Hello

[thethingthatlurks]

don't listen to the horror stories about the basemen

Don't say that the basement is to be feared. If you say such lies and slander someone might actually go down into the basement! Then doom and destruction would eclipses the world forever...

Pff, it's not like you're part of the secret basement society
Or that you know the secret handshake you have to do with a mod, after having told them the secret basement society password, to be allowed to access the secret basement entrance. Yeah, we don't just accept anybody into our illustrious organization. Besides, you probably wouldn't be interested anyway. It's mostly bench drinking, scramble, discussing the works of Voltaire, and sodomy down there, though the order tends to vary. Oh, and rituals dedicated to the Dark Lord, but the left over body parts and blood get cleaned up quite frequently.

 

[Thundero13]

Oh, but we lag on wednesdays, i'm guessing you know about Zero Punctuation?

I watch that and Extra Credits very faithfully.

Right, Zero Punctuation brings in tonnes of lag every wednesday, not Extra Credits though but I do love it too :3

 

[Thundero13]

Bronies are all about love and tolerance man, what have you got against us?

It's the indoctrination. Oh sure, it starts innocently enough. Five minutes here, ten minutes there... then a full episode. And then another. And then a subscription to MAST3RL1NK's youtube channel...

Spoiler: And then THIS happens!

Ponies and bronies might be about love and tolerance, but there's an ulterior motive under there... that same sinisterness clowns have....

Spoiler: you know what i'm talking about...

...
You seem to know an awful lot about the subject, are you an ex-brony or something?

 

[lacktheknack]

Stay out of the basement.

and for God's sake, stay away from the Basement. And the Scary Thread. Especially the Scary Thread.

Cookies are to the right, stay out of the basement.

Is there something I should know about?

There used to be all kinds of events held in the basement, but then we had a troll uprising that we overthrew and had to contain somewhere. So we tossed them all down in the basement and broke the staircase. Its where we toss the banned. So "Stay outta the basement!" can be taken as a blessing along the lines of "May you not be banned!"

The landing halfway down was kind of useless (beyond being a good place to Sparta-kick the banned), so we carved the Religion and Politics forum in there. Since the trolls in the basement are now digging to get out, they'll often show up there first. Hence the massive concentration of trolls in that forum.

If you peer into the blackness of the basement, you may notice that there's one place that the trolls don't dare go near (in the far corner). You may also notice crying sounds coming from that direction. That's the Scary Thread Pocket Dimension, it's the only thread that remains in the main files AND the basement simultaneously. If you wish to see what the basement is like safely, you may <link=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.211546-The-scary-thread>examine that thread. Don't do it. It'll haunt you.

If you wish to have a toned down peek into the basement, feel free to stare at my various avatars for a while.

That's my normal preamble to newbies about the basement, I hope you enjoyed.

http://www.mymomsaidwow.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/the-basement-demotivational-poster.jpg

 

[lacktheknack]

EDIT: and what's this Basement i've heard so much about? i was not informed of this! who is responsible for that travesty? but srs bsns now, what is it?

Sorry I didn't get to you when you joined. I miss some people.

See my above post for information on the basement.

 

[Silent Anima]

Ohai new guy! ^-^ I'm gonna give you a valuable piece of advice.

Enjoy your stay! *firm handshake*

 

[Ninonybox_v1legacy]

I have one piece of advice for you young one.
Beware the Ponies.That is all.

He shall become one of us....

 

[Quextamon]

Welcome to the Escapist! Please don't feed the trolls.

 

[Phoenix_XIII]

Hi! I'm somewhat new myself. Been here for a couple months. Got the ropes. And whatever you do, stick to your opinions like glue, but don't shut down other people's opinions. Learn from them. Oh. And people will give you flak if you mention something stupid about a game before a billion other people start pointing out stupid things about a game.

Learned this from Diablo 3. Hated the class they were pushing as a "Summoner" and then got flak for complaining about a game that wasn't out yet, then people complain about the online-only mode. Heh.

Anyways, WELCOME!

 

[Bob Hoss]

I just figured I should introduce myself before posting. Jumping into the forums with everyone going "Who's the new guy with no avatar and 1 post?" seems rude.

Nah, dun'worry, dude. This is likely one of the most civilized places on the internet. Just be sure to explain yourself and don't be an outright douche-canoe and you'll be fine.

I actually find it nice that you decided to say a little hello.

 

[AzureRaven]

Welcome, nice to meetcha! Love the fact that you used Hobbes.
Beware the ponies, Beware the basement, and for the love of god-
Beware the ponies in the basement.

 

[Nostalgia Ripoff]

My advice:
If you see a red button under someone's avatar, PRESS IT! Its one of those things new people often miss, but its a nice way to score points in the forum.

No! Don't listen to him! It is a button of pure evil! No one should ever press it!

This is the button I'm referring to. Seriously. Don't press it. [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.297629-HEY-Who-wants-to-play-bubble-breaker]

OT: Yep. Welcome to The Escapist. Stay out of the basement, and maybe you'll stay sane. Maybe.

 

[MercurySteam]

I just figured I should introduce myself before posting. Jumping into the forums with everyone going "Who's the new guy with no avatar and 1 post?" seems rude.

Welcome to The Escapist! Enjoy you're time here and get involved with the community. Also here's some bonus welcomes:

Spoiler: If you like Half Life 2

Welcome! Welcome to Escapistmagazine.com! You have chosen, or been chosen, to relocate to one of our finest remaining Internet Utopias. I thought so much of Escapistmagazine.com, that I elected to establish my administration, here, in the Forums, so thoughtfully provided by our Moderators. I am proud to call Escapistmagazine.com my home. And so, whether you are here to stay, or passing through to parts unknown, welcome, to Escapistmagazine.com. It's safer here.

Spoiler: If you like Bioshock

I am MercurySteam, and I am here to ask you a question. Is a man not entitled to the sweat of his brow? "No" Says the man at Ebay, "it belongs to the poor". "No" says the Man at religioustolerance.org, "it belongs to God". "No" says the man at Facebook, "it belongs to everyone". I rejected those answers. Instead; I chose something different. I chose the Impossible. I chose. The Escapist. With a forum where the opinionated would not fear the censor (within reason), where the Moderators would not be bound by petty morality, where the Gone Gonzo would not be constrained by the troll. And with the ache of your fingers (and perhaps a new keyboard), The Escapist can be yours as well...

 

[Dr Snakeman]

Stay out of the basement.

and for God's sake, stay away from the Basement. And the Scary Thread. Especially the Scary Thread.

Cookies are to the right, stay out of the basement.

Is there something I should know about?

Not really. Trust me; when I was new here, I actually made a thread asking people what the Basement was. It's just a joke, a made-up realm of horror on this site.

Although, some people (myself included) refer to the Religion and Politics forum as "the basement", since it tends to be full of rage and general nastiness. It's not a good place to spend time. Personally, I wouldn't touch it with a 39 1/2-foot-pole.

Oh, and the scary thread is... well, it's pretty damn scary. It's kind of fun, but I advise against visiting it late at night, especially if you plan on getting any sleep.

And with that... welcome to the Escapist. It's nice to internet-meet you, I Have No Idea. Making an "introduction" thread was kind of unnecessary, though.

 

[Silent Anima]

OT: Yep. Welcome to The Escapist. Stay out of the basement, and maybe you'll stay sane. Maybe.

Sane on the Escapist? Don't kid yourself.

 

[I Have No Idea]

Just be sure to explain yourself and don't be an outright douche-canoe and you'll be fine.

Douche-canoe...I've gotta use that one sometime...

 

[lacktheknack]

Stay out of the basement.

and for God's sake, stay away from the Basement. And the Scary Thread. Especially the Scary Thread.

Cookies are to the right, stay out of the basement.

Is there something I should know about?

Not really. Trust me; when I was new here, I actually made a thread asking people what the Basement was. It's just a joke, a made-up realm of horror on this site.

Although, some people (myself included) refer to the Religion and Politics forum as "the basement", since it tends to be full of rage and general nastiness. It's not a good place to spend time. Personally, I wouldn't touch it with a 39 1/2-foot-pole.

Oh, and the scary thread is... well, it's pretty damn scary. It's kind of fun, but I advise against visiting it late at night, especially if you plan on getting any sleep.

And with that... welcome to the Escapist. It's nice to internet-meet you, I Have No Idea. Making an "introduction" thread was kind of unnecessary, though.

I'm trying to make a "canonical" basement, and I think I've got the perfect one.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.304903-Hello?page=2#12237629

Wanna help spread it around any time someone asks?

 

[Silent Anima]

Douche-canoe...I've gotta use that one sometime...

Just remembered something. There's people who kinda RP on these threads. Examples: A person with a Calumon avatar who makes Caluman talk in every thread post. I like that person. Another with a Bear Grylls avatar that says "...better drink my own piss." at the end of his posts. They make the threads very enjoyable.

 

[GartarkMusik]

This site has quite a big influx of new users. If every single one posted a pointless thread like this it would be quite annoying and pointless. Try to make topics with a bit more purpose. Bad new user, bad. Don't make me fetch a rolled up newspaper.

Oh come on now, be nice to the newbie, he'll learn!

OT: Liking the avatar. Calvin and Hobbes is awesome. :-D

 

[Tharwen]

Can someone find Insanum's welcome video? That's always good to have in these threads?

Hang on...

...

...watch this! It explains everything!


(I did get the right video, didn't I? This computer doesn't have flash so I can't check)