Most impractical game weapons and attacks.

[LooK iTz Jinjo]

I love that game. The only game that's ever made a Blunderbuss an effective weapon.

idk...Fable 2 had pretty much one shot kills with 'em.

OT: Wakka. Final Fantasy 10. He throws balls.

Lulu, FFX, she let's a moogle doll attack for her, at least wakka's balls have little bumps all over them ... ew ... ew ew ew ... *mind gets a job, buys a house, generally gets out of the gutter* ... much better *economic downturn* Noooooooooooo!

Well if you changed his ball it could even be spiky making it much more effective in realistic terms, hence making the moogle a much less practical weapon.

Any Quicktime Event. Ever. Yeah just stand there while I press this button to jump on you're head, hey cheers.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

In tales of synphonia your mage would not use a satff. Or a wand. He had the ultimate weapon... Ball in a cup. Literally it was a ball attatched to a cup and when he casts a spell the ball flies into the cup. No i am not making this up. No one could make that up. I think he just hits people with the ball by swinging the cup. This is why i never use him.

 

[Quassimodo]

Genis's ball-in-a-cup thing (I think it's called a Kendama) from Tales of Symphonia.

The thing looks ridiculous. Your basically hitting the enemy with a child's toy (and the damage it deals represents this). Genis is a mage though, so his weapons pitiful power doesn't really matter. Now you might assume that Genis some how improves his magic by channeling it through the Kendama. Why a Kendama would be useful for this is beyond me. Then you notice that nobody else does this. Most characters that use magic, both enemy and ally, are seen using staffs typical to RPGs. Other times they don't even have a weapon. So this raises the question as to why Genis uses the ridiculous Kendama when almost every other mage opts to use staffs and similar weapons.

My theory is that he has the Kendama to entertain himself while casting incredibly long spells.

OT: Wakka. Final Fantasy 10. He throws balls.

I can't decide which is more absurd; the legendary Kendamas in Tales of Symphonia or the legendary blitzballs in Final Fantasy 10. Both make you wonder about who actually decided to make these things and why they are hidden inside dungeons/carried by enemies.

In tales of synphonia your mage would not use a satff. Or a wand. He had the ultimate weapon... Ball in a cup. Literally it was a ball attatched to a cup and when he casts a spell the ball flies into the cup. No i am not making this up. No one could make that up. I think he just hits people with the ball by swinging the cup. This is why i never use him.

actually genis is one of the best damage dealers there is in tales of symphonia

also in both games (yes there is 2) he explains that he uses that becouse it helps him to concentrate which most ppl agree is quite a necessity for casting spells

 

[rosac]

the plasma cannon when wielded by a space marine on foot.

Basically, a gun taken from a battletank that so big a normal man cannot lift the cocking things, that fires super heated energy at the enemy, unless it explodes and kills the bearer. and when I say this things big, I mean it probably weighs a quarter of a freaking ton without ammo.

rosac

 

[Unia]

One of the older Persona games has a guy who attacks people by throwing change at them. He can still do more damage than a physically weaker character dual wielding guns.

 

[Hawk of Battle]

I'm surprised no one here suggested anything from Armed and Dangerous. Landshark guns anyone? Topsy-Turvy Bomb??

What about the stuff from Painkiller, like that gun that shoots shurikens and lightning? Or he one that shoots whole trees at people?

Actually scratch that, all of those are completely awesome, no matter how impractical. In fact I think the more impractical the weapon, the more awesome the weapon, so it doesn't really matter how impractical it is, as long as it looks the shit.

Now if we were talking about "innefective" weapons instead of impractical, then I'd have to go with the stick from Ico. It's literally a plank of wood, which you use to fight shadow monsters. Yeahhh....

 

[TimeLord]

Dante's guns in DMC4, like shooting peas from straws

 

[Silent Eagle]

Nothing beats the Cerebral Bore!

Absolutly one of the most entertaining weapons ever constructed! Such fond memories.
I wonder if i can find one on ebay...

 

[bassie302]

as far as impractical goes... the banana bomb from Worms springs to mind. Those things are engineered to launch their cluster of deadly vitamins directly towards your and ónly your worms.

and for sheer rubbishness... the .32 pistol from Fallout 3. I picked one up just outside the vault, tried to kill a raider with it, switched back to my trusty 10mm and never touched them things again. This weapon has absolutely no good perks at all... it's not powerful, not accurate, has a tiny clip size and takes an age and a half to reload.

 

[Cid Silverwing]

All the guns in SWAT 4. They are just unrealistically inaccurate even when fired from a stationary crouch in controlled bursts.

 

[Geo Da Sponge]

The Vulcan gun mounted on the Blackhawk helicopter in the Bad Company 2 multiplayer. The combination of the constantly moving helicopter, the epic muzzle flash and the fact that you have to hit someone quite a few times to bring them down makes the gun feel less like a massive machine of spitting death and more like a mild nuisance for the enemy.

To be fair this is probably for the best as on many Rush maps the attackers get a healthy supply of these helicopters, but it's just nowhere near as terrifyingly powerful as you would expect.

 

[Rewold]

The twin blades of azzinoth. I don't think anyone can really use them unless you are a huge giant. Although they are given to gnomes....

 

[Petromir]

the jackhammer on unreal tournament. you can't get close enough to melee. i have killed 2 people with, both bots, both on easy. what's the point

the alt fire for it disables vehicles

Im gonna say most swords from rpg games, so many of them would be just horrible weapons, either too big to cut right or designed in such a way as to be too light for the type of sword they are or made in such a way as to break very easily

Certaily most JRPG's have that problem. Western RPG's tend to suffer less from this (certainly intentionally, the msitakes seem to be more graphics errors, rather than intentionally making them, like alot of modern JRPG's seem to)

western ones have it also, wow is particularly bad about it and thats the one that comes to mind the most for it for me

I didnt say western games were immune but Japanease/eastern games seem to suffer from it much more.

My feeling with melee weapons is that you should base them on real weapons, and in the case of magic versions you should be using the magic part to improve an already functionsal/good weapon into a great weapon not overcoming the limertations of a prepubesant design fantasy.

 

[Jfswift]

Haha I don't know, that lancer was pretty epic. I got pretty good at sawing dudes in half (although it was significantly easier to interupt in GoW2).

Personally I think pretty much every gun ever in the Turoc series was impractical (not saying they weren't powerful or couldn't be used.. just impractical). Except for that blatent Predator ripoff of a boomerang razor in 3. OMG was that thing epic. XD

 

[EBass]

Knights of the Round in FF7.

Sure you'd kill the bad guy but by the time the animation finished you've already grown up got married, had kids, got divorced, sold your house, got bored of your job, bought a motorbike, sold the motorbike, spoken with some guy in the pub about how you used to be a biker and drawn out your pension.

Also, any gun in MGS aside from the tranq pistol.

 

[Kevlar Eater]

Tira's hula-hoop blade (Soul Calibur 3). How the hell can that thing be used without risk of losing a few fingers?