"Gaymers" Speak Out On Homophobia

[Nugget]

BECAUSE IT HAS NO PLACE IN POLITE CONVERSATION.

Mm, pointless taboo relating to sex. Honestly, people, these people are people, and I can vouch for them because I'm an arse-bandit myself, and if I'm going to be perfectly honest, yes, we do feel the need to say it more than a heterosexual will outright say he is a heterosexual - because it's always implied. As a previous poster stated, talking about your kids, marriage, "that chick over there", et cetera is basically implying everyone is straight until proven otherwise.

Let me re-iterate.

Everyone is straight until proven otherwise. Unfortunately, this is a fact - and it's the reason a lot of people believe that gay people (such as myself) say we are more often.

 

[Baby Tea]

I have to admit that I only read the first and last page of this thread, only because I knew there would be a ton of ignorant answers from people who I can only assume talk in a southern accent (My apologies to the south). Therefore, please forgive me if what I say has been said already.

I'm going to put it out there (let's see how THIS goes...) that I do not agree with the homosexual life style.
Now before the attacks begin, please hear me out.
I don't agree with it, but I would certainly never 'bash' or attack (verbally or otherwise) homosexual people. I've had plenty of friends who were gay, and I told them how I felt. But we were still friends. I learned a lot about the struggles that homosexuals can have in facing their families, friends, and the public. I'm sorry to say I wasn't always as understanding. But after having friends who are gay and talking with them and arriving at a mutual understanding, I'd have to say that all this hate for homosexuals I see online (this can go for racism too) stems from misinformation, lack of education, and good ol fashioned immaturity.

A no-brainer, ehh?

Also, as a side note: I really disagree the term 'homophobic' to describe someone who doesn't agree with homosexuality. There is no 'phobia' for me. I'm not afraid of you.

 

[GothmogII]

And fag is a cigarette..

And a ****** a sod of earth or peat burned as fuel. See also bundle of sticks. But be that as it may, all of these words are still offensive when used in an offensive way obviously. I wonder though if it would be considered -too- PC to expect that people, anywhere would limit themselves to damn, bastard or bugger etc...although, bugger has it's own connections to homosexuality, but it mostly gets passed over as a quaint little english thing to say.

 

[Phoenix Arrow]

I'm saying that it's a small problem that gays are blowing way out of proportion; as if it's a hate crime to say "fag."

That's NOT the problem though, this is just how it starts.
It starts with childish insults, then it moves into personal insults.
After that is physical violence and when it gets so extreme it turns into a fear that if you go outside you won't be able to get away from it. Best to cut it off before it gets to that stage don't you think?

I'm aware he's been banned but I don't like people saying that these things are no big deal.

 

[Mariena]

It's all about the context as probably has been said before. ... Heh, the amount of times I called my friends "whore" and "*****" even though they totally are not like that. Of course if they were offended by it I would stop

 

[Hybrid_Element]

It's all about the context as probably has been said before. ... Heh, the amount of times I called my friends "whore" and "*****" even though they totally are not like that. Of course if they were offended by it I would stop

Yes, this is true for me as well. I 'insult' my friends all the time with words like 'redneck' and 'you people from the South can't read' (I was born in the South too ^.^ of course she does the same thing to me with ' tranny' and 'Rude Northener'

As long as there's no true hate in it, its okay for me anyway...

 

[Jumplion]

How you could be further from the truth :/

I don't know, what is the truth?

I'm starting to get sick of these answers, they don't answer anything. If I say something wrong in your opinion/fact/whatever explain it to me so I know what the hell it is you're getting on about. It started with Areis_Split saying he was distgusted by my post, but I have no clue what he's "disgusted" about so I don't know what's wrong with it. Don't leave me scratching my head wondering "What's he talking about?", tell me why I'm "further from the truth". It's a forum after all, debate a little.

Sometimes it doesn't hurt to do a little thinking

Very well, let me explain. First of all, you're not going to get the usual "omg a girl the things I would want to do with you" but more like "uh, yeah right. Prove it". At that point it's better to just ignore them. .. you can probably imagine how much more skeptical they become when you tell them you DO have a girlfriend. It's really annoying how some people continuously pester me throughout the game even though I already tried to ignore em in the first few 'stages'.

I mean, it's not like I explicitly told them "I AM A GIRL AND IN LOVE WITH THE SAME SEX!!" but I either I put it subtly and someone actually got it or it just slipped (as said before, partner's voice being picked up when you're gaming or a few too many details accidentally made public)..

Then we have the downright gay-bashers that simply hate you because of your sexual orientation. And of course, as you said, the occasional ('pix plz' and 'cam plz', 'msn plz') but I encounter those far less often than you'd imagine. Usually a firm "No, go away." will do the trick.

I've learned to either ignore such people or don't give them any information on the subject..

Edit: Erhm, minor typo.

I can't "think" about it if I don't know what it is that needs thinking. Usually when you post you probably think that you're the one that's right and the one you're talking to is wrong and vice versa, so I can't find out what's wrong if I think you're wrong of if you think i'm wrong but don't tell me why. I like explaining things, it helps me understand better.

But thankyou for the actual post, I don't have much to add to these conversations anyway, havn't been in an arguey type mood lately.

 

[Azeban]

I'm saying that it's a small problem that gays are blowing way out of proportion; as if it's a hate crime to say "fag."

That's NOT the problem though, this is just how it starts.
It starts with childish insults, then it moves into personal insults.
After that is physical violence and when it gets so extreme it turns into a fear that if you go outside you won't be able to get away from it. Best to cut it off before it gets to that stage don't you think?

I'm aware he's been banned but I don't like people saying that these things are no big deal.

*Prepares to be e-lynched*

I've never understood this type of argument in the context of social change; stop it before it gets worse. Any human belief can snowball into violence, religion does all the time. So what are we supposed to do? Outlaw religion?

I'm pretty moderate in my political views, but not in my view of the first ammendment. All speech, even speech filled with hate, should be legal.

When it crosses into the realm of violence, then it needs to be dealt with. But not before. I find the use of the word ****** tasteless and disgusting. But I'd defend to the death someone's right to say that word.

P.S. Why is it that everyone here is saying ****** but referring to ****** as the n-word? Is the mere mention of the word going to harm anyone?

 

[Phoenix Arrow]

*Prepares to be e-lynched*

I've never understood this type of argument in the context of social change; stop it before it gets worse. Any human belief can snowball into violence, religion does all the time. So what are we supposed to do? Outlaw religion?

I'm pretty moderate in my political views, but not in my view of the first ammendment. All speech, even speech filled with hate, should be legal.

When it crosses into the realm of violence, then it needs to be dealt with. But not before. I find the use of the word ****** tasteless and disgusting. But I'd defend to the death someone's right to say that word.

P.S. Why is it that everyone here is saying ****** but referring to ****** as the n-word? Is the mere mention of the word going to harm anyone?

I'm not saying that isn't the case. People should be free to say what they want if it's in an intellectual way. But it doesn't happen like that. If someone gave me a good argument about why homosexuality is wrong or whatever then I would respect that. Even if though I obviously disgree, I would respect their opinions and reply with what I think. Or if a 12 year old was going "LOL fagit" at me I wouldn't give a crap.

But that ISN'T what happens. It degrades into personal insults and death threats, which isn't right. I mean you wouldn't stand for someone threatening to kill black people over the internet so why should this be any different? Both are just people hating you for what you are.

And my point about stopping it early on was to do with society in general. Make homosexuality more accepted. I mean, when I was at school or PSHE (sex ed. with consequences basically) teacher wouldn't talk about same sex relationships because she said in the past it just turned into childish insults and worse. But surely that makes things worse?

 

[SenseOfTumour]

I remember on Mock the Week, Russell Howard was commenting on a story, these two gays kissing on a plane. Of course some people getting all mad about it, not in front of the children, like its the children that are offended.

Eventually someone comes out with 'stop it, its not natural!' and gets shot down with 'We're FLYING' and goes back to what he was doing

No I have no idea why racism is seen as 'worse' than homophobia, as in the case of ****** being seen as 'worse' than ******. Of course, blacks had the slavery etc. I'm no expert, but as far as I know there's never been some sweatshop with a group of chained homosexuals underground being forced to make scented candles 20 hours a day.

 

[Phoenix Arrow]

I remember on Mock the Week, Russell Howard was commenting on a story, these two gays kissing on a plane. Of course some people getting all mad about it, not in front of the children, like its the children that are offended.

Eventually someone comes out with 'stop it, its not natural!' and gets shot down with 'We're FLYING' and goes back to what he was doing

No I have no idea why racism is seen as 'worse' than homophobia, as in the case of ****** being seen as 'worse' than ******. Of course, blacks had the slavery etc. I'm no expert, but as far as I know there's never been some sweatshop with a group of chained homosexuals underground being forced to make scented candles 20 hours a day.

That was taken from his stand-up show. "Come on Ramon, let's do the bad thing."
Calling someone a ****** is more offensive that calling someone a ******. As I said, I don't know any gay people that would be offended by being called a ******... bar maybe some super-queens. But that it's when it gets personal that it gets out of order. Like, I used to play DOA: Ulitmate on the orignal Xbox with my boyfriend and his friend. She would maybe make a friendly little joke about us, no harm done. Then someone, generally from the North of England or South of the USA, would just lay into us. Admittedly I'm not as thick-skinned as some people, and after this happened countless times (twinned with bullying at school) I started to feel less confident about my sexuality and would hardly talk in case I got shot down.

 

[Phoenix Arrow]

Of the gays i have met i liked all of them except one, and i hated him because he was a stupid emo self-cutting suicide-attempting obnoxiousness-bragging ****!

That's the biggest problem I have with the whole thing. People see one gay/bi guy who's needlessly camp and think we're all like that. There was this guy at my old school that walked into a science class and goes, "OH. My god. Me and had sex in a bush". Later when on to explain it was in the middle of Southampton...
Then everyone said I was going out with him to which I had 3 replies:
1. I had a boyfriend.
2. I have standards.
3. I don't want to catch something.
Honestly, society sucks.

 

[Azeban]

*Prepares to be e-lynched*

I've never understood this type of argument in the context of social change; stop it before it gets worse. Any human belief can snowball into violence, religion does all the time. So what are we supposed to do? Outlaw religion?

I'm pretty moderate in my political views, but not in my view of the first ammendment. All speech, even speech filled with hate, should be legal.

When it crosses into the realm of violence, then it needs to be dealt with. But not before. I find the use of the word ****** tasteless and disgusting. But I'd defend to the death someone's right to say that word.

P.S. Why is it that everyone here is saying ****** but referring to ****** as the n-word? Is the mere mention of the word going to harm anyone?

I'm not saying that isn't the case. People should be free to say what they want if it's in an intellectual way. But it doesn't happen like that. If someone gave me a good argument about why homosexuality is wrong or whatever then I would respect that. Even if though I obviously disgree, I would respect their opinions and reply with what I think. Or if a 12 year old was going "LOL fagit" at me I wouldn't give a crap.

But that ISN'T what happens. It degrades into personal insults and death threats, which isn't right. I mean you wouldn't stand for someone threatening to kill black people over the internet so why should this be any different? Both are just people hating you for what you are.

And my point about stopping it early on was to do with society in general. Make homosexuality more accepted. I mean, when I was at school or PSHE (sex ed. with consequences basically) teacher wouldn't talk about same sex relationships because she said in the past it just turned into childish insults and worse. But surely that makes things worse?

I get your point, but how do you decide which insults are "personal" and therefore unacceptable and which are not.

Allow me to provide an example. I currently go to the University of Pennsylvania. Almost everyone here is a Democrat. The Republicans are constantly made fun of. Is this a personal attack? A group is being ridiculed for its beliefs. Should Republican jokes be illegal?

Death threats are different because they are illegal. When free speech degrades into a death threat, it is no longer protected (and for good reason). When this occurs, just call the police.

 

[Azeban]

Of the gays i have met i liked all of them except one, and i hated him because he was a stupid emo self-cutting suicide-attempting obnoxiousness-bragging ****!

That's the biggest problem I have with the whole thing. People see one gay/bi guy who's needlessly camp and think we're all like that. There was this guy at my old school that walked into a science class and goes, "OH. My god. Me and had sex in a bush". Later when on to explain it was in the middle of Southampton...
Then everyone said I was going out with him to which I had 3 replies:
1. I had a boyfriend.
2. I have standards.
3. I don't want to catch something.
Honestly, society sucks.

In the day to day life of most people, they don't meet many gays. Stereotypes are much easier to form. For example, I know hundreds of people, but only know 3 who are openly gay, and one of those openly gay people is camp. It would be very easy to establish a stereotype in this situation. I think as more people come out of the closet, (people who act more normal), people will stop believing in these stereotypes. The stereotype will still exist, but fewer people will accept it as truth.

 

[SenseOfTumour]

Yea, Louis CK touches on this one, saying about a guy who lived near him, and would pretty much wear nothing but spangly speedos, shades, rollerblades and a music player.

Of course, he'd grin at the sight and the women with him would say'hey dont laugh at him just cos he's gay. 'I'm not, I'm laughing cos he looks fuckin silly!'

I think that's kinda entirely fair, if you're gonna dress up to look utterly ridiculous, then have the thick skin to take it. As the above poster said, there's probly a hundred unnoticably gay guys walked past him that day, thinking' whoa, will you take it easy on the camp pills?'

I'll state again, you shouldn't have to hide your sexuality, but at the same time, going out of your way to let everyone know, probably isn't helping either.

It's like, I don't care what religion anyone is, but that guy shouting as he reads from the bible in the middle of the town pisses me off. I really must buy a games magazine one day and start reading it opposite him, really loudly, to drown him out.

'And the second coming was nigh, yes, the new Warcraft expansion is nearly upon us brothers, and the number of the leets is 80, and 80 was his level number, and we shall -' Hell, even that rubbish is boring me and its on a subject I like.

 

[SenseOfTumour]

Oh nearly forgot, I can state that I hate gays too.

Two of them, one just used to be a friend of a friend and used to pretty much be bitchy at me in every way, guess just took an instant dislike to me, even tho I try to be friendly to everyone until I'm proved that I'm wasting my time, and the other was a customer who kept returning gay porn at the store because it wasnt good enough.

You live in Britain, stop buying porn at my store, you wont see anything, there's laws against even showing an erect penis. Eventually I even suggested he try buying from a specialist or online, just to stop him coming back and wasting both of our time.

The other ones I've met tho, no problem at all

The tons I've met and didn't even know, well, couldn't tell ya, I didn't know.

Guess I'm just saying its fine to hate a gay man, so long as 'gay' isn't the reason.

God knows, after working in retail, I long since dropped hating people for silly stuff like colour, race, gender, age, etc, when the all encompassing 'stupid' is so much more important.

 

[UsefulPlayer 1]

People still get their feelings hurt in online games? Seriously?

Wtf? I though everyone realized people are assholes and you're probably going to get bashed online. It doesn't matter who or what you are.

But of course if you stick your opinions in peoples faces then your in for toasting.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

God knows, after working in retail, I long since dropped hating people for silly stuff like colour, race, gender, age, etc, when the all encompassing 'stupid' is so much more important.

Why be stupid-ist? In retail I just hate everyone.

 

[SenseOfTumour]

Heh, the rare people who can string a sentence together I liked, and could even inflict my opinions on in a 'Hey, if you like those guys, you should give this band a go, they're new!'