PAX 2010: Hands On Duke Nukem Forever
- Thread starter Susan Arendt
- Start date
Recommended Videos
I'm not sold, esp. since the fight with the Cycloid is pretty much copy/pasta from Duke Nukem 3D right down to the kicking the eyeball through the goal posts.
Not to mention the fact that I haven't been interested in Duke's brand of humour since I was a teenager which was 8-10 years ago.
Not to mention the fact that I haven't been interested in Duke's brand of humour since I was a teenager which was 8-10 years ago.
This game hasn't really been in development for 12 years, it's been on hiatus for 12 years and in development for an afternoon.
Duke Nukem Forever has a specifically bound button on the 360 for drinking beer, if that isn't pure win i don't know what is.
There's gamers out there who are only a few years older than the development on this thing, that's scary.
It would be nice to think that some at 3D saw Yahtzee's 'review' and felt the burn of shame.
It's going to be even better when he gets hold of it, because that, like the sun coming up has to happen.
It would be nice to think that some at 3D saw Yahtzee's 'review' and felt the burn of shame.
It's going to be even better when he gets hold of it, because that, like the sun coming up has to happen.
This game did not need to be "saved", it needed to be forgotten. There are so many things this money and time could have been better spent on. Shame on everyone that buys this game and all of the developers. I really, really wish this whole damn thing just never happened.
No. it will be delayed at least twice more to eternity. I have no faith in anyone anymore. I have been lied to one too many times.
/sarcasm
/sarcasm
Not gonna lie... this sounds incredibly annoying in many ways. I never was into the "SHOOT THEM BECAUSE IT'S MANLY" games, and I doubt this will make me fall for it.
Your avatar totally makes that statement more meaningful. It's freaking me out!Evil the White said:
Yeeeah *masculine grunting* the DUUUKE is coming!
FIIIINALLLY! And it's going to be AWESOME (capital letters for more emphasis), because the DEVELOPER said so, they put in a self-ironic sentence and because, you know, like, it's THE DUUKKE! Oh god this is gonna be soo much FUN, because this is the first FPS the developer's advertise with it being F..gohohohoooood.
Can't even seriously pretend to be heated up about this.
Honestly, what am I supposed to be interested about here?
The Duke? Yeah, right, because anyone who's got enough brain matter to not get distracted by shiny things still gives a crap about this character.
Boobies? Erm...I'm still on the internet here, right? Is there really anyone left here who thinks a Duke-game will give him or her more, better or better looking full-frontal nudity than literally ANYTHING on the net you can get for free?
Gameplay? Yeeesss, right. Let's look at Susan's report.
-Brainless plot no one cares about until someone mentions "hot women"? Check.
-Some Aliens no one gives a crap about as opponents? Check.
-Some "stylistic" hooks to apply to the pseudo-masculine, grunting, wannabe-cool demographic (like cigars, gore, football, trucks, dick jokes, displayed urination and absolutele lack of any behaviour (because we likez sem rebels))? Check.
-Absolutely unimpressive and generic gameplay that the developer as well as the author of this article washes quickly over so no one notices the pure blandness of it? Check.
Oh and of course this:
Oh, let me do it for you: http://www.threepanelsoul.com/view.php?date=2008-03-24
I personally see it as an insult to believe that the gaming community can be treated like that. First letting us wait for more then ten years, always trying to keep us on our toes with some fake news and half-assed screenshots to now jump up and say "Hey, it's us dickheads again and this time we actually mean it, spend your money on us." That's right, 3D-Realms actively told the community over and over and over again that it's coming soon, even when the mostuninterested shlock could already predict where this project would be going. Where I come from, that's called lying. And even if the time and era of a blonde, brick-headed sexist who saves the world wouldn't already be over for a looong time, it's because of this behaviour from the developers' side that I couldn't care less about the Duke or whatever studio stands behind it.
Will it be a financial success IF it indeed should come out? Sadly I think it will. Because as soon as the funny masses can throw themself at something they think will make them look "cool" they probably will and I can't wait for the endless discussions about this game which will undoubtedly end in the pro-Duke faction either laughing retarded and trying to make an argument by claiming "But man, it's the DUUUUUKE!" or stating that "If I don't like it I don't have, like, to play it."
Yeah, thanks Captain Obvious and Lt. Voidargument. I think I'll roll with that.
FIIIINALLLY! And it's going to be AWESOME (capital letters for more emphasis), because the DEVELOPER said so, they put in a self-ironic sentence and because, you know, like, it's THE DUUKKE! Oh god this is gonna be soo much FUN, because this is the first FPS the developer's advertise with it being F..gohohohoooood.
Can't even seriously pretend to be heated up about this.
Honestly, what am I supposed to be interested about here?
The Duke? Yeah, right, because anyone who's got enough brain matter to not get distracted by shiny things still gives a crap about this character.
Boobies? Erm...I'm still on the internet here, right? Is there really anyone left here who thinks a Duke-game will give him or her more, better or better looking full-frontal nudity than literally ANYTHING on the net you can get for free?
Gameplay? Yeeesss, right. Let's look at Susan's report.
-Brainless plot no one cares about until someone mentions "hot women"? Check.
-Some Aliens no one gives a crap about as opponents? Check.
-Some "stylistic" hooks to apply to the pseudo-masculine, grunting, wannabe-cool demographic (like cigars, gore, football, trucks, dick jokes, displayed urination and absolutele lack of any behaviour (because we likez sem rebels))? Check.
-Absolutely unimpressive and generic gameplay that the developer as well as the author of this article washes quickly over so no one notices the pure blandness of it? Check.
Oh and of course this:
Oh, it's "a good time". Well thanks, because now that I know that it's "a good time" I feel completely informed. I bet it's also "solid", "unique in its style" and "interesting". Why didn't you just say straightforward that there's nothing really to talk about this hype-pulled tross but because of the aforementioned aspects it has the same entertainment value of a flickering lightbulb?
Oh, let me do it for you: http://www.threepanelsoul.com/view.php?date=2008-03-24
I personally see it as an insult to believe that the gaming community can be treated like that. First letting us wait for more then ten years, always trying to keep us on our toes with some fake news and half-assed screenshots to now jump up and say "Hey, it's us dickheads again and this time we actually mean it, spend your money on us." That's right, 3D-Realms actively told the community over and over and over again that it's coming soon, even when the mostuninterested shlock could already predict where this project would be going. Where I come from, that's called lying. And even if the time and era of a blonde, brick-headed sexist who saves the world wouldn't already be over for a looong time, it's because of this behaviour from the developers' side that I couldn't care less about the Duke or whatever studio stands behind it.
Will it be a financial success IF it indeed should come out? Sadly I think it will. Because as soon as the funny masses can throw themself at something they think will make them look "cool" they probably will and I can't wait for the endless discussions about this game which will undoubtedly end in the pro-Duke faction either laughing retarded and trying to make an argument by claiming "But man, it's the DUUUUUKE!" or stating that "If I don't like it I don't have, like, to play it."
Yeah, thanks Captain Obvious and Lt. Voidargument. I think I'll roll with that.