Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Saltarius]

I follow Trilby as quickly as possible.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I walk as slowly as possible, stopping at pretty much every shop window on the way.

 

[Saltarius]

"Pretty sure I heard T-Rex. Better hurry."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I slow down.

 

[Saltarius]

"Dinosaurrrrrr!"

 

[Paddy the Second]

The Paddybot emits dinosaur noises. "This thing is great."

 

[Saltarius]

"...Not sexually attracted to dinosaurs. Nice try."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I wasn't trying that (for once) I was just testing the sound capacities."

 

[Saltarius]

"Still...never try robot sex before..."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I don't think this thing even has a wing wang or a hoo ha, I guess you could attach a dildo or a fleshlight as you prefer."

 

[Saltarius]

"...Ew, plastic."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Sorry my new body isn't good enough for you."

 

[Saltarius]

"It okay. Old one wasn't good enough either!" I cackle.

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Shows how desperate you were."

 

[Saltarius]

"At least you help me understand. Whole time was lesbian! Who knew?"

 

[Paddy the Second]

Paddybot slaps Salt in the face with a huge dildo.

 

[Saltarius]

"What."

 

[Paddy the Second]

The Paddybot beats Salt to death with a three foot purple dildo.

 

[Saltarius]

I respawn on Paddybot's shoulders.

"Why mad?"

 

[Paddy the Second]

"It's a metaphor for the insecurity I feel about my new body."