How do I convince her games have merit?

[Plurralbles]

Is she watching TV? Pull its plug and bring out a board game. Spend time with her and your studies and bring over(and preferably fuck) some people you're attracted to and party every weekend and come home really really late or not at all. Get some drug charges brought up.

If she complains about any of this, explain to her that this is her, "ordinary" that she's pushing on you and to either like it or gtfo.

 

[Funkiest Monkey]

Slap the *****.

 

[Jasper Jeffs]

Slap the *****.

This. Punch her square in the face and say "bitches don't know".

My mum used to be like this, now she doesn't give a fuck for some reason. I don't know what happened, she just stopped caring.

 

[Talon_Skywarp]

God, I wasn't aware this kind of stuff still happened!

My Argument

OK, consider the millions of people who sit around on facebook all day doing nothing but looking at other people's lives.

Now consider the millions of people who sit around watching tv, which features high amounts of sexual images and violence.

Now consider the people who hang about on the streets, getting drunk, fighting and having underage sex (Oh how I miss these days).

I really don't think it will work, just point out how many worst things you could be doing.

I'm not the best person to say though, I pretty much had an easy ride as a kid. Did what I wanted.

 

[ntw3001]

Do you see the friends you play with outside Halo, or it that just what you do together? Because one time my parents said something along the lines of 'Shouldn't you be doing something sociable', and since I happened to be playing L4D I just identified the three guys I was playing with. Since they were the same people I was usually hanging out with anyway, they got that L4D was just the thing we were doing that night.

Also, do you have friends or family outside town you play with? Parents totally dig things that encourage you to interact with family members or maintain contact with friends who've moved away. When my brother lived a long way away, we'd chat on WoW and Steam and my parents thought that was pretty okay. But oh yeah, games with a chat function work better. Well, PC games are probably better. Instead of you talking to nothing and getting clamouring TV voices in return (which is a little creepy really), she can see that you're talking. She asks who you're talking to, you tell her, it's someone she knows, she can see that conversation is taking place, that's cool. Uh, if it's actual conversation it's cool. She does have to understand the words you're using; if you exchange in-game jargon she'll just hear 'I am deeply immersed in game culture! I now speak a garbled language which has no meaning to human ears!'

But yeah, reasoning probably won't work. She has to see that games are a thing you do as part of, but not instead of, your social life, and then she can connect the dots. Since you're playing with people you know in real life it's not hard to swallow. But if it's just a case of 'some nights we hang out, but nobody felt like going out so we're doing this', it's pretty clear that you're doing something with friends where you'd otherwise just be killing time.

 

[lovemyredguitar]

People who talk about video games like this will be remembered along with the people who burned books, trashed TV, and killed musicians. (Just to quote extra credits, and no offense to your mother.) Anyway if your grades arent slipping, if your friends dont hate you, and if you still go outside a little there should be no problem. Tell her that

 

[Folio]

In The Olde Days, books are what television and games are now. It's a difference in generations. Playing a game is as brain-numbing as watching a soap opera. So if she's watching one, tell her.

 

[open trap]

Tell her it improves your eye sight and reactions, because it actually does. and also your playing with real friends.

 

[KaosuHamoni]

Ask her the Geth question from Mass Effect 2, and then tell her that it is from ME2, and that she is depriving you of the possibility for you to answer those questions by blanket-banning them altogether.

 

[Twilight_guy]

Do what she says and show that you are responsible so that she trusts you to do what you like later? Really there is no way to convince her to listen to you and the more you complain the more dead-set she'll get. I suggest going along with her and bringing it up again later when she cools a bit and sees that not gaming doesn't affect your life at all. Also, don't complain or it'll prove her point.

 

[The Unworthy Gentleman]

How do I convince her it isn't killing my soul?

There's one thing you have to learn now; you can't. There is little chance of you convincing your mam. You can kick off an absolute shit storm. You can be as unbearable as physically possible and it's completely okay, you're a teenager and you have many hormones driving you crazy (hahah, what a load of horse shit that really is). You'll probably have to sacrifice a lot for it though so I suggest you don't.

Of course, there is the possibility that she will see this as a sign that you do have an addiction. Aside from doing the above method, you can always not play games at all just to spite her. Show her you have no addiction to games and then politely ask her for your console back. Point out that you've been capable of not playing games without causing a shit storm, also point out that you haven't been as happy as you used to and can't get in touch with your old friends that you have on your xbox.

NOTE: If you do use the method of showing her you can go without games but don't like it then you need to time your approach right. Too long and your chance is gone, too soon and she'll think you have an addiction.

 

[imnot]

Tell her she's right and you'll spend your free time hanging outside instead. Then go break the law or get caught doing drugs. If she isn't an idiot she'd put two and two together.

Or just demonstrate the above example to her verbally.

Wow!

So so far I have:

?Sing Italian Music
?Break the Law

...next?

Kill yourself, then haunt her!

 

[snow]

Tell her she's right and you'll spend your free time hanging outside instead. Then go break the law or get caught doing drugs. If she isn't an idiot she'd put two and two together.

Or just demonstrate the above example to her verbally.

Wow!

So so far I have:

?Sing Italian Music
?Break the Law

...next?

Show her the articles that are floating around about how colleges are using games to demonstrate real world thinking skills and science.

Find out what she's interested in when it comes to story telling, then pick a game that matches that and say "Hey Mom, wouldn't it be cool if they made a story that involved this, this and this?"

"Yeah son that is a great idea, you should write that..."

"Mom that is from the video game *insert name here*"

I personally never had a problem when it came to my parents and video games, but every once in a while I will play a game and find an area that is absolutely beautiful to look at, and screenshot it.

She actually uses some of the screenshots I took from Age of Conan as her desktop at work, and the people she worked with wondered where she found such a beautiful image... Yeah...

Pretty much what your mother is getting at is the typical "I'm ignorant to what it is you're actually doing so I don't like what you're doing." Parenting. Get her involved, teach her what it is that makes games so special to you.

 

[Daden]

My mom is dead set in scapegoating video-games for all my 'inadequacies' (no innuendo intended). She feels that all video games are useless and mind killing, even more so than television. She believe I have an 'addiction' which she has to cure, and my modest 10-hours-a-week playtime has been reduced to zero. I usually play Halo and I'm ecstatic about Reach. All my friends love it and we play together every night. Since they live far away it's a great way to spend time together and socialize. On the contrary, she sees it as antisocial and useless, so now my four-player Legendary runthrough is a three-man game and I'm stuck hearing stories of 'epic kills' the next day. How do I convince her it isn't killing my soul?

This situation is somewhat difficult for me to relate to, as I have gamed with my mother, father, sister, friends, and now my fiancée, throughout my life. That being said, I think I can offer you some different advice from the usual here.

First, you probably can't change your mother's mind. Even if you offer hard proof that gaming isn't harmful (e.g. a research study, of which there are few), she will have the inclination to stick to her guns because she doesn't want her authority undermined and she has already made up her mind on the issue. Furthermore, many people don't value sound logic and the scientific method over their preferred procurer of anecdotal evidence (e.g. Oprah and the like), and, anyway, it isn't difficult to see how your mother might question the utility in shooting aliens, better reflexes or no.

Second, think hard about the inadequacies your mother is referring to. If you need to be devoting more free time to school work at the expense of your already paltry 10-hour-a-week gaming diet, then do it. If you fuck up school, I guarantee gaming will be the only bright spot in your life one day. If she's referring to a lack of a genuine social life or being out of shape, make a plan to remedy these situations and implement. When she sees you are becoming a responsible adult, chances are you will be allotted more freedom. Don't worry about "proving her right," just think about bettering yourself.

Last, I understand that gaming is one of your favorite things in the world, and I would have been just as upset as you when I was your age. Despite this, gaming comes at a price, my friend. Sure, there is a niche group you can relate to better, but there are even larger groups that you correspondingly can't relate to and skills you will fail to develop, as there is only so much time in a life. At this point in MY life, for example, I wish I'd spent more time learning the guitar and a foreign language and less time pwning noobs.

Anyway, some food for thought. Best of luck to you, and I hope it works out!

 

[Oinodaemon]

benefits to gaming (these are just the ones i know about, im sure there are plenty of others)

1. Improved hand eye coordination --I'll use halo as my example since im not sure what other games you play, having to shoot something before it shoots you obviously forces your mind to react very quickly. As a result, your mind will react more quickly to things in real life.

2. i really dont know what to call this one...um...sight processing...i suppose...yea... ---Ok, so the average person can only count 5 things in a single instant, ie, if you have a bag of jellybeans laid out on a table you will only be able to register 5 at time (a lot of ppl arent even that high) When you have a whole horde of Covenant shooting at you, you need to be able to count them very quickly. This pushes your mind, allowing you to count more things in one go.

 

[pretentiousname01]

Shadow of the Colossus and Heavy Rain. If those two can't convince her that games can be worthwhile then you should probably consider killing your mum.

I'm pretty sure her last words would be

"See I told you so!!! gargle"

 

[omega 616]

snip

Tell her to read

Spoiler: This

http://www.sciencedirect.com/scienc...fd3b71880926e2fa3cddff61fff61aed&searchtype=a

And when your at home gaming your not out in the big dangerous world, were people can get you on drugs, booze, might fall into a gang and make you sexually active (sorry, just watched "Juno") but at home she can keep an eye on you!

If that doesn't work, sucks to be you.

 

[CrazyMedic]

I would suggest installing something like civ(one where there isn't realist violence) wait for her to call you and say something along the lines "be right there mom once I negotiate this Iron ore pact this china" and if she asks what it is say you were playing civilization.

 

[Oinodaemon]

lol, i hit the button by mistake

3. its an interactive medium ---See, tv actually does make you stupider. Our brains more or less shut down while watching television. With games, we may not always be thinking, but we ARE reacting. There is actually a lot of brain function going on when you play any game.

4. (and this ones my favorite) -----Y'know how playing a musical instrument is supposed to make you smarter? Well, the whole thing has to do with expanding your mind beyond it's programmed limits. Learning to read music teaches you to perceive groups of objects more quickly than an average person. You don't THINK when you play music (at least not sheet music) but you ARE reacting... My pattern seem familiar?



dude, I played trumpet for 5 years, guitar for 6, bass for 5 and piano for 5....playing games for 17 years...I'm not bragging, but I was not only the top of my class but the top of my school. My friends, also gamers, are ALL really fucking smart. I'm not saying video games make people smart, but they help to build on what's already there.

Make your mom read this...or like, write it down and go read it to her or something......

for your mom if she does read this "lady, there is no need for your ignorance. If you're going to hate on something, at least get yourself informed about it. I assume your son plays online...yeah, there are jerks online. Lots of em. However, nothing he hears coming from the mouth of some idiot online could possibly be worse than what he hears every day at school, or on the television."


and with that, i bid you good day...

 

[Nouw]

Useless and just about killing? I guess the last game she saw was Doom. Show her Shadow of the Colossus.

But looks likes she's really stubborn.

*GASP!

I've found a fix. Study really hard until your next exam/test comes out. When you get a good grade tell her you've been playing video games all the time.