Movie Defense Force: Silent Hill Revelation 3D - A Sidesplitting Family Comedy

Jimothy Sterling

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Silent Hill Revelation 3D - A Sidesplitting Family Comedy

One of the best cinema experiences I've ever had, man!

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JoJo

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Cool new avatar Jim. I saw the original Silent Hill movie but never really gave this one much thought, maybe I'll give it a look if it ever turns up on Netflix.
 

Darth_Payn

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Jim, I love it when you do these "alternate takes" on bad movies. It's just like that time you called "Showgirls (Oh, Christ!)" a sequel to "Saved By The Bell". I have to find another "serious" movie you redid as a comedy.
 

Bocaj2000

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Silent Hill the comedy..... *shivers*
Damn it Jim! Why must you make me discover with this abomination of an idea. Now I have to rewatch this piece of shit and try to like it :'(
 

LysanderNemoinis

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Uh...I may be the only person to hold this view, but I thought it was way better than the first movie. Sure, Revelation isn't that good, but it's a hell of a lot better than that poorly acted anti-Christian wankfest masquerading as Silent Hill. And no matter what, it's still better than the Resident Evil movies. At least these people were making a genuine effort, and the plot and characters far closer to SH3 than any of Anderson's piddle.
 

Fiz_The_Toaster

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Alright, I will admit that I completely ignored the hell out of this film because my understanding was that it suuuuuuuuucks. I've always said I will only watch it if liquor is involved, but that was the bitter Silent Hill fan talking. I'm getting better.

That said, I will give this a shot and watch it as a comedy that it clearly appears to be because you sold me on the whole 'Pyramid Head as a Pokemon' deal.

Liquor will still be involved though because reasons.
 

Goliath100

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I'm with Jimmy. If I want a funny Pokemon movie I watch Silent Hill: Revelation 3D. If I want to watch a good Silent Hill movie, I watch Pokemon: The Spell og Unown.
 

Rad Party God

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I geniunely liked the first Silent Hill film and I still genuinely think it's a great film.

I've always ignored the new one because, well, "spider-doll", among other things that sound sillier if I start to write them. I'll give it a watch whenever it comes up on Netflix, but it definitely isn't on my priorities list.
 

DirgeNovak

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This video kind of contradicts this show's theme tune, but I wholeheartedly agree. It's a really horrible, despicable movie, but it's so much fun to watch.

But if they actually do what the ending threatens to do, which is basically
to make Silent Hill 2 but with Sean Bean instead of James and Radha Mitchell instead of Mary,
I will murder a kitten.
Mumorpuger said:
Was that John Snow??
Yes, he plays Vincent (who is turned into a teenager for some fucking stupid reason). He's horrible in this. It's amazing to see such great talent (Sean Bean, Kit Harrington, Malcolm Fucking McDowell) suddenly become the worst actors ever because the director was utterly incompetent.
LysanderNemoinis said:
At least these people were making a genuine effort, and the plot and characters far closer to SH3 than any of Anderson's piddle.
Is it though? At least Anderson doesn't pretend his movies have anything to do with the games (aside from the title). This shit was presented as an adaptation of Silent Hill 3. And then they pull this shit:
Vincent, who was a high-ranking priest of the cult in the game, is now Claudia's teenage son.
Douglas, Heather's closest ally in the game, is relegated to a bit part with three minutes of screen time.
Claudia turns into a cenobite and fights Pyramid Head (who, like Jim says, basically becomes a pokemon) out of fucking nowhere to have a climactic ending.
Chris/Harry somehow survives the movie to make a sequel hook, whereas Harry's death in the game was so important to the plot.
Frankly, I'd rather have a movie that really has nothing to do with the games than a movie based on a three-line synopsis of the actual game that fucks up every major plot point and character.
 

Blade_125

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I guess that is one way to look the movie, but for me (and I imagine many others) we wanted to see a silent hill movie and thinking f it as a comedy just heightens the disappointment.

The first had of the movie wasn't bad, not as good as the firs one, but still ok. Enough suspense to keep me interested. Once they get to silent hill though the movie jumps the rails and is so crushingly disappointing.

I can appreciate what you are trying to do Mr Stirling, but it doesn't soften the blow.
 

Boogie Knight

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I have to politely disagree with the Pokemon assertion. In truth, the finale is from a Godzilla movie: We follow the not very good story of some cheesy actors and everything gets put on hold as the monster we really wanted to see stomps in and clobbers another monster which the kids were eagerly waiting for the whole movie.

Did anyone else hum the Persona 4 theme as Heather made peace with her dark side?
 

Best of the 3

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Probably because I've never played any Silent Hill, I had the same oppinion as this video. The acting was hammy, and Pyramid head was laughable, especially when he was on his merry-go-round bicycle contraption? He just looked so damn happy.
 

Fiz_The_Toaster

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DirgeNovak said:
This video kind of contradicts this show's theme tune, but I wholeheartedly agree. It's a really horrible, despicable movie, but it's so much fun to watch.

But if they actually do what the ending threatens to do, which is basically
to make Silent Hill 2 but with Sean Bean instead of James and Radha Mitchell instead of Mary,
I will murder a kitten.
Wait...what?

They're actually thinking about doing that with a straight face?

Do they even want their movie to make sense?

I just... I can't...

I can't even even!
 

DirgeNovak

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Fiz_The_Toaster said:
DirgeNovak said:
This video kind of contradicts this show's theme tune, but I wholeheartedly agree. It's a really horrible, despicable movie, but it's so much fun to watch.

But if they actually do what the ending threatens to do, which is basically
to make Silent Hill 2 but with Sean Bean instead of James and Radha Mitchell instead of Mary,
I will murder a kitten.
Wait...what?

They're actually thinking about doing that with a straight face?

Do they even want their movie to make sense?

I just... I can't...

I can't even even!
I don't know if the sequel is actually being planned, but in the end,
Heather, Vincent and Harry (because Vincent survives as well, because screw respecting the source material) are about to leave Silent Hill, but Harry decides to stay and look for Rose, who is still missing in the town. Then Heather and Vincent hitch a ride with Travis Grady and come across a crashed prison bus because wink wink.
It's fucking stupid.
 

Fiz_The_Toaster

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DirgeNovak said:
Fiz_The_Toaster said:
DirgeNovak said:
This video kind of contradicts this show's theme tune, but I wholeheartedly agree. It's a really horrible, despicable movie, but it's so much fun to watch.

But if they actually do what the ending threatens to do, which is basically
to make Silent Hill 2 but with Sean Bean instead of James and Radha Mitchell instead of Mary,
I will murder a kitten.
Wait...what?

They're actually thinking about doing that with a straight face?

Do they even want their movie to make sense?

I just... I can't...

I can't even even!
I don't know if the sequel is actually being planned, but in the end,
Heather, Vincent and Harry (because Vincent survives as well, because screw respecting the source material) are about to leave Silent Hill, but Harry decides to stay and look for Rose, who is still missing in the town. Then Heather and Vincent hitch a ride with Travis Grady and come across a crashed prison bus because wink wink.
It's fucking stupid.
...

*sighs*

Well, they made all their money back and then some, so who knows what will happen.

And people wonder why I'm a jaded "fan" of the series.
 

LysanderNemoinis

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Nov 8, 2010
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DirgeNovak said:
This video kind of contradicts this show's theme tune, but I wholeheartedly agree. It's a really horrible, despicable movie, but it's so much fun to watch.

But if they actually do what the ending threatens to do, which is basically
to make Silent Hill 2 but with Sean Bean instead of James and Radha Mitchell instead of Mary,
I will murder a kitten.
Mumorpuger said:
Was that John Snow??
Yes, he plays Vincent (who is turned into a teenager for some fucking stupid reason). He's horrible in this. It's amazing to see such great talent (Sean Bean, Kit Harrington, Malcolm Fucking McDowell) suddenly become the worst actors ever because the director was utterly incompetent.
LysanderNemoinis said:
At least these people were making a genuine effort, and the plot and characters far closer to SH3 than any of Anderson's piddle.
Is it though? At least Anderson doesn't pretend his movies have anything to do with the games (aside from the title). This shit was presented as an adaptation of Silent Hill 3. And then they pull this shit:
Vincent, who was a high-ranking priest of the cult in the game, is now Claudia's teenage son.
Douglas, Heather's closest ally in the game, is relegated to a bit part with three minutes of screen time.
Claudia turns into a cenobite and fights Pyramid Head (who, like Jim says, basically becomes a pokemon) out of fucking nowhere to have a climactic ending.
Chris/Harry somehow survives the movie to make a sequel hook, whereas Harry's death in the game was so important to the plot.
Frankly, I'd rather have a movie that really has nothing to do with the games than a movie based on a three-line synopsis of the actual game that fucks up every major plot point and character.
I suppose. Though at least the characters appeared. Douglas was still a good guy, Heather at least sort of looked like she was supposed to look, Claudia was still crazy and evil with a locked up creepy father, and Vincent helped out Heather. The so-called RE movies actually had villains become heroes and vice verca in a couple situations, and it's Anderson's continued bullshitting of the fans that really drives me up the proverbial wall.
While it's still no where near the quality of Prince of Persia and Mortal Kombat in terms of adaptations, it's a damn sight closer than the likes of Resident Evil and Super Mario Bros.
 

DirgeNovak

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LysanderNemoinis said:
*snip*
While it's still no where near the quality of Prince of Persia and Mortal Kombat in terms of adaptations, it's a damn sight closer than the likes of Resident Evil and Super Mario Bros.
"Prince of Persia" and "quality adaptation" in the same sentence? Don't make me laugh. That movie legitimately made me angry. How those assholes took one of the best stories in video game history and made it that fucking pile of shit is sickening.
I wasn't the biggest fan of Silent Hill 3's story (it's good, but it's definitely the weakest of the Team Silent stories), so fucking it up didn't bother me that much, but what they did with Sands of Time was like spitting in my face. They needed five characters, they made a dozen. The prince's origin story makes no fucking sense. The characters have no arcs. And worst of all, they completely, irredeemably fucked up the game's perfect ending.
I guess it looked pretty, though. :p