Favorite Mass Effect 2 Quotes

[T-Bone24]

Crewman (to ship cook): "Hey Rupert, you done something different with this? Tastes like you put in a lot more food and a lot less ass."

 

[Acier]

The Krogan scout in Mordin's loyalty mission

Shep "It would take a real badass to make it back to camp injured"
Krogan "I can do it"
Shep "I said a badass not some whiny scout who whines like a quarian with a tummy ache"
Tali "Hey!"
Krogan "RAAAWG I CAN DO IT" *runs off*
Tali "...I can't believe that worked"

 

[Antitonic]

I'd have to go with either:

Asari: It's decided. I'm buying a fish
Turian: Fine. Ruined the whole Citadel for me.

Or:

Joker: My last ship got on just fine without an AI telling me 'the airlock is ajar'"

I can't remember if these are exact, but close enough for government work.

 

[Quad08]

snip

When people tell you to use the search bar, i like to quote Lethal Weapon "you know why i don't have an ulcer, because i know when to say i don't give a fuck. And i don't give a fuck"

Haha thanks. I'll be sure to remember that

 

[Spoonius]

Not a quote, but the part where the stoned Volus tried to launch a biotic missile was hilarious. Plus the conversation before that was great.



JOKER: "You just want me to go through the ducts again."

EDI: "I enjoy the sight of humans on their knees."

JOKER: *blank stare*

EDI: "That was a joke."



ENGINEER DANIELS: "It [Miranda's uniform] certainly makes me stand to attention..."



PURGATORY PRISONER: "I hear their screams at night... it's great..."

 

[BigStupidJellyfish]

Im Commander Shepard, and this is my favourite store of the citadel- Advertisement

 

[thebobmaster_v1legacy]

"Don't. fuck. with Aria."

My jaw actually dropped at that line. "Dude, did Mass Effect just drop an F-Bomb?"

On topic...

EDI: We can save the Normandy, Mr. Moreau, but you're going to have to help me. Give me the ship.
Joker: What, are you crazy? You start singing "Daisy Bell" and I'm done!

And also (spoilers for a romance track):

Spoiler

Garrus: 'I'd wait, if you're okay with it. Disrupt the crew as little as possible...and take that last chance to find some calm just before the storm. You know me, I always like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink.'
*long awkward pause consisting of Shepard just staring at Garrus with a sly smile*
Garrus: Wait... that metaphor just went somewhere horrible.

 

[Drundy]

I like all of the jokes from that citadel gaming dude.

 

[Jerich0]

I love the part where Ellis says 'Hey, I ever tell ya'll bout the time me and my buddy Keith were in a burning building and we had to fight our way through like five floors of zombies to... oh, wait. That was you guys. Man, I can't wait to tell my buddy Keith about that!'

 

[Cosmic Naginata]

Legion "We are building a consensus please try again later."

Joker "Garrus has finally pulled that stick out of his butt only now he wants to beat people to death with it."

 

[LordMoose]

I liked the very heartbreaking conversation of the Salarian Father, talking to his Asari daughter about getting his wife a gift, that would last. He was already 35, and he knew he didnt have long with his daughter and wife. And the daughter's voice broke up a bit, brought me to tears it did...

 

[Shaegor]

I completely loved the bit where Miranda and Jack were having a fight. Joker tells Shepard to go clear it up and then finishes with "Take pictures"... Still can't stop laughing.

 

[archvile93]

"This one has forgotten whether or not it has replaced its weapons' heat sinks. It wonders if the criminal scum considers itself fortunate."

"The Council thought the first Hanar Spectre would play by the rules..."

"I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A SCIENTIST SALARIAN!"

"I enjoy seeing humans on their knees. *pause* That was a joke."

"If she [EDI] starts mouthing off about being the 'vanguard of our destruction', I call shotgun on the first lifeboat out of here."

[hr]


And the hilarious conversation between the lovestruck turian and oblivious quarian on the Citadel. You know the one.

Yeah, "You need someone who'll treat you right. Someone who's food you can eat." I think that's how it went anyway. With the food problem, I'm pretty sure species can purchase genetic modifications so they can metabolize foods they normally can't. At the very least, I know Drell can do something similar with their eyes so they can pick up on hanar bioluminesence.

And also (spoilers for a romance track):

Spoiler

Garrus: 'I'd wait, if you're okay with it. Disrupt the crew as little as possible...and take that last chance to find some calm just before the storm. You know me, I always like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink.'
*long awkward pause consisting of Shepard just staring at Garrus with a sly smile*
Garrus: Wait... that metaphor just went somewhere horrible.

I was male so I didn't hear that one, but that's just priceless. Almost makes me wish I did go transgender just to hear it.

 

[Photon987]

"THIS HURTS YOU."

I really hope that the writer got a bonus for that little gem.

 

[Uilleand]

Joker - "How d'ya like THAT, ya sonsabitches!!"
So.
Much.
Win.

 

[BlumiereBleck]

"haa"

 

[TheLefty]

Garrus once said something along the lines of something about how he sparred with someone who he had a disagreement. "We sparred for hours, I had reach but she had flexibility. After 9 rounds the [referee] called it a draw. We settled it in her quarters. Like I said, I had reach, but she had flexibility."

Followed by the creepy smile my Sheppard made that didn't quite fit his face made the quote even better.

 

[Pringles]

Cant remember the exact quote but:
Shepard:"I didn't think i'd see a Krogan scout huddled in a cell whining like a Quarian with a tummy ache!"

Random crew member to the cook:"it tastes like you used more food...and less ass!"

Love this game so much it's probably wrong.

 

[owmybody]

where did the tali/garrus argumant happen

 

[Mogget128723]

"Please Shepard; I'm a Quarian! Give me a hunk of scrap metal, a circuit board, and some element zero, and I'll have it making precision jumps!"

I love Tali (and Quarians in general)

And Joker's awesome too. Anything that comes out of his mouth... though this is a personal favorite.

"Hey, thanks commander! Another dangerous alien on the ship! Why can't you collect coins, or commemorative plates or something!?"

Then there's

Shepard: A little harmless self promotion, EDI. You can let that slide.
Joker: That's it. Go pout. I win.
Shepard: Joker...
Joker: Alright, alright! Good game!

And

"It's just that I'd never pictured the coming overlords to be so... annoying."

And of course

"If you start singing Daisy Bell, I'm outta here!"

Then the stoned Volus...

"I AM A BIOTIC GOD!! I am a great wind that will sweep all before me like... a great wind! A GREAT BIOTIC WIND!!"



And in terms of good, serious bits... I really like how they played out the bit where Tali finds out about her father.

And then a bit that just made me lol...

At the very end of the game, there is a very long fall. Shepard survived, and Tali and Legion were in my squad (as my two favorites) I walked over to Legion and turned him over... the bot was dead. I run over to the tiny Quarian (who has a huge chunk of metal lying on top of her) move it, and guess what! The Quarian survived. The invincible robot can't take as much as the girl who can't leave her suit for her immune system XD