How has society shaped you?

[DrgoFx]

I got to thinking after some childhood dumpster diving with my girlfriend, and I realized why I stopped being a nice, sweet guy and became...well...an asshole. Aside from my closest friends and my soul mate, I am probably right up there in the rudest of people. I have boundaries though, respecting those of higher authority to me and I try not to start anything. But once someone starts it, I'm not just going to let it slide.

But, going back to the sudden shift in personality, I used to be a really sweet kid. I didn't wrong anyone, I was nice to whoever I met and always tried to stay positive. But from how my life was, all that did was present me with "friends" I couldn't count on, got me picked on for being a "gay-pussy-******" and no girl wanted to go out with me. With that kind of treatment, it's really no wonder I turned out how I am today.

But what really ticks me off is how I'm trying to change for the better, just for the sake of my girlfriend because as it is, I can't be with her when she's with her friends without either of us being judged or ridiculed. Even her family disapproves of me. But to those that know me, she's the perfect girl for me. The problem is, every time I attempt to be that nice sweet guy I am under the hardened shell of rudeness, I'm shown exactly why that shell is there in the first place. No matter how nice I am, no matter how polite I am, no matter or respective I am, they just try to tick me off. I put up with it, just absorbing the blows they take, but at times I do just snap.

I honestly wanted to vent this out right away, but after thinking through this post I figured why not get the escapist's input? We're all fairly diverse people, why not see how the world has shaped us? How it made us different and how we have adapted to what we've been shown.

 

[pilouuuu]

I can understand your point of view. I have always tried to be polite and kind, but society makes it hard for you being like that. If anything society made more scared of people, especially after being bullied as a child for being from another country and not liking sports. I think the influence of society is mostly bad, but I have tried to not let my surrounding influence me too much, so I got to learn English on my own and I try to have more independant thinking and a richer imagination than most of the people that surrounds me. I think that what society tries to do is to make all of us the same and identical, with no personality whatsoever and it's our personal duty to fight against that.

My advice to you is that if the place that you live or the people that surround you makes you become rude, try to fight it, by being extra polite or if you really want to be rude, be rude, but only because you decided, not because other people forced you to be like that. If it doesn't work out, then try to move to another place that's not full of idiots, if possible. Always try to be a better person for you, your girlfriend and the people that is worth it.

 

[Keoul]

I hate everyone

Society has certainly shown it's "true colours" to me and it's definitely made me a very hateful person. Fortunately being the strange person I am, I just bottle all this hate and masquerade around as a generally nice guy all the time. Helping strangers and friends alike even if I secretly hate their guts.

It's mostly relationships that made me so hateful, never been in one myself but just hearing those stories of human betrayal and all that junk just makes my blood boil

 

[White Lightning]

I hate everything everywhere at everytime.

 

[Eddie the head]

People suck. Individuals don't. Seriously as a group I hate republicans but my best friend is one. As a group people form my high school sucked, but on there own merits they where alright. As a group star wars fans are the most annoying thing on the planet, by them self's they can be fun.

 

[FalloutJack]

Society doesn't shape me. I shape me. Proven by the fact that I did NOT go on a murderous rampage in middle school.

 

[Vault101]

society...hmmmm

well society certainly didnt break me, due to me having alot of provalige in life..
...perhaps I tend to keep to myself...but to be hoenst thats just me probably

honestly you can only blame/get mad at society to a certian extent, your still in control of some things

 

[Thaluikhain]

Impossible to say, I've got no non-societied me to compare with.

People love pretending that society only affects everyone that isn't them, which obviously isn't true, but then again, they love using it as an excuse for what they do.

This is always and awkward issue, leads into discussions of blame and censorship and so on.

 

[Frybird]

I didn't care much for the things around me, and as such society moved away while i wasn't paying attention and only now i feel like i'm being locked out.

Then again i don't really feel like rekindling with it either.

I guess we are on good speaking terms, but we only contact each other rarely.

 

[NoeL]

It's mostly relationships that made me so hateful, never been in one myself but just hearing those stories of human betrayal and all that junk just makes my blood boil

Stop living vicariously through others. Never has the phrase "get a life" been more appropriate.

 

[Keoul]

It's mostly relationships that made me so hateful, never been in one myself but just hearing those stories of human betrayal and all that junk just makes my blood boil

Stop living vicariously through others. Never has the phrase "get a life" been more appropriate.

Let me elaborate a bit more. Having to help friends calm down after a bad relationship and hearing all the crap people do has made me pretty pessimistic on the whole relationship thing. Not to mention I don't see how getting a life is relavent? Simplifying "living" into just getting a girlfriend seems extremely shallow

 

[Keoul]

It's mostly relationships that made me so hateful, never been in one myself but just hearing those stories of human betrayal and all that junk just makes my blood boil

Stop living vicariously through others. Never has the phrase "get a life" been more appropriate.

Let me elaborate a bit more. Having to help friends calm down after a bad relationship and hearing all the crap people do has made me pretty pessimistic on the whole relationship thing. Not to mention I don't see how getting a life is relavent? Simplifying "living" into just getting a girlfriend seems extremely shallow

Also, society makes me realize that I cannot tell this person what they might be doing wrong without me once more becoming a target and said person being a victim.

speak your mind as long as you have some form of reasoning behind it don't feel victimized >.>

 

[OldRat]

No man can claim to have not been shaped by his surroundings. The society shapes you, either by attraction or repulsion, and much of anyone is the product of his time and place. I won't give any examples of myself, since that feels like trying to explain a lake by describing drops of water.

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

Society has made me realise that I don't really like socialising all that much. It's made me rather cynical and pessimistic, while simultaneously giving me a kind of 'Que Sera, Sera' attitude that puts me a bit more at ease with it.

People suck. Individuals don't.

Also that, society has definately taught me that.

 

[Keoul]

snip

Now you're having a biased opinion, I always try to get both sides of the story and act/react with reason, relationships is just one of the main reasons why I dislike people, probably since it's all my friends talk about (society) these days and it's shaped me like this.

 

[Keoul]

That is bias.

Not only are you presenting the calming down of your friends as a chore, you are also directly saying that what they told you of their bad relationships is what gives you this opinion.

As I said, you can't be bothered with it and it sounds like you are using the bad experiences of your friends as a excuse to not gather experience of your own. That is also precisely what you should have understood under getting a life, not that a relationship makes said life, but that you shouldn't be judging on basis of the experiences of others.

And yes, I am saying this because I am biased, by society, to initially believe you are a idiot until you have proven otherwise. However also because I notice the little things, like the signifigance of you using the word ''Having'', as in, you were forced to do something you didn't want to do, likely because you know yourself that you would be considered a dick if you didn't. Thus your annoyance comes across in little things in your text and helps you in justifying your bias.

My bias is justfied by the masses of people who have wrongfully thought they could bullshit me.

Just because I haven't been in a romantic relationship doesn't mean I'm not pursuing one. I'm using the bad experience of friends as expectations. Isn't the whole "learning" thing in general basing life on the experience of others? every book you read every website you visit is a product of someone else s experience.

The whole "having" is because there is no one else there for them and I'm the only one they have to turn to talk about this kinda stuff since either everyone only cares about the gossip part or they don't trust anyone else to talk about these things. I do it out common decency and the whole nice guy thing

EDIT: I did change a few things up to seem less bias

 

[The Metalist]

Meh, I have a strong dislike of 85% of soceity. Yet I never treat anyone badly, ever. It's because that 15% is worth it, and truth be told, you don't know who that 15% is on face value. For example, I recently met a guy, fit the biker gang stereotype look perfectly; nicest bloke ever, swore like a sailor though.

How that's shaped me though? I'm a sarcastic, cynical, pessimistic, creative, quiet (I generally won't initialize conversation with people I don't have business with or know) intellectual who fights for the greater good though I'm not thoroughly convinced its out there, or that there's enough there to be worth it. Yet I treat everyone with respect until I deem they are not worthy of it anymore, (through their actions, not beliefs) voice my opinion where I deem its needed and aid all, despite my personal feelings for them.

If that's confusing, then that's fair enough, I'm quite confusing emotionally.
Put basically, Im frustrated with society because I can't trust anyone and the vast majority treats you like dirt in their self absorbed little lives, but I continue to good member of society anyway, because distrust and fear of society is what made it what it is today, and breeding more of it is good for no-one.

 

[Doclector]

Put it this way, I'd consider myself a man made monster. When I was really young, I could be considered normal. Sure, I had aspergers syndrome, but I wasn't much more wierd than any other prepubescent kid. Then the bullying started. It was public, and even then, brutal. I was beaten, abused, and always told to try ignoring it.

I got to secondary school, and they promised it would stop. I was probably a little mental by this point, but of course, that wasn't enough for the f***ers. It got worse. It was daily by then. On a few occasions, I was threatened with stuff like pieces of glass, knives, and baseball bats. I became more and more angry, and more and more paranoid. One day, I snapped. Badly beat five of them, and almost throttled one of them. I'll admit, I didn't like it. I loved it. The fear in that f***ers eyes was delicious.

So, I got out, but that left me paranoid and in a new town. As you can imagine, I didn't go out much. Depression came a-knocking. Help did not. This went on for years, and the few friends I did pick up at college came to know and fear my hair trigger temperment. I never wonder why they don't seem to talk to me much even though I have most of them on facebook, because I know.

Now, I'm in uni. The creative freedom of my work allows me both to vent and make use of my scrambled mind. I want to be a horror director, as I've become fascinated with fear. Things are different here. Strange people are welcomed, and thus I'm probably one of the most popular people here, a fact that confuses me even after the better part of a year. Occasionally though, people take issue with me. That angers me. Normal people's lack of knowledge of cause and effect always does. It always seems to be the kind of people who made me the way I am who take issue with the kind of person I've become.

Sorry frankenstein. You just can't put your monster back on that little table. It's loose now.

 

[SamuelT]

Wow. Lots of people here hating society. It kinda surprises me, as I've been through much of the stuff described here. Bullying, threatening, shitty friends, ridicule, physical assault, you name it. And still I've turned out to be a decent person. I try to be nice to other people, beyond the simple howdoyoudo's and whatnot, and don't exactly expect anything in return. The natural high from being nice to others is kinda awesome at times, that if you see strangers eyes light up after you've given them some money to top off a bill, or when you start helping someone who obviously is in need.

Either this is because I've been raised by awesome parents, or it's just something I do. You decide.

 

[Keoul]

First off you're probably right, I HAVE been influence a lot by these people, and it probably has made me biased on the subject of relationships.

That however doesn't change that you can't be bothered with relationships to begin with

I'm putting the needs of others ahead of my own to sustain a relationship, is that not enough to show I'm bothered with them? unless you mean romantic, which is meaningless to discuss since you won't believe me anyway right?

In other words:

Blablabla, blablabla you don't care what I have to say about it anyway blablabla blablabla because you have your own reasons to think that way blablabla bla bla blabla, you may however question the validity of your own reasoning blabla bla which makes you uncomfortable blabla bla bla bla thus you look for outside justification blabla bla.

I also can't be wrong about this.

Seems like a rather childish way of putting it don't you think? I do care about your opinion and what you say, that's why I asked for it when you first posted.
I'd like you to pick holes in my reasoning so that I can improve and understand what makes you feel so adamant that I'm a jibbering moron who's biased that relationships are horrible little things that end in hate.
Also while our little conversation has been going on several other users have also posted about hating everyone, is it because I included relationships in my post that you're still targeting me? I'm beginning to think you've been through the whole "consoling a friend" business or just don't read anyone else posts.

Anyway this thread is all about how society has shaped individuals and evidently it has changed my opinion of people (being mean and cruel and all that) from the stories of bad relationships gossiped about by friends, besides isn't trust a key factor in friendship?

The whole justification thing shouldn't really matter since that's what everyone's trying to do in an argument like the one we're in right now