Poll: Advice?

[dragonslayer32]

Hello fellow Escapists, i need your help. A couple of nights ago, me and a girl from uni kissed after she told me she liked me. So, I was considering asking her out until I recieved a text from my ex asking me if I want to get back together. Now, the girl from uni is smart, funny and has a great personality but she is not the best looking girl in the world. My ex however is the complete opposite, extremely good looking but very dull. We ended on good terms (even though she cheated on me) but I am not sure if I can trust her. I am totally torn and would appreciate your help.

Also, to add discussion value, has anyone else been in a similar situation? Would you guys take looks or personality?

 

[Leemaster777]

Dude, personality every time.

Looks don't REALLY matter in the long run.

 

[Dags90]

You're 19. The long run probably isn't going to matter, so go with looks imo. Unless you're already looking to settle down for good, but I'd advise against that until after uni.

 

[Zombie_Fish]

Moved to Advice Forum.

--Zombie

 

[D Moness]

beauty is skindeep.

Plus your ex cheated on you ones what makes you 100% sure she wouldn't do that again

 

[The Stonker]

Personality.
Plus, there is a reason why you dumped your ex girlfriend, wasn't it?
Go ahead and make up a new relationship with this girl.

 

[Jedoro]

To paraphrase Ron White, plastic surgery can fix looks but you can't fix stupid.

Personality FTW

 

[Snake Plissken]

Both of them. Seriously. If you can't get the total package in one girl, you can find it in both of them. At least for a little while.

 

[CCountZero]

Well.

Either you one-night your Ex and go after the new girl, or you just stick to the new girl altogether.

Looks are great for one-nighters and "playmates", but in the long run personality takes the cake.

Also, personally I can't deal with a girl cheating. I want to say I don't mind, 'cause I don't believe sex is the same as love, but thinking of her cheating forces me to think of another dude having his way with her, and I can't deal with that mental picture... so cheaters are out for me.

 

[Wildcard5]

I would go for personality. Time shall strip away everyones vain looks, and enhance their brilliant personalities.

 

[Thedayrecker]

I know this girl with a great personality. However, I went after her better looking friend instead. Long story short good-looking girl never amounted to much, and I'm secretly, madly in love with great personality girl, because of her great personality. Unfortunatly, now she has a boyfriend (as in long term, not some stupid high school relationships that last a week).... *sigh*

Moral of the story: Always go for personality.

 

[zama174]

Well.

Either you one-night your Ex and go after the new girl, or you just stick to the new girl altogether.

Looks are great for one-nighters and "playmates", but in the long run personality takes the cake.

Also, personally I can't deal with a girl cheating. I want to say I don't mind, 'cause I don't believe sex is the same as love, but thinking of her cheating forces me to think of another dude having his way with her, and I can't deal with that mental picture... so cheaters are out for me.

^ What he said.. Look hoes will be hoes, cheaters gonna cheat, and bitches will be crazy.. Why would you think about going back to that? Either one night her or don't touch her again.

 

[stormtrooper9091]

forget about ex, it will be better for you in the long run to stay with the new girl

 

[viranimus]

Ok, fine Ill be the shallow one here.

If your still in school, go for looks. Dont get serious as inevitably the girls in question are likely only to be so serious themselves. Theres plenty of time in your life to find someone who gets you and has a great personallity, but for now, while you still have the chance, go for the shallow end and sate your own personal fun first.

Thing is... if your with someone long enough, no matter how great they may be, there is a DAMNED good chance that you will get to a point where everything about their personallity gets on your ever loving nerves. So you get tied up with a girl based on personallity when your young, and say 50 years later still with them, do you really want to look back on your life and say, yeah i married my best friend, but I really didnt have any fun in my wild and crazy days.

"The memories of a man in his old age, are the deeds of a man in his prime" - Pink Floyd.

 

[Ubervelt]

Personality mate. This new girl might not look fantastic, but looks mean nothing. You will find that she will be so much better to be around and to that an chick that does not care or respect you (otherwise she would not have cheated on you).

Would you rather a chick to go out with you because you look good, or because you are a truly worthwhile person to be with? Not a hard decision

It will also make her feel over the moon to know you are with her for who she is not what she looks like

 

[Gilhelmi]

Personality wins every time. Go with personality and you will get hurt less.

 

[WeOwnTheSky]

Personality. Looks only go so far. How far can your relationship really develop if you can't really talk about anything, or have interesting conversations.

Plus, if the girl cheated on you, can you really learn to trust her completely again?
Go with the uni girl.

 

[Yureina]

Hello fellow Escapists, i need your help. A couple of nights ago, me and a girl from uni kissed after she told me she liked me. So, I was considering asking her out until I recieved a text from my ex asking me if I want to get back together. Now, the girl from uni is smart, funny and has a great personality but she is not the best looking girl in the world. My ex however is the complete opposite, extremely good looking but very dull. We ended on good terms (even though she cheated on me) but I am not sure if I can trust her. I am totally torn and would appreciate your help.

Also, to add discussion value, has anyone else been in a similar situation? Would you guys take looks or personality?

I'm not trying to be insulting, but... why would you ever want to get back together with someone who cheated on you? That would seem to me, looks or no looks, to be an immediate deal-breaker no matter what. Its even worse that you see her as having a lousy personality as well. I think that solves your question right there. It might just be my personal morals, but someone who cheated on me is someone who I would want nothing to do with once I had gotten them out of my life. Nothing at all.

Take the person you have met recently, and not your ex. Looks are nice, but in the end that's all they are. You may find something wonderful in this other person that is far more beautiful than anything your ex may have had. :3

Hope that helps!

 

[zehydra]

Well considering you've clearly won over the former, I'd go with her. Start anew. Whatever you do, I wouldn't go back to your ex the day after kissing some girl who tells you she likes you.

 

[Naheal]

Um. You already broke things off with someone on a trust issue and you want to give her another chance? What's that quote about insanity again?

Abrasive though that is, you need to realize that trust is an exceedingly important thing in relationships. Your ex has already proven that she's untrustworthy, so why would you want to put your hand in that fire again? You're only going to get burned, and this time it might be worse.

Furthermore? Looks fade. Personalities change. The only difference between the two is that personalities change based upon who you're with and what you go through and can get better with time. You may grow closer with the girl with the personality.