New Dead Island: Riptide Bundle Offers Bloody Boobs

MikeWehner

The Dude
Aug 21, 2011
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New Dead Island: Riptide Bundle Offers Bloody Boobs



Yeah, we imagine it will spark some conversations. Like when a relative sees it in your living room and promptly dismisses your gaming habit as childish. You see, that will give you an opportunity to defend the hobby we all love. You can explain how the statue is really just a modern interpretation of an "iconic Roman marble torso" like Deep Silver suggests. Just make sure you're sipping expensive wine and talking in a fancy accent when you do so. That'll show 'em!

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Thyunda

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May 4, 2009
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The only way I can see that thing fitting on a mantle is if that mantle is already full of assorted zombie ornaments. Otherwise the theme might just be lost on the fact you've got a bikini-clad torso chilling in your living room.
 

Riobux

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Apr 15, 2009
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And it had to be a torso in a bikini. It just had to have only a bikini on. That just simply had to be the case.
 

TilMorrow

Diabolical Party Member
Jul 7, 2010
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Literal What. That torso seems a little too gross to be something that people would want. And the people who do... Well I don't want to think what they might do with it apart from a dislay piece.

Also what's the bloody envelope?

MikeWehner said:
"Dead Island: Riptide is one of the most anticipated releases of the year and is set to build on the original's reputation for OTT action, dark humor and brutal zombie bashing," Nicholls claims.
It is? Strange for him to think that when there hasn't been that much hype for it. In fact I've barely seen the game advertised anywhere apart from one or two articles on the Escapist. Also wasn't the original's reputation meant to be originally be a thought provoking and depressing game? (That was until they actually released the game and the trailers didn't match up with the content.) And Dark humour? Unless they are talking about the terribly evil bugs in the game's system then I haven't found many instances of such things. *Grumble* Zombie ate my samurai blade. *Grumble*
 

MikeWehner

The Dude
Aug 21, 2011
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Thyunda said:
The only way I can see that thing fitting on a mantle is if that mantle is already full of assorted zombie ornaments. Otherwise the theme might just be lost on the fact you've got a bikini-clad torso chilling in your living room.
I actually like it. A few of my buddies who collect horror memorabilia (You know the sort, giant alien statues, fake blood, corpses, love halloween to the point of insanity) have already pre-ordered this and they don't even play games all that much.
 

Roxas1359

Burn, Burn it All!
Aug 8, 2009
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Well this doesn't seem like something people would want to have on display in their homes. I mean they could've come up with any other preorder item, but they went for a bloody torso in a bikini. Guarantee some people will think your some sorta sick murderer if they see that in your house.
Welp, looks like I gotta change where I hide the bodies now. >.>
 

XMark

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Jan 25, 2010
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Heh, people already think I'm weird enough without having one of those things.
 

an annoyed writer

Exalted Lady of The Meep :3
Jun 21, 2012
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I think I just threw up a bit... Ugh. I really gotta ask, why? Who in their sane mind would want this? Who would say "Why yes I'd love a decapitated, limbless torso clad in nothing but a bikini on my shelf"? I don't mind zombies much but this is just disgusting. Forget conversation: I'll be in the bathroom, probably going bulimic.
 

Thyunda

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May 4, 2009
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Capitano Segnaposto said:
Thyunda said:
The only way I can see that thing fitting on a mantle is if that mantle is already full of assorted zombie ornaments. Otherwise the theme might just be lost on the fact you've got a bikini-clad torso chilling in your living room.
I actually like it. A few of my buddies who collect horror memorabilia (You know the sort, giant alien statues, fake blood, corpses, love halloween to the point of insanity) have already pre-ordered this and they don't even play games all that much.
Isn't that the exact situation in which I said this would be acceptable...?
 

MikeWehner

The Dude
Aug 21, 2011
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I didn't know the next Dead Space game was actually set on a tropical island.
XMark said:
Heh, people already think I'm weird enough without having one of those things.
Now if they REALLY wanted to move a product, they'd have replaced the torso with a zombie split head book end: one half at each end.
 

Atary77

New member
Feb 27, 2008
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Dear video game industry,

We're trying to get AWAY from the whole "lonely guys who just want sex in our games" image! Stop it!

To the people who market these ideas, grow up already!
 

Sixcess

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Feb 27, 2010
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Wow. I don't go for collector's editions with all their accompanying clutter, but even if I did I'd be embarrassed to have that... thing... in my house.
 

Ranorak

Tamer of the Coffee mug!
Feb 17, 2010
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"We wanted to provide a unique collector's edition that was utterly Dead Island and would make a striking conversation piece on any discerning zombie gamer's mantel."
Bullshit!
You know it,
I know it.

"It's just cool!" is the only real thought behind this.
You don't want people to hold a striking conversation about it.
You want people to think it's either cool, gross, or both.

Don't insult me by saying it's anything other than that.
 

Metalrocks

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Jan 15, 2009
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WTF?? thats what i was thinking.
dint even like the game, dint even finish it because it was boring and dull. and this addition doesnt even change my mind. more a "stay away from this as well" thought.
 

Dr Jones

Join the Bob Dylan Fangroup!
Jun 23, 2010
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What the fuck happened between that awesome damn trailer for the original Dead Island and now?

Did their old marketing team just collectively commit suicide to be replaced by monkeys?

I just...
 

Something Amyss

Aswyng and Amyss
Dec 3, 2008
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an annoyed writer said:
I think I just threw up a bit... Ugh. I really gotta ask, why? Who in their sane mind would want this? Who would say "Why yes I'd love a decapitated, limbless torso clad in nothing but a bikini on my shelf"? I don't mind zombies much but this is just disgusting. Forget conversation: I'll be in the bathroom, probably going bulimic.
It's okay. Most of the conversation will be along the lines of "what the hell is wrong with you?"
 

Jack and Calumon

Digimon are cool.
Dec 29, 2008
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Can I just say "what the fuck?" here please? Thank you.

What the fuck? What the fucking fuck-fuck? What the fucking fuck-fuck is this fucking fucked up piece of fuck and what fucking fuck-head would fucking think this is a good fucking idea? This is fucked up! Literally as fucking fucked up as anything can fucking be.

It's a SEXUALISED DISEMBODIED BLOODY TORSO. Okay, I know some people are into Guro and you know, this is probably your sort of thing and I don't really care about that. You can be turned on by whatever you like but for a professional gaming company to think "Yes, this is what I want to give to gamers. This is what they want." is stupid. This is disgusting. Really disgusting. Imagine if anyone, ANYONE came over and had no idea what it was and saw it. You would look like a god damn maniac, a freak, a person of an unwell mind. They would leave and you would be the gossip topic of the month because this thing is so horrifyingly grotesque. I'm fine if this is your thing, but honestly, I'm sure if you have any social skills whatsoever you'll think that having it around the house is a bad and dumb idea.
 

Eternal_Lament

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Sep 23, 2010
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Ranorak said:
You don't want people to hold a striking conversation about it.
I don't know, I'd imagine you'd have a pretty decent striking conversation with this. I mean, it's somewhat large, looks like it can cause some damage, it's probably easy to handle. At the very least you have something to hit them with when they hit you with a bat.

OP: At first I was thinking of who the hell would buy that, then I remember the amount of horror memorabilia I've seen bought and realize that the same type of person who collects those things would probably play Dead Island.

Also, I can't be the only one who thought, for a second, that this is what happened to the torso of those *hm-hmm* fake pelvises at sex shops. You know the ones