Just what are "Daddy Issues"?

[Synigma]

Yahtzee is probably sick of seeing a major motivation for female characters in video games (and other media) having something to do with her father, regardless of it being a good or bad relationship.

This just means video games need better writing.

If I remember correctly this was shortly after or right before he did a piece on the father figure in games being over done now. So maybe he was just focusing on that because it was fresh on his mind.

 

[Disco Biscuit]

Anyone here ever met some long-time strippers and/or prostitutes who weren't drug addicts? Those are the extreme end of "Daddy issues".

 

[Gorrath]

It's a combination of things, like the extension of Freudian theories (Oedipus/Electra complex), the effect of the parent of the opposite sex on providing a model for interaction with members of that sex, the dynamic of the family, social norms/traditions/conditioning etc. It's not exclusive to women, though it's usually attributed to women. Men get "mommy issues" just as often.

Yeah, that is the thing I think is way too overstated. Like ridiculously so. I grew up in a house full of women but I've never struggled to interact with men. It's not like I was there like "Bwuh? A man? How to I communicate with this being? What language does it speak?". Hyperbolic, but you get me.

I'm not saying it has absolutely zero affect, but I don't think it's particularly important for most people. But again, grew up in a house of one gender, so I guess I am Teh Biased in that regard, which I'll admit.

I think it's both over stated but also a thing, in the same way that people call me a "momma's boy" just because I have a really good, affectionate relationship with my mother. I think the whole idea that we are seeking surrogates for parents that were, paradoxically, too close or too distant is over played. The idea that any woman who seeks the approval of a man in a romantic relationship has "daddy issues" seems like nonsense, as does the claim that any man who seeks similar approval/love from their female romantic partner.

The concept of "Daddy Issues" seems to me to be the assertion that any woman with a low self esteem who mitigates that by seeking the approval of men (presumably because she's attracted to them.) It's an overly broad term that works off of unfounded assumptions.

 

[happyninja42]

Aaaaactually, Roth taught her to defend herself and whatnot and that's Roth's voice doing the yur a Crawft bits.

Oh shit, you're right. I totally forgot that guy wasn't actually her dad.

Something that is often described as "daddy issues" is someone who goes about searching for surrogate father figure to replace a absent, neglectful or abusive actual father. Fill the emotional void or whatever. Which Lara from the new games kinda... does? I guess?

Yeah, I'd say it does fit with Reboot Lara, I just totally forgot that guy who died at the beginning wasn't actually her dad, he was so firmly slotted into the Daddy role, my brain just fused the two. Given I brain dumped most of the details of that game, I forgot about it.

In the new Mirror's Edge Faith's father is absent (due to being dead, in flashbacks and documents and such he's depicted as being an all round good guy) and she has an unofficial adoptive father. They're shown to care for one another a great deal. Never really occurred to me to think of it as daddy issues, but there you go.

I 'unno, Yahtzee might just be being flippant. Or he's run into one too many chicks with daddy issues and now sees it everywhere. Who knows.

Well that's why I brought up the subject, because it seemed like he was using it a little incorrectly, though with you pointing out that her dad was actually missing, and Roth was her surrogate, I guess it does fit more than I thought.

 

[happyninja42]

It's a combination of things, like the extension of Freudian theories (Oedipus/Electra complex), the effect of the parent of the opposite sex on providing a model for interaction with members of that sex, the dynamic of the family, social norms/traditions/conditioning etc. It's not exclusive to women, though it's usually attributed to women. Men get "mommy issues" just as often.

Yeah, that is the thing I think is way too overstated. Like ridiculously so. I grew up in a house full of women but I've never struggled to interact with men. It's not like I was there like "Bwuh? A man? How to I communicate with this being? What language does it speak?". Hyperbolic, but you get me.

I'm not saying it has absolutely zero affect, but I don't think it's particularly important for most people. But again, grew up in a house of one gender, so I guess I am Teh Biased in that regard, which I'll admit.

I think it's both over stated but also a thing, in the same way that people call me a "momma's boy" just because I have a really good, affectionate relationship with my mother. I think the whole idea that we are seeking surrogates for parents that were, paradoxically, too close or too distant is over played. The idea that any woman who seeks the approval of a man in a romantic relationship has "daddy issues" seems like nonsense, as does the claim that any man who seeks similar approval/love from their female romantic partner.

The concept of "Daddy Issues" seems to me to be the assertion that any woman with a low self esteem who mitigates that by seeking the approval of men (presumably because she's attracted to them.) It's an overly broad term that works off of unfounded assumptions.

What I find funny about the "Momma's Boy" and "Daddy's Girl" perception, is how a Momma's Boy is almost always looked on negatively, but a girl who loves her Daddy, and is thus a "Daddy's Girl"...well that's perfectly fine. It's a funny bit of double standard there.

 

[Fox12]

Women who have emotional baggage related to their fathers, particularly if the dad was a bad parent.

I've heard people call the trope sexist if it's used in fiction, but I don't think that's entirely fair, since it's something that happens in real life. Go read about Sylvia Plath. She followed the stereotypes to a T. She even married a cheating douchebag that reminded her of her father.

 

[Gorrath]

It's a combination of things, like the extension of Freudian theories (Oedipus/Electra complex), the effect of the parent of the opposite sex on providing a model for interaction with members of that sex, the dynamic of the family, social norms/traditions/conditioning etc. It's not exclusive to women, though it's usually attributed to women. Men get "mommy issues" just as often.

Yeah, that is the thing I think is way too overstated. Like ridiculously so. I grew up in a house full of women but I've never struggled to interact with men. It's not like I was there like "Bwuh? A man? How to I communicate with this being? What language does it speak?". Hyperbolic, but you get me.

I'm not saying it has absolutely zero affect, but I don't think it's particularly important for most people. But again, grew up in a house of one gender, so I guess I am Teh Biased in that regard, which I'll admit.

I think it's both over stated but also a thing, in the same way that people call me a "momma's boy" just because I have a really good, affectionate relationship with my mother. I think the whole idea that we are seeking surrogates for parents that were, paradoxically, too close or too distant is over played. The idea that any woman who seeks the approval of a man in a romantic relationship has "daddy issues" seems like nonsense, as does the claim that any man who seeks similar approval/love from their female romantic partner.

The concept of "Daddy Issues" seems to me to be the assertion that any woman with a low self esteem who mitigates that by seeking the approval of men (presumably because she's attracted to them.) It's an overly broad term that works off of unfounded assumptions.

What I find funny about the "Momma's Boy" and "Daddy's Girl" perception, is how a Momma's Boy is almost always looked on negatively, but a girl who loves her Daddy, and is thus a "Daddy's Girl"...well that's perfectly fine. It's a funny bit of double standard there.

Oh sure, and I think that derives from the idea that men are supposed to be liberated and independent or else they look weak and unappealing where as women were expected to be sweet to the men that provided for them. Gender roles and all that, different but problematic for both genders.

I think the double standard comes in that we've pushed hard to abolish the idea that women are passive and dependent and sought to make it so women who have a career or stay at home are both validated in their choices where as men who don't have a job for long stretches are still largely considered deadbeats and man-children. To each their own, I say.

 

[Disco Biscuit]

Women who have emotional baggage related to their fathers, particularly if the dad was a bad parent.

I've heard people call the trope sexist if it's used in fiction, but I don't think that's entirely fair, since it's something that happens in real life. Go read about Sylvia Plath. She followed the stereotypes to a T. She even married a cheating douche age that reminded her of her father.

Male, female, or other, most people live in some rough approximation of how they were raised, or in active rebellion.

 

[happyninja42]

It's a combination of things, like the extension of Freudian theories (Oedipus/Electra complex), the effect of the parent of the opposite sex on providing a model for interaction with members of that sex, the dynamic of the family, social norms/traditions/conditioning etc. It's not exclusive to women, though it's usually attributed to women. Men get "mommy issues" just as often.

Yeah, that is the thing I think is way too overstated. Like ridiculously so. I grew up in a house full of women but I've never struggled to interact with men. It's not like I was there like "Bwuh? A man? How to I communicate with this being? What language does it speak?". Hyperbolic, but you get me.

I'm not saying it has absolutely zero affect, but I don't think it's particularly important for most people. But again, grew up in a house of one gender, so I guess I am Teh Biased in that regard, which I'll admit.

I think it's both over stated but also a thing, in the same way that people call me a "momma's boy" just because I have a really good, affectionate relationship with my mother. I think the whole idea that we are seeking surrogates for parents that were, paradoxically, too close or too distant is over played. The idea that any woman who seeks the approval of a man in a romantic relationship has "daddy issues" seems like nonsense, as does the claim that any man who seeks similar approval/love from their female romantic partner.

The concept of "Daddy Issues" seems to me to be the assertion that any woman with a low self esteem who mitigates that by seeking the approval of men (presumably because she's attracted to them.) It's an overly broad term that works off of unfounded assumptions.

What I find funny about the "Momma's Boy" and "Daddy's Girl" perception, is how a Momma's Boy is almost always looked on negatively, but a girl who loves her Daddy, and is thus a "Daddy's Girl"...well that's perfectly fine. It's a funny bit of double standard there.

Oh sure, and I think that derives from the idea that men are supposed to be liberated and independent or else they look weak and unappealing where as women were expected to be sweet to the men that provided for them. Gender roles and all that, different but problematic for both genders.

I think the double standard comes in that we've pushed hard to abolish the idea that women are passive and dependent and sought to make it so women who have a career or stay at home are both validated in their choices where as men who don't have a job for long stretches are still largely considered deadbeats and man-children. To each their own, I say.

Yeah but even that description you give about what a Momma's Boy is, is more negative than a Daddy's Girl. Momma's Boy is apparently a dead beat guy who still lives with his mom, as if this is automatic. But a Daddy's Girl isn't apparently. And not just that, I've seen lots of movies and tv shows, where they clearly establish that the woman falls for some guy, who is almost a carbon copy of her father, sometimes even making similar statements, and their relationship is ok. An example, Jodi Foster's character from Contact, hooks up with the gigilo christian guy, after he says exactly the same phrase as her father about other life in the universe. And this is ok. But if a movie shows a guy hooking up with a woman that is similar to his mom, he has to go through this big "growing up" arc, because clearly he's just looking for a replacement mommy. I just...it annoys me.

 

[Qizx]

I think everyone has explained it clearly. All I will add is an expression.

I find it really uncomfortable when a girl/woman calls her boyfriend or husband, "daddy". I would not find that any bit of a turn on if my other half did that. Just no.

Does that link to daddy issues?

Man I agree with that SO much. If I was getting it on with my GF and she mentioned something about "daddy" or whatnot it would immediately kill the mood. It's something I don't get, will never get, and frankly find weird.

 

[Disco Biscuit]

It's a combination of things, like the extension of Freudian theories (Oedipus/Electra complex), the effect of the parent of the opposite sex on providing a model for interaction with members of that sex, the dynamic of the family, social norms/traditions/conditioning etc. It's not exclusive to women, though it's usually attributed to women. Men get "mommy issues" just as often.

Yeah, that is the thing I think is way too overstated. Like ridiculously so. I grew up in a house full of women but I've never struggled to interact with men. It's not like I was there like "Bwuh? A man? How to I communicate with this being? What language does it speak?". Hyperbolic, but you get me.

I'm not saying it has absolutely zero affect, but I don't think it's particularly important for most people. But again, grew up in a house of one gender, so I guess I am Teh Biased in that regard, which I'll admit.

I think it's both over stated but also a thing, in the same way that people call me a "momma's boy" just because I have a really good, affectionate relationship with my mother. I think the whole idea that we are seeking surrogates for parents that were, paradoxically, too close or too distant is over played. The idea that any woman who seeks the approval of a man in a romantic relationship has "daddy issues" seems like nonsense, as does the claim that any man who seeks similar approval/love from their female romantic partner.

The concept of "Daddy Issues" seems to me to be the assertion that any woman with a low self esteem who mitigates that by seeking the approval of men (presumably because she's attracted to them.) It's an overly broad term that works off of unfounded assumptions.

What I find funny about the "Momma's Boy" and "Daddy's Girl" perception, is how a Momma's Boy is almost always looked on negatively, but a girl who loves her Daddy, and is thus a "Daddy's Girl"...well that's perfectly fine. It's a funny bit of double standard there.

Oh sure, and I think that derives from the idea that men are supposed to be liberated and independent or else they look weak and unappealing where as women were expected to be sweet to the men that provided for them. Gender roles and all that, different but problematic for both genders.

I think the double standard comes in that we've pushed hard to abolish the idea that women are passive and dependent and sought to make it so women who have a career or stay at home are both validated in their choices where as men who don't have a job for long stretches are still largely considered deadbeats and man-children. To each their own, I say.

Yeah but even that description you give about what a Momma's Boy is, is more negative than a Daddy's Girl. Momma's Boy is apparently a dead beat guy who still lives with his mom, as if this is automatic. But a Daddy's Girl isn't apparently. And not just that, I've seen lots of movies and tv shows, where they clearly establish that the woman falls for some guy, who is almost a carbon copy of her father, sometimes even making similar statements, and their relationship is ok. An example, Jodi Foster's character from Contact, hooks up with the gigilo christian guy, after he says exactly the same phrase as her father about other life in the universe. And this is ok. But if a movie shows a guy hooking up with a woman that is similar to his mom, he has to go through this big "growing up" arc, because clearly he's just looking for a replacement mommy. I just...it annoys me.

Maybe it's just one of those things that's actually different between the sexes?

 

[deadish]

Yahtzee is probably sick of seeing a major motivation for female characters in video games (and other media) having something to do with her father, regardless of it being a good or bad relationship.

This just means video games need better writing.

That said though ... What are the motivations of a typical woman? (That people can sort of identify with?)

Will any of them convince a young lady to risk life and limb in the middle of nowhere, climb mountains, and dealing with thugs?

 

[Evonisia]

Basically "Daddy didn't love me enough" being a key character motivation as most have pointed out in this thread.

It's not really in the original "Tomb Raider" reboot, her father was more of a figure that enriched her background. In "Rise of the Tomb Raider" Lara can't go five minutes without bringing up about how she has to live up to her father and avenge him, and while we do see him with her in flashbacks, it's hammered in that his work tore him away from everyone. Her sole motivation is doing something her neglectful father would be proud of.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

That said though ... What are the motivations of a typical woman? (That people can sort of identify with?)

Will any of them convince a young lady to risk life and limb in the middle of nowhere, climb mountains, and dealing with thugs?

There are only a handful of motivations I imagine could propel any character to risk life and limb. Realistically, you'd have to be feeling pretty strongly about something to put your life on the line for it. I also believe most of those motivations are not particularly gender exclusive, for example, if you murder a women's entire family, she's just as likely to want revenge as a man in the same situation.

 

[Zacharious-khan]

They are particular periodical entries, such as a magazine or newspaper, that pretain specifically to fathers and father related accessories.

 

[springheeljack]

It's just another weak way of trying to explain why a character does something that's all it is

 

[Captain Marvelous_v1legacy]

The definition has been explained already so I'll just give an example. This guy:

[small]The Arkham Knight AKA Saw That Coming From A Mile Away[/small]​

Has MAJOR daddy issues. And so does the Riddler.

Yeah but even that description you give about what a Momma's Boy is, is more negative than a Daddy's Girl. Momma's Boy is apparently a dead beat guy who still lives with his mom, as if this is automatic. But a Daddy's Girl isn't apparently. And not just that, I've seen lots of movies and tv shows, where they clearly establish that the woman falls for some guy, who is almost a carbon copy of her father, sometimes even making similar statements, and their relationship is ok. An example, Jodi Foster's character from Contact, hooks up with the gigilo christian guy, after he says exactly the same phrase as her father about other life in the universe. And this is ok. But if a movie shows a guy hooking up with a woman that is similar to his mom, he has to go through this big "growing up" arc, because clearly he's just looking for a replacement mommy. I just...it annoys me.

The way I see it, a Momma's Boy isn't a deadbeat, just a guy who is "overly attached" to his mother. He's a guy who spends a lot of time with his mother or, if they don't live together, he calls her almost every day. My uncles are mama's boys, and they're proud of it. Being a Mama's Boy just means the guy's mom is one of the most, if not the most, important women in his life and he treats her that way. No one's ever told me, or hinted, that a Mama's Boy is a deadbeat that relies on his mom.

 

[Hawki]

"Daddy issues" is, I think a term of beratement when character motivation is driven by them and the plot feels hackneyed as a result. It's not inherently bad though. Tyrion Lannister has daddy issues, but they're understandable, and he's an engaging character regardless. Off the top of my head, Luke, from Percy Jackson, is an example of this done less well. His frustration with Hermes is understandable, but they're still "daddy issues" that result in him serving Kronos. I know, Kronos partially corrupts him, and I've only read the first book (still a good book mind you), but they come off as far more hackneyed than the Tyrion example).

Best example I can think of comes from 40k (lots of daddy issues there), with Lorgar. He spent basically his entire life trying to get people to worship his dad, constructing massive temples to his dad, writing a religious book about his dad and constantly being told by his dad that he wasn't a god and that there is no such thing as gods. Eventually Lorgar got so bad that his dad had to slap some sense into him by getting his brother to burn one of his favorite temple cities to the ground, leveling the entire planet. Lorgar then realising that his daddy never loved him goes of to destroy his daddy's empire by worshiping daemons instead.

Except...that's not it. It's a humorous version of it (and feel free to point out if you are being humorous), but it runs deeper than that. Lorgar and the Emperor ultimately clash over ideals. The Emperor preached the Imperial God - science and rationality are the way, he isn't a god, mankind must rise above such superstition). Lorgar believed that faith was the way to elevate humanity, as per his upbringing on Colchis. So, with Lorgar not openly expressing his faith (e.g. penning the Lectitio Divinitatus) and the Word Bearers moving so slowly because they spent time errecting shrines and whatnot, the Emperor chewed him out. Frustrated, Lorgar turned to Chaos.