Geeky jokes
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That was a really poorly written version of that poem. Johnny was a chemist's son, now Johnny was no more. What he thought was H2O was H2SO4.Twilight_guy said:
One I wrote for a recent post to a word a day forum I frequent is more a wordy pun:
Johnny was a smart young lad,
Now Johnny's face is red.
When asked what five parts of twelve was called,
A 'quincunx,' Johnny said.
A gasp was heard by teacher dear,
Who gave not silent grace.
Poor Johnny, accused of cussing
Was slapped across the face!
This is ridiculously nerdy, so get ready...
Why do mathematicians get confused between Halloween and Christmas?
Because OCT31 = DEC25
An the explanation for all you non-mathematicians out there:
Why do mathematicians get confused between Halloween and Christmas?
Because OCT31 = DEC25
An the explanation for all you non-mathematicians out there:
31 in base 8 (OCT) is equal to 25 in base 10 (DEC)
Not as much a juke, but more like a math-proved fact.
Girls require time and money => Girls = time x money
Time is money => Girls = money x money = money squared
Money is the root of all evil => Girls = the root of (evil squared) = evil
So fellow guys, be careful
(works better when you can write the square and root symbols, but comes off alright like this)
Girls require time and money => Girls = time x money
Time is money => Girls = money x money = money squared
Money is the root of all evil => Girls = the root of (evil squared) = evil
So fellow guys, be careful
(works better when you can write the square and root symbols, but comes off alright like this)
Congratulations, you are not a programmer.Agayek said:Gitsnik said:And those who don't know how to count. (Really geeky: 0 is a number, thus 0 is actually counted - work with array's some time, position 0 is the 1st position in the array - binary 00000010 is actually the 3rd number 00000000, 00000001, 00000010 etc.).Trumpkin said:There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
I don't get that maths joke at all!
Still, it's funnier if you don't say there are 1 kinds of people in the world, so we won't hold it against anyone.
00000010 is still a 2 in decimal...
Another one (this one a quote):
Sten Drescher said:
Fairly certain I am. Binary 10 is Decimal 2. It may be the 3rd number in the sequence of binary numbers, but it is still Decimal 2.Gitsnik said:Congratulations, you are not a programmer.Agayek said:Gitsnik said:And those who don't know how to count. (Really geeky: 0 is a number, thus 0 is actually counted - work with array's some time, position 0 is the 1st position in the array - binary 00000010 is actually the 3rd number 00000000, 00000001, 00000010 etc.).Trumpkin said:There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
I don't get that maths joke at all
Still, it's funnier if you don't say there are 1 kinds of people in the world, so we won't hold it against anyone.
00000010 is still a 2 in decimal...
And on topic,
Why do programmers all agree that Halloween and Christmas are the same thing?
Because Oct 31 = Dec 25
WTF? The binary joke means that 10 in binary is actually two, not the third number?
So unless you understand binary, you don't get it. Which obviously no one else does.
So unless you understand binary, you don't get it. Which obviously no one else does.
indeed it is!Agayek said:Gitsnik said:And those who don't know how to count. (Really geeky: 0 is a number, thus 0 is actually counted - work with array's some time, position 0 is the 1st position in the array - binary 00000010 is actually the 3rd number 00000000, 00000001, 00000010 etc.).Trumpkin said:There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
I don't get that maths joke at all
Still, it's funnier if you don't say there are 1 kinds of people in the world, so we won't hold it against anyone.
00000010 is still a 2 in decimal...
and in a display of laziness i only bothered with Wikipedia.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Binary_numeral_system#Counting_in_binary
A doctor, a priest and an engineer are all playing golf, when they find themselves stuck behind a really slow-moving group. They call the groundskeeper to complain. "I've never seen such inept golf," they tell him, "Can you do something?"
The groundskeeper replies, "I'm sorry for the inconvenience, I hope you understand; those are three firefighters who lost their eyesight while saving the clubhouse."
This causes a short awkward pause in the group. Finally the doctor speaks up.
"That's just awful, I'm going to talk to some of my colleagues in optometry and see if there's anything I can do to help."
The priest adds: "I feel just terrible, I'm going to talk to my congregation and see if I can't get a collection together for them."
Finally the engineer speaks up and says, "Why can't they just play at night?"
EDIT: Also, What's the difference between mechanical and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.
The groundskeeper replies, "I'm sorry for the inconvenience, I hope you understand; those are three firefighters who lost their eyesight while saving the clubhouse."
This causes a short awkward pause in the group. Finally the doctor speaks up.
"That's just awful, I'm going to talk to some of my colleagues in optometry and see if there's anything I can do to help."
The priest adds: "I feel just terrible, I'm going to talk to my congregation and see if I can't get a collection together for them."
Finally the engineer speaks up and says, "Why can't they just play at night?"
EDIT: Also, What's the difference between mechanical and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.
I tell it the way my chemistry teacher told it. I respect him far too much to ever tell it any other way. I corrected my punctuation though.Nerdfury said: