I need crimes!!

[dfcrackhead]

I'm writing something in which the character does a lot of criminal misdeeds and I can't think of any. They'd have to be fairly simple and short (meaning no long term stuff like kidnapping or whatever) and nothing to gruesome(rape, slaughtering an entire farm and hanging their entrails from the windows around town) and set in a modern society.

So far I have streaking, beating up a homeless guy and robbing a bank.

Also, the greater the punishment from the law in the event of being caught, the better

So far the good suggestions I've seen are: breaking in to homes, mugging, vandalism and possibly selling drugs

 

[SturmDolch]

Mugging a newlywed couple, breaking into houses for fun and profit, and stealing babies then selling them to goblins on the night market.

 

[SnootyEnglishman]

Robbing several high-class houses then selling them back to them at inflated prices.

 

[Eumersian]

Poking a badger with a spoon. Public urination. Yelling at passersby about the weather. Going into a very suburban white town and walking around in black clothes (which gets the cops called in my hometown).

 

[Vek]

Also, the greater the punishment from the law in the event of being caught, the better

He pirated music in America and the RIAA caught him...

/fuck the RIAA.

OT: Drug trafficking is a good one, illegal weapon sales, racketeering.

 

[Krion_Vark]

I'm writing something in which the character does a lot of criminal misdeeds and I can't think of any. They'd have to be fairly simple and short (meaning no long term stuff like kidnapping or whatever) and nothing to gruesome(rape, slaughtering an entire farm and hanging their entrails from the windows around town) and set in a modern society.

So far I have streaking, beating up a homeless guy and robbing a bank.

Also, the greater the punishment from the law in the event of being caught, the better

Just kicking in a door and placing something in the house that the people didn't have before MULTIPLE times just to fuck with them.

 

[Megacobb]

Stealing data from a software company in a skyscraper then jump out a window and breaking all the windows on your way down while parachutin and randomly tossing grenades at the ground below.

 

[dfcrackhead]

Mugging a newlywed couple, breaking into houses for fun and profit, and stealing babies then selling them to goblins on the night market.

I like the first two. Also, your avatar, where is it from, it looks kind of like the dude from the Professional, or possibly the guy from Blind Justice(I think thats the right name, blind guy goes around killing people who are trying to raid this town and he has a baby or something)

 

[tijuanatim]

Have him start some sort of online scam, directed towards an older demographic. Courts are starting to crack down on crimes over the net and when the victim is older or deemed unable to defend themselves the courts are usually harsher. Especially since the elderly typically would have no idea they were being conned.

 

[Stryc9]

Knocking over convenience stores, home invasion, arson, murder, grand theft auto, stealing mail, vandalism.

 

[dfcrackhead]

Also, the greater the punishment from the law in the event of being caught, the better

He pirated music in America and the RIAA caught him...

/fuck the RIAA.

OT: Drug trafficking is a good one, illegal weapon sales, racketeering.

I've thought about the RIAA thing and including it as a joke and the other 3 are a bit too long term, the real window of operation for this thing is pretty much a single afternoon/night and I don't think anyone could become a gun smuggler or racketeer in a day. The drug thing, possibly, maybe, I'll think about it

I'm writing something in which the character does a lot of criminal misdeeds and I can't think of any. They'd have to be fairly simple and short (meaning no long term stuff like kidnapping or whatever) and nothing to gruesome(rape, slaughtering an entire farm and hanging their entrails from the windows around town) and set in a modern society.

So far I have streaking, beating up a homeless guy and robbing a bank.

Also, the greater the punishment from the law in the event of being caught, the better

Just kicking in a door and placing something in the house that the people didn't have before MULTIPLE times just to fuck with them.

You're a Dane Cook fan. For shame. Although I'll admit, that bit was pretty funny.

 

[Magicman10893]

-Arson?
-Graffiti spree?
-Driving around shooting people with a paintball gun?
-Breaking windows with a baseball bat at random? Public drunkenness?
-Selling/Abusing drugs?
-Random attacks with a wrench?
-Throwing bricks through windows with mean spirited notes about the home owner attached?
-Slashing tires?
-Stealing car radios?

I can go on and on about this for a while.
-Hiring prostitutes?
-Becoming a prostitute?
-Running a prostitution ring (aka being a pimp)?
-Starting a small biker gang?
-Stealing cars and crashing them into department stores and stealing everything he can get a hold of?
-Shoplifting?

 

[Vhite]

Steal THE nothing from the beggars and then sell it to rich people.

 

[Canid117]

As long as you can keep control of your wiki walk this might be a good jumping off point.

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CompleteMonster

 

[Johnnyallstar]

Taking a baseball bat to parking meters.
Randomly opening fire hydrants.
Rigging an ATM to give 10x the amount requested.
Rob the bank to give to homeless.
Vandalizing pictures of people in a consistent, stylish, signature way.
Graffiti things to change their meaning.
Putting crowbars into the fans of external air conditioners.

I'll try to think of more. Can you tell us why he's doing them? If you want help to "flesh" out a character, it would help to know more about the character.

 

[dfcrackhead]

Taking a baseball bat to parking meters.
Randomly opening fire hydrants.
Rigging an ATM to give 10x the amount requested.
Rob the bank to give to homeless.
Vandalizing pictures of people in a consistent, stylish, signature way.
Graffiti things to change their meaning.
Putting crowbars into the fans of external air conditioners.

I'll try to think of more. Can you tell us why he's doing them? If you want help to "flesh" out a character, it would help to know more about the character.

He's committing the crimes so he can get caught and go to jail, but there has to be some sort of way for everything to go wrong(A Murphy's Law sort of thing, if it can go wrong, it will)

 

[Nostalgia Ripoff]

Hacking into a game developers computers and stealing what the company has so far of the game, a la Half-Life 2. Then asking for a job at said company.

 

[Krion_Vark]

Just kicking in a door and placing something in the house that the people didn't have before MULTIPLE times just to fuck with them.

You're a Dane Cook fan. For shame. Although I'll admit, that bit was pretty funny.

That is the only bit I really like by him the others got old fast except for the Atheist one that I still find a little funny.

 

[Frozen Donkey Wheel2]

Making the UN headquarters disappear by putting a gigantic sheet over it.

 

[dfcrackhead]

Hacking into a game developers computers and stealing what the company has so far of the game, a la Half-Life 2. Then asking for a job at said company.

Wow, as soon as I saw "hacking into a game developer" I was all ready to quote and go "You mean like Half-Life 2? lol" But you then ninja'd me in that exact same post....Sneaky sneaky