Grand Theft Auto 5 Review - People Suck

[AmrasCalmacil]

3.5 WTF, even Polygon gave it a 9.5. I'm gonna have to actually read it now.

Wow, Polygon must have really loved GTA V if they gave it 9.5 out of 5 stars.

I think I see what bothered Greg, and it makes a lot of sense if he enjoyed the story less because of it.

How are we meant to care at all about anything that happens to these characters when they are, at their core, a bunch of sociopaths doing it out of no more motivation than money? Even Niko, who I found an intolerable protagonist had some motivations, though it was always a bit Count of Monte Cristo.

Stories, whether film, book, or video game, require us to have at least some care about what happens to the characters. I'm not quite sure about anyone else, but if I find a character and their actions utterly reprehensible, then I don't much care what happens for them, and a vital element is lost from the story.

That doesn't mean GTA V is a bad game, by any stretch, even with the horrors of Yoga and Bike Riding, it still looks and sounds like an amazing game, I'm looking forward to making my own judgements whenever it comes to PC/Whenever I cave and get it on Xbox, and hey, maybe I'll find something I like about the characters. Judging by all the trailers I've seen, I doubt it, but hey, what are they going to do? Add John Marston to the game?

There's always GTA Online anyway, which I imagine will eat up a lot of my time. Multiplayer with all the features of the singleplayer open world is what I've wanted Rockstar to do for the longest time.

 

[Cyrax987]

Just one thing I forgot to add: So "killing not being fun but actually unpleasant" is NOT pushing the boundaries of video-games?

Are you saying that we should STRIVE for mindless run-and-gun violence in video-games instead of an immersive experience with a narrative that actually gives killing some wheight?

The game doesn't give killing any weight, unfortunately. I wish it did. I wish there was any remorse displayed by the characters. Instead you get mindless screaming and lame quips.

You mean like every GTA with a talking protagonist? Tommy, CJ, Niko, Johnny, and Luis all made remarks about killing people and it wasn't "Oh I'm so sorry for doing this I didn't mean it"

It honestly comes off as a publicity review to garner more page views to the site. I've been a long time fan of the escapist and I'm still going to come to the site because I'm not going to let one review deter me away. But to spout about all of it's technical achievements on a PRODUCT which is the point of a review for any good/service but because you don't agree with a character's morals you slap it down a notch.

Just seems very petty and intentional for an outcry.

 

[willzino]

I find it amusing that people like to jump on a game reviewer because he has an opinion on something that A: Isn't the same as everyone else, and B: Is for something that people haven't even played either. How do you all know that your opinion won't be the same as Greg's? How about you play the actual game before you just dismiss the guy's review for being wrong and a "troll wannabee that wants to get himself noticed on metacritic"?

Amazon and other retailers have been shipping the game early. You'll find many of us have infact played.

 

[Adultratedhydra]

I never said they were bad series. I have no opinion of Anything past Halo Reach and i choose to not acknowledge anything past Cod 5. But whenever someone does less than slobber all over them legions of jilted fans come out and call "OH YOUR JUST BEING EDGY".

You choose not to acknowledge it? Why? That whole phrase insinuates that you're being pompous about video games haha. I'm sorry but it really does lol...

Its as simple as "I dont have anything nice to say about them so i say nothing." Hence i have no opinion of the games since i dont play them. Theres nothing wrong with that.

Besides, no opinion is better than "COD/HALO IS GOOD" "NO ITS NOT" arguments all over the place

 

[lacktheknack]

If someone unironically brings up the DA2 review, I will headslam them until they understand the concept of "Not Much Is Objective In Game Reviewing God Dammit".

I think you better commence that head-slamming. =P

YEP!

Well, I guess the amazing quality of Dragon Age 2 has spoiled all other video games for you.

NOT!



MUCH!



IS OBJECTIVE!



IN GAME REVIEWING!



GOD!



DAMMIT!





... I feel better. Thanks.

 

[Doclector]

So...no puckish rogues here?

Honestly, that kinda sounds interesting. To be forced into the role of characters who are utterly evil and have no reason for being so other than just being terrible people.

But I wasn't planning on getting it at launch, and that doesn't change my decision. Still, it'll be interesting to see what people make of it if the characters really are as morally bankrupt as you say.

 

[Ecliptica Wolf]

Its as simple as "I dont have anything nice to say about them so i say nothing." Hence i have no opinion of the games since i dont play them. Theres nothing wrong with that.

Fair enough, but stating that you don't acknowledge them is completely different to what you just said. That would be like me saying I don't acknowledge Stalin because I have nothing nice to say about him. It just doesn't work...

 

[Racecarlock]

"It's certainly fun to be the bad guy sometimes, but only buy Grand Theft Auto V if you're prepared to play as characters with no justifiable motivation for doing awful things to people."

As if people don't play those already when they start running pedestrians down. I would say the protagonists finally match the players in this case. I want to cause mayhem, trevor and michael want to cause mayhem. I like driving, so does franklin. And none of them are concerned for the well being of pedestrians. Like it fucking should be.

And yes, protagonists matching player attitudes matters. I bonded with my saints row 2 guy because he would sing along to songs like I do. What were you expecting, the boondock saints?

 

[Able Seacat]

I can understand where the reviewer is coming from in the review. I just hope when I play it the good will out shine the flaws for me. Also, a heads up to anyone getting this for the 360, I read at IGN, that Rockstar has advised not to install the 'play' disc apparently.

 

[Adultratedhydra]

Its as simple as "I dont have anything nice to say about them so i say nothing." Hence i have no opinion of the games since i dont play them. Theres nothing wrong with that.

Fair enough, but stating that you don't acknowledge them is completely different to what you just said. That would be like me saying I don't acknowledge Stalin because I have nothing nice to say about him. It just doesn't work...

I meant to say the same thing for both and have no idea why "Dont acknowledge" came out rather than no opinion. I blame it on the fact that Its 11:30 and i got home from work half hour ago. Need to Give the coffee time to kick in so the thoughts are coherent.

 

[Callate]

In some ways, it sounds like the characters of GTA have finally caught up with the way the game is most frequently played.

That's not a criticism of the review, by the way- just an observation.

As I said elsewhere, the attempts at morality- or at least an awareness of immorality- in GTA IV rang somewhat hollow because there were still plenty of instances wherein you would walk into a mission point with no idea what it would demand of you, and walk out unable to progress unless you killed a dozen people you had never met.

Rockstar has never shied away from making horrible characters do horrible things (Manhunt, anyone?) but it's interesting- and a little unnerving- to hear that they've brought that full circle with their most well known and "mainstream" title.

Then again, he said jocularly, at least it sounds like you aren't constantly badgered by "friends" to go play darts.

 

[Fireprufe15]

I think this is a good review. A review is in essence the opinion of the reviewer. Some people put more weight in aspects like gameplay and graphics, while others put weight in story and characterisation. People also have different tastes. Mr. Greg here, much like me, cares more for story and characterisation. It's not like he completely ignored the good parts of the game and just said what he hated.

He wrote about the good parts and how good it is as well. He didn't like the characterisation, and since that carries a lot of weight for him, he docked the score. 70 is not a bad score.

Thanks Greg, for an honest review. You could just as much have given it a 9 like so many other reviewers, fearing the rage that would follow if you gave it a low score.

 

[lacktheknack]

Mein Gott, the tide of New-Account Rage is ludicrous! D:

It's a bit of a sad statement that a 7/10, a solid "B" in school, is considered "click-bait".

 

[Adultratedhydra]

Mein Gott, the tide of New-Account Rage is ludicrous! D:

You predicted that well.

Where did you get your crystal ball from? I want one...

History has a bad habit of repeating itself. Especially when someone have an opinion that lines up with everyone else.

 

[lacktheknack]

Mein Gott, the tide of New-Account Rage is ludicrous! D:

You predicted that well.

Where did you get your crystal ball from? I want one...

I built my own during the White Guy Defense Force and "YAHTZEE WAS OFFENSIVE" threads.

 

[Fireprufe15]

At least it's a better review than I would have given. (And sorry for the rage shitstorm that follows what I write here)

My review:
Good:
-
Bad:
- Unplayable, does not work on my gaming device. No PC version, no sale.

0/10

 

[TimeLord]

And a tough week for the mods gets even harder. XD

Are you kidding, it's like Christmas for us!

Wait no, what's the opposite of Christmas? Uhhhh... It's like Armageddon! I like to think I'm the Bruce Willis of the Mod team, though obviously that means I'm probably going to die in a heroic ball of flames in a little while... =[

Our universe is doomed!
DOOOOOMED!

OT: Reviews are subjective personal opinions. Boo hoo, a reviewer didn't like a game that you did, does that affect your enjoyment of the game? No. Does it make any difference to your life? No.

Seriously, if I got annoyed at every review that wasn't up to my expectations then is spend half my time shouting at MovieBob because I really like New Star Trek and Man of Steel.
It's one persons opinions, get over it.

 

[Baresark]

I'm sure it's a fine game. I don't really care what the reviewer says about the script. It sounds less flawed than the previous games in that they offered you a false dichotomy to help you deal with what you are doing, this one doesn't. I find it kind of amusing that the game is about a bunch of psychopaths and the people with an over developed sense of empathy are having a problem with it... that is actually really fantastic as far as writing is concerned. In previous games you played mostly murderous psychopaths but it was covered with a false sense of morality that the so called state of "being painted into a corner" brings out.

Don't get me wrong, I am going to wait to see if a PC version actually comes out at all. The idea of playing a bigger city than ever on hardware that is really well beyond it's productive years doesn't sound like a good idea to me. And then to see if they did as horrible a port job as they did with GTA4.

 

[burningdragoon]

At least it's a better review than I would have given. (And sorry for the rage shitstorm that follows what I write here)

My review:
Good:
-
Bad:
- Unplayable, does not work on my gaming device. No PC version, no sale.

0/10

I don't know man. I'd argue that the PC version [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vacuous_truth] is definitely the best version.

 

[AmrasCalmacil]

"Main selling point of GTA is playing as a massive sociopath."

"Waaaahhhhh the game made me play as a massive sociopath! "

For fuck sake, this is GTA. That is not a valid complaint.

I don't think you understand what the words 'valid complaint' mean.

In fact a perfectly good example of a valid complaint about GTA V is - "I enjoyed this game's story and writing less because I had no reason to care on any level about the main characters in it."

A complaint about GTA V that is not valid would be - "I enjoyed this game less because there were neither guns nor cars in it, in fact, the closest thing I could do to committing a crime was jaywalking, which was a bit pointless with no cars around."

I'll give you a few moments to guess what isn't valid about that complaint before I let you click on this very patronising spoiler button.

Spoiler: The Mystical Answer of Validity

The complaint wasn't valid because it wasn't true. As it turns out, guns and cars are a massive chunk of the gameplay. Who'd a thunk it?