My First Kiss... And It's With Another Guy.

Johnny Reb

New member
Sep 12, 2010
314
0
0
So I think it's only appropriate that i set the scene and tell you guys how this whole thing went down.

I was at a party this previous Friday that was being held by some of my friends in JROTC. There were quite some people there but it never got too crazy. And yes in case you were wondering there was alcohol and marijuana being used there, and I'd be a liar if i said i didn't join in on the fun. so i got there at around 8pm-ish and i couldn't have been there for more than 6 minuets when my friend Michael invite me over to introduce me to a friend of his. His name was Connor and i could tell you right off the bat that i thought this guy was incredibly attractive, but i would never in a million years say anything along those lines. I mean i've never really considered myself anything but strait my entire life. even if i would have feeling like this i would just try to push them away and say it's just a phase that I'll grow out of.

But anyway, i was introduced, we made small talk, than this girl walks in whom i have known since my freshman year and i can tell you i wanted nothing to do with her, and i could tell that Connor could tell this just by the look on my face as she walked in. But the rest of the night me and him just sat on one of the couches in my friends fairly large house and talked, smoked, talked, drank, and talked. Funny enough i didn't really spend i lot of time with any of my fellow cadets, just really him. mainly because we have a lot in common and he's pretty funny. And i think he could tell i was kind of getting into him (no pun intended).

So as the night started to come to a close most of the people left just leaving me, Connor, and a handful of other people who couldn't get rides home, and thank god none of us thought it would be a good idea to drive. but we had all brought sleeping bags in advance for this reason and he all kind of just settled in and passed out.

Than at around 2am i feel a hand on my shoulder waking me up. Its connor. he asks me if im awake and i say in a sarcastic voice, "i am now". so then he asks me "yea, you wanna go out back and talk a little" i say sure and he both go out the sliding glass door to the back patio where there is a kinda padded bench. so we sit down we start talking again and he asks me what i want to do when i get out of school, i say im enlisting in the Marines, with which he responds "that's hot" in a flirty kinda voice. i chuckle and laugh. Then he puts his hand on my knee and without missing a beat he looks me strait in the eyes and says, "im really starting to like you Kevin" i respond in kind, having no idea in which direction he would take it from there. it couldn't have been 2 seconds after i said i liked him too that he leans over planting his lips right on mine. and here we are, making out on the back porch his my friends house at like 2:30am. and the funny thing is, i didn't resist, not one bit. it felt like a eternity just sitting there with him, my lips battling his.

he's the first to break away. he stands up and suggests he go back inside before the others start waking up to vomit because their too hungover or to come out for a cigarette. i nod, we head back in, he both get back into our respective sleeping bags, but it takes me a good hour before i can fall back asleep after what just happened.

I wake up the next morning to my friend kicking me in the leg telling me to get up because were sharing a ride and its parked outside. so i get out of my bag to check whose still here, Connor had apparently left about an hour ago. so i get my stuff together and then i put my hand in my pocket to get my cell phone out to check for messages and i feel a paper in my pocket that wasn't there before. i pull it out and this a folded put scrap of paper with a phone number on it then bellow the number is "C." which i can most definitely assume it's Conner's. so he slipped his phone number in my pocket while i was asleep last night. when i first saw it my heart kinda had this feeling like it was going to come bouncing out of my chest. and then it sets in. i just had my first kiss, and its with another guy. i guy who i have just met the previous night.

So there it is guys. that the whole story. sorry its so long but I've had a lot on my mind for the past day and im not sure what i should do or how i should handle this. I'm here just looking for some advise and any you guys can give me would be great. I'm much appreciative of anything that's useful. So once again, Thanks.
 

SckizoBoy

Ineptly Chaotic
Legacy
Jan 6, 2011
8,681
200
68
A Hermit's Cave
Huh... well, at the very least, you're bi.

Anyway, I'm not sure what you're after, since you haven't asked any questions. All I can say is that if getting all that down made you feel any better, you've already answered yourself...
 

IndomitableSam

New member
Sep 6, 2011
1,290
0
0
Have fun, enjoy yourself, and don't worry about it. If you're embarrassed, take some time and think about it. By yourself. Think out the next few years of your life and see if he (or another guy, even) fits in and what makes you comfortable.

Guy or girl, straight, bi, or gay, you found someone you really like. Don't let them go because of stigmas or confused feelings. He could be a partner to you, or you could just be friends. Just don't ignore the connection.

Seriously, though, go through reactions of what family/friends/especially the marines would have if you decide you need to come out. If you need to or even want to.

Good luck - sounds like you had an amazing night. Try to have at least a few more like it.
 

Gigano

Whose Eyes Are Those Eyes?
Oct 15, 2009
2,281
0
0
Well, it ain't going to mean more than you want to put into it.

If you want to pursue a relationship with this guy, go for it. He seems interested enough. If you don't, just be fond you had a nice experience, and keep on living to see if more of them - be it with guys or girls - aren't just around the corner.

I don't have any knowledge of the gay scene, but I do know this beyond any reasonable doubt; There's nothing strange or shameful about mutual romantic attraction. Guy or girl, it doesn't really matter all that much in the end. Just go with what feels right.
 
Feb 28, 2008
689
0
0
You lucky sod! But honestly, what you seem to have is really quite lovely, and I can only wish I had found the same. Go for it I say, you seem pretty in love and I don't see the problem in pursuing the relationship you have further.
 

Gralian

Me, I'm Counting
Sep 24, 2008
1,789
0
0
It would help to know what age you were. During teenage years, even late teens, your hormones go wild and to put it bluntly you tend to be less fixated on things like 'straight' or 'gay'. You just want to get jiggy with someone. Anyone. Boys also apparently tend to go through a "gay phase" during puberty. Another explanation i would offer is that since this is your first real intimate experience, it's more about the excitement and novelty of intimacy rather than worrying about the fact it was with another guy. You may pursue something with this guy, only to get serious and then turn around and find out that gay sex isn't really your thing, or you're not attracted to men in general. However, only you can answer those things for yourself. If you already considered yourself bisexual or had previous attractions to men it makes the rest of the points moot. Of course, you could just be gay or bi. In that case, good for you! Don't feel ashamed of the fact and let things run its natural course. Experiment. I'm sure after a while you'll be able to come to a conclusion whether or not you actually like men or whether you were just taken aback by what had happened that night. After all, with alcohol and drugs involved, almost anything can happen - particularly with people you only just met at the party.
 

Johnny Reb

New member
Sep 12, 2010
314
0
0
Gralian said:
It would help to know what age you were. During teenage years, even late teens, your hormones go wild and to put it bluntly you tend to be less fixated on things like 'straight' or 'gay'. You just want to get jiggy with someone. Anyone. Boys also apparently tend to go through a "gay phase" during puberty. Another explanation i would offer is that since this is your first real intimate experience, it's more about the excitement and novelty of intimacy rather than worrying about the fact it was with another guy. You may pursue something with this guy, only to get serious and then turn around and find out that gay sex isn't really your thing, or you're not attracted to men in general. However, only you can answer those things for yourself. If you already considered yourself bisexual or had previous attractions to men it makes the rest of the points moot. Of course, you could just be gay or bi. In that case, good for you! Don't feel ashamed of the fact and let things run its natural course. Experiment. I'm sure after a while you'll be able to come to a conclusion whether or not you actually like men or whether you were just taken aback by what had happened that night. After all, with alcohol and drugs involved, almost anything can happen - particularly with people you only just met at the party.
i am 16. I've been attracted to other men since i was about 13. but i haven't done a single thing about it, and i never thought i would, once again i always just figured it for a phase that would just "go away". But i think your right, maybe i should try to give this a shot. oh and don't worry, i don't feel ashamed at all. i think I'll call him tomorrow after classes.
 

Johnny Reb

New member
Sep 12, 2010
314
0
0
Psychotic-ishSOB said:
You see, that's the kinda shit I want to happen to me, but with a girl. IT'S NEVER ME!!!!

Anyway, you're gay, or at least bi. If you want a dude, you want a dude, just go with it.
heh. right time, right place i suppose. but thank's for the support :)
 

T-Bone24

New member
Dec 29, 2008
2,339
0
0
If you enjoyed yourself, pursue it. If you didn't like what happened then find a way to stop it.

You seemed to enjoy yourself, so just sit down, have a think because it's probably a lot to take in and consider where you want to go with it.
 

Tiger King

Senior Member
Legacy
Oct 23, 2010
837
0
21
Country
USA
Psychotic-ishSOB said:
You see, that's the kinda shit I want to happen to me, but with a girl. IT'S NEVER ME!!!!
theres plenty of girls out there thinking exactly the same thing, sometimes you have to be the one to make the move.

anyway im not gay and dont know much about it really but my misses knew this guy that was really angry and irrate a lot because he tried denying who he was. eventualy he came out and hes better now apparently.
so yeah do what you have to i guess and good luck.
 

Terminal Blue

Elite Member
Legacy
Feb 18, 2010
3,933
1,804
118
Country
United Kingdom
Believe me when I say you are far from the only person in history who has been placed in this position.

The most important thing, at this point, is that you remember that you are still exactly the same person as you were before. Whatever anyone might say, you are not suddenly 'gay' or 'bisexual' unless you choose to commit yourself to being those things, it's something you have the luxury of deciding for yourself in your own time, not something anyone else should be able to tell you. Nothing about you has or must change unless you want it to.

Worrying about whether you're actually gay or bisexual is not worth pursuing right now, you'll reach the point when it's very obvious, but you need a little more experience before it will become really clear. The only question worth asking yourself is how you feel about Connor and how you feel about that kiss, and whether you'd like things to carry on.

There is no 'right' or 'wrong' reason to go for someone. Even if you're just curious, it's worth giving this guy a chance. If you tell him how you feel, I'm sure he will appreciate that you're giving it a chance to work for you rather than simply pushing it aside and saying 'sorry, I'm straight'.

I'm sure this is incredibly far from your mind, but the only thing it's very important to bear in mind is that you need to take extra precautions when you sleep with men. It sounds like it might not be an issue in this case, but it's worth getting into the habit.
 

latenightapplepie

New member
Nov 9, 2008
3,086
0
0
Be glad your first kiss was (relatively) sober, and from someone you liked. That's fairly fortunate for you.

It's quite a lovely first kiss really. I would be very envious, were I not in a relationship with a great guy myself.

But yes, my advice is that you pursue this gentleman and go have some fun. Of course, provided it won't cause any family problems; getting kicked out of house or abused at a young age for being gay or bisexual isn't pleasant.

Also; good thing about the repeal of DADT, huh?
 

Sarcastic_Applause

New member
Dec 1, 2010
159
0
0
as a bi-sexual, i've got to say, that sounds like a pretty damn awesome first kiss there.
You'll have to see what it is you want, and the only way to do that is to get talking!
I'm pretty much in the same Boat with a guy i've been seeing.

Sounds like a similar scenario as i was in now that i think about it. All i can say is good luck and i hope it goes well for you :)
 

JanatUrlich

New member
Apr 24, 2009
1,963
0
0
That was a really nice story! I wish that my first kiss was that good!

Dude, just go with it if you want to. It's not an issue whether it's a boy or a girl.
 

TheLiham

New member
Apr 15, 2010
477
0
0
Better than my first kiss... I still had the taste of pussy in my mouth and it was outside behind a wall.

Yeah you all thought yours were bad!
 

Knight Captain Kerr

New member
May 27, 2011
1,283
0
0
Sounds like you are bi to me. Being attacted to both sexes isn't something that will just go away with time. Not a bad first kiss anyway if you like the guy you should go out with him see where that takes you.