Girl gamers and their boy issues.

[MoNKeyYy]

I'm a guy, and I've only ever found like, a few girls that are super into gaming. But as has already been said here, I think the stigma exists on both sides of the gender spectrum. Ha, a problem I think you get that we don't though is that you tend to get lumped in with the "Ooh, like boys, I'm playing COD teehee, can I suck your dick?" group. I've seen a loooot of those in my limited time on this planet. Also men are stupid. REALLY stupid. And generally tend to be assholes. I've noticed that when girls display intelligence or really positive qualities (or both) guys get intimidated. Especially at parties. Did I mention men are stupid?

My problem is that there IS still stigma about being a female gamer. I used to laugh when girls would say that they wouldn't go on voice chat online for fear of hearing "tits or gtfo'... then I had it happen. (And I apparently sound like an 8 year old boy on voice). There shouldn't be gender separation. Girls can game, so can guys. We should be a happy community. Am I right?

Italics Don't get discouraged, it's not that you sound like an 8 year old boy, it's that 8 year old boys sound like girls. The latter tends to be more common than the former, so people make assumptions.

Bold I was about to post this then I realized how good your post is at proving my point. Men are stupid. Monumentally so.

 

[arsenicCatnip]

...and would tell you to refrain from online dating, it never works!

I met my husband on a message board for Command & Conquer, of all places, back in 2002. We played City of Heroes together, then moved on to World of WarCraft. He proposed to me in 2007. We're still together and going strong.

So, to the OP, disregard the text I quoted up top.

Way to go!

I'll also tell you to disregard that quote. I met my boyfriend through Steam (through a friend, but we were in the same gaming group). We started talking and he openly admitted he was a gamer, and liked the fact that I am too. I moved cross-country to be with him, and we spend a lot of evenings playing PS2 or PC games together.

 

[Tuesday Night Fever]

I said "Online dating" not "Online Gaming". Online gaming works! And you're an example. But I'm talking about it for the perspective of young single girls looking for a guy. Online dating when you're someone like that isn't going to work well.

Oh, trust me, it was online dating. I was in North Carolina, he was in New Hampshire.

 

[Nalfen]

This is silly, girls don't exist, there are guys, 13 year old boys pretending to be girls, and anyone under 18 is FBI

OT: I've been gaming since I was about 3, watching some anime/manga since i was 7, playing D&D since I was 9, and started 3d modeling at 18, two years later still working on that, so I know my geek cred is strong

I've met some gamer girls, but only online and most of them live on the west coast while I am stuck in the middle of no where (aka Midwest). The few gamer girls I knew in high school were either taken or uninterested and in college it's pretty much they're all taken. I know what most of you are talking about with the "I'm a girl playing video games and therefore special" we all find online. From my experiences that's about as frequent as any other annoying form of troll video game player out there.

Most of the gamer girls I do know are taken or are lesbians with the occasional single one but the like, 3 I've met in person that were single seem to be interested in the jock type so meh. I can't count the amount of "you're a great guy but..." variations I've gotten but it's never been about them playing video games to me, just they tend to be nicer than most other girls (went to a sports heavy high school). At this point I just want to meet some gamer girls in person just to hang out with cause while talking with them online is fine and all it'd just be nice to have some personal interactions with the opposite gender once in a while.

Plus me being a ginger (I say I'm a day walker but whatever) and having no soul could be part of the problem as my friends are all quick to remind me 0u0 <=== it's a smile

 

[BanicRhys]

Go to some sort or gaming expo, you should be able to find at least one guy that meets your standards amongst all the men who will be trying to pick you up.

Also, why don't I know any girls like the OP?

 

[Tuesday Night Fever]

"But I'm talking about it for the perspective of young single girls looking for a guy. Online dating when you're someone like that isn't going to work well."

Implying an assumption that I wasn't looking, and that I wasn't young. Wrong on both counts. Worked out just fine.

I could play the assumption game too, about you and your opposition to seeking soulmates on the internet, but I'm not going to. Just pointing out to the OP that I find your advice to be fairly bad, as it can, in fact, be done.

 

[TheTim]

Maybe you could not talk about videogames at all?

 

[arsenicCatnip]

I'm a guy, and I've only ever found like, a few girls that are super into gaming. But as has already been said here, I think the stigma exists on both sides of the gender spectrum. Ha, a problem I think you get that we don't though is that you tend to get lumped in with the "Ooh, like boys, I'm playing COD teehee, can I suck your dick?" group. I've seen a loooot of those in my limited time on this planet. Also men are stupid. REALLY stupid. And generally tend to be assholes. I've noticed that when girls display intelligence or really positive qualities (or both) guys get intimidated. Especially at parties. Did I mention men are stupid?

My problem is that there IS still stigma about being a female gamer. I used to laugh when girls would say that they wouldn't go on voice chat online for fear of hearing "tits or gtfo'... then I had it happen. (And I apparently sound like an 8 year old boy on voice). There shouldn't be gender separation. Girls can game, so can guys. We should be a happy community. Am I right?

Italics Don't get discouraged, it's not that you sound like an 8 year old boy, it's that 8 year old boys sound like girls. The latter tends to be more common than the former, so people make assumptions.

Bold I was about to post this then I realized how good your post is at proving my point. Men are stupid. Monumentally so.

I won't say all men are stupid, but I will agree that a lot of them are immature, especially when women are involved. Then again, a lot of women are vapid and shallow too. Seems to balance out there.

Girl: Tee hee I play boy games, I'm super cool and special.
Guy: Tits or gtfo girl.

And thus the cycle continues.

 

[Betancore]

So yeah. I noticed there are bizarrely many topics about gamers(male) having problems with getting girls.

Just wanted to say it's not all that easy for girls either. (sadly)
I'm a gamer girl.. And yeah for me that hasn't worked out at all. Maybe it's just the lack of male gamers in my environment. But I wonder if more girls have been experiencing this problem.

For instance you're at a party talking to a nice guy... And realize you've ended up talking about Mass Effect. And the guy is like: Riiiiight... *backs off*
It's funny how non gaming guys are just as freaked out as girls... Oh well. Just curious after thoughts, and if more girls have experienced this problem.

I guess I have a similar and dissimilar problem - I don't have much of a problem talking to guys about games, but that in itself is also a problem. "Oh, you play computer games? Awesome! Let's talk about games and be friends!" Result? Me = forever alone. Just because I play games doesn't mean I'm a lesbian, or that you can't find me sexually attractive. Fair enough if you just don't like me that way anyway.

That being said, I suppose all you can do is avoid talking about games to non-gaming guys? I've only ever dated other gamers to be honest. People are difficult anyway, male or female, so even if the whole gaming aspect wasn't a factor, I would still be having problems.

 

[MorsePacific]

Personally, as a guy forced to identify as a gamer because labels work like that, have literally no interest in ever dating a girl who plays games. I tried it once and something about that particular girl made me swear off any girl who identifies as a gamer.

 

[AngryFrenchCanadian]

Wait, are you telling me this is something that actually happens?

OH.

MY.

GOD.

 

[Shikua]

I'm a nerdy as fuck genderfluid person, and I just happen to have shit luck when it comes to finding potential romantic and sexual partners. Whenever I find someone amazing, they end up being taken, straight, lesbian, or from a far-away place XP

 

[arsenicCatnip]

Wait, are you telling me this is something that actually happens?

OH.

MY.

GOD.

...I am in tears from laughing right now. Oh my god.

(Also, I'm usually the one saying the lines in the first panel. Damn it, 2Fort is NOT a frag map! Cap the intel!)

 

[AnkaraTheFallen]

Could be worse. Could be a girl gamer who is also into girls. Much smaller pool than either gender of straight gamers has to deal with.

Lol, it really is XD

But as said by others, it's hard in general to find others who enjoy gaming as well, full stop. It's not as large a community as it seems at times, and a lot of people who play games wont identify as a 'gamer' because it has the stereotypical image of being geeky/nerdy.

But you don't both need to be interested in games to still talk about them, my gf almost never played games before we went out, and now she plays them almost as much as me because, in her own words's, she wanted to join in with that part of my life ^.^

 

[whtkid6969]

I know exactly what you mean. I mean, I'm a guy, but i still get it. I was at my friends party once, and even after being warned not to go on and talk about games by him, i found myself talking to a group of people about Oblivion. after half the people immediatly left the conversation for fear of catching the geek, one girl seemed to be paying a lot of attention to what i was saying. By the end of the party me and her were talking about many other games as well, like mass effect and (of course the only game she previously heard of) Halo. She asked me where i lived, and i showed her because it was just down the block. She invited herself in, and demanded (the same way my dog demands me to give her a peace of steak) that I show her how to play the game. 5 hours later, my mother (getting ready from work) walks into my room because she hears giggling and finds me sleeping DEEPLY and the girl playing Oblivion. Now this would have been a much smaller issue if we weren't both naked... and that's how I met the girl I want to marry. Girl's that not only enjoy gaming with me but can also swing in the info and lingo are quite possibly god's gift to gamers. So, On Topic, you'll find yourself having much less relationship problems if you try and find a guy who shares intrests with you, and like playing what you like.

 

[GraveeKing]

You should see my Sister - she scares even me sometimes and I swear to god her laugh is from the fable series.... Thank god this boyfriend plays the same console as her.

This is why I look about online to find people, chances are they'll have similar interests!

 

[PhiMed]

So yeah. I noticed there are bizarrely many topics about gamers(male) having problems with getting girls.

Just wanted to say it's not all that easy for girls either. (sadly)
I'm a gamer girl.. And yeah for me that hasn't worked out at all. Maybe it's just the lack of male gamers in my environment. But I wonder if more girls have been experiencing this problem.

For instance you're at a party talking to a nice guy... And realize you've ended up talking about Mass Effect. And the guy is like: Riiiiight... *backs off*
It's funny how non gaming guys are just as freaked out as girls... Oh well. Just curious after thoughts, and if more girls have experienced this problem.

If he doesn't play games, then he probably doesn't want to talk about Mass Effect. If you didn't pick up on that, then he probably wondered, correctly, why you continued to talk about it.

There are many reasons there aren't more threads about women experiencing this phenomenon.

First, there are fewer hardcore female gamers. They exist, but they're not as numerous as their male counterparts.

Second, men are much more likely to suffer through a boring conversation if they think they'll get to sleep with a woman than women are to do the same with a man. For women, conversation is a key aspect of attractiveness. For men, a woman is allowed to be a certain level of boring/stupid/offensive/crazy as long as they're hot. Yes, I know. We're pigs. We've established that.

Third, most societies expect men to make the first move. Thus, if a woman is in a conversation with a man at a party, she was probably approached, and the guy has pretty much already decided that he finds the woman attractive. If a guy is in a conversation with a woman at a party, he approached her, and he has no idea whether she finds him attractive or not. If he's a shut-in gamer, he's probably not helping himself in the "riveting conversation" department. And so he fails. Women pretty much just have to nod their head and laugh at jokes at the appropriate time if they're interested in a guy. Guys have to impress.

These are all general statements, of course, and in no way encompass all experiences of the human collective.

I'm just curious, though. Did you ask him whether he plays games and whether he'd heard about the Mass Effect franchise before you started talking about it? Because if not, then what possessed you to talk about it until you weirded him out? If I approached a girl and she started talking about a media franchise about which I had no idea, I'd sit there and listen and ask questions for a while before I bolted. You must've gone on for a bit.