Favorite Simpson Quotes

kerbouchard

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Sep 25, 2009
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Mexican Flanders "Beunos Ding-Dong-Diddley-Dias!"
Skinner "Milhouse! Lower those eyebrows! And the other one!"
 

Artina89

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Oct 27, 2008
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A log with Lisa's face crashes through a restaurant named Kentucky fried panda (or something like that)

Homer: NOOOOOOOO! It was finger ling-ling good!!!

Shame I can't remember the name of the episode.
 

TheGreatCoolEnergy

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Aug 30, 2009
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Burns is watching Homer eat donuts with a security camera.
Burns: "Yes! Eat your donuts! Little do you know you draw ever closer to the POISON DONUT! Uh, Smithers, we do have a poison donut right?"
Smithers: "Uh, no sir. I talked to our lawyers and they agreed that would be considered murder."
Burns: "Damn them and their fancy laws!"

I have probably based my whole life around that.
 

Jumping_Over_Fences

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Apr 15, 2009
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Pretty much these:


(Just the opening question and answer)


I could go on for days, but I'll stop with these examples. Plus, this way I can do less typing Suckers...
 

Ninjamedic

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Anything Hank Scorpio Says:

"I dont expect you to talk, I expect you to die and have a cheap funeral"
 

Antiparticle

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Dec 8, 2008
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Ah, The Simpsons. There are countless hilarious lines in that show. The first one that came to my mind is:

"If he's so smart, how come he's dead?"

(from 'Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?')
 

EeveeElectro

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Aug 3, 2008
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"My cats breath smells like cat food." - Ralph.

*crashes into a deer*
Homer: D'oh!
Marge: A deer?
Lisa: A female deer!?
 

Vanguard_Ex

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Mar 19, 2008
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'I travelled the world, and the seven seas...III AM WATCHING YOU THROUGH A CAMERA'

That snore-altering machine that Homer wears :')
EDIT:<youtube=pOianOIp6g8>

Viola.
 

Falseprophet

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Jan 13, 2009
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Asturiel said:
Snapekillsdumbledore said:
"DENTAL PLAN"
Lisa needs braces.

OT: Heres two, the others seemed to have disappeared from my noggin.

Homer: Let the bears pay the bear tax! I pay the Homer tax!"
Lisa: That's the home owner tax.

Homer: *making the circus out of potatos*
THATS IT I'M GOING TO CLOWN COLLEGE!
The power-plant strike and the Clown College are still my two favourite Simpsons episodes ever!

********************

In flashback:
SQUEAKY-VOICED TEEN: You can't treat the working man this way! One day we'll rise up and form a union, and then we'll get the fair and ethical treatment we deserve! But then we'll go too far! We'll get lazy and shiftless, and the Japanese will eat us alive!

BURNS' GRANDFATHER: The Japanese? Those sandal-wearing goldfish tenders? Bah! Flimshaw!

Back in the present:

C. MONTGOMERY BURNS: (whistfully) If only we had listened to that young man, instead of sealing him up in the abandoned coke oven.

*********************

LUIGI RISOTTO: Krusty the Klown! What a beautiful date! And such lovely children! Come, I get you a table inna da back away from this-a scum.



LUIGI: I only consider you scum compared to Krusty!



LUIGI: Ya, you see how you-a scum.

**********************

Although as a Frasier fan, I also liked:

SIDESHOW BOB: Cecil, no civilization in history has ever considered Chief Hydrological Engineer a calling.

CECIL: (clears throat)

SIDESHOW: Yes, yes, the Cappadocians, fine.


I could do this all day.
 

Valkyrie101

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May 17, 2010
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"Don't be silly Lisa. Vampires don't exist, they're make-believe, like imps, elves and Eskimoes."
 

Juzzco

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Jun 18, 2010
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"Now my story begins in Nineteen-dickety-two. We had to say "dickety" because the Kaiser had stolen the word "twenty." I chased that rascal to get it back, but gave up after dickety-six miles.-Grandpa Simpson
 

Vorocano

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Jan 8, 2009
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So, so many.

Homer: "Selma, my dear, how are you? Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh ... Listen, shut up for a second."

Homer: "I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, save me Superman!"

Homer: "I can't live the button-down life like you, Marge. I've got to have it all! The dizzying highs, the terrifying lows, the creamy middles. Sure, I may offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odour. I'll never be the darling of the so-called city fathers, who'll stroke their beards and cluck their tongues, and talk about, 'What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?'"
Edit: apparently I misquoted this a bit, but such is life. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ub8NeH_eQ8k&feature=related
 

buddee1

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Jan 11, 2009
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googleit6 said:
Homer: I can tell the difference between butter and 'I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.'".
I think it's from "Secrets of a Sucessful Marriage".
"no you cant Mr. Simpson, no one can"
from homer goes to college
 

Shoggoth2588

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Aug 31, 2009
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Mr. Vanhouten: Milhouse, you said you just needed to use the bathroom. Now I find you buying comic books!?"
Comic-book Guy: Our transaction is complete, you may take the boy.
Milhouse: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait!! [as he is dragged off by his dad]
 

the-messy-ghost

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Oct 11, 2009
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Homer: Am I turning you on?
Marge: No Homer i'm going to sleep.
Homer (in a deep voice): What if i talk like this?
Marge: Goodnight Homer!
Homer: What if i sing to you? (singing) I gave my love a chicken it had no bone... mmmmm chicken.

I can't remember what the name of the episode is but it is the one where homer becomes a monorail driver.