If you could write a letter to your past-self...

hippykiller

hippykiller

New member
Dec 28, 2008
1,025
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to my 97 year old self

DO NOT BANG THAT TEENAGE CHEERLEADER! SHE'S GOING TO BE OBSESSED WITH YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! oh and in case you were wondering 97 year old self, if you did "do" her, she's legal so don't go and have a heart attack in worry.
 
Altio

Altio

New member
Oct 18, 2008
121
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Dear me,

Whatever you do, don't be the nice guy and go out with that girl from broadcasting when she asks you, or the brainiac for that matter, you will be ridiculed for a very long time.

Your Future Self

P.S. Ask more girls out, don't be such a little patsy.

P.P.S. Get your work done early, things will be much better at home and you'll have more time to play video games later
 
S

Srcruls

New member
Jul 13, 2009
93
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Dear me

If my maths is good, you'll get this letter on your 13th birthday. So first things first. Teachers cant touch you! You can do whatever you want at school. Just make sure you pass.
Secondly. Do something with your hair. You'd of looked alright if you did something with it. Actulary do nothing with it. when you wash, dont brush it. it always looked better messy.
Next, girls like it when you treat them like shit. Drop the nice guy thing already. You should used kelly as a "practice girl" rather than calling her a slag.

To be safe. on the 28th august 2004 dont cross any roads. You'll never hear the end of being hit by a volvo. I mean come on there lights are always on ffs! and there massive.

When sister turns 18 she will buy you booze if you ask her nice enough. if you can wait an extra year your mum will get you booze for parties as long as you tell her where it is... you dont have to be truthfull here cause she wont check. At these parties dont try and get andy out the ditch, cause he will punch you. instead leave him. at 3am he will get out himself infront of a passing police van and its more funny to watch. id advise taking a camera, cause there will be a website called youtube which you can upload it too for all to enjoy.

When your at college ASK MAXINE OUT. asap! before your 17th birthday. She's still hot now :D

When you meet nikki and leeanne take note. they become really good mates. Its surprising but at least now your prepared.

knowlsey will stop talking to you if you dont get him a birthday present in 2007. This turns out to be good so dont fight it.

Oh lastly. When sister offers you her peugeot 106 for free. DONT TAKE IT!!! ITS THE WORST CAR IVE EVER DRIVEN AND IT WILL COST YOU £600+ to repair it for 3 months at which point its head gaskets go. DONT BOTHER.

Also the radio is not the most important part of the car!! Get the brakes fixed first.

.............

ok i could go on here. but this is getting quite long so il stop here
 
clicketycrack

clicketycrack

New member
Apr 6, 2009
1,034
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Dear past self,
Hey! I remember you. You're a fucking asshole, but look on the bright side, you get better.
sincerely,
your future self
 
MK Tha Rebel

MK Tha Rebel

New member
Jun 12, 2009
394
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Dear past self,

Start lifting weights as soon as you get this. Trust me, life is easy as long as you look good.

Don't change who you are. Don't act like someone you're not just to make people happy. It's never worth it.

Don't date Rebeca in high school. In fact, kill her if you ever get the chance. Save you the frustration.

Here's some important info: *Here are lottery numbers with corresponding dates and results for wrestling and sporting events. All with dates and how much to bet* You know what to do with it.

Kill the following people if you get the chance. If not, just don't have anything to do with them *List of people*

Don't grow your hair out in high school. In fact, get is buzzed. 1 one the sides, 3 on the top.

Grow a goatee as soon as you can! Let it grow out so it's long. It's an awesome look and will help you out in life. Maintain that look.

Avoid myspace.com. Not worth it.

NEVER WORK AT K-MART. Apply at *Job and where it is* as soon as you can work.

For the love of god, don't drive the car to Clifton after trade school. It's not worth it.

One more thing, and this is important: Change high schools. Do whatever it takes, go to a different high school. If you can do that, than you won't have to kill anyone.

Good luck, and don't worry. Even after all the crap I'm trying to help you avoid, things still got better over time.

Your future self

P.S.- Seriously, GOATEE AND BUZZ CUT. It works!
 
Zombie_Fish

Zombie_Fish

Opiner of Mottos
Mar 20, 2009
4,584
0
0
Dear past self,

Why did you have to put on so much weight?

Anyway, love you and remember, avoid any TinyURL links.

Zombie

PS: Yeah, you're called Zombie_Fish in the future. Don't ask why. Mainly because I'm your future self so I would have to ask it and then answer it so I'd look like a bit of a pillock.
 
Sonicron

Sonicron

Do the buttwalk!
Mar 11, 2009
5,133
0
0
"Dear L,

throw your self-doubt overboard, you're better at what you do than you think. Keep up the good work.
Also, do more sports and ix-nay on the fatty foods! My god, look in the mirror! XD

Your future self"
 
Varchld

Varchld

is drunk and disorderly.
Nov 8, 2008
446
0
0
Don't worry, you'll meet her in May of 2009.
Things won't always go right, but keep at it and you'll be greatful.

Aside from that, get some money together. You'll need it because airfares are expensive.
 
Hamster at Dawn

Hamster at Dawn

It's Hazard Time!
Mar 19, 2008
1,650
0
0
Dear David,
Here are the lottery numbers for the next 5 weeks, should be enough to get you through the rest of your life. Don't worry about changing the future, I already did that when I sent you this letter. I am probably being used as energy for a giant robot right now. Be sure to buy a Cribs worthy house of unnecessary proportions and a box factory. The box factory is very important. If you're still reading this then that means that the universe hasn't imploded due to a paradox so go ahead and do whatever the fuck you feel like.
-You in 2 years time
 
TheSeventhLoneWolf

TheSeventhLoneWolf

New member
Mar 1, 2009
2,064
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Varchld said:
Don't worry, you'll meet her in May of 2009.
Things won't always go right, but keep at it and you'll be greatful.

Aside from that, get some money together. You'll need it because airfares are expensive.
Click to expand...
aah, i know how you feel, right down to the full stop.
 
RufusMcLaser

RufusMcLaser

New member
Mar 27, 2008
714
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Dear 15-year-old self,
Stop mooning after Rachel and ask Jessica out instead. You're in for a lonely, frustrating year otherwise.
P.S., buy a paintball mask instead of improvising with shop goggles. You'll thank me.

Dear 7-year-old self,
Nobody likes a smartass.
 
obex

obex

Gone Gonzo ..... no ..... wait..
Jun 18, 2009
343
0
0
Hi future self here

1. Invest enclosed money in stock for google and apple

2. wait a couple of years

3. Sell stocks before October 2008

4. ??????

5. Profit!
 
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