Microsoft Brings Cortana Into the Real World

[Solo-Wing]

I couldn't care less about that because I will never get a Windows Phone. Now if Google were to add somehting to Android... That would hold my interest. Well first I want them to fix Google Now. No matter how hard I try it will never play music that I have saved in the phone when I tell it to with voice commands. When I say a specific song it shows me a munch of Youtube videos for that song. NO. I got it saved on you! PLAY IT!

 

[Solo-Wing]

Our shell will natively support all of our essential services, and will be great at responding seamlessly to what people ask for, and even anticipating what they need before they ask for it.

So you're basically copying [a href="http://www.google.com/landing/now/"]Google Now[/a]. Yep, same old Microsoft.

-snip-

Based on how MS have said that Cortana will have anticipatory functionality as well as reactive responses, this is more of a copy of Google Now than it is Siri. Google Now is actually useful, Siri is a gimmick.

I can't even get it to play the music on my phone. If Cortana can do that it will be leagues better then Google Now in my eyes.

 

[karloss01]

Pff, want a GLaDOS Siri! She'd line all her answers with insults and threats.

Yes.
Also...
HAL2000
Marvin (the Paranoid Android from HHGTTG)
Class M-3 Model B9, General Utility Non-Theorizing Environmental Control Robot (from Lost in Space)!!!

I'm surprised Microsoft hadn't already marketed an actual AR product of Cortana.

You forgot CL4P-TP (or Claptrap if you're his friend) but that one would be incredibly annoying.

maybe they want to fix their basic phone settings before adding more junk. can't even delete a phone number without deleting a person's whole profile from your account.

 

[Shamanic Rhythm]

I'm confident it will be really well executed by this company... rite?

I would laugh so hard if Paperclip showed up in the messaging function. Especially with some more... 21st century suggestions.

"Hey! It looks like you're trying to drunk text!"

 

[IndieGinge]

I hope that they actually get Jen Taylor to help with this, because one of these apps that actually sounds like a real human being would be fucking awesome. I know everyone's all chiming in that they wan GlAdOS, but when I heard this, I was kinda thinking it would be cool if there were more varied and human voices for the, um, "phone-assistant" apps?

 

[Callate]

It's actually a plot by Microsoft to make sure you keep buying new phones. If you keep the same phone for seven years, Cortana starts sending vulgar texts to your exes, playing music at maximum volume at random moments, and making calls to China.

 

[duchaked]

I would totally want Cortana's guiding voice loll

or GLaDOS's condescending one

 

[neonsword13-ops]

Pff, want a GLaDOS Siri! She'd line all her answers with insults and threats.

You're welcome.

OT: I'm sorry, but Cortana just doesn't work. She is the face of Halo, along with The Chief, not Microsoft.

If they want to make a voice assistance software, they really need their own charact-

I'm confident it will be really well executed by this company... rite?

PRINT THAT SHIT RITE HERE.

Confirmed: Paperclip will lead the next generation of innovative, A.I. navigation.

 

[KingWein22]

I'm confident it will be really well executed by this company... rite?

I see you want to make an A.I. named Cortana.

You could use some better language for her. Perhaps these words can help?

OT: I really do not see how this works. She is the face of Halo. Outside of it, I just don't see it.

 

[Dethenger]

Looking at the article title I thought it meant they were going to bring her to stage for some Xbox presentation Hatsune Miku style.

Yeah, I thought it was going to be like that hologram Tupac thing that happened. And then I imagined a Halo broadway musical with hologram Cortana and some beefcake Master Chief singing about the Flood. And now I'm disappointed because I don't even have a smartphone so I can't have this Cortana thing.

 

[Ninonybox_v1legacy]

I approve Microsoft....I approve a lot.

 

[WarpZone]

Microsoft? Lasting hipness? Nope.

They'll find a way to ruin it. They always do. Oh, sure, it sounds like a good idea now when it's just a fun little app some programmer threw together for kicks. But as soon as the suits get it under internal management, they'll fuck it up just like they did with... well, Cortana, really.

(Seriously, why would a computer suddenly need to be barefoot!?)

 

[Pinkamena]

Pff, want a GLaDOS Siri! She'd line all her answers with insults and threats.

GlaDOS, tell me a joke.
"Your life. HA HA."

GlaDOS, give me directions to X.
"I've heard the bottom of the Atlantic is beautiful this time of year. I suggest you drive your car into it. Or you could go left in 300 meters. Either way your life will eventually end."

 

[ThunderCavalier]

Unless this app generates a miniature hologram whenever you activate it, I doubt this will have people adopting Windows Phones in droves.

 

[Strazdas]

Is Siri really that popular? i was under the impression its something you try once get bored and never turn on again.
Then again, i recently found out there exist people that use windows media center......

 

[Flames66]

I'd be fine with a Siri clone/same kind of thing, but this part worries me:

"Our UI will be deeply personalized, based on the advanced, almost magical, intelligence in our cloud that learns more and more over time about people and the world. Our shell will natively support all of our essential services, and will be great at responding seamlessly to what people ask for, and even anticipating what they need before they ask for it."

I do not want it learning things about me and storing them on a cloud. Unless all the things it learns are stored locally, can been seen and deleted by me and cannot be accessed by anyone remotely this can stay the hell away from me.

 

[Griffolion]

-snip-

I've just done it consistently three times in a row. I think it might be your phone.

 

[rednightmare]

, "Our UI will be deeply personalized, based on the advanced, almost magical, intelligence in our cloud that learns more and more over time about people and the world. Our shell will natively support all of our essential services, and will be great at responding seamlessly to what people ask for, and even anticipating what they need before they ask for it."

Wait?! Have we just given up on stopping the Machines uprising and decided to just make Skynet already? Because this seems kind of creepy.

 

[Matthi205]

Is Siri really that popular? i was under the impression its something you try once get bored and never turn on again.
Then again, i recently found out there exist people that use windows media center......

Siri, not really. The religious Apple people sometimes use it, but I don't know of anyone else using the feature after finding out it's there (it can't do most stuff, and it's hilariously inaccurate most of the time).

Windows Media Center? I haven't even touched that piece of shit software. Windows 7's Windows Media Player with the CCCP codecs works well though (even if it's hard to believe). I've even found Internet Explorer to work better than Chrome - surprise, it's more stable with lots of open tabs. It's weird really, as if there were some kind of competent programmers at Microsoft.

 

[WarpZone]

, "Our UI will be deeply personalized, based on the advanced, almost magical, intelligence in our cloud that learns more and more over time about people and the world. Our shell will natively support all of our essential services, and will be great at responding seamlessly to what people ask for, and even anticipating what they need before they ask for it."

Wait?! Have we just given up on stopping the Machines uprising and decided to just make Skynet already? Because this seems kind of creepy.

That's a good point, actually. It's like even AFTER pulling the Xbox 180, they can't talk enough about monitoring on their users.

Seriously, Microsoft, get help. They make these things called PR firms. Buy one. Then shut up and get the fuck out of its way.