Maths and Science Jokes!

[Godavari]

Atom1: "I'm hit! I'm hit! I've lost an electron!"
Atom2: "Are you sure?"
Atom1: "I'm positive!"

Hardy-har-har.

 

[Kazyan]

God must be terrible at integrating. He hasn't added a sea in eons.

 

[ohellynot]

Is it just me, or do all these physicist, engineer, and mathmatician jokes all sound exactly the same?

That's because they all believe in constants.

And you sir, are a genius.

Please, you give me too little credit.

And the last one was stolen from futurama, after all that intelligence and wit.
(zapp branagan in the martion episode)
check and mate

Maybe if you weren't so late with that >.>

sorry, I can´t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am

...can't hear you over how late you are...

I've been on holiday and not had consistent internet accses so nyaa

For almost a year?

I'm very rich you see

And I'm ECCENTRIC! *rrrrraaarrrrrr rrrrrrraaaaaarrrrrrr rrrrrrraaaaaaarrrrrr*

I see, hmm I wonder how long we can keep this thread alive for.

 

[Nicragomi]

You see, 10=2 in binary.

ahhhh.....



i still dont get it......

nah i kidd

edit: now i know more! and knowing is half the battle!

 

[crimson5pheonix]

Is it just me, or do all these physicist, engineer, and mathmatician jokes all sound exactly the same?

That's because they all believe in constants.

And you sir, are a genius.

Please, you give me too little credit.

And the last one was stolen from futurama, after all that intelligence and wit.
(zapp branagan in the martion episode)
check and mate

Maybe if you weren't so late with that >.>

sorry, I can´t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am

...can't hear you over how late you are...

I've been on holiday and not had consistent internet accses so nyaa

For almost a year?

I'm very rich you see

And I'm ECCENTRIC! *rrrrraaarrrrrr rrrrrrraaaaaarrrrrrr rrrrrrraaaaaaarrrrrr*

I see, hmm I wonder how long we can keep this thread alive for.

Depends. I bet there's a statistic for that.

 

[rhyno435]

This is the biggest size I could find in about 10 minutes:

Spoiler: If you claim to be a nerd and don't understand this then leave.

I get that 10 is 2 in binary (hooray for Grade 11 Computer Engineering), but why is the "n't" in "don't" underlined.

 

[ohellynot]

Is it just me, or do all these physicist, engineer, and mathmatician jokes all sound exactly the same?

That's because they all believe in constants.

And you sir, are a genius.

Please, you give me too little credit.

And the last one was stolen from futurama, after all that intelligence and wit.
(zapp branagan in the martion episode)
check and mate

Maybe if you weren't so late with that >.>

sorry, I can´t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am

...can't hear you over how late you are...

I've been on holiday and not had consistent internet accses so nyaa

For almost a year?

I'm very rich you see

And I'm ECCENTRIC! *rrrrraaarrrrrr rrrrrrraaaaaarrrrrrr rrrrrrraaaaaaarrrrrr*

I see, hmm I wonder how long we can keep this thread alive for.

Depends. I bet there's a statistic for that.

and what be that you thinks?

 

[Pingieking]

1) What is sin(x)/n?
2) Why are physicists so bad in bed?
3) Why is it awkward to have a 3-some with a physicist?

Spoiler

1) six (the n cancel out). 2) Because if he can find the right position, he can't get the right momentum, and if he can get the right momentum, he can't find the right position. 3) Because they can't do 3-body problems.

A neutrino walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve neutrinos here", and the neutrino says "Oh, I'm just passing through".

 

[Xanadu84]

This is the biggest size I could find in about 10 minutes:

Spoiler: If you claim to be a nerd and don't understand this then leave.

I get that 10 is 2 in binary (hooray for Grade 11 Computer Engineering), but why is the "n't" in "don't" underlined.

It's not underlined, that's just a subscript, likely saying where the T Shirt the picture came from was made.

The best part of this joke was explaining it to my brother a while ago. I explained to him, what it meant, and he laughed. Then later, I saw that his AIM away message said, "There are ten kinds of people in this world..." Quite the facepalm moment.

 

[MercenaryCanary]

One evening Rene Descartes went to relax at a local tavern. The tender approached and said, "Ah, good evening Monsieur Descartes! Shall I serve you the usual drink?". Descartes replied, "I think not.", and promptly vanished.

I rather like that one