Poll: Dating?

[Jedoro]

I go on dates with girlfriends, but I don't ask girls on dates in hopes they become girlfriends.

Since it's a relationship, we both pretty much take turns paying, and we enjoy the company, so it's not really me just spending money.

 

[Boris Goodenough]

Most women pay their own way, unless you insist.

 

[Kagim]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

That's not dating. That's trying to score. I consider them different things.

A date is essentially just going out spending one on one time with someone you have a romantic interest in. If you just want to fuck then that's all your going to be in a date. A meal ticket. If you find a girl you actually enjoy spending time with a) your date can take place in your home and your costs will be five bucks for popcorn and a rental b) Sex will be the furthest thing from your mind.

I know I know. I sound crazy right? One day you might understand though.

My dating method is rather unique - She has to buy everything. If she doesnt, she isnt willing to even try to do anything, so i dont bother with her. If she does, its a show of initiative at least. I dont provide anything monetarily until after at least the fifth time.

Its rather efficient actually.
It renders the female unable to exploit you in any level.
Incidentally i carry a constantly running voice recorder at all times.

What if her reason for not wanting to pay for everything the first five dates is because she doesn't want to be used herself?

Not trying To be a dick, serious question. I know guys who don't pay for anything to exploit the girl and leave once she is no longer willing to shell out. You could screw yourself out of a good relationship in your attempt to avoid being used because she thinks your using her.

Thats a very reasonable contradiction; My explanation is simply that its a two sided coin - Either the man or the woman has to pay for it, and it seems to be obligatory that the man does it as a way to prove something to the woman. But in doing so, he is serving her interests to great extent but his own very little, and since dates rarely get further than a few dinners or some othersuch, its wasteful on his part.

Incidentally this has only worked four times, and its perfectly reasonable for the other person to decline, but the way i see it is that besides tradition, theres no reason it has to be the male who does the spending.
And i think the woman should have to prove she isnt just leeching off you.

Yeah i agree. The man shouldn't just be expected to pay. It's a silly tradition back when women didn't have jobs.

When me and the girl who would later be my wife started dating we solved it simply, we flipped a coin, loser paid and we took turns after that. To make sure either of us were not being cheap the who paid last time choose. So when i paid she choose and when she paid i choose.

If your going on a date with a girl who isn't willing to chance having to pay, well she probably is just using you as a meal ticket.

My friend wants me to say that if she suggests that you pay for dinner and she serves you dessert at her place she probably has an STD and to run away...

 

[TaylorPaige09]

That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

Funny thing is, if you haven't paid for anything or been put in a situation like this, then why even bother worrying about it? I would prefer seeing a movie or getting a quick bite to eat and hanging out for a first date than being in some stuffy, uptight environment in a formal setting. In either case, I would always offer to pay for half. And if he pays for it one time, then the next time I would pay for it, and so on.

EDIT:

Yeah i agree. The man shouldn't just be expected to pay. It's a silly tradition back when women didn't have jobs.

When me and the girl who would later be my wife started dating we solved it simply, we flipped a coin, loser paid and we took turns after that. To make sure either of us were not being cheap the who paid last time choose. So when i paid she choose and when she paid i choose.

Yeah, what they said.^

 

[TheTaco007]

*facepalm*

You're doing it wrong.

 

[FallenJellyDoughnut]

You are made of fail. Relationships make you feel good, surely you must have or had at least one friend at one point, notice how you feel good when hanging out with them? Now take that, but make it %50 better and %50 more intimate and you've got a relationship. Not everyone's goal is to initiate the horizontal monster mash you know.

 

[Fraeir]

First off, I've never had a girlfriend. Second, I've never been with someone on a closer level than "good friend". So I don't know what kissing, cuddling, sex, etc. is all like.

However, I don't get the idea of "dating", hell, I even hate the very word. I'd want a girlfriend that already was a friend of mine beforehand so I don't need to get in that awkward, fake "get-to-know-each-other" phase thing.
Furthermore, I may sound very cheap and boring to some people, but eating gourmet food in a fancy restaurant doesn't sound to me half as romantic as a nice, quiet evening in a living room with a good movie and popcorn.
I find cashing out big-time says "You're trying too hard".

But then again, I'm a single, lonely virgin, what do I know, right?

 

[tehweave]

I see 'dating' as more than just "go out to eat, go out to movie, go out to PLACE" I see dating as a sort of 'beginning' for relationships. Frankly, to say I'm 'dating' someone and to say I'm 'in a relationship' feel as though they're interchangeable. Maybe that's just me.

 

[Icehearted]

"I don't believe in romance because I'm about as emotional as a Vulcan."

Spoiler: wait, wut?

Also, I have two words for you friend, Pon Farr.

OT:I'm a cynical old bastard, but even I believe that love exists. It's not the idealized bull we see in movies, at least not in American culture, but I believe that it's out there for a scant few. Lust? Oh so much of that, but a relationship built on lust is like a house built on mud. I won't bother finishing this simile, you're all smart enough to do that much for yourselves

 

[Paksenarrion]

My idea of a date is just spending time with each other; money does not have to be spent on a date. A date could be as simple as passing notes to each other during class (I met my love in college, so we'd pass each other sweet nothings all the time; mine consisted of "I LOVE YOU. I SENT YOU THIS CUTE NOTE. PRETEND WE ARE IN HIGH SCHOOL."), or leaving each other notes in your lockers (he didn't have a locker in college, so I just slipped my note under his dorm room door; I decided to be creative by cutting out letters from different magazines and pasting it onto the note so that it read like one of those confession letters I often read about in shoujo manga: "MeEt mE BeHInD tHe nATUraL sCIencES bUilDInG. i'Ll bE wAItiNG.").

You don't have to spend money on a date, you just have to be romantically creative, like I am. ^_^

 

[Z of the Na'vi]

Nope. I haven't had a girlfriend since 8th grade.

And I am happy.

 

[Blackjack 222]

Most girls i date the date consists of a cheap meal, a movie and a walk(I am a VERY strange man)
Last girl i dated was an Engineer(I'm truly insane the eyes of my friends for repeatedly dating women smarter than me) and like every girl(but 2 that I've dated) she payed for her share of the meal(i payed a good deal of hers but she made me regret it)
Again, one weird dude

 

[BonsaiK]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

Not when I can just spend a little on the occasional "fling" with a more "open" woman (i.e. prostitutes). At least the prostitute or the one-night stand or whatever is more up front and honest about it.

I was just curious as to ya'lls take on the whole dating thing?

It shows that you've never been on a date before. I've been on several dates with many, many women, of varying degress of age, background and attractiveness, and not once has the woman expected that I pay for the meal.

It's standard practice for the modern woman to pay her own way on a dinner date. Why? Because she doesn't want to feel like she owes you anything at the end of the night. Women mostly aren't naive, they know why guys buy them drinks. They dislike feeling as if pressure is on them to provide sexual favours just because you spent money on a date, as much as you dislike spending that money for a perhaps-maybe-not-for-sure sexual encounter. Therefore most women these days are more than happy to pay for their own meals and drinks, it's a small price to pay for the absence of pressure.

 

[Lizmichi]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

Not when I can just spend a little on the occasional "fling" with a more "open" woman (i.e. prostitutes). At least the prostitute or the one-night stand or whatever is more up front and honest about it.

I was just curious as to ya'lls take on the whole dating thing?

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

Though I wouldn't mind having a bit of fun with a decent hooker or two.

OMG I'M SO SEXIST!

I haven't dated for a while now but my last relationship was an engagement. .... what the hell is your issue with girls being over weight? If they have a good personality that should be what matters. Dating isn't about sex at all. It's about being committed to someone and getting to know someone better. I hated it when my ex paid for everything. I have my own money thank you and I can spent it. You're not going to find anyone if all you look at is the outside.

 

[Blackjack 222]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

Not when I can just spend a little on the occasional "fling" with a more "open" woman (i.e. prostitutes). At least the prostitute or the one-night stand or whatever is more up front and honest about it.

I was just curious as to ya'lls take on the whole dating thing?

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

Though I wouldn't mind having a bit of fun with a decent hooker or two.

OMG I'M SO SEXIST!

I haven't dated for a while now but my last relationship was an engagement. .... what the hell is your issue with girls being over weight? If they have a good personality that should be what matters. Dating isn't about sex at all. It's about being committed to someone and getting to know someone better. I hated it when my ex paid for everything. I have my own money thank you and I can spent it. You're not going to find anyone if all you look at is the outside.

I hope by horribly over weight he means the size of a truck otherwise he needs to quit being an ass.
Also, get better girls by doing 3 things
1) Not being a dick
2)Not thinking with your dick
3) respect(if you don't believe it oh well just sayin).

 

[Lizmichi]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

Not when I can just spend a little on the occasional "fling" with a more "open" woman (i.e. prostitutes). At least the prostitute or the one-night stand or whatever is more up front and honest about it.

I was just curious as to ya'lls take on the whole dating thing?

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

Though I wouldn't mind having a bit of fun with a decent hooker or two.

OMG I'M SO SEXIST!

I haven't dated for a while now but my last relationship was an engagement. .... what the hell is your issue with girls being over weight? If they have a good personality that should be what matters. Dating isn't about sex at all. It's about being committed to someone and getting to know someone better. I hated it when my ex paid for everything. I have my own money thank you and I can spent it. You're not going to find anyone if all you look at is the outside.

I hope by horribly over weight he means the size of a truck otherwise he needs to quit being an ass

Agreed. Shit like that is the reason why girls throw up or just don't eat. That's shallow as hell if that's what he means.

 

[I Max95]

i know i dont need it
ill continue to meet new people
if i by coincidence meet someone i like who is the oposite sex
id date them
but im not activly seeking them out

 

[s0denone]

I've never understood the whole "dating" thing. That is, I've never understood why I should shell out a ton of my hard-earned cash to provide several meals for some spoiled/pampered female just for a "chance" of getting to dive into her nether regions.

Not when I can just spend a little on the occasional "fling" with a more "open" woman (i.e. prostitutes). At least the prostitute or the one-night stand or whatever is more up front and honest about it.

I was just curious as to ya'lls take on the whole dating thing?

And before anyone tries to bring it up - NO! I have never been on a "real" or "formal" date, I have never paid for some female acquaintances meal ticket, and I've never had a girlfriend on account of pretty much all the women I come across are either A) pampered beyond repair B) in possession of a "great personality" but horribly overweight or C) is already in possesion of a child or to old to even really consider (A woman who is almost old enough to be my mom does not interest me. Sorry mom.)

Though I wouldn't mind having a bit of fun with a decent hooker or two.

OMG I'M SO SEXIST!

I haven't dated for a while now but my last relationship was an engagement. .... what the hell is your issue with girls being over weight? If they have a good personality that should be what matters. Dating isn't about sex at all. It's about being committed to someone and getting to know someone better. I hated it when my ex paid for everything. I have my own money thank you and I can spent it. You're not going to find anyone if all you look at is the outside.

I hope by horribly over weight he means the size of a truck otherwise he needs to quit being an ass

Agreed. Shit like that is the reason why girls throw up or just don't eat. That's shallow as hell if that's what he means.

Yeah. Girls don't do that at all They only care about personality, and will happily date you if you're 200 pounds overweight. Seems about right.
I know you didn't say it applied to the other side as well, but that had to be said.
Let the man be who he is. Basic attraction is sexual. That is normal. You think "She's hot, I'd fuck her" or you don't. If you claim you're not affected by looks, then you're not just lying this board, but to yourself.

OT:
I've been on a few "dates". You make it sound very formal. A few of the "formal" ones. I insist on paying. Hell, I'm oldfashioned and such. I expect the woman to fork out by spreading her legs later.

 

[The Grim Ace]

Dates really depend on who you're dating. Most of the girls I've dated are rather mellow and laid back like I am so they didn't need to really be that pampered or spoiled. As for the sex, look, it's great but it's not the reason why you date someone, dating is for more long term relationships, sex can be found in much less complex and free ways.

 

[Yureina]

Nope. Dates just don't seem very special to me, and I am already on record as a hater of "tradition" and the old ways of doing things. I might appreciate this sort of stuff in the future, but for now I see little value in dates. Its too "official" for me, which only makes things worse or uncomfortable.