"Gaymers" Speak Out On Homophobia

[PirateKing]

I've never actually played an online match because for most of my life I've had terrible internet. But now that I have awesome internet I don't know if I ever will.
I'm not gay, but I did go to public school. Taking any chance to deride anyone or anything for any reason by calling it gay was the favorite past time of several of the morally superior boys.
I love trash talk, but slurs are just pathetic.

 

[oni565]

I just act around gay people like I do around normal people, Unless they do gay pride parades, I just don't like those, YES YOUR GAY NO ONE REALLY CARES

 

[the monopoly guy]

My friend who's gay doesn't like playing on Live anymore because whenever he talks people almost always yell things like "shut the fuck up fag!" (you can really tell, it's kind of a stereotypical gay voice).

 

[LewsTherin]

Your scenario was besides the point anyway. We're talking about what people say in video games.

Do people really say "that chick is fucking hot" in video games?

Most of the time I'm playing it's more like "NERF THAT SPY!"

Seconded. If your playing a game, play the game. Some people are just jackasses, use the ignore/mute function. this is about homophobia over the intraweb and gaming, unless I am mistaken. If people are harassing you in real life, take it to the police. Assault/terrorism is a crime (at least it is here).

This is LewsTherin, reminding you to ignore the stoopidz and not to feed the trolls

 

[Bocaj2000]

"Hey, why'd you shoot me, you jew."
"Shut up, I'm jewish."
"Haha. Kill the kyke!"

I hate Halo.

 

[nova18]

I am not a homophobe or gaybasher, I'm perfectly comfortable around homosexuals, but I also believe that someone's sexual preference is not the kind of thing that A) matters in gaming, B) other players need or want to know. In my experience, most gaybashing I've seen (sans 4Chan) is brought about by some gay person declaring their sexual orientation where they should have just shut up. Not saying they can't be proud of who they are, not saying they shouldn't mention they're gay, but there are places where it's just not appropriate. I don't go around in BF1942 declaring to my whole team that I'm straight. It's not relevant and nobody cares. If you feel like you have to announce to the world what particular gender you like to hump, expect some backlash for it.

Agreed, people have to expect that revealing information about their personal lives to complete strangers will lead to repercussions.
Everyone knows that people on online games can be idiots, thats like giving them ammo and crying when you get shot.

 

[colourcodedchaos]

I am not a homophobe or gaybasher, I'm perfectly comfortable around homosexuals, but I also believe that someone's sexual preference is not the kind of thing that A) matters in gaming, B) other players need or want to know. In my experience, most gaybashing I've seen (sans 4Chan) is brought about by some gay person declaring their sexual orientation where they should have just shut up. Not saying they can't be proud of who they are, not saying they shouldn't mention they're gay, but there are places where it's just not appropriate. I don't go around in BF1942 declaring to my whole team that I'm straight. It's not relevant and nobody cares. If you feel like you have to announce to the world what particular gender you like to hump, expect some backlash for it.

I'm pretty certain this has been said before, but when the hell did you last get beat up in the street by a couple of gay guys/girls just for being a 'breeder'? Answer: most likely never. Gay people are a minority and human history is stuffed to the gills with people beating down on minorities - white supremacists, anti-feminists, &c. The important thing is people fought back.

MLK fought so that his people were viewed as equals by society. Pankhurst, likewise. Are you beginning to see a pattern here? The Stonewall protestors fought back so that their people DIDN'T have to hide, DIDN'T have to shut up about themselves, WEREN'T bombarded with hate and choler simply because they were holding hands with their partner.

Obviously, back then the Internet wasn't even a dot on the horizon. The power of massed, anonymous communication makes it all too easy for the haters to go unpunished for spouting their bile at a societal group that has done nothing except be themselves. Love is not wrong. Why people think otherwise is beyond me. But they do, and it has to stop.

 

[FarleShadow]

The important thing is people fought back.

This is the internet, as overused as that statement is, fighting back is ultimately pointless since there is no real way of punishing people who use that language, so unless we undergo some internet revolution where we all suddenly become respectful, mature individuals, the best course of action is to either ignore it, mute or leave.

I should also probably point out that alot of this hate seems to come from places other than England, which has rampant 'Nobody gives a shit'-ism in gaming.

 

[jebussaves88]

So you're using the gross, juvenile, semi-sexist (for the objectification of women) behaviors of others to justify your need to tell Master Chief that you're gay?

There's a difference between the context of gaming and the context of socializing. In game, I want to discuss strategies over voice/text chat. I really don't want to hear about your personal life. That's not due to homophobia. I don't want to hear about your pets or your favorite color for that matter. I don't care.

In a social context, like at a party? Sure, go ahead and tell me about yourself. It's not like there's a bomb to diffuse. In a game, however, there is one.

Rich coming from someone on a forum. If you don't care about what other people have to say then why are you here? Apart from obvious trolling.
If I want to have a chat to my friends about this sort of thing on Live then why should I have to care what you think about it? If you have a problem with it then take off your mic. The whole point of having a microphone in the first place is for social interaction, making friends and having a good time.
And there's no difference between "the gross, juvenile, semi-sexist behaviors of others" and homosexuals doing the same thing. In both cases, it's the minority making these kinds of statements and it's not fair that you've grouped all homosexuals together.
£100 says if you met me, or played me on 360, you wouldn't know I was bisexual.

I don't know about everyone else, but this is just my personal experience. Whenever I play on Live or even online on PC, I don't particularly want to talk about sex or sexuality. It doesn't enter the equation (even on Dead or Alive :S). And luckily the conversation doesn't usually steer that way. If these are the sort of friends you wish to talk about sexuality to, surely there is another place to do so? Games are a form of escapism (hence The Escapist I believe), a place to escape to to have some fun and be something different to what you are; be this a Spartan, an aging spy, or an army commander. A conversation of sexuality, be it gay or straight, is distracting from the actual context of the game. I hate people saying their blokey "I slept with nine and a half women last week," comments as much as the next socially developed twenty year old, and whilst it does happen, the response is usually fairly hostile. Whilst I understand that homophobic verbal abuse will always be much worse than what that guy will recieve, this just gives more reason to not have to mention sexuality to anyone (unless it's a private server with close friends obviously. Straight or gay, just keep it to yourself, because if you've come to a game to flaunt it, it's just comes across as attention seeking.

 

[Phoenix Arrow]

I don't know about everyone else, but this is just my personal experience. Whenever I play on Live or even online on PC, I don't particularly want to talk about sex or sexuality. It doesn't enter the equation (even on Dead or Alive :S). And luckily the conversation doesn't usually steer that way. If these are the sort of friends you wish to talk about sexuality to, surely there is another place to do so? Games are a form of escapism (hence The Escapist I believe), a place to escape to to have some fun and be something different to what you are; be this a Spartan, an aging spy, or an army commander. A conversation of sexuality, be it gay or straight, is distracting from the actual context of the game. I hate people saying their blokey "I slept with nine and a half women last week," comments as much as the next socially developed twenty year old, and whilst it does happen, the response is usually fairly hostile. Whilst I understand that homophobic verbal abuse will always be much worse than what that guy will recieve, this just gives more reason to not have to mention sexuality to anyone (unless it's a private server with close friends obviously. Straight or gay, just keep it to yourself, because if you've come to a game to flaunt it, it's just comes across as attention seeking.

Oh no, I don't go around flaunting anything. My point was that if I'm playing a game with some friends I'm naturally going to want have a chat with them. I know some people who don't live locally anymore so this is the ideal way to keep in touch. I don't go around in a group chat saying about my sex life but if I say something in passing then there's nothing wrong with that surely?

 

[jebussaves88]

I don't know about everyone else, but this is just my personal experience. Whenever I play on Live or even online on PC, I don't particularly want to talk about sex or sexuality. It doesn't enter the equation (even on Dead or Alive :S). And luckily the conversation doesn't usually steer that way. If these are the sort of friends you wish to talk about sexuality to, surely there is another place to do so? Games are a form of escapism (hence The Escapist I believe), a place to escape to to have some fun and be something different to what you are; be this a Spartan, an aging spy, or an army commander. A conversation of sexuality, be it gay or straight, is distracting from the actual context of the game. I hate people saying their blokey "I slept with nine and a half women last week," comments as much as the next socially developed twenty year old, and whilst it does happen, the response is usually fairly hostile. Whilst I understand that homophobic verbal abuse will always be much worse than what that guy will recieve, this just gives more reason to not have to mention sexuality to anyone (unless it's a private server with close friends obviously. Straight or gay, just keep it to yourself, because if you've come to a game to flaunt it, it's just comes across as attention seeking.

Oh no, I don't go around flaunting anything. My point was that if I'm playing a game with some friends I'm naturally going to want have a chat with them. I know some people who don't live locally anymore so this is the ideal way to keep in touch. I don't go around in a group chat saying about my sex life but if I say something in passing then there's nothing wrong with that surely?

Ah well thats ok.

 

[MikeHax]

This sort of stuff is why I keep my XBL account silver.

 

[meandtheminibar]

Again, if you don't let your orientation become public knowledge, and don't take a generic insult so personally. If they don't know you're gay, then it's just them being ignorant with a word they don't use properly. If you HAVE told them you're gay, well shit, guess that wasn't so smart was it.

So....shut up and get back in the closet then; is that it?

Never said that, so don't put words in my mouth.

Sexuality is a private matter, yes it defines who you are, but it is something that really should only be discussed with you significant other and sometimes very close family matters. Who you fuck, man woman or farm animal, is not a public conversation topic. It has nothing to do with remaining in the closet, and I find a lot of gays don't grasp that. Straight people don't feel this need to go out and announce to strangers that they are straight, so why is it such a big deal that gays feel they must?

Bottom line is that if you go out and publicly announce that you are different from the norm, not saying the difference is good or bad, but you are different and choose to publicly announce or display it, there will be a small group of people who call you out for it. Does anyone here need to know you're gay? Did they ASK if you are gay? If no, then why do you create the problem by announcing something we didn't want to know.

And just an observation on human behavior, but a large chunk of people who ARE homophobic or anti-gay are that way because of how in-your-face some gays are. Gays will never be truly accepted socially by 100% of the population, it's sad but true. But the less flamboyant and gay-prider you are about your preference, the more accepted you will be. I have no issues with gay couples, gay marriage, or gay adoption. I do have issues with gay pride parades, public groping/making out (gay or straight) and any subculture that shoves their ways in your face. So what may come off as homophobia or gay bashing is in fact my distaste for rude behavior, not their sexual preference.

Just out of curiosity, what do you consider "in-your-face"? I'm sure you don't mean it to, but it sounds like you want homos to walk on eggshells around you. Pride parades aren't that different than a Portugeuse heritage festival or a cinco de mayo parade. And public making out is just a question of manners: some people have them, some don't. So what's a really good example of someone rubbing your nose in their business?

 

[FinalHeart95]

I never play Halo unless I am, at the very least, in a party with friends. I can't risk running into some douchebag with a huge ego running his mouth about he "pwns everyone" then he screams "HAXX0R" when you kill him once.

 

[Xaositect]

I have in the past heard the use of "homophobic language" online, though I doubt the actual level of "homophobia" behind it, instead I feel its more just "plain ignorance and stupidity". However, if I did ever hear a person giving an homophobic hate speech online, I can assure homosexual people everywhere my first thought and response would be to tell this young man that its fine for him to be homosexual. Also that he should come to terms with it rather than hide from it behind hatred.

Both because I do feel there is nothing wrong with being homosexual, and because I despise annoying twats.

 

[JohnSmith]

I wonder how much homophobia and similar immature voice bullying would be cut down if the actual age restrictions on games were adhered to. That would mean that in Australia virtually all FPS games would be playable be 15+ thus cutting down the number of 13 year olds on XBL etc.

 

[pqowieurytlaksjdhfg]

When your cyber bullied, they tell you to just close the chat, leave, or block the person(or mute), but in games you cant mute or block the person(in most of the games online that I play anyway) so when someone starts insulting/offending you online in a game, its not really the same thing, and your only option is to leave, but why should you? I mean, just because someones being annoying and insulting you doesn't mean you should HAVE to leave, so there should be a mute button next to the players name so you dont hear them anymore, but in most games I've played, there are not, so I'm not really sure what to do apart from leave (although why should you have to???) ... and I'm not really sure where I'm going with this ... or how to end it ...