Films that you regret watching

[Spookimitsu]

Some sort of indian burial ground esque movie, where father takes his dead son's body (age 5 or something) and buries it there thinking it will bring him back to life. Instead the kid is alive, but body is controlled by some sort of demon. Demon tries to kill father, father is forced to kill son by burning the body along with his house.

I cried.

Sounds like Pet Semetary?

 

[AKDread]

i say the ruins was also a bad movie

 

[kenu12345]

You want to know a bad movie? I remember this one movie called November. You couldn't understand what was going on in that movie if you tried

 

[nexus]

Hrm, that award should probably go to "Human Centipede".

I only watched it because of all the commotion on the web. To my non-surprise, it turned out to be poorly veiled dungeon/scat porn.

 

[gorfias]

Napoleon Dynamite. As aptly put by the only review about it I remember, it felt like they were trying to market the film to a group they spent most of their time mocking. For a more personal (and possibly overanalytical) reaction: it felt like they were trying to model the main cast off of Willy Loman (Death of a Salesman), but couldn't understand what made Willy work as a character. They just spent so much time hammering into our heads that the main characters were just below mediocre. It was as if the directers looked at Miller's production and came to the conclusion that an inconsequential nature alone is enough to make a compelling tale, and decided to make a movie around that concept. The result was a half-baked film that made a point of mocking the characters without any actual motive for doing so other than a cheap laugh, compounded by a weak narrative lacking even an arching theme.[footnote]This paragraph has since been edited to [hopefully] better reflect my intended meaning, but as I've gotten several responses about this part of the post thus far, allow me to further clarify: No, I am not comparing Napoleon Dynamite to Death of a Salesman as distinct entitites. My intent was to say that it felt that the former was trying to be the latter and failed spectacularly due to its inability to understand why Miller's play worked in the first place. Comparing the two on their own merits would be as pointless an endeavor as comparing Titanic the Legend Goes On to James Cameron's Titanic or the Last Airbender to the show from which it got its name. The only grounds for any of these, as far as I'm concerned is to point out the common source material and the failure of one to capture the essence it needed to make its material work.[/footnote]

It really was a love it or hate it kind of movie. I loved it. I am worried they want us to laugh at people with obvious limitations, but I think they don't. They want us to cheer. And we do. And we laugh at ourselves as well. I want a time machine that works too, dang it!

It makes 1 out of 5 of my favorite comedies since the 00s.

 

[DugMachine]

Eraserhead.

I am traumatized for life now.

Haha that movie still confuses me to this day :\


Not going to read all 15 pages buuuut inb4 "Sucker punch, bob recommended it and it sucked hurr durr I liek pie". I fucking loved Sucker Punch.


Anyways, the Twilight movies with my girlfriend. Holyshit those movies are bad. I didn't enjoy the Lovely Bones cause I felt so uncomfortable for the entire thing. It's a good movie but ugh I wanted to rip that guy to shreds.

edit: oh my goodness. How could I forget the Eragon movie? That movie hurt my soul. I fucking loved the books and when I saw that steaming pile of shit I had to force myself to sit and watch it till to end to try and find something, ANYTHING to like... never happened. Somebody gave me the movie as a gift and when they went home I broke that shit in half threw it in a fire.

 

[Shaved Apple]

Watchmen, Transformers 3, Ghost Rider 2 come to mind first.

 

[Goofguy]

I'd have to go with Valhalla Rising. I thought I was going to be watching Mads Mikkelsen as a badass Viking, taking down his enemies in a brutal fashion. Instead, I got quite the possibly the slowest paced movie in the history of cinema. There's only so much watching Mads's one-eyed face as he silently stares off in the distance that I can take.

 

[DJ_DEnM]

To the end? Probably none by choice. I've been dragged to movies by family/friends/girlfriends, such as Justin Bieber's movie. Terrible experience.

Though I started watching Gamer the other day because I had wanted to watch it for a while. About 30 minutes in I thought "What the fuck am I watching? Why do I need to be reminded about how female avatars are usually guys? I don't need this noir lighting and weird conversations to understand this famous point." I almost threw up at that point.

Terrible movie.

 

[onewheeled]

Session 9.

I kept hearing such amazing things about the film, but it was just awful. I couldn't care about the flat, badly-acted characters, and the fact that the first hour of the film was devoted to watching them renovate a building and bicker back and forth a bit didn't help. Once the horror part of it actually started, the pacing just felt so wrong, and for most if it, I felt like nothing actually happened.

I get that it was supposed to be "psychological horror", but... no. No, it wasn't.

At least the asylum they were renovating was appropriately creepy. Best part of the film, right there.

 

[Savo]

Hour of the Wolf.

I sorta liked Persona by Ingmar Bergman and thought that him trying a surreal horror film would be a good movie. I was wrong. All those people on the IMDB and Amazon who say that this is an actual horror film need to have their film-buff badge revoked.

Nothing happens for the vast majority of the film, just awkward dialogue from two undeveloped characters for the most part. There is almost no surreal or horror elements to distract from the horrendously bland drama. The actors did a pretty poor job all around, but I'd blame the script more than the incompetency on the actor's part.

There is one great scene toward the end that made me think that Bergman was going to turn the movie around and at least deliver a good finale, but it quickly sank back into the hole of crappy writing.

It's only 88 minutes long and I felt every minute of it. Might even be the worst film I've ever seen, it's got stiff competition though with Hard Candy and The Informant already competing for that spot.

 

[Stasisesque]

The Ring.

I haven't been able to watch any unmarked tapes or DVDs since, and I saw this film at the cinema twelve years ago. It gave me phobias.

 

[Gatx]

Was somehow roped into watching Meet the Spartans in theaters when it was released. I want to cry just thinking about it.

 

[StBishop]

Drive.

It was so damn boring, I just kept waiting for it to get interesting or at least to be more driving oriented. There was about 2 scenes with cool driving (which is the only reason I wanted to watch it) and the rest was shit.

 

[BringBackBuck]

Best of the Best 2
House of Flying Daggers
Hero (Jet Li)
The Lady in Black
The Minus Man (Owen Wilson)
Traitor (Don Cheadle)
The Resident Evil sequels (I actually liked the first one well enough)
American Gangster
Cellular
Avalon
The Contract (Morgan Freeman and John Cusack)

Most of the films on this list put me to sleep (good example is The Minus Man), but some, like Cellular, actually made me angry at how bad they were.

Agree Cellular was shithouse. William H. Macy I expect better of you...

But Hero? I mean the plot wasn't much, the script sucked, acting was poor, the fight scenes were in that over the top chinese style, and yes that fuckwit Tarantino got his name on it for some reason, but christ man that movie was BEAUTIFUL. Seriously, you could take nearly any screen shot from that film and hang it on your wall.

 

[Kermi]

Superbad
Disaster Movie

Just awful, both of them. Not funny, irritating, and the things they were trying to pass off as jokes dragged on way too long.