Favourite simpsons quotes

[FrankDux]

It's easily "Beer: the cause of, and solution to all of life's problems"

 

[Kaname13]

Marge: Homer it's easy to criticize.
Homer: Fun too.

[The Simpson family visits a cybercafe.]
Lisa: Wow, Dad, you're surfing like a pro!
Homer: Oh, yeah! I'm betting on Jai-alai in the Cayman Islands, I invested in something called "News Corp"...
Lisa: Dad! That's Fox!
Homer: AAHH! Undo! Undo!

 

[Fronken]

Lisa - "Im gonna have to ask mom first"
College Student - "You still live with your mom?"
Lisa - "uh, no, Its this gay guy we live with, we call him Mom"

and

"I'll have a whisky drink, i'll have a vodka drink, and if i have to pee, i'll use the kitchen sink" (Homers spoof of Song 2 by Blur)

 

[Barciad]

Lionel Hutz : "He hates me"
Marge : "Why?"
Lionel Hutz : "Cause I kinda ran over his dog"
Marge : "Kinda?"
Lionel Hutz : "Well if you replace 'dog' with 'boy' and 'kinda' with 'repeatedly'"

Homer : Help me God!!!
[phone rings - Homer picks it up]
Homer : Hello
Phone : Hello Homer, this is God....frey Jones

 

[MRMIdAS2k]

Lisa - "Im gonna have to ask mom first"
College Student - "You still live with your mom?"
Lisa - "uh, no, Its this gay guy we live with, we call him Mom"

and

"I'll have a whisky drink, i'll have a vodka drink, and if i have to pee, i'll use the kitchen sink" (Homers spoof of Song 2 by Blur)

Thats actually "Tubthumping" By Chumbawumba

 

[Duck Sandwich]

Homer: Wait a minute! Guys like me? I'm a guy like me!

Mr. Burns: What good is money if you can't inspire terror in your fellow man?

Moe: I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.

 

[Bob Loblaw]

Buddy, your car was upside down when we got here. And as for your Grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that.

 

[Draguin]

Definately the episode where Homer is in the Navy and is surrounded by boats from different nations saying, "its my first day" in all the different languages.

Oh yeah also this one:
Homer: "This perpetual motion machine she made is a joke...it just keeps going faster and faster. Lisa, get in here! In this house, we obey the laws of THERMODYNAMICS!"

 

[Lord Krunk]

And of course I have to love the Max Power song.

Oh, this is my ABSOLUTE favourite:

Man (Can't remember who): Max Power! Great name!
Homer: Yeah, I got it off a hair dryer.

 

[rottenbutter]

Fat Tony: I don't get mad, I get stabby.

 

[Russian_Assassin]

Oh I remembered one more!

While being in a ready to erupt volcano, or some other bad situation

Homer: Jesus, Allah, Buddha! I love you all!

 

[newguy77]

"Oooh, so Mother Nature needs a favor?! Well maybe she should have thought of that when she was besetting us with droughts and floods and poison monkeys! Nature started the fight for survival, and now she wants to quit because she's losing. Well I say, hard cheese."
-Monty Burns

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel." Homer on the phone

I have a t-shirt of that.

 

[COR 2000]

(During a musical episode)

Snake:"Ka-BLAMMO!!"
*Nothing*
"Wait here while I get some AMMO!"

 

[COR 2000]

And of course I have to love the Max Power song.

Oh, this is my ABSOLUTE favourite:

Man (Can't remember who): Max Power! Great name!
Homer: Yeah, I got it off a hair dryer.

And who could forget Spider-pig?

 

[jim_doki]

"I got a Question, Shut up!"

"Why did you think a giant balloon would work?"
"Shut Up, Thats why!"

"Hello, is that President Clinton?...Good. I figured if anyone could tell me where to get some Tang, it'd be you.... Shut Up!"

 

[Lost In The Void]

Homer and God talking in the Apocolypes episode

GOD: Oh don't even talk about that i sent my son down to save you, and i don't know what you people did to him but he's never been the same since

(Jesus spinning on a swing)

Homer: Well sir you just made yourself an enemy

Same Episode

GOD: Well in order to do that i'd have to turn back time

Homer: Superman did it

 

[jim_doki]

Barney: Congratulations Barney, the better man won
Cape canaveral Director: That's very gracious of you Homer, wont you join us in a toast to the mission
(All four raise their glasses): to the mission)
(Barney sips)
Barney: IT BEGINS!!!!!
(barney grabs the bottle of shampagne, begins chugging. Grabs a rocketpack)
Barney: Trala la lump ti do!)
(Takes off, crashes)
NASA scientist: I don't understand it, that was non-alcaholic shampagne!

 

[haveyouseen_mywallet]

homer: everytime i learn something new, something old gets pushed out. remember that time i took that wine tasting course and i forgot how to drive?

marge: you were drunk!

homer: and how!

 

[ace_of_something]

Homer: "You'll have to speak up; i'm wearing a towel"

edit: DAMNIT BEAT TO IT!