one sentence to save your life.

[snowman6251]

Come ooooooooon.

 

[EmpressZombiKitty]

"If any of you get any closer, I'm gonna throw my shit at you!"

I would then proceed to drop my pants and start shitting right there in the alley. So they know SHIT JUST GOT REAL.

lol, did you watch Kevin Hart's comedy special, too?

 

[TheLiham]

Hi, I'm selling these fine leather jackets.

 

[The Diabolical Biz]

*Pointing to behind them* FIRE!!!

*As body is filled with enough lead to poison the water supply of a small nation* Hmm...

Maybe this isn't my area of expertise.

 

[Hippobatman]

"You can't kill me! You'll never find Waldo without me!"

 

[Richard Haythornthwaite]

look over there , a distraction !

 

[theheroofaction]

Whatever you do don't turn around.

Then when they turn around; book it.

 

[Ryuu Akamatsu]

"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine!"

 

[Shemming]

"Hey gav" point at one of the guys...and hope to escape in any confusion.

 

[Leemaster777]

"If any of you get any closer, I'm gonna throw my shit at you!"

I would then proceed to drop my pants and start shitting right there in the alley. So they know SHIT JUST GOT REAL.

lol, did you watch Kevin Hart's comedy special, too?

I'm going to assume that's a comedian, but I've never heard of him.

So I'm going to say "no" on that one.

 

[darthotaku]

I swear to god she was the one who came on to me!

assuming the reason they're trying to kill me is over a girl.

 

[WorldCritic]

"LOOK OUT, IT'S BATMAN!"

That should distract them long enough to make my cunning escape.

 

[EmpressZombiKitty]

I would say "Please don't, I'm pregnant!"

or

Go with the insane approach. Just start laughing, banging my head on the wall and biting on my tennis shoe. Followed by calling them ridiculous names (IE:Mr.Pennyworth) and asking if they wanted to join in on my tea party later. They might just walk away.

 

[eggy32]

*Clears throat* *Holds one finger up, as if to say "Stop"*
"KaBlam!"
Then I run away. Works every time.

 

[zpm4737]

If it weren't for that horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!

 

[bdcjacko]

I <3 farts!

That will make them back off.

 

[theheroofaction]

You can't interrogate the dead.

You've then got about 5 seconds to convince them you know something.

 

[MrRetroSpectacles]

If you strike me down I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine, by which I mean my aura will be unbearably bright, not that i will pose a threat.

 

[Your Nightmare]

On an unrelated note, why does everyone keep saying "Book it" and "If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine!" ?

But I would probably say something like

If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine! and when they turn around to discuss what they're going to do with me, I'll book it

 

[Shadie777]

I would say "Red Ranger Transform!" while the power ranger theme tune plays in the background.
That will make them shit bricks.

Anyone.... Want a blowjob?

You have made me lol, you deserve money.