Injustice League Community Event: Valentine's Day

[NightmareWarden]

I'll sign up. Some of y'all just aren't manly enough to match-up with another man! Move beyond your societal restrictions to give other people frilly pink hearts of love! I have a potion that I'd like to commission to this "Injustice League" for this momentous occasion! Here is a taste of what everyone should prepare for:
Look, if you dare...

Spoiler

1. Take several strands off a witch's broom

2. Your metal of choice must be brought from the deepest pits of Tartarus to the skies of your limit

3. Pink food coloring
4. A lethal dosage of dihydrogen-monoxide

This should be more than enough for the entirety of the Escapist, let alone the forumgoers who decide to join in this momentous ceremony!

Edit: Oh how could I forget an image for my valentine. Here you are snoogums.

Spoiler: so much love I can't even handle it

So glad you're taking that stance, because now you're stuck with me. So, you go make the potion of loooovve and I'll go get the followers and chocolates. We can have our own suicide cult of Valentines!

The potion is done! Relax, this concoction is not a suppository. It cannot be taken orally, through the eyes, nor through the mail. NAY, it must be taken through the internet! Now after fiddling a lot to get this link to work, I present you with a valentine from me to you:

Spoiler

I give you my heart, still soaked in the waters of Eldritch fire! Kneel, I say! Kneel before the pretty colors!
Edit: My condolences to Daystar Clarion, I'm sure you must've been terribly saddened by the fact that your valentine was not Fappy.

 

[Nantucket_v1legacy]

LET'S DO THIS.
SIGN ME UP BITCHEZZZ.

You make me feel like the ugly ***** at the prom

 

[Patrick Buck]

LET'S DO THIS.
SIGN ME UP BITCHEZZZ.

You make me feel like the ugly ***** at the prom

I'm sorry honey, it's just that the buffet is more important to me right now. <3

 

[Basement Cat]

[snip]

Can I eat it?

Spoiler: I got you these, too.

[small][sub]Captcha: 'birthday girl'. Really?[/sub][/small]

Ah, the angst of Valentine's Day! It's brings back memories.

Some ironic.

Spoiler

Some cringe worthy.

Spoiler

I prefer the yummy!

Spoiler

[color=dark pink][HEADING=1]Pour Vous!!![/HEADING][/color]

 

[Goofguy]

I've heard a fair few poems in my day, let's see what you've got.

Then I can amaze (read: terrify) you with one that I come up with in five minutes.

[sub][sub]I'm not good at Valentine's stuff.[/sub][/sub]

*Ahem*, here we go.

There once was a guy named shrekfan246
Who kind of looked like Stevie Nicks
When it was Saint Valentine's Day
He looked for someone with whom to play
So time to show each other our d**ks


We all know that the best poetry is supposed to be risqué though maybe I took it too far...

 

[shrekfan246]

I've heard a fair few poems in my day, let's see what you've got.

Then I can amaze (read: terrify) you with one that I come up with in five minutes.

[sub][sub]I'm not good at Valentine's stuff.[/sub][/sub]

*Ahem*, here we go.

There once was a guy named shrekfan246
Who kind of looked like Stevie Nicks
When it was Saint Valentine's Day
He looked for someone with whom to play
So time to show each other our d**ks


We all know that the best poetry is supposed to be risqué though maybe I took it too far...

Quite the charmer you are, I'm not sure I'll be able to best that. But I must try!

Goofguy seemed like an aloof guy at first
As he refused to speak over dinner
But at the end of the date
What made him irate
Was the fact that I wasn't thinner.

Wait, that's not very romantic... let me try again.

Goofguy seemed like an aloof guy at first
As he refused to speak over dinner
But as the sun went down,
he said "Let's go to midtown!"
And proceeded to make me a sinner.

First thoughts for the follow-up to "as the sun went down" were far too risqué for me to post on this website... so I kept it PG-13.

 

[Goofguy]

*Ahem*, here we go.

There once was a guy named shrekfan246
Who kind of looked like Stevie Nicks
When it was Saint Valentine's Day
He looked for someone with whom to play
So time to show each other our d**ks


We all know that the best poetry is supposed to be risqué though maybe I took it too far...

Quite the charmer you are, I'm not sure I'll be able to best that. But I must try!

Goofguy seemed like an aloof guy at first
As he refused to speak over dinner
But at the end of the date
What made him irate
Was the fact that I wasn't thinner.

Wait, that's not very romantic... let me try again.

Goofguy seemed like an aloof guy at first
As he refused to speak over dinner
But as the sun went down,
he said "Let's go to midtown!"
And proceeded to make me a sinner.

First thoughts for the follow-up to "as the sun went down" were far too risqué for me to post on this website... so I kept it PG-13.

I bow my head in reverence to your great literary art skills. You have officially won Valentine's Day.

 

[Godhead]

-snip-

Oh you're so sweet. Anyways, I took the potion and now I'm feeling a little bit woozy. Is that normal and more importantly did you take yo-

 

[shrekfan246]

I bow my head in reverence to your great literary art skills. You have officially won Valentine's Day.

Woohoo! What's my prize? Is it chocolate, conveniently sorted in a heart-shaped box like a complete embodiment of the holiday?

Spoiler: I got one for you! :D

[sub][sub]Don't tell me you forgot the most stereotypical Valentine's Day gift! D:[/sub][/sub]

 

[Goofguy]

I bow my head in reverence to your great literary art skills. You have officially won Valentine's Day.

Woohoo! What's my prize? Is it chocolate, conveniently sorted in a heart-shaped box like a complete embodiment of the holiday?

Spoiler: I got one for you! :D

[sub][sub]Don't tell me you forgot the most stereotypical Valentine's Day gift! D:[/sub][/sub]

Because video game themed cards are evidently the most appropriate:

Spoiler: To the most important person in my life... today

 

[shrekfan246]

I bow my head in reverence to your great literary art skills. You have officially won Valentine's Day.

Woohoo! What's my prize? Is it chocolate, conveniently sorted in a heart-shaped box like a complete embodiment of the holiday?

Spoiler: I got one for you! :D

[sub][sub]Don't tell me you forgot the most stereotypical Valentine's Day gift! D:[/sub][/sub]

Because video game themed cards are evidently the most appropriate:

Spoiler: To the most important person in my life... today

In that case, have I got the card for you!

Spoiler

I can feel the love.

 

[Calibanbutcher]

My name was spelled wrong I want a new holiday! Also hey Yosharion, wanna get together and do hot steamy internet stuff?

It's 'Yosharian', doesn't make a good first impression when you get my name wrong buddy!

So I think this thread somewhat failed considering that I got matched with a dude

Not that I pointed out this problem in my original post or anything

Oh, come on...

There's lots of good stuff to do with dudes.

Most of it accompanied by music like this.

I just decided that I f*cking love you man...

 

[Goofguy]

I can feel the love.

I love you, man.

 

[Kae]

Everyone already loves me though.

Everyone is my valentine.

For serious?

Spoiler: In that case

No one says happy valentine's like Nicholas Cage.

It would seem you are my valentine, I am afraid I am rather unsure of what to do.

Don't worry, I know EXACTLY what to do.

Oh sorry it would seem I fell asleep, how typical, I think valentine's day is now over on Ireland, we can have post-valentine day fun though!

 

[xmbts]

Spoiler: Huh...

Maybe it will make more sense if I stare at it long enough.

 

[mikeybuthge]

My name was spelled wrong I want a new holiday! Also hey Yosharion, wanna get together and do hot steamy internet stuff?

It's 'Yosharian', doesn't make a good first impression when you get my name wrong buddy!

So I think this thread somewhat failed considering that I got matched with a dude

Not that I pointed out this problem in my original post or anything

Y'know, there's nothing wrong with being matched with a dude, it's not like we live in the same area and can meet up, at worst, it'd be just like chat roulette.

 

[mikeybuthge]

My name was spelled wrong I want a new holiday! Also hey Yosharion, wanna get together and do hot steamy internet stuff?

It's 'Yosharian', doesn't make a good first impression when you get my name wrong buddy!

So I think this thread somewhat failed considering that I got matched with a dude

Not that I pointed out this problem in my original post or anything

Y'know, there's nothing wrong with being matched with a dude, it's not like we live in the same area and can meet up, at worst, it'd be just like chat roulette.

There'd be nothing wrong with it if I was Bi or Gay, sure.

We'll get a girl, it's not gay if it's in a three way, according to The Lonely Island anyways