Poll: Being 'Whipped.'

[chadachada123]

Where I come from "whipped" means "slave." As in, my friend is whipped because he does everything his girlfriend wants and never questions her.

Using that definition, it's pretty annoying when one of my friends won't stop obsessing over his new girlfriend and constantly tries to appease her, generally at the expense of us other friends.

No, I will not recognize any other definition for the purposes of this discussion.

 

[Dags90]

I don't really know what `whipped` means.
I mean, my boyfriend has been accused of being `whipped` for looking after me when I had the flu. I got accused of `running around after him` for looking after him when he had glandular fever (apparently some people believe you should just run for the hills if your partner gets sick!).

I could see the merit in this. What if you get sick from him? Then you're both sick and everyone is miserable.

This can happen in all kind of relationships, but in my experience it's normally the guys who are 'whipped', I normally assume it's due to fear of not getting sex, or fear of not being in a relationship.

TBH, there are an infinite number of ways it plays out. I've seen guys who act whipped, then passive-aggressively criticize the decisions their girlfriend makes, when they're stuck with making ALL of the decisions.

I honestly don't know how people put up being in relationships with people who fall into the "whipped" role. I want a partner, not a puppy.

 

[Zack Alklazaris]

I'm whipped and love it . It takes all the guesswork out of relationships . There is a certain freedom in being told what to do all the time . The requirements for making her happy is clearly layed on the table . As opposed to wondering what would she want me to do or what would make her happy .

Exactly this, though I'm not sure how far you go compared to me.

At the very beginning of my relationship I told her flat out that I don't always know when I piss people off so to please tell me right away. This leads to her having "conversations" with me weekly. However, our problems get solved and it makes us closer because nothing stays bottled up.

I love her dearly and will do anything for her. My friends poke fun of me because I'm known to drive 20 miles into town in the middle of the night to get her a burger. I like stroking her hair and showering her with kisses. She too has certain things that make her happy. Its like a failsafe.

A stuffed animal, flowers, chocolate, or something geeky for when she's sad.
When she doesn't feel good apple juice, Gatorade, chocolate milk.
Steak n Shake shooters n fries for when shes hungry

I've got it down to a religion to be honest.

The dominance goes into the bedroom as well. While I am a switch I do lean towards submissive. Being told what to do brings some relaxation and power play into it, which can be a lot of fun.

So yes I'm whipped in every sense of the word, but its a good whipped. The results for listening and doing what your wife says is immensely rewarding to say the least.

 

[Mr Binary]

I personally believe that a couple should be equal, as I see it as more of a partnership than anything. If someone is 'whipped' and they don't mind it, sure whatever it's their own choice. The only time I ever get involved in stuff like this is usually when it's so one-sided that it turns into abuse.

 

[Stasisesque]

Those kinds of relationships never work. Girls don't like guys who put them on a pedestal and let them do whatever they want with them. They lose interest fast. They want someone who is their equal. And if they're not the ones to lose interest, then guys lose interest. And when that happens, the girl goes berserk because she can no longer control the guy.

How long have you been in a relationship with your current girlfriend? Perhaps you're not yet out of the infatuation stage. Which is nice, I suppose. It's a good feeling being completely obsessed with each other. But once that wears off, and it always does, two things can happen. You realize that you're not actually in love, which can be depressing, or your love matures and you bond even more. If that happens, and I hope it does, it's the best thing in the world.

Oh god it's the generalisation monster!

I know a couple who are a literal D/s couple, one always does what the other says because they are contracted to do so. Yes, literally contracted. Serious D/s lifestyles have rules and regulations. Hell, these contracts stand up in court the same way a prenuptial agreement would. They've been married for a decade or more now. Yeah it's not necessarily the same thing if you're trying to control someone who doesn't enjoy that sort of thing, but sometimes people stumble into these relationships and find they suit them just fine.

Relationships don't last if one or more partner is unhappy, if everyone is satisfied, they generally (though not always) last. Hell, if one person is unhappy and let's the other one know, the relationship has a chance.

The only reason I've jumped on you for this is because I hate seeing people told their relationship won't work. It is a horrible thing to hear - no matter how truthful it may be.

 

[Fasckira]

Some people like to be dominated, why should it really bother anyone outside of the relationship?

 

[Jamous]

Not really; we have a pretty decent relationship and if either of us thinks that the other's asking for something out of order we'll usually make it known. Literal whipping, however... >
On an aside, as it seems to have come about in the thread already, I wouldn't really class a full D/s relationship as being whipped really. When you (Original Post) talk about being whipped it just doesn't seem to be the same dynamic as D/s. Of course, everyone has different tastes and different experiences, but hey.

 

[Stasisesque]

On an aside, as it seems to have come about in the thread already, I wouldn't really class a full D/s relationship as being whipped really. When you (Original Post) talk about being whipped it just doesn't seem to be the same dynamic as D/s. Of course, everyone has different tastes and different experiences, but hey.

Yeah, I knew bringing it up was a bad idea as I was typing.

I only referenced it because the couple I was talking about did come into the relationship because they discovered they enjoyed the control/submission aspects of being just a little bit whipped. I guess there are lots of people who just know what they want right off the bat, but plenty who enjoy something new so much they make it official.

 

[Vamantha]

I don't think either person in my relationship is whipped. We just do whatever and the other is fine with it. Either we don't give a fuck or we're just very laid back equals.

 

[Skratt]

I'll admit, I'm completely whipped to my girlfriend. My friends give me a lot of shit about it but I really don't care. I enjoy being whipped. So what are your general thoughts about being 'whipped'? Are you whipped? Do you like having a whipped partner?

A better question, does she like you being whipped? I guess you'll find out in time if she stays or goes.

It's been my experience that being whipped is a bad thing. Been whipped and been with someone that was whipped. If the person being whipped isn't themselves, it's an open sore on the relationship that festers over time.

 

[Jamous]

On an aside, as it seems to have come about in the thread already, I wouldn't really class a full D/s relationship as being whipped really. When you (Original Post) talk about being whipped it just doesn't seem to be the same dynamic as D/s. Of course, everyone has different tastes and different experiences, but hey.

Yeah, I knew bringing it up was a bad idea as I was typing.

I only referenced it because the couple I was talking about did come into the relationship because they discovered they enjoyed the control/submission aspects of being just a little bit whipped. I guess there are lots of people who just know what they want right off the bat, but plenty who enjoy something new so much they make it official.

Hey its cool. Surely it's best to talk about all these things rather than just keep assumptions about them? Besides, it's a good bit of interesting conversation. Also, with the ridiculous amount of variety involved with peoples' sexual preferences it really doesn't surprise me that some people like to be whipped in relationships; even if that same person were to entirely eschew D/s stuff.
Oh god Rope Burn is my Captcha. How apt.

 

[roushutsu]

In general, I say that the partnership should be equal, but if both are happy with 1 partner being whipped then go for it. The only time I would take issue with it is when it's clear that it goes beyond. Being "whipped" is one thing; controlling your partner's life is another. Fortunately I haven't faced such issues, but I've seen aspects of control in my little brother's relationships.

 

[Noswad]

Well I'm just glad I'm not the only one here who thought this was going to be about something completely different. I was thinking that's a bit risky for the escapist.

A certain amount of whipping can be fine, one partner taking the lead in a relationship can be beneficial in some but not all situations. However it can go badly wrong, I've seen situations where one half completely controls the relationship, to the extent where if you address one the other answers.

Me? I'm more of a switch.

 

[Fappy]

I've been whipped before.

Never again.

 

[Icaruss]

Is it weird that i kinda(badly) want to be?

 

[Dusty Donuts]

I've been whipped before.

Never again.

I didn't even need to be whipped to know that I really never want it to happen.
Not that I'll realize at the time. It'll probably just all be "Huh...other friends?" and THEN you realize you're whipped after you're standing at the altar.

Is it weird that i kinda(badly) want to be?

You might have a poor idea of "whipped" actually means. It basically boils down to abandoning your old friends for the girlfriend, as far as I've seen from the way it's used.

 

[Fappy]

I've been whipped before.

Never again.

I didn't even need to be whipped to know that I really never want it to happen.
Not that I'll realize at the time. It'll probably just all be "Huh...other friends?" and THEN you realize you're whipped after you're standing at the altar.

Is it weird that i kinda(badly) want to be?

You might have a poor idea of "whipped" actually means. It basically boils down to abandoning your old friends for the girlfriend, as far as I've seen from the way it's used.

I was in denial at the time >.>

 

[Frankster]

Unless its a kinky dominatrix I doubt any woman will whip me, love my freedoms way too much.

As for peeps being whipped: well I've lost touched with friends completely courtesy of their gfs, not cool when it happens but well, what can ya do?

 

[AngloDoom]

As much fun as it can be to have one side of a relationship take over particular responsibilities and such, the moment that the other person's opinion is seriously discounted in actual conversation is the moment when the resentment starts to breed.

If you let your partner make the decisions on where to go out for a meal, but one day you found a place you really wanted to go to only to have it immediately disregarded by your partner, I'm sure you'd feel a tad miffed. The illusion of empowerment or submission can be fun, actually 'whipping' your partner isn't fun: except the literal kind of whipping, that's great.


Then again, I'm extraordinarily paranoid about these sorts of things since I've had a couple of girlfriends who were obsessed with masculinity and dominance, to the point that I once got randomly attacked by a couple of guys and my girlfriend admittedly she found me less attractive for not suddenly turning into Neo and judo-chopping them to death. My opinions may very well be skewed in this matter.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

If you let your partner make the decisions on where to go out for a meal, but one day you found a place you really wanted to go to only to have it immediately disregarded by your partner, I'm sure you'd feel a tad miffed.

No, they'd be the ones who'd end up feeling miffed as I'd go where I wanted and they could either come along, go where they wanted or stay at home and have a sandwich.

It can be amusing to deal with people who mistake my indifference towards a lot of things for passivity and/or submission. Seeing people do the 'muh-muh-muh' goldfish face of shocked surprise is one of my guilty pleasures.