Poll: Dating?

[Betancore]

I date a fair bit, just casually, but I'm not good at the whole relationship thing. I think it can get pretty tedious really quickly though. But mostly it's fun to hang out with someone and have a meal and make an effort to make the other person like you. I always pay for myself, and I try to open my own doors as well. I don't think one should date just for a free meal.

 

[Devi Darkside]

I think that dating is for learning more about someone and to see if you want to be closer with them. Though I've found that the best dates were more random, like hanging out, going for a walk, cooking together or getting something to eat, and going bowling, to an arcade or where ever in case either all goes well, or it doesn't you can still have a good time with them.

But it's been a while.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

I'm English, I don't "date".

I'll enjoy my life of blissful loneliness until I have some kind of crisis brought on by judgemental peers, gushing hormones and fixed societal expectations, and I'll subsoquently marry the first girl that then notices me. We'll have kids, play boggle with the neighbours on Thursday nights. I'll be given friends I don't want in the partners of her friends, they'll throw us together...expecting us to get along because we both kinda like football, grown men on a play date.

I'll grin and bear it, until one day I realise I'm too old to change my life now, and I'll stop resenting her, I'll stop spending my evenings alone in the shed with only the shotgun and the red light bulb to keep me company. I'll even start wearing the cardigans she buys me, and smile and pretend I like them...and in time...I will.

That's how it's done.

 

[Chamale]

I don't date, I just act really friendly to everyone, including girls, and don't occupy myself with getting into any girl's pants.

This method has so far gotten me into 0 pants. It's still preferable to a system that is

just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

I've noticed that a lot of Escapists have serious issues with respecting women.

 

[EnzoHonda]

There's dating and there's dating. I've been on the "Hey, I've never spoken with you for more than 2 seconds, let's go out." type of date, and those suck.

The girl I'm currently seeing was someone I saw and spoke with over a series of two months. We got to know each other a little, and it was clear that we had to go on a date. Big difference between the two. When you already have a connection and know each other, the date is awesome.

 

[capin Rob]

I don't date, If two people love each other than they don't need to go out, they can just enjoy each other.

 

[Bellvedere]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

Not when I can just spend a little on the occasional "fling" with a more "open" woman (i.e. prostitutes). At least the prostitute or the one-night stand or whatever is more up front and honest about it.

I was just curious as to ya'lls take on the whole dating thing?

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

Though I wouldn't mind having a bit of fun with a decent hooker or two.

OMG I'M SO SEXIST!

I believe that the person who asked to go on date should be that pays due to the fact that some of us are rather unwealthy and wouldn't have budgeted for a date especially if it's at a classier joint. Personally, I always offer to split the bill. It is a nice gesture to offer to pay though.

Also as someone mentioned above you're not paying for sex. Dates are for getting to know people. It's your charm and winning personality that 'pay' for sex. If you're just after one night stands asking someone out to dinner isn't the way to go, better sticking to bars and clubs.

The way you wrote the last part seems like your essentially saying you don't like pretty girls because they're pretty and you don't like ugly girls because they're ugly... I have a feeling you're not going to have much luck.

 

[Cyrax987]

Completely way off on the purpose of a date man. Like Bellvedere said, stick to bars and clubs if you're just looking for a one night stand since dates are meant to get to know someone on a personal level.

They don't really ever have to be too formal either just taking a girl to stuff like miniature golf can be a good date.

 

[Phoenix Arrow]

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

I don't think anything else really needs to be said. Come on, meal ticket? What the hell is that? I was in a relationship for 2 years and I've been on dates away from that and there's no such thing as a free meal. Never had one bought for me, never paid for one myself. Is there a reason why you're so down on the idea? There really is no better feeling than being in love, not that that word means anything anymore to most people.

I like to date though, I've been really busy this year though and I haven't really met anyone.

I've noticed that a lot of Escapists have serious issues with respecting women.

Yes. To quote Martin Luther King, "sometiiiimes, I feel discouraged."

 

[Doctor VonSexMachine]

Dates haven't been about a woman getting fed since they entered the work force. Women are no longer dependent on men and their handouts for survival.

Whether some women take advantage of men's generosity based on antiquated norms is another issue entirely. I'll let a man pay for a date if he insists, as not to appear ungrateful. I will however not allow him to do that twice. I want him to know that I enjoy taking the burden of paying as well, it's a small thing you can do to show appreciation.

To be honest though, the only first date where someone has insisted on paying was with a woman. She even went ahead and bought the movie tickets before I could get there. (No, I wasn't late)

 

[Cody211282]

I only take someone out on a rather nice date if I really like them. Hell I usuly get to know a girl before I ever ask them out.

 

[Blueruler182]

Some people have pride, that keeps them away from a prostitute. Girlfriends are less frowned upon. And some people have social skills, and are able to relate to someone who's different than them instead of calling them "pampered beyond repair". And some people like to look for happiness.

But the one's going straight for the crotch are the ones looking for a challenge. Again, social proprieties and pride means a prostitute is just a fallback plan.

 

[starwarsgeek]

Well, all (read: both) my relationships were with girls that I was friends with beforehand, so I really don't have much to offer for the "dating" scene, since I already knew them. However, I think you're concentrating too much on the sex side, and not the personal connection.

 

[likalaruku]

I'm one of those otherworldly people who sees that act of mating as a business partnership that inevitably ends up in a couple of annoying little products, & I don't believe in romance because I'm about as emotional as a Vulcan.

While I'm not exactly a germophobe, I feel like taking a shower if someone so much as touches my shoulder; This means "no sex for fun."

The merger of two independants doesn't need "dating," just go after someone you've been friends with for at least 3 or 5 years, so you already know exacty what to expect & what not to expect from them.

& lastly, I don't think monogomy is natural. If my parner cheated on me, I wouldn't give a shit & ask him or her to bring the other person over for dinner & a night of drunk golfing.

 

[CloggedDonkey]

I... I have never even dated anyone. Ever. Sooooo... I'll get back to you when I finally get a girlfriend.

 

[Kagim]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

That's not dating. That's trying to score. I consider them different things.

A date is essentially just going out spending one on one time with someone you have a romantic interest in. If you just want to fuck then that's all your going to be in a date. A meal ticket. If you find a girl you actually enjoy spending time with a) your date can take place in your home and your costs will be five bucks for popcorn and a rental b) Sex will be the furthest thing from your mind.

I know I know. I sound crazy right? One day you might understand though.

 

[Estocavio]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

That's not dating. That's trying to score. I consider them different things.

A date is essentially just going out spending one on one time with someone you have a romantic interest in. If you just want to fuck then that's all your going to be in a date. A meal ticket. If you find a girl you actually enjoy spending time with a) your date can take place in your home and your costs will be five bucks for popcorn and a rental b) Sex will be the furthest thing from your mind.

I know I know. I sound crazy right? One day you might understand though.

My dating method is rather unique - She has to buy everything. If she doesnt, she isnt willing to even try to do anything, so i dont bother with her. If she does, its a show of initiative at least. I dont provide anything monetarily until after at least the fifth time.

Its rather efficient actually.
It renders the female unable to exploit you in any level.
Incidentally i carry a constantly running voice recorder at all times.

 

[Kagim]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

That's not dating. That's trying to score. I consider them different things.

A date is essentially just going out spending one on one time with someone you have a romantic interest in. If you just want to fuck then that's all your going to be in a date. A meal ticket. If you find a girl you actually enjoy spending time with a) your date can take place in your home and your costs will be five bucks for popcorn and a rental b) Sex will be the furthest thing from your mind.

I know I know. I sound crazy right? One day you might understand though.

My dating method is rather unique - She has to buy everything. If she doesnt, she isnt willing to even try to do anything, so i dont bother with her. If she does, its a show of initiative at least. I dont provide anything monetarily until after at least the fifth time.

Its rather efficient actually.
It renders the female unable to exploit you in any level.
Incidentally i carry a constantly running voice recorder at all times.

What if her reason for not wanting to pay for everything the first five dates is because she doesn't want to be used herself?

Not trying To be a dick, serious question. I know guys who don't pay for anything to exploit the girl and leave once she is no longer willing to shell out. You could screw yourself out of a good relationship in your attempt to avoid being used because she thinks your using her.

 

[Dr Snakeman]

Heh... I picked "hookers and hos", just because I love that that was an option.

But no, my relations with the opposite sex are very, very limited. I don't date.

 

[Estocavio]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

That's not dating. That's trying to score. I consider them different things.

A date is essentially just going out spending one on one time with someone you have a romantic interest in. If you just want to fuck then that's all your going to be in a date. A meal ticket. If you find a girl you actually enjoy spending time with a) your date can take place in your home and your costs will be five bucks for popcorn and a rental b) Sex will be the furthest thing from your mind.

I know I know. I sound crazy right? One day you might understand though.

My dating method is rather unique - She has to buy everything. If she doesnt, she isnt willing to even try to do anything, so i dont bother with her. If she does, its a show of initiative at least. I dont provide anything monetarily until after at least the fifth time.

Its rather efficient actually.
It renders the female unable to exploit you in any level.
Incidentally i carry a constantly running voice recorder at all times.

What if her reason for not wanting to pay for everything the first five dates is because she doesn't want to be used herself?

Not trying To be a dick, serious question. I know guys who don't pay for anything to exploit the girl and leave once she is no longer willing to shell out. You could screw yourself out of a good relationship in your attempt to avoid being used because she thinks your using her.

Thats a very reasonable contradiction; My explanation is simply that its a two sided coin - Either the man or the woman has to pay for it, and it seems to be obligatory that the man does it as a way to prove something to the woman. But in doing so, he is serving her interests to great extent but his own very little, and since dates rarely get further than a few dinners or some othersuch, its wasteful on his part.

Incidentally this has only worked four times, and its perfectly reasonable for the other person to decline, but the way i see it is that besides tradition, theres no reason it has to be the male who does the spending.
And i think the woman should have to prove she isnt just leeching off you.