world at large, though more likely things are not unlike ancient Rome, where money and influence can easily see someone into presidency, and this happens to be a club for rich and influential people.

 

[EightGaugeHippo]

Hollow Earth theory, the idea that the Earth is completely hollow, with inverted land mass and a central sun (pictured) and that there is an opening in the arctic. Spaceships use this entrance to land on our planet undetected, be them Alien UFOs or Nazi's returning from the moon base.

People actually believe this sh... I mean yeah Hollow Earth *drags spliff* totally real maaan.

 

[Yopaz]

From the popular Moon landing is fake

The moon landing was faked, but the studio where they faked it was on the moon.

Actually, the moon landing is fake. They did it on Neptune because the moon is one of CIA's main bases. They faked the moon landing to prevent the Russians from beating them to it and discovering the truth behind it.

OT: I kinda love the crop circles thing. Some years back there was one brilliant crop circle which obviously was a response to the message we have been broadcasting into space. It explained that they were silicone based creatures and they had a slightly different DNA than humans.

Now if we were to believe that aliens would communicate through agriculture rather than leaving a message that won't be erased as quickly and rather analyse the information we got from this then it doesn't take much to dismiss it as fake. Silicon based organisms... DNA. Considering DNA is composed mostly of carbon then that's impossible. Also we have toyed with the idea of silicon based organisms because silicon is closely related to carbon, well, sure it got some similarities. However we can't actually create the same polymers with silicon and we're limited to short chains.

Also recently they have decided to communicate with us through the use of binary codes. Why is it that we assume binary to be universal? It's just as arbitrary as any number or language. We've given it meaning and because of how we use it got some meaning. Just because we think of binary codes as computer language that doesn't mean aliens will be using it.

So the question goes, why didn't intelligence show up as soon as it could. In dinosaurs for example. Smart lizards.

Why didn't intelligence evolve in dinosaurs? Ineffective nerve tissue. The evolution of glial cells and myelin to keep the nerve signals from "leaking" out of the axons is very important in the evolution of intelligence. At this point the nerve tissue is believed to be so inefficient that a dinosaur could be bitten by a predator and take more than a minute to actually feel the pain. Asking why dinosaurs couldn't be intelligent is kinda like asking why my NES can't run Crysis.

Also how do we define intelligence? Dogs have adapted a lifestyle where they're basically parasites. They feign emotions to suit what we expect them to feel. Dogs and cats do to a varying degree manipulate humans. Some species of birds pry open milk bottles and we've had to find methods to prevent this from happening and the birds have then found methods to adapt to our new methods.

We're manipulated by pets and outsmarted by birds. They might not have the same type of intelligence, but I'd say we're not the only intelligent beings.

 

[Anja Bech]

Other intelligent species did evolve. Neanderthals were intelligent for example. Mankind simply murdered all the competition.

Actually, evidence support the theory that we interbred with Neanderthanls. The theory that Homo Sapiens Sapiens murdered them all has been mostly debunked by now.

 

[Aitruis]

Many of the Obama conspiracies are good for a laugh, especially at the expense of someone who actually believes them. I don't like the man, but really? Lizard alien? Bush Sr.'s illegitimate love-child? Communist? Somalian pirate?

There is one specifically that I find either amusing, or slightly irritating, depending on who I'm talking to at the time. Let's get something straight. Freemasons exist. The Illuminati don't. The two are not one in the same. No, it is not a secret that I am a Mason. To borrow a quote from a good friend and Brother of mine, "We are not a secret society. We are a society with secrets!"

Yes, as a Freemason, there are some things I can't tell people on the street. I can, however, promise that none of these involve plots to take over the world, treasure buried in my basement (or anyone else's basement, for that matter), plots to convert all the world to [insert religion here]; ooh, another good one, Masonry is not a religion. Yes, we are religious, that's not the same thing.

I am not rich. Certainly there are Masons that have done well for themselves, but that was through their own hard work. I am a student with a truck that currently insists on having a part or two replaced every ten miles.

Out of all of them, though, the insistence that the we're the Illuminati is the most wacky. I've even met people who believe, and cannot be convinced otherwise, that the Illuminati disbanded, only to *reform*, starting the Freemasons. Nevermind that they'd have to time travel about two thousand years to do that, but whatever.

Oh, and the Knights Templar ARE NOT A NINJA CLAN. He was serious, I shit you not.

 

[Signa]

I'm going with the 9/11 truthers. It may have been on TV, but I know what I saw. There was no controlled detonation.

 

[Feedmeketamine]

My grandad was a mason, its basically scouts for adults, and they help each other out in business, like a big circle jerk.

I actually have an illumati eye tattoed onto my arm, I just like the way it looks, but looking at it historically it was originally a christian sybol, with the 3 sides representing the trinity and the eye respresenting the eye of god.

 

[2012 Wont Happen]

Other intelligent species did evolve. Neanderthals were intelligent for example. Mankind simply murdered all the competition.

Actually, evidence support the theory that we interbred with Neanderthanls. The theory that Homo Sapiens Sapiens murdered them all has been mostly debunked by now.

Our DNA is roughly three percent or less Neanderthal. We interbred with some, but the vast majority we killed off.