Sure the security dilemma is a real and very interesting trick. But it’s Russia which fell into that trap. If Russia didn’t have illegitimate desire for the land of their neighbors, and if they hadn’t repeatedly murdered western citizens we’d not be in this situation.
Any look at Russia's treatment of its neighbours would reinforce that argument.
For instance, Russia stripped Moldova of a chunk of territory immediately after the breakup of the USSR, which still has a Russian military presence to this day. Ukraine has repeatedly attempted to confirm a whole series of agreement with Russia, including for instance issues relevant to sovereignty including establishing agreed borders. Russia repeatedly failed to engage and settle many of these issues. As a much smaller country, what this lack of resolution actually gave Ukraine was insecurity and dependence - which was of course Russia's intent. Then there was Russia's invasion of Georgia. Russia has deliberately and consistently used its military might to intimidate and threaten other ex-Soviet states.
This is why the Baltic states are so uncompromising about the threat of Russia: Russia now is little changed from the USSR and Russian Empire before it, and Russia's leaders are steeped in that tradition, where imposing authority with violence is never far away.