Insult Swordfighting!
- Thread starter General Mostly Electrified Steel
- Start date
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*cuts free of vines and pulls a small knife out, throwing it while continuing to strike*
Your mum was so fat kids have sponsored walks round her
Your mum was so fat kids have sponsored walks round her
I quickly dodge to the side, and snatch the blade from the air as it whizzes past.
"Yes, well your mother is so fat, she's literally beside herself."
"Yes, well your mother is so fat, she's literally beside herself."
*strikes quickly while adding a flurry of blows*
I saw your mum walking round the other day and she fell over, i didnt want to laugh but the ground was cracking up!
I saw your mum walking round the other day and she fell over, i didnt want to laugh but the ground was cracking up!
I return the dagger to you with a deft flick of my wrist.
"My mother's girth may make the ground crack up, but you're the labrador's black pup!"
"My mother's girth may make the ground crack up, but you're the labrador's black pup!"
I slice the burger in two as it hurtles towards me.
"Well, sir, that insult was quite base!"
Have at thee, cow-herd!
"Well, sir, that insult was quite base!"
Have at thee, cow-herd!
Bermy, leaning on his broadsword a short distance away, surveys the melee that has seemingly degenerated into a mass of insults regarding incest, homosexuality, and references to each other's mothers (whether sexual or not). He sighs and wonders aloud:
"Do I dare even lower myself to take part in this poor excuse for a verbal brawl?"
"Do I dare even lower myself to take part in this poor excuse for a verbal brawl?"
I catch wind of bermy's disdainful comments and hurl a ball of eldritch energies at his location.
"You, sir, are a fop! The very and last, final top!"
"You, sir, are a fop! The very and last, final top!"
As Free watches from afar he decides to pour gasoline on this poor excuse for a fire
''Hey gems! I heard bermy bragging about what he did to your mum the other night!''
''Hey gems! I heard bermy bragging about what he did to your mum the other night!''
*I wake up after the faint caused by the shoulder injury and attempt to hit General in the head with a lamp, while screaming
LEEROY JENKINS!!!! Oh, and your mother is so fat she needs a bumerang just to close her belt.
*faints of tiredom. Be back tomorrow.
LEEROY JENKINS!!!! Oh, and your mother is so fat she needs a bumerang just to close her belt.
*faints of tiredom. Be back tomorrow.
Falling from the sky, The Logician throws a fury of shorukens, decimating everyone in the field (except AlmightyJoe, who's sleeping) who immediately fall to the ground, shocked from his awesome entrance. As he lands and rises to his feet, he porclaims, with resolve and diginity;
"You call this a verbal melee? I've seen imbred swine with more wit then this!"
"You call this a verbal melee? I've seen imbred swine with more wit then this!"
*Brazenhead89 leaps into the fray, gritted teeth and bulging eyes*
"I've seen reservoirs drier than your futile attempts at humour!"
"I've seen reservoirs drier than your futile attempts at humour!"
*MilitantFurry leaps into the fray, armed with Eviscerators*
Puny fools! Your insults are mere whore's farts, you syphilitic cumguzzling sons of gonohorric camels! 'Twould be base failure even to spit in your general direction! Come, you sons of monkeys! Your mothers have fallen to my lust; now your blood shall fall to my blades! HAVE AT THEE!
Puny fools! Your insults are mere whore's farts, you syphilitic cumguzzling sons of gonohorric camels! 'Twould be base failure even to spit in your general direction! Come, you sons of monkeys! Your mothers have fallen to my lust; now your blood shall fall to my blades! HAVE AT THEE!
Without losing step, The Logician draws his katana and spins, decapatating Brazenhead89. As Brazenhead89's body falls to the ground, The Logician utters,
"Didn't I just say that? It really agitates me when people steal my lines."
He then draws another throwing spear and throws it at MilitantFurry, puncturing his heart.
"My mother may be a dirty hooker, but nothing she does is as bad as what you did to your dad the other night; and I have pictures to prove it."
"Didn't I just say that? It really agitates me when people steal my lines."
He then draws another throwing spear and throws it at MilitantFurry, puncturing his heart.
"My mother may be a dirty hooker, but nothing she does is as bad as what you did to your dad the other night; and I have pictures to prove it."
*MilitantFurry pulls the spear from his chest and roars in fury, the hole blazing with eldritch fire as it heals over, the spear exploding in his paw.*
"Hah! You see the truth...wait, my father? Funny, my father is happily dead these many years, as will shortly be any chance of your winning." With this, MilitantFurry grabs a chunk of concrete and sets it aflame, throwing it bodily at The_Logician before leaping atop it, jumping from it to decapitate The_Logician and leaping away, Eviscerator chain reddened, The_Logician's body smashed into the ground by the lump of man-made rock.
"Thy insults are as limp and saggy as thy mother's pussy."
"Hah! You see the truth...wait, my father? Funny, my father is happily dead these many years, as will shortly be any chance of your winning." With this, MilitantFurry grabs a chunk of concrete and sets it aflame, throwing it bodily at The_Logician before leaping atop it, jumping from it to decapitate The_Logician and leaping away, Eviscerator chain reddened, The_Logician's body smashed into the ground by the lump of man-made rock.
"Thy insults are as limp and saggy as thy mother's pussy."
Holding back the laughing fit, The Logician smashes the rock into pices, leaps up, throws ten shorukens at MilitantFurry, falls to the ground, and slices the man in half. Then, for safe measure, he cuts him into little cubes, all the while saying,
"Eww, he was dead! That's even grosser! And your sword is about as sharp as your wit, which is as sharp as...this is where I would make a penis joke, but, cmon, your dead father? And about my mom's genetalia; she's a hooker, whaddaya expect?"
The Logician then apologizes to all the little pices of Militantfurry for insulting his mother and dead father and cutting him to pieces,
"Eww, he was dead! That's even grosser! And your sword is about as sharp as your wit, which is as sharp as...this is where I would make a penis joke, but, cmon, your dead father? And about my mom's genetalia; she's a hooker, whaddaya expect?"
The Logician then apologizes to all the little pices of Militantfurry for insulting his mother and dead father and cutting him to pieces,
Bermyduck, whose witty reply was momentarily cut off due to a shruiken in the throat, pulls it free and replies to Swift:
"but my good sir, Gems mother is a llama!"
Deftly ignoring the squabble between a feminine looking logician, and a necro militant, bermy pitches camp and retires for the evening.
"but my good sir, Gems mother is a llama!"
Deftly ignoring the squabble between a feminine looking logician, and a necro militant, bermy pitches camp and retires for the evening.