Poll: Breastfeeding in public

[Mimzical]

I've read up to the 10th page, and one thing that is really starting to get to me is why some people are putting their penis as equal to breasts.

Penis =/= Breasts.

Penis = Vagina. They are what is used for excretion, another analogy that has been put as equal to breastfeeding. Put either of those on show, and it's public indecency.

Breasts = Man's chest, nipples and all. Anatomically, they are effectively equal, even if they are socially perceived as different (breasts being more sexualised, for example). And many people don't have this problem with a man's chest (or at least most hold their tongue if they do, from what I've seen). Feels like double-standards to me.

On-topic: I've seen a woman breast-feed her child out in public before, in a restaurant even. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. And I'm a lesbian, I too see and enjoy breasts in a sexual context. But I can still see the difference to using a breast for a baby's dinner, which is their primary function, to enjoying tits during sex, which is secondary. There is no need to sexualise the primary function. Besides, I am another who thinks a hungry, screaming child is more bothersome than noticing a mother breastfeeding her child.

 

[FamoFunk]

Words.

By asking why a Woman cannot go in to a toilet to feed a baby is pretty much saying She cannot Breast feed.

I'm not talking from my arse, it's how your pathetic post came across.

 

[Doctor Glocktor]

Words.

By asking why a Woman cannot go in to a toilet to feed a baby is pretty much saying She cannot Breast feed.

I'm not talking from my arse, it's how your pathetic post came across.

No, asking a woman to go somewhere more private because *literally* everyone else has to. Politeness asks that I go to the washroom in order to scratch my balls; that's pretty much saying I can't scratch my balls.

If you're not talking straight outta you're ass, then tell, how did formula get pulled into the conversation, and more importantly, as you so eloquently put it, how DID I think formula was invented? You seem to know this about me much better then I do.

 

[FamoFunk]

Words.

By asking why a Woman cannot go in to a toilet to feed a baby is pretty much saying She cannot Breast feed.

I'm not talking from my arse, it's how your pathetic post came across.

No, asking a woman to go somewhere more private because *literally* everyone else has to. Politeness asks that I go to the washroom in order to scratch my balls; that's pretty much saying I can't scratch my balls.

If you're not talking straight outta you're ass, then tell, how did formula get pulled into the conversation, and more importantly, as you so eloquently put it, how DID I think formula was invented? You seem to know this about me much better then I do.

As I was one of these disgusting woman who did get my breasts to feed my baby, yes, I do know quite a bit from doing it myself and research and education.

I really cannot see where you're going with this whole ball scratching thing. Your balls do not feed a human, so we don't need to see them.
When you order food in a restaurant, do you hide in the toilet to eat it? No. Then why should a baby when they have their dinner.

I must ask - how do you feel about lads mags etc. Where tits are hanging out everywhere in a sexual way, the way they weren't actually designed for?

I pulled formula in because everyone who is against natural breast feeding or thinks it should be hidden away always pulls out the argument "Well, she can always give the baby a formula bottle"

I'm on my phone so really can't add anymore with out my phone playing up.

 

[DreadfulSorry]

It doesn't bother me. haha, my professor actually breastfed her daughter once while we were meeting at her house about a paper of mine, we just kept talking about Roman coin iconography like nothing was happening.
The argument that women should take their child into the bathroom to breastfeed bothers me a little: would YOU want to eat in a bathroom? I didn't think so. I certainly wouldn't want to feed my (hypothetical) child in a restroom. I can kind of understand why some people would feel uncomfortable about it, but if it bothers you that much, then just don't watch. PDA makes me uncomfortable, but I don't go around telling people they can't do it. Babies gotta eat, and I personally would much rather have a woman whip her boob out than have a screaming, hungry baby in close proximity to me.

 

[Doctor Glocktor]

Words.

By asking why a Woman cannot go in to a toilet to feed a baby is pretty much saying She cannot Breast feed.

I'm not talking from my arse, it's how your pathetic post came across.

No, asking a woman to go somewhere more private because *literally* everyone else has to. Politeness asks that I go to the washroom in order to scratch my balls; that's pretty much saying I can't scratch my balls.

If you're not talking straight outta you're ass, then tell, how did formula get pulled into the conversation, and more importantly, as you so eloquently put it, how DID I think formula was invented? You seem to know this about me much better then I do.

As I was one of these disgusting woman who did get my breasts to feed my baby, yes, I do know quite a bit from doing it myself and research and education.

I really cannot see where you're going with this whole ball scratching thing. Your balls do not feed a human, so we don't need to see them.
When you order food in a restaurant, do you hide in the toilet to eat it? No. Then why should a baby when they have their dinner.

I must ask - how do you feel about lads mags etc. Where tits are hanging out everywhere in a sexual way, the way they weren't actually designed for?

I pulled formula in because everyone who is against natural breast feeding or thinks it should be hidden away always pulls out the argument "Well, she can always give the baby a formula bottle"

I'm on my phone so really can't add anymore with out my phone playing up.

I bring up my ball scratching because its a double standard, and when people bring it up as the double standard, they're told to get over it.

I'm using it, because in our society, right now, not what it should be, will be, has been, or whatever, says that breasts are right up there with balls as being a no-no to show. And yet, when a woman whips out her tits and people are uncomfortable with it, those people are told to shut up and deal with it. But if I bring out my balls in the exact same way, I'm told its rude and obscene; even though they're just as 'natural' as tits.

And I won't bring my food to the toilet because I'm not eating my food in a way that's offensive to other people; nor do am I arrogant enough to believe I have the right to tell people to shut up and deal when there are alternatives that work for everyone. As in, the formula that you loathe so much, or going to the bathroom.

 

[Ghengis John]

As part of the post college crowd, I find myself to be exposed via facebook to a stream of expectant mothers posting various issues that pertain to pregnant life. That being said, I once had the bad sense to openly argue with a pregnant woman's opinion on the topic of breastfeeding.

As a 20 something man, I feel perfectly justified NOT wanting to see certain things when I go out into public. Its not because I think its wrong to breastfeed, or even because its supposedly "obscene". It just strikes me as something that should be done privately.

The debate between us "raged" mostly because she found my different opinion offensive, but still I persisted, because I was absolutely sure about one thing above all else. Any time I see breastfeeding in public, I turn my head and am forced to make an effort to not look. If its being done in a restaurant, I have trouble continuing to eat without staring directly at my plate.

I understand the desire to be free to feed your child, but I don't understand why Im such a terrible person for thinking that it should be a more private action.

What are your thoughts?

I'm of two minds. Breast feeding is a perfectly natural things and in a lot of countries people do that in public and nobody's weirded out by it. Furthermore I think it's good for kids to see an application of the breast that isn't sexual or sensationalized. For some reason it strikes me as beneficial for kids to learn that breasts are normal.

That said if you're breast feeding in public, don't stare at me like I'm some sort of pervert if I'm surprised and I do a double take or if I'm lost in thought and just happen to be staring in your direction. You're whipping your boobs out in a public place, I really wasn't staring but you should expect that sort of thing.

 

[Altorin]

my view is, babies need to eat, and a mother shouldn't have to excuse herself to feed her baby. Most women aren't exhibitionists though, so they typically try to at least cover themselves while doing it. Noone forces you to look at them. Most mothers tend to be discreet and are just doing what they have to do.

Does it make me slightly uncomfortable? Perhaps. But That's MY issue, not theirs. Women have been fighting for these sorts of rights for a long time, and I think it would certainly be a step backwards to take them away.

 

[DevilWolf47]

My thoughts? Get over it! Squeamishness is not a viable excuse for restricting basic biological functions. The poor woman was unfortunate to reproduce, let her feed the kid and keep it quiet instead of having to run to a private room with a screaming, grabby baby.

 

[Chemical Alia]

I'm less opposed to it than I am to seeing couples make out in public, but it's not something I particularly want to see. Admittedly, I'm not very educated on the needs of new mothers and early child raising, so I don't know much about how important it is.

 

[Girl With One Eye]

I saw a woman brestfeeding on the bus once and it did make me feel a bit uncomfortable but not to the point where I would tell her to get off the bus or cover up the baby. If a baby needs to be fed I guess all you can do is feed it. I suppose its a slightly different story if its in a restaurant but it wouldn't bother me enough to make a fuss about it.

 

[badpun]

I don't really have any problem with it, i mean it was a little awkward when a lady did on the train on the seat opposite me but thats more society's infuence on me than any strong feelings i have about it. Honestly its legal, they're going to do it and just get used to it i guess

 

[Flare Phoenix]

Personally I don't see why we just don't introduce some place women can breastfeed privately. We have toilets so people can wee and poo privately, so why not? Now I'm not 100% sure how the whole thing works, so there could be some issue with that I'm not seeing, but it seems like it could work.

Some women do go to the restroom to breastfeed, that's perfectly fine. Still, I think the principle of the matter of freedom and whatnot.

But see that is where my problem lies. In every other situation, a woman pulls out her breasts she'd get slapped with indicent exposure, but apparently it is perfectly acceptable if there is a child involved. People might say it is only a problem because society has sexualised breasts to the point we are uncomfortable with them, but that's true of most things. Most swear words are only considered offensive because society has convinced us we should be offended by them.

Now, I'm not saying women should not be allowed to breastfeed in public (not really around the issue to really care about it), but I don't think we should be living in a society where you can fuck everyone else's feelings purely because you are a mother. In my opinion, it is just as much the mother's responsibility to reduce the awkwardness as much as it is the people who are been disturbed.

My point is, it's funny to me how the argument completely changes purely because there is a young child involved.

 

[Dags90]

But see that is where my problem lies. In every other situation, a woman pulls out her breasts she'd get slapped with indicent exposure, but apparently it is perfectly acceptable if there is a child involved.

I've already covered this rather exhaustively, but this isn't really always the case. A lot of jurisdictions giving women the same right to be shirtless as men. And they really should have that right and they shouldn't need a child to get it. According to The Journal of Sexual Medicine, just over 50% of men experience enhanced arousal from their nipples, compared with just over 70% for women.[footnote]http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1743-6109.2006.00230.x/full[/footnote] From a scientific standpoint, there's not much difference in the sexual nature of nipples.

 

[Flare Phoenix]

But see that is where my problem lies. In every other situation, a woman pulls out her breasts she'd get slapped with indicent exposure, but apparently it is perfectly acceptable if there is a child involved.

I've already covered this rather exhaustively, but this isn't really always the case. A lot of jurisdictions giving women the same right to be shirtless as men. And they really should have that right and they shouldn't need a child to get it. According to The Journal of Sexual Medicine, just over 50% of men experience enhanced arousal from their nipples, compared with just over 70% for women.[footnote]http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1743-6109.2006.00230.x/full[/footnote] From a scientific standpoint, there's not much difference in the sexual nature of nipples.

Yeah I've never quite understood why the nipple is apparently the sexual part. Like you can show a picture of a completely topless woman and if the nipple is covered up that is apparently okay.

 

[Dags90]

Yeah I've never quite understood why the nipple is apparently the sexual part. Like you can show a picture of a completely topless woman and if the nipple is covered up that is apparently okay.

I asked, facetiously of course, if it would be OK to post pictures of topless women as long as I photoshopped a man's nipples over their obscene lady parts.

Also, someone above posted that men having nipples at all is a genetic defect, that's really sloppy terminology. It would be more appropriate to call them vestigial.

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

blah blah blah blah blah blah

So you're saying that all mothers should be locked inside their house all their lives? As someone who knows a person who has to stay indoors 100% of her time, it's a fucking dreadful experience. If I personally couldn't leave the house, I'd probably off myself.

Geez, some people here seem to be looking at mothers like they're doing a disservice to humanity for raising a baby.

No. No one said that. Too much hate and not enough humor in this thread.

Mommy can fill up a bottle ahead of time if she's going out in public and is bringing her potentially hungry baby.

Filling a spare bottle or two is sometimes easier said than done. Not all women produce equal amounts of milk.

 

[Ultrajoe]

How dare, how dare I say, that woman drag herself out of the house where she might inconvenience you with the sight of a perfectly natural phenomenon.

Come on, boyo, she went through nine months of relative hell and then squeezed a baby out of a hole severely undersized for the job. Now you want her to stay at home, too? Post-natal depression gets so many women in part because of the isolation you'd see mothers go through to prevent you seeing a nipple. You're perfectly justified in not wanting to see it, but she's also perfectly justified in wanting to go out on occasion. Babies get hungry at all hours, man, she's just got to go with the very literal flow.

Counter point, washrooms are relatively private areas, why can't they go to there? They are very literally all over the place, malls, stores, resteraunts, you name it and it probably has a washroom. The only inconvienance to the mother is probably about 20 steps, and it diminishes any awkwardness on either ends.

Not to say I'm against it as it doesn't bother me, but the opportunity is always there.

Except that implying it's socially wrong to be seen breastfeeding your child makes having one an effective taboo. The social isolation of mothers is already awful, and if you make it a social convention to think 'What I'm doing is awful to see', how do you think that makes them feel? Their boobs are spitting out dairy product, the last thing you want to do is insert the idea that this is somehow wrong. As I said, Post-natal depression can be triggered by feelings of oppression or rejection from the community (In conjunction with hormone imbalances of course). Do you really want to tell women that they can, out of politeness, take themselves and their baby to the toilet to eat?

I know you're not against public breastfeeding, but as an option; 'go to the toilet' is basically enforcing millenia of conditioning that says the female body is dirty. Let's not.

 

[dududf]

.

Fair 'nuff regarding how the mother would feel and I agree on the point that the last thing you'd want mothers to feel is embarassment when they are already are ever so confined as they are.

 

[TheLaofKazi]

There are at least a million things that deeply annoy me about people. I think it's a bit unreasonable to expect someone to stop doing something just because it annoys or disgusts you, even more so to want to make it illegal (not saying the OP said that). The moment we turn to inflexible laws to solve problems of simply dealing with people's tiny little things they do out in public is the moment, I think, when we've forgot how to be humans. Society is pretty much dealing with other people. You can have your opinions on what's appropriate and what's not, but what it comes down to is stuff like this simply doesn't matter.