Mother Finds Kidnapped Children On Facebook
- Thread starter Tom Goldman
- Start date
I doubt anyone is really going to read this, since it's page 7 or 8 at this point, but "kidnapping" in a legal sense is not the horrible thing that so many respondents are condemning the father for. From a legal standpoint, if one parent denies the other's custody rights by keeping the children from them and moves away, it is considered kidnapping. This is regardless of the reason for Dad removing the kids from Mom's vicinity.
My wife was technically kidnapped by her mother when she was 11 until she was 18 but her father refused to press charges against her mother because it would've caused far more problems than it solved. My wife and I both agree that her dad should have come and taken her and her brother away from their mom because she was the lousy parent.
In the case in this article, we have no idea why Dad removed the kids from Mom and ran off to Florida. Was Mom involved in drugs, gangs, prostitution, etc.? Was Dad? We don't really know enough details to condemn either party, though in another article about this it mentioned that the daughter told the mom that they were happy with their father in Florida and told Mom to leave her alone. To me, that is very telling. Also, the Daughter in this case is probably 18 or so at this point, which means that she's a legal adult and doesn't have to go anywhere with her Mom if she doesn't want to. There are a few rare exceptions to this rule, but this case doesn't seem to be one.
My wife was technically kidnapped by her mother when she was 11 until she was 18 but her father refused to press charges against her mother because it would've caused far more problems than it solved. My wife and I both agree that her dad should have come and taken her and her brother away from their mom because she was the lousy parent.
In the case in this article, we have no idea why Dad removed the kids from Mom and ran off to Florida. Was Mom involved in drugs, gangs, prostitution, etc.? Was Dad? We don't really know enough details to condemn either party, though in another article about this it mentioned that the daughter told the mom that they were happy with their father in Florida and told Mom to leave her alone. To me, that is very telling. Also, the Daughter in this case is probably 18 or so at this point, which means that she's a legal adult and doesn't have to go anywhere with her Mom if she doesn't want to. There are a few rare exceptions to this rule, but this case doesn't seem to be one.
Now, here's how I see it:
Father kidnaps kids after relationship with wife goes sour. As the kids are living in Florida and have access to computers, the father is presumably not a raving drug-addicted psycopath. Mother searches for years, and eventually finds kids on facebook. Justice intervenes, the day is saved, kids returned to mother, everyone is happy except father, who is now in court.
Now, my guesses on the motivations of various parties. There isn't enough information about either parents, but for now I'll assume they're both average, middle class American citizens.
Father: He definitly gets the worst of it. Women are always viewed with sympathy by the courts and the media (except in politics, but that is a different debate) and even if the wife was the spawn of satan the father knew that any jury would rule in her favor with their old 'kids need the mother' line. Father figures at this age kids won't remember mother, so he flees to Florida. He settles down, and evidently is not caught. Kids experience relatively normal childhood and evidently don't remember mother.
MANY YEARS LATER
Father is abruptly notified that mother has found children on facebook when police storm his house / apartment and arrest him. He is now in a massive legal battle with a woman he left 15 years ago over children he raised and bonded with in a court system with massive prejudice against men in any issue regarding children.
Mother: In my mind she's a bit of a *****. While she likely did suffer from the theft of her children, she evidently wasn't heartbroken enough to do some simple steps such as hiring a private investigator or the like to try and track down her husband, instead relying on local police who evidently failed.
MANY YEARS LATER
Mother abruptly discovers children on facebook. Rather than trying and contacting them discretely before taking action, she immmediatly figures the best way to go about this is to call in the law and end up with two children who she knows nothing about, has had no contact with for 15 years, who are uprooted from a place that they've lived for most of their lives, and are now filled with the knowledge that both their dad is a kidnapper and their mom is completely off her bird.
Kids: While they're not being screwed by the system, they are seriously being screwed by their mother. As they are reasonably old, their likely response is to be along the lines of "what the hell is this?". I, for one (speaking as a 16 year old) would be extremely creeped out if some lady from California, who I have never met, arrested my dad who I've known my whole life, destroyed any hope of ever having a normal life, and now is demanding that I uproot myself from the only home I've ever remembered to come live in California. While the daughter can escape this, the son is in for some serious trauma in this matter.
To be honest, the real victim isn't the mom, it's the kids. The mother acted irrationally, and no matter how much she claims to "love her children", in the end she just falsified that because of everything she's going to put them through now.
Father kidnaps kids after relationship with wife goes sour. As the kids are living in Florida and have access to computers, the father is presumably not a raving drug-addicted psycopath. Mother searches for years, and eventually finds kids on facebook. Justice intervenes, the day is saved, kids returned to mother, everyone is happy except father, who is now in court.
Now, my guesses on the motivations of various parties. There isn't enough information about either parents, but for now I'll assume they're both average, middle class American citizens.
Father: He definitly gets the worst of it. Women are always viewed with sympathy by the courts and the media (except in politics, but that is a different debate) and even if the wife was the spawn of satan the father knew that any jury would rule in her favor with their old 'kids need the mother' line. Father figures at this age kids won't remember mother, so he flees to Florida. He settles down, and evidently is not caught. Kids experience relatively normal childhood and evidently don't remember mother.
MANY YEARS LATER
Father is abruptly notified that mother has found children on facebook when police storm his house / apartment and arrest him. He is now in a massive legal battle with a woman he left 15 years ago over children he raised and bonded with in a court system with massive prejudice against men in any issue regarding children.
Mother: In my mind she's a bit of a *****. While she likely did suffer from the theft of her children, she evidently wasn't heartbroken enough to do some simple steps such as hiring a private investigator or the like to try and track down her husband, instead relying on local police who evidently failed.
MANY YEARS LATER
Mother abruptly discovers children on facebook. Rather than trying and contacting them discretely before taking action, she immmediatly figures the best way to go about this is to call in the law and end up with two children who she knows nothing about, has had no contact with for 15 years, who are uprooted from a place that they've lived for most of their lives, and are now filled with the knowledge that both their dad is a kidnapper and their mom is completely off her bird.
Kids: While they're not being screwed by the system, they are seriously being screwed by their mother. As they are reasonably old, their likely response is to be along the lines of "what the hell is this?". I, for one (speaking as a 16 year old) would be extremely creeped out if some lady from California, who I have never met, arrested my dad who I've known my whole life, destroyed any hope of ever having a normal life, and now is demanding that I uproot myself from the only home I've ever remembered to come live in California. While the daughter can escape this, the son is in for some serious trauma in this matter.
To be honest, the real victim isn't the mom, it's the kids. The mother acted irrationally, and no matter how much she claims to "love her children", in the end she just falsified that because of everything she's going to put them through now.
The 'right thing' in this case sure is in that strange gray zone no one's quite sure if it's good or bad.
Not knowing a thing about both the mother and the father doesn't help either...
Not knowing a thing about both the mother and the father doesn't help either...
Well, at least now they don't have to be called Uthera.Matt_LRR said:
Seriously, I don't know what the mothers name is but I cant imagine the kids not being better off with her.
So, because the dad has a funny sounding last name he's a bad parent and the mother is not? The article leaves her unnamed, so who's to say that her last name isn't something like "Vaginahurtz" or something like that?Mullahgrrl said:
Well, we pretty much just have his name and the kidnapping stuff to go on.Nigh Invulnerable said:
There is now way they would leave out her name if it was Vaginahurtz.
Meeeeeeeh, Facebook didn't do anything, it's just that the mother was "SO bright" to look for them there.
Tip: is was obvious too look for them on "social" sites.
Anyways, yeah, I agree with the guys that point out the obvious, like yes, maybe they were saved, but also, maybe there's living a shittier life now. I know I'd like to live in Florida, with all the hot chicks around. Besides, I'm guessing that if she didn't give up for 15 years, she's a pretty grudgy *****, so my guess is the kids were better off with their dad.
Screw the legal system, it's all bullshit
Tip: is was obvious too look for them on "social" sites.
Anyways, yeah, I agree with the guys that point out the obvious, like yes, maybe they were saved, but also, maybe there's living a shittier life now. I know I'd like to live in Florida, with all the hot chicks around. Besides, I'm guessing that if she didn't give up for 15 years, she's a pretty grudgy *****, so my guess is the kids were better off with their dad.
Screw the legal system, it's all bullshit
No, I'm right behind you.cainx10a said:
OT: Well, nothing is stated about the woman, so I can't make any assupmtions, but her daughter is a legal adult if the ages match up, so she could very well go back to Florida if she wanted to. Pity the son though, he's stuck with this woman who basically uprooted his whole life for "the sake of justice."
Facebook re-united me with an uber old friend of mine, whos parents took when they ran away from debt.
oh yeah!
oh yeah!
So they just cut off the emotional bond the children may have built with the father?
Then again if he kidnapped them he was probably wasn't a very good person to begin with...
Then again if he kidnapped them he was probably wasn't a very good person to begin with...