Is it selfish to prevent people from commiting suicide?

[JoJo]

ok first things first please think about things before you say them idiot. I personally was stopped from killing myself just a few months ago by a person who i almost never talk to and dont know at all. but she saved my life and made sure i got the help i needed. im better off for it now. im not gonna say that stopping someone is right. im still mad she did it but im still here because of it. if everyone was like you, ie. stupid and ignorant there would be alot more dead people in the world.

Great first post, it's good to have input from someone so close to the issue :-D

Welcome to the Escapist by the way, stick by the rules and don't go into the basement and you should do just fine here!

 

[Lilani]

No. You're not doing it for yourself. That's what selfishness is.

Very well put.

See, to me, suicide is about the most selfish thing any person can do. You're leaving your family, your friends, and everyone who knew and cared about you not knowing what they could have done. You're leaving them with a kind of anxiety and guilt that can never be cured or resolved. For the rest of their life they will wonder what they could have done to help you, and will regret everything negative they ever did or said to you. Even if it's just one person, you are causing them emotional pain that is easily prevented.

Not to mention you're saddling them with the trouble of dealing all of your financial burdens, your belongings, your funeral, your body, and the investigation that will ensue to make sure it was a suicide. That stuff takes a long, long time to resolve. My dad is currently dealing with the estate of a cousin of his who died of cancer this last spring. When he said he would do the job, he didn't realize how much there was to do. He's spent the last five months going through every paper, receipt, legal document, and belonging of this man. And even when the estate, finances, and belongings are finally processed, there's still a trust he'll have to babysit for the next three years because one of the beneficiaries is under 21. Medical bills are still coming in, and only a week or so ago did an insurance policy decide to kick in to help pay for his mortgage (they've spent the five few months trying to determine if he knew he had cancer when he got the policy).

And that's not even a suicide. At least the man had a will and kept his things relatively organized, and they were mentally prepared for it. Though my dad still says he was not expecting this kind of a workload, and he will never, EVER do it again for anyone.

 

[Doctor Glocktor]

If you're so much of a coward that instead of actually trying to make your life better, you take the easy way out, you can do that. Its just that you're hurting everyone around you. Are you really that bloody selfish?

It doesn't matter if someone is doing it for reasons of cowardice or if it's selfish, it's still their choice to make. It's their life to throw away, and they aren't obligated in any way to keep living if they don't want to.

And yes, if I had a reason to kill myself I'd do it without the slightest thought about what others might think or feel about my decision. Because it is just that, MY decision. There's no argument or discussion to be had there. And it doesn't really matter if you or anyone else were to judge me, calling me a coward or selfish because it's not like I'd be alive and thus able to care aboyt your petty criticism now is it?

Petty criticism? Nice one. But still, I'm not saying that it isn't your choice to make. What I AM saying is that you should wake up and realize that taking the easy way out is hurting everyone around you. I assume, even with your attitude, you must have some people that would care if you died, yes? Do you not care at all about the harm you inflict on them by your cowardice?

 

[Rol3x]

It takes a hell of alot of emotional anguish to be able to commit suicide the vast majority of the time, alot of suicidal people are mentally ill and alot of those cases are treatable. If a person had a treatable disease that would kill them, why wouldnt you prevent thier death?
If theres the argument that they dont have a mental illness and want to die anyway, I'd be damn sure a psychiatrist agreed before letting a possibly preventable death just happen.

 

[debossman21]

freedom of choice. if some guy decides its time to meet his maker, he can have at it. but personally, i would go die somewhere not messing with anyone's day.

 

[kaioxs]

I think Mr Pip has something to say on the subject.

 

[Kevlar Eater]

I personally detest the people that think suicide is selfish. They are no doubt the same people that believe in the right to free speech as long as the viewpoints are similar.

And yes, I believe that suicide prevention is selfish. If someone believes they are at the end of their rope and letting go is the only way to fix their problems, let them drop. Who knows? Perhaps the person who wanted to die is more of a burden alive than dead.

 

[emeraldrafael]

No, but then again i dont believe in stopping anyone from killing themselves.

if you're weak enough to consider it, then there's no point in stopping, cause you're just prolonging the event. Face your inner demon and get over them or let them crush you, just dont expect help in doing so.

 

[Superior Mind]

While I agree to a certain extent that a person should have the right to determine what happens to their own life, (for example I support euthanasia,) there are few things more selfish than suicide. The thing is so many suicides are spur-of-the-moment things caused by passing moments of depresion or unfortunate cirumstances. The decision to commit suicide is rarely one that is rational, sometimes people in this situation just need a hand to get over a rough patch. I speak as someone who has actually stood in the way of someone trying to commit suicide, (I have the scars to prove it,) and the person in question, who was in a really really bad place at the time, has since recovered and is enjoyng life to a degree that at that particular point of time they couldn't even imagine. Do I feel selfish getting in the way of another person's so-called right to do themselves in? Fuck no. And I can say with some certainty that I don't think the person in question feels like I did them any wrong either, (in fact quite the opposite.)

What was that statistic speaking to how many people who jumped from the Golden Gate bridge regretted their decision on the way down? Pretty much all of them I think. Ken Baldwin, who jumped off in 1985 but survived, later recalled that in letting go from the railing he "instantly realised that everything in my life that I?d thought was unfixable was totally fixable ? except for having just jumped.? Imagine how many of those who chose to take their own life just needed somone to step in and help them. Then you tell me whether you still think acting in defence of an incredibly vulnerable person without any concern for your own safety is 'selfish'.

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

No. I don't think that preventing suicide is selfish, neither is committing it. Whilst admittedly I find the latter increadibly foolish and impetuous I wouldn't be so fucking callous as to call it a selfish act. One of my cousin's closest friends committed suicide pretty recently. He was a really nice guy who on the surface appeared very cheerful, you'd never think him morose but I can understand many people are reticent about their depressive state which left his parents oblivious to what was happening inside his head or what they could have done. Most people I don't think really want to end it all, they want help, they want something, anything to pull them out of the bleak, vapid and meaningless existence that has become of thier life but can't bring themselves to ask for help. But that's just my perspective, for whatever that's worth.

 

[Housebroken Lunatic]

Petty criticism? Nice one. But still, I'm not saying that it isn't your choice to make. What I AM saying is that you should wake up and realize that taking the easy way out is hurting everyone around you. I assume, even with your attitude, you must have some people that would care if you died, yes? Do you not care at all about the harm you inflict on them by your cowardice?

Whether it's an "easy" way out or not is debateable. I'd argue that the view that suicide is an "easy" decision is a pretty narrow and ignorant one to say the least.

But to answer your question: the way I see it, if I actually reached a point where suicide seemed like a reasonable option, then there wouldn't really be any coming back from that, and the pressing concerns making me consider it would be of such grave magnitude that they would be flat out impossible to just "solve" by keeping myself alive.

Also, im going to die someday anyway, whether I want to or not. So people that care if I die will eventually have to be stricken by grief one way or the other anyway. And because of that fact, it seems kind of meaningless to worry about others feelings in regards to my possible suicide, because someones feelings will be hurt regardless. I mean, I'll be dead regardless if I choose it myself or not, so the only real concern here is the trivial matter of a certain time-span (i.e whether I die "now" or "later"), and I don't really think it's too much to get hung up over.

 

[Shoggoth2588]

Too many variables...far, far too many variables. Dumbledore's death was acceptable even though that was technically suicide but there was only one Dumbledore (in a fictional universe)

The freedom of choice argument is compelling. If I knew I had a choice between months of painful, incurable face-cancer (as an example) or a quick death by my own hands, I'd take the more creative way out (in my case, marathon gaming session. The tragedy will be me dying during the final boss fight in Mystic Quest)

Also, I think there's an active sect or, belief group who consider a person who kills themself after having lost a loved one (as in, love not family member) to be heroic or, tragic or something.

As has been said though, the issue is really, really tricky. I don't want to say yes or no because of all of the variables. I can see how it would be acceptable though, to commit suicide and, I can see how it would be acceptable to prevent suicide.

 

[WouldYouKindly]

If it's someone important in your life, it's enlightened self-interest. You help them and get something in return, namely them.

If it's someone you don't know, it's a bit more altruistic.

For people who are terminally ill, I've always said they should be able to choose when they go. The only difference between today and next week is a shit load of pain, why not make it today?

 

[burningdragoon]

Sure it's selfish, but so what? It's not any more selfish than the act itself. Why?

No. You're not doing it for yourself. That's what selfishness is.

Very well put.

See, to me, suicide is about the most selfish thing any person can do. You're leaving your family, your friends, and everyone who knew and cared about you not knowing what they could have done. You're leaving them with a kind of anxiety and guilt that can never be cured or resolved. For the rest of their life they will wonder what they could have done to help you, and will regret everything negative they ever did or said to you. Even if it's just one person, you are causing them emotional pain that is easily prevented.

Not to mention you're saddling them with the trouble of dealing all of your financial burdens, your belongings, your funeral, your body, and the investigation that will ensue to make sure it was a suicide. That stuff takes a long, long time to resolve. My dad is currently dealing with the estate of a cousin of his who died of cancer this last spring. When he said he would do the job, he didn't realize how much there was to do. He's spent the last five months going through every paper, receipt, legal document, and belonging of this man. And even when the estate, finances, and belongings are finally processed, there's still a trust he'll have to babysit for the next three years because one of the beneficiaries is under 21. Medical bills are still coming in, and only a week or so ago did an insurance policy decide to kick in to help pay for his mortgage (they've spent the five few months trying to determine if he knew he had cancer when he got the policy).

And that's not even a suicide. At least the man had a will and kept his things relatively organized, and they were mentally prepared for it. Though my dad still says he was not expecting this kind of a workload, and he will never, EVER do it again for anyone.

That's why.

 

[4173]

If you're so much of a coward that instead of actually trying to make your life better, you take the easy way out, you can do that. Its just that you're hurting everyone around you. Are you really that bloody selfish?

It doesn't matter if someone is doing it for reasons of cowardice or if it's selfish, it's still their choice to make. It's their life to throw away, and they aren't obligated in any way to keep living if they don't want to.

And yes, if I had a reason to kill myself I'd do it without the slightest thought about what others might think or feel about my decision. Because it is just that, MY decision. There's no argument or discussion to be had there. And it doesn't really matter if you or anyone else were to judge me, calling me a coward or selfish because it's not like I'd be alive and thus able to care aboyt your petty criticism now is it?

Petty criticism? Nice one. But still, I'm not saying that it isn't your choice to make. What I AM saying is that you should wake up and realize that taking the easy way out is hurting everyone around you. I assume, even with your attitude, you must have some people that would care if you died, yes? Do you not care at all about the harm you inflict on them by your cowardice?

I'm curious, is there a tipping point? Debilitating chronic pain or inevitable loss of all mental faculties?

 

[Housebroken Lunatic]

It takes a hell of alot of emotional anguish to be able to commit suicide the vast majority of the time, alot of suicidal people are mentally ill and alot of those cases are treatable. If a person had a treatable disease that would kill them, why wouldnt you prevent thier death?
If theres the argument that they dont have a mental illness and want to die anyway, I'd be damn sure a psychiatrist agreed before letting a possibly preventable death just happen.

Well considering that the "scientific" lads who dabble in psychology pretty much write off ANY suicidal thinking as being the product of mental illness, we can't really scientifically pinpoint whether all or even most suicidal people are actually mentally ill and that this illness is the cause of their suicidal behaviour.

It's kind of like the problem with a depression. The clinical definition of what a depression is (in tangible terms) is that it is a "chemical imbalance in the subject's brain chemistry". Well guess what? SO IS HAPPINESS!

Happiness is just as much a chemical imbalance in your brain chemistry as a depression is, so why is it that happiness isn't considered a mental illness but a depression is? It's all pretty arbitrary and far from scientific deductions when you think about it.

And then there's a problem determining WHY a person is suffering from a depression. Is it because "sad stuff happened" and this caused the chemical imbalance in question, or is the chemical imbalance in question just a natural reaction that a person experience when "sad stuff" occurs?

To summarize: there's a lot of dubious and very non-scientific concepts in the discipline of study we know as "psychology", which we are being made to think that it's "all science" (even when it's clearly the opposite of science).

And I can tell you this much: if you saw a psychiatrist and told him/her that you were thinking of suicide they'd actually run the risk of being prosicuted for malpractice if they DIDN'T try to convince you that you suffered from some sort of mental illness for thinking of ending your own life.

So really, how would you REALLY know if someone who is suicidal is mentally ill or perfectly sane in an objective sense?

 

[Dawns Gate]

Depends on the situation, if it is just a single person - no one else dependent on them - then you should could care less. If it is like what happened to a friend of mine where his dad and then his uncle - who became his guardian - committed suicide within a few weeks of each other, then we have a problem and it is not selfish to stop them.

 

[vesago]

as a chatholic i'm against suiside in theroy at least but there is a line I also belelive in the iron hammer of darwin whitch inculdes "self destructive behavior is removed from the gene pool through it's own self destruction" yes it's not that black and white but explain to me why we should keep the guy from trying to shove his peep in a wall socet from reeping the benifits therof is getting us any closer to the whole of the human race from becoming Homo-supior