"Get a life!"

[Jodah]

I usually just stop taking someone seriously when they use that term, to be honest. As far as I'm concerned, if you're living, breathing and generally enjoying yourself however you see fit, then you have a life. And it is pretty fucking stupid for other people to claim otherwise.

The only time I could imagine such a term being remotely accurate, would be to describe Josef Fritzl's daughter during her imprisonment or someone who has a life sentence behind bars et cetera, but to say someone has no life because they don't go outside? Or because they'd rather play a video game rather than talk to people is just downright idiotic.

This. Nothing makes one happy life better than another happy life. Nothing says someone who goes to bars and has sex with random jerks has a better life than someone who plays video games with friends.

 

[Relish in Chaos]

I just don't really take people seriously when they say, "Get a life". It's entirely subjective what it means to "get a life".

However, I'm living a pretty dull, routine and unfulfilling life at the moment, stuck in a cycle of constant laptopping, exams, emptiness and depression. The only hope I have is that this CBT can work and "fix" me, because the amount of problems I have is seriously hindering my enjoyment of, well, anything. And I'm only 16. How pathetic.

 

[Arduras]

Heard it many a time, but to each their own reasons for the lifestyle they choose,
I know a fair few people that live as introverts due to a phobia, injury, worklife, etc, and its not an issue for them, they (usually) have everything they want or need and lead happy lives.
Hell, some people are BORN to be introverts, as a study we conducted during my basic training during my stint in the forces; and those people tend to be the better of the two, able to lead their lives with more 'effective results'.

Me personally, I don't go out and drink with my old mates, its draining a waste and to me, they seem not to be having as much fun as I do with my small cadre of close mates that'll play cards, have a BBQ, goto the gym and generally do things that people consider 'stupid, lifeless things'.

I enjoy myself most days, can half of the people that say to me "Get A Life!" say the same? no

Operation Rant: Complete

 

[ElPatron]

Someone uses "get a life" on any kind of online interaction...

>I have girlfriend
>go to gym
>therefore I have a life

Sometimes the kind of replies I see piss me off more than people who use the "get a life" comeback. Like the one above.

That reply is so overused and so illogical that makes me want to brandish a Final Fantasy-sized sword and cut down people in the street.

EDIT: after thinking for a while, I think nobody ever told me that. Advantages of not talking about myself to people.

EDIT2: and I share with you the opinion that the definition of fun does not imply brown-outs, black-outs and doing humiliating things.

 

[VonKlaw]

Threads like this make me pretty freaking glad I have parents who appreciate that going out to get pissed every night you can isn't the best thing ever.

I would slip into a rant about "Do whatever the hell you want aslong as it doesn't hurt anyone and you can afford it" but lots of people have pretty much summed that up already.

 

[Easton Dark]

My life's fine I think.

Sitting in front of my laptop all day has gotten me:

1. Gaming

2. Relationships/Friends

3. Knowledge

4. Entertainment

So really, I'm all set. Except for food. And my body's pretty nice too.

 

[Mayhaps]

Okay, here we go.
Social isolation is harmful. There's no real substitute for real physical interaction. Not even video chatting. Not saying forums such as this one aren't great, they are.

A common defense for us geeks is that alcohol is bad for you and we're not out smashing windows. But it's just as shallow as people calling gaming is a one way road to social isolation.

Gaming makes you happy? That's great, but if you're doing it all the time, don't pretend you're not missing out on other things. You are, and you know it.

As for the phrase 'get a life'. I mostly hear it from people playing the same game as me, but are not as good.

 

[wooty]

My mum always said to me that having a life was to not listen to people think about you, do the opposite of everyone else and not be a sheep. I guess she was right, not living in the shadow of peer pressure built up my confidence quite a bit.

Also on the social side of "having a life", I would have a better one if my mates would "get a life" outside of games fucking workshop and world of wanks........which is pretty ironic whichever way you slice it.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

It means you don't dick around and be a jackass, I guess.
Either that, or they assume you just spend your entire time doing ONE thing that they don't, so they think they're better than you. Regardless, I laugh my ass off whenever I'm told that.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

Its a dicey thing to say. Since my shit results made my future plans to be a doctor come into sway ive been studying. Hard. I make time for my girlfriend and an hour of games a day. Other than that its notes and notes and notes. Do i have a life? Some would say no. But im gonna be a doctor if i do this. THATS a life. Its a tradeoff really. "Get a life NOW" or "get a life in general"?

 

[ElPatron]

A common defense for us geeks is that alcohol is bad for you and we're not out smashing windows. But it's just as shallow as people calling gaming is a one way road to social isolation.

It is not shallow.

People enjoy hiking. Rock climbing. Shooting. Downhill. Motocross. Camping. Heck, even paintball or airsoft.

In my opinion, perfect Saturday morning activities. They don't imply going out for drinking or anything.

Yet, you won't say that anyone doing these activities has "no life", even if they chose to stay at home Friday night playing videogames.

Going out at night is not the only alternative, brah. A lot of us "hate" social interaction, but let's forget these quirks found among Escapists.

But you can hardly call "going out" social interaction these days. Not with people tweeting/on facebook all the time. Not with the only excuse to be there is having drinks. Shit, I drink plenty of water during the day, I ain't thirsty at night and I won't tolerate "minimum consumption".

 

[omega 616]

Its a dicey thing to say. Since my shit results made my future plans to be a doctor come into sway ive been studying. Hard. I make time for my girlfriend and an hour of games a day. Other than that its notes and notes and notes. Do i have a life? Some would say no. But im gonna be a doctor if i do this. THATS a life. Its a tradeoff really. "Get a life NOW" or "get a life in general"?

Hey dude, I got this thing on my foot ... did you just think "for fucks sake!"?

I have seen enough scrubs and house to know being a doc would be a *****, from internet qualified doctor/patients to being on call.

Being on call I would imagine to be a life destroyer, being called in at the wrong time etc

Captcha: million dollars ... solve media you teasing bastard!

 

[Fayathon]

I would get a life, but they fairly well did away with that system.

OT: I don't get told that as much considering I go out more often and socialize (read: doing the same shit at someone else's house) so it's all good in my book. Also what is the point of "getting a life" if it doesn't make you happy? Granted bills to pay and shit like that, but free time is your time, use it how you see fit, and to hell with anyone that tells you you're wasting your time, it's yours to waste.

 

[Duck Sandwich]

In my extensive research I have found that 'get a life' means one thing and one thing only.

'You don't do exactly the same things that I do with the same people and enjoyed to the same degree, so I feel that because you are different obviously you are not as awesome as I am. I don't just want you to get 'A' life, I want you to emulate 'MY' life, thus validating my own lifestyle choices which I am not entirely certain over. In fact I think I may have made some mistakes, but to admit this would be to admit that I am not perfect and I am too much of an egotist to realise this.'

I understand this is a lengthy translation, but sadly it is like many other foreign words. It doesn't translate well from douchebag into regular English.

Well said. I was considered antisocial in college, not because I stayed at home all the time (I spent a good chunk of my college years doing things like boxing and rock climbing), but because I didn't party. And it's not as though I didn't give it a shot. I went to the occasional pub now and again, but I always found myself getting bored after dancing (after having 0-2 drinks) for an hour, and I almost always overheard some random people yapping about how some douchebag tried to start a fight/groped someone else's girlfriend/vomited all over the floor.

 

[LordFisheh]

It's always tempting when someone offers a magic 'right way' of living. All you have to do is follow The Rules and you get all the support and validation you'll ever need. as far as I'm concerned, if you can't prove that 'not having a life' is morally despicable then it's absolutely fine, just as if you can't prove that there's a deity then I won't believe in it.

Easy answers are the problem here, and hopefully people will one day stop replacing the hard truth that there is no 'right way' with the easy lie that all you have to do is act like X to be acceptable.

Why can't we just let people do as they please? If they're unhappy deep down, then let them be unhappy - that's their own lookout, not mine or yours. If there's an underlying mental disorder or what have you, again, that's for medical professionals and people themselves to recognise, not for us to slap as a label on people too far from what we choose.

But instead we have to criticise them, tell them that they're living wrong, that they aren't happy even though they think they are, and that they should behave like us.

People like different things. That's... all there is to it.

Its about having friends and doing things with them.

As reasonable as you're being, this is exactly what I mean. 'It' is about absolutely nothing. No divine purpose. No obligation from birth. No boxes to tick before you're allowed to be Truly Happy.

 

[cookyy2k]

I've heard this many a time from low life, perpetually unemployed (by choice), alcoholic, druggies. As if that is some kind of exiting life, that sounds like hell to me.

 

[omega 616]

I hear this phrase get thrown around a lot in our little culture but what does this or it's opposite phrase "you no lifer!" mean to you?

I think it means you don't "socialize" enough, by which I mean "you don't get drunk and do stupid shit" enough. Is it really that bad not to have a social life?

I don't have a social life, if I am not doing my few hours of voluntary work then I am sat alone in my flat gaming, youtube-ing, job searching or forum-ing.

So what are your thoughts on what is it to have a life, is it bad not to have a social life and what ever else.

Well...

It totally depends. Are you happy? Or are you gaming to escape. Cause when people are gaming to escape their boring lives then yeah, the no lifer term fits. And the calls for you to get a life ALSO fit. Its harsh but true.

I mean, I wish I had more of a life outside of gaming. But I messed up and I go to college with people who are, on average, 8 years older than me. With kids and shit. Outside of college and getting the occasional beer with them, I have no social life. At all. And I miss the life I used to lead.

It is not all about getting drunk and being an idiot. Lots of people think it is. It is a very good defense mechanism to go down that road and be SUPERIOR to other people because you dont need to "get drunk and do stupid shit" to have a life. You just need to do something outside of work/college or madness starts to set in.

Well, that is my view anyway.

In short?

If someone calls you a no lifer or says get a life simply because you are a gamer, ignore them. I used to have a life outside of gaming (Steady relationship + Work life + Good circle of friends that I would hang around with regularly) and get told I had no life simply because when I was alone I would game.

But if someone says get a life and you realise that outside of college/work all you do is game, well... Then get a life. Seriously. So many gamers get all defensive but humans are SOCIAL CREATURES. We NEED other people or we start to get depressed and whatnot. It is how we are built. By so many gamers I mean... Well, just about everyone I have ever met that has described themselves as a gamer.

Having a life is not about boozing and boning. Its about being happy and having friends. It is about having a reason to leave the house on the weekends. And, well...

If you spend the entire weekend in because "I am not the kind of guy that gets drunk, that is beneath me, it is pathetic, it is much more productive to play an MMO with a bunch of guys I have never met and get me that Sword Of Hitting Things Really Hard so in next weeks raid I can get the Sword of Really Hitting things Really Hard." well, maybe its about time you made some friends. Bring them round and play boardgames. Watch Firefly. Start up a DnD campaign. Start up a Warhammer collection, hang around at the local games workshop... To say it again, it is not about getting drunk and all that crap.

Its about having friends and doing things with them. No matter how nerdy, if you have friends and you do shit with them, you have a life. But if you don't and your image of a good weekend is 18 hours of Skyrim on Saturday followed by 18 hours of WoW on Sunday...

Then get a fucking life.

What about if I have more fun having 18 hours of skyrim followed by 18 hours of wow and have way more fun than "play boardgames. Watch Firefly. Start up a DnD campaign. Start up a Warhammer collection, hang around at the local games workshop"? 'cos I have to be honest, that sounds really boring?

I just don't have as much fun around people as I do when I am alone. When I am alone I can instantly go from playing battlefield to this site and then to call of duty at the drop of a hat, with friends I have to negotiate everything or do what they want to do.

If they are watching firefly but you hate it or get bored 10 minutes in and want to watch family guy, you can't but I can.

People don't have to be social animals, we all say "all people are different" but it's not ok not to like being around other people for hours at a time?

 

[Vexik]

Now I remember why I stopped reading forum posts... they make me feel old. All these vitriolic posts about partiers and drinkers remind me of being young and defensive and full of self-righteousness.

Getting a life, when I use it, means a rounded existence. I've got more nerd cred than a d20 labelled in binary, and I grew up as insular and protected as I could be. I needed to get a life! As time wore on, I began talking to people I wasn't introduced to and who clearly shared few if any interests with me. I went to parties - of various kinds - and tried to experience many different things. Now I've got plenty going on in many different ways, and I don't think anyone would tell me to get a life just because I play video games - but that's because I do a lot of other things, too.

Variety is the spice of life, and that holds no truer than when applied to experiences. Spice it up, Escapists!

 

[II2]

"I had one. It was horrible. I'm much happier now."

 

[dark-mortality]

"I had one. It was horrible. I'm much happier now."

Hear hear!

OT: "Get a life!"... *Checks pulse, heartbeat, that I breathe, that I can sense stuff.*... Welp, from my totally not-so scientific study, I can conclude that I am alive, which, in a sense, means I have a life, shallow as it may be...

Captcha: Dear cookie... Nomnomnom