Poll: Gender Identity

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Jadak

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MarsAtlas said:
Jadak said:
Exactly, and if cis is just a way of saying 'they match', then it's not worth using. Things match unless otherwise specified.
And for the record, picking "they match" as a default in regards to gender congruence is like picking "white" as the default race. You're implicating extra legitimacy for cisgender people when you say that it should go without mentioning.
And why wouldn't I do that? Picking 'white' as the default is obviously out of place, as it has no relevance to the 'default settings' of the species.

Can the same be said of gender? I'm all for trying to be supportive of people that don't fit the standard, but having a mind that does not match your body is an error. Not discriminating again such people is one thing, but are we really supposed to pretend that it's perfectly normal and nothing went wrong?

When you order a new computer and it comes with different parts, maybe it's not necessarily bad, maybe you'll even accept it. Hell, maybe it's even better than you expected, but it most definitely is not what you ordered, and you're not going to deny that there was a mistake just because the result is still okay.

So yes, I am implicating extra legitimacy for 'cisgender people', because why shouldn't there be? I get that people want to avoid (or pretend to not have) a biased and discriminatory culture, but while things like sexual preference can be debated, having a mind that does not match your body is most definitely a fuckup at the factory, and forcing a bunch of accommodating terminology isn't going to change that.
 

Lieju

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Vault101 said:
Lieju said:
I generally go by 'female', but 'genderqueer' is probably closer to truth.
It's difficult for me to tell if I'd have turned out this way even without the surrounding society telling me all the time I wasn't being a 'proper' female, (being good at math, liking dinosaurs, not wanting to wear dresses or makeup, being attracted to girls) or if I could feel fully female if those pressures didn't exist.
.

To be honest I'd prefer if I was neither, but I feel like I wouldn't have any more of an issue if my body was male (and I get confused for a guy every now and then.) but obviously I can't tell for sure.
what does "genderqueer" mean? like is it different to being trans?
Genderqueer = not male or female.
Transpeople feel they're either male or female, and the problem is that the body doesn't match.


I did suspect growing up and during my teenage years I was trans, but since I figured I didn't want to really be male either, I just sort of tried to ignore it.
It's not a huge problem for me, but I do have some issues with my body. I don't have much of a bust, but I'd prefer I had no breasts, and I'm pretty sure I'd go insane if I got pregnant because no.

I guess I'd prefer being a female that doesn't look like one or have female body?

Dunno, I generally just answer 'female' in things like these, even if it's somewhat more complicated.

chadachada123 said:
(Side note, I truly think that anyone that doesn't answer among the first four options is either lying, delusional, or thinks of themselves as some sort of special snowflake that may or may not be seeking attention)

Edit: I forgot to include "Has a legitimate mental illness," which is fine, so long as they recognize it, as with all mental illnesses that are recognizable and hopefully treatable, like Dissociative Identity Disorder.
And there's the reason I don't generally bring it up.
 

anthony87

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Zhukov said:
Padwolf said:
I was also told I'm "not a real girl" because I wax instead of shaving. Possibly the dumbest thing I've ever heard, but there you go.
Umm...

Seriously?

I mean, that'd be like someone telling me I'm "not a real man" for shaving my face with disposable razors instead of the ones where you change out the blades.
Tut tut....


And you call yourself a man!
 

Lieju

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Nimcha said:
Ugh, I object to the 'cis' label. I've noticed several trans people using it as a derogatory term. Not constructive at all.
I've seen a lot of people using 'gay' as a derogatory term. Should I object to that label being used to describe homosexuals?

And less so, but I have seen cispeople use the word 'trans' in a derogatory manner, so let's be offended at that too.
 

Zhukov

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Dec 29, 2009
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Zachary Amaranth said:
Zhukov said:
I did shave with a really sharp pocket knife once though. That's gotta net me a few manly points, right? Right?
...How big was the knife?
Well, it was a pocket knife, so maybe a 3 inc...

Oh, huge! Huuuuge I tell you. Like, a foot and a half at least.
 

Nimcha

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thaluikhain said:
Nimcha said:
Ugh, I object to the 'cis' label.
What label would you prefer to have, then?
I refer to myself as 'female'. I do not feel the need to specifically state I am not trans. I feel the cis label is counter-productive since it only further devides the people who do itendify as trans from the rest of the world.

A friend of mine identifies as female too, and only discloses the fact or her being transitioned to people she chooses herself. I do not feel there is inherently any difference between my gender identity and hers, so that is why I do not want to identify as 'cis'.
 

Nimcha

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Lieju said:
Nimcha said:
Ugh, I object to the 'cis' label. I've noticed several trans people using it as a derogatory term. Not constructive at all.
I've seen a lot of people using 'gay' as a derogatory term. Should I object to that label being used to describe homosexuals?

And less so, but I have seen cispeople use the word 'trans' in a derogatory manner, so let's be offended at that too.
I fear you missed my point. I know all about the derogatory meaning of 'gay' since I'm gay myself. The 'cis' label is not productive for reasonable discussion since it is only serves to devide. For further explanation, see my post above.
 

Blow_Pop

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Jan 21, 2009
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Genderfluid.

Basically means that mine fluctuates depending on the day and how I'm feeling that day. Dysphoria tends to be almost a daily issue I deal with. And misgendering up the ass. Unfortunately I don't have the energy most days to correct people
 

DarkRawen

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Nimcha said:
thaluikhain said:
Nimcha said:
Ugh, I object to the 'cis' label.
What label would you prefer to have, then?
I refer to myself as 'female'. I do not feel the need to specifically state I am not trans. I feel the cis label is counter-productive since it only further devides the people who do itendify as trans from the rest of the world.

A friend of mine identifies as female too, and only discloses the fact or her being transitioned to people she chooses herself. I do not feel there is inherently any difference between my gender identity and hers, so that is why I do not want to identify as 'cis'.
Just quoting you to say that I agree with your opinion on the 'cis' label. In most cases it seems unnecessary.


OT: Maaan, at least you have a trans dude on the poll now, though my vote is awfully lonely :p.
 

Something Amyss

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Lieju said:
I did suspect growing up and during my teenage years I was trans, but since I figured I didn't want to really be male either, I just sort of tried to ignore it.
It's not a huge problem for me, but I do have some issues with my body. I don't have much of a bust, but I'd prefer I had no breasts, and I'm pretty sure I'd go insane if I got pregnant because no.

I guess I'd prefer being a female that doesn't look like one or have female body?
My last four "girlfriends"[footnote]the use of quotes is due to the very nature of the concept, not as a slur or in a derogatory sense[/footnote] have all had some variation on this theme. And it doesn't really matter to me in terms of being with them, it has certainly challenged my notion of my own sexuality.

Not that that matters beyond sort of an intellectual assessment in the first place. It's just...I don't know, interesting,m for lack of a better word?

Zhukov said:
Well, it was a pocket knife, so maybe a 3 inc...

Oh, huge! Huuuuge I tell you. Like, a foot and a half at least.
Well, I think we can give you some credit.
 

Something Amyss

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Nimcha said:
The 'cis' label is not productive for reasonable discussion since it is only serves to devide.
Then why identify yourself as "gay," as it only serves to divide?
 

Eamar

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Hixy said:
I dont want to seem like I am personally attacking anyone so I wont quote but some of these comments smack of people who see them selfs on the fringes of society and believe if we were all the same they might fit in more.
It's pretty obvious you're referring to my comment about "my ideal future", so it's kinda pointless trying to be cryptic about it. In future please do just quote, I promise I won't bite.

I really don't see myself as "on the fringes of society" though, so I'm going to have to burst that bubble. There are things that place me slightly outside the norm, whatever that is, I guess (bisexuality, mental illness, tendency to dress oddly), but at the end of the day I am a white, cisgender, upper-middle class Brit at a prestigious university. I am very much part of the status quo and "the system" has benefited me, no point in denying it. It's never really a good idea to dismiss people based on assumptions you've made without any supporting evidence.

Extreme example that it is, the next world war roles around and the men will be out fighting and the women will be picking up the slack.
Yeah, no. Just look at how women's military roles are changing already (around the world, not just in the US). Look how much they've changed since the last world war. If another global war does break out, it would make much more sense for the people who are most physically suited to be out fighting while those who are unsuited would be at home picking up the slack. And I'm pretty sure militaries wouldn't be turning away volunteers based purely on gender. It may well be that more men would be fighting than women, but gender alone isn't what would be making the difference.

You live in a society that is rich with resources where people can afford to have choice which is why you can even have this discussion about gender roles and that will continue as long as society can afford it.
Gee, I hadn't noticed.

/sarcasm

Again, I think you'll find if we reverted to a less advanced, basic survival state it'd be people who were most suited to each task who'd be doing it, and that wouldn't necessarily always fall along gender lines. History is littered with poor/peasant women (and children) labouring in the fields etc, not to mention peasant men taking care of infants if they were the ones who happened to be around. Traditionally, it's actually been the rich who could afford to construct elaborate gender roles. Most people just had to muck in and help with whatever needed doing.

There is nothing old fashioned or unenlightened about men wanting to behave like men and women like women.
Never said there was. You'll note that my ideal future was one in which everyone was free to act and present themselves as they chose. That includes men "behaving like men" and women "behaving like women" just as much as it includes everything in between. It's just that there would be no pressure or expectation placed on any individual. Does that really sound so bad?

Thats the vast majority of society.
What "the vast majority of society" thinks is prone to change over time. Just look at how much attitudes to some social issues have come on in the last generation or two.

Also, just because the vast majority goes along with something doesn't mean they're happy with it or would have chosen it for themselves if they'd been presented with other options.
 

Nimcha

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Zachary Amaranth said:
Nimcha said:
The 'cis' label is not productive for reasonable discussion since it is only serves to devide.
Then why identify yourself as "gay," as it only serves to divide?
That's... completely different. First, sexuality is independent of gender. I am first and foremost female. Second, people should be free to choose their own label. If someone identifies as female or male or intersex or whatever, I will respect that. Just the same, if I choose not to accept a certain lable because I have objections, that should be respected too.
 

The Lunatic

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I am a "Guy".

In terms of gender "Identity" to call yourself "Cis" or "Trans" is a bit odd.

Surely the point of being "Trans" is that you identify as the other gender and thus are "A guy" and not "A trans guy".
 

Erttheking

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chadachada123 said:
(Side note, I truly think that anyone that doesn't answer among the first four options is either lying, delusional, or thinks of themselves as some sort of special snowflake that may or may not be seeking attention)

Edit: I forgot to include "Has a legitimate mental illness," which is fine, so long as they recognize it, as with all mental illnesses that are recognizable and hopefully treatable, like Dissociative Identity Disorder.
http://www.twonkhammer.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Implied-Facepalm.jpg

I'm guessing that you've never heard of Gender Fluid? IE, you don't know what gender you identify as? You kinda flip back and forth between the two? I know one, currently identifies as male but overall tries to make his appearance and name as gender neutral as possible. He does not have a mental illness. Please refrain from such insults.
 

zerragonoss

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Hixy said:
There is nothing wrong with having a difference between men and women, there are differences in how we think and act based on our biology. Men and women are not identical no matter how much you want it to be like that. And I dont see what the problem is there.

Extreme example that it is, the next world war roles around and the men will be out fighting and the women will be picking up the slack. You live in a society that is rich with resources where people can afford to have choice which is why you can even have this discussion about gender roles and that will continue as long as society can afford it.

I dont see what the fascination people have here is with an androgynous utopian future. That sounds pretty weird to me. I dont want to seem like I am personally attacking anyone so I wont quote but some of these comments smack of people who see them selfs on the fringes of society and believe if we were all the same they might fit in more. There is nothing old fashioned or unenlightened about men wanting to behave like men and women like women. Thats the vast majority of society.
Because its wrong even with a ridiculous amount of natural bias. Allow me to elaborate by looking at a theoretical. Lets start by saying their are as they a ten traits that are that flip male or female and all of them make you ten percent more male or more female. So if somebody has traits 1-9 females they are 90% female, or if they have trait say 8 and 3 female and the rest male they are 80% male. Ok now we add in an a fairly extreme gender essentialist assumption That 90% of people are 80-100% the same gender as their sex, so 90% of men have 8-10 of the male traits.

Ok, now that we have the set up lets look at the gain and loss for allowing these gender normed traits to be expected with them being true statistically to such a high degree. What we gain people can make assumptions fairly accurate about other people based on their gender. What we loss 10% of people feel like they are somewhat to extremely out of place in society and their own body. Now that seems horribly unbalanced to me you gain the ability to make or to keep some assumptions you have which may even come back to bite you when they are wrong more than they will help you when they are right, in exchange you seriously hurt a lot of people. Its possible their are more reasons to keep gender norms but I just don't see them in any form of logical argument.
 

Thaluikhain

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The Lunatic said:
I am a "Guy".

In terms of gender "Identity" to call yourself "Cis" or "Trans" is a bit odd.

Surely the point of being "Trans" is that you identify as the other gender and thus are "A guy" and not "A trans guy".
Unfortunately, society hasn't totally overlooked the differences between transgender and cisgender people yet.

Sure, once the prejudice has been forgotten, most likely that will happen soon after, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
 

The Lunatic

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thaluikhain said:
Unfortunately, society hasn't totally overlooked the differences between transgender and cisgender people yet.

Sure, once the prejudice has been forgotten, most likely that will happen soon after, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
That's definitely true. And most people will go by what gender you most look like from an outside and uninformed perspective. And most of the time with most people, they will be correct.

However, on the internet. There's no physical presence, you can be pretty much whatever you want on the internet. So, I don't see the reason for it on an internet forum. I suppose.
 

Thaluikhain

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The Lunatic said:
thaluikhain said:
Unfortunately, society hasn't totally overlooked the differences between transgender and cisgender people yet.

Sure, once the prejudice has been forgotten, most likely that will happen soon after, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
That's definitely true. And most people will go by what gender you most look like from an outside and uninformed perspective. And most of the time with most people, they will be correct.

However, on the internet. There's no physical presence, you can be pretty much whatever you want on the internet. So, I don't see the reason for it on an internet forum. I suppose.
Statistical reasons?

We used to have a number of threads about where people were from, with a helpful list of places to choose from along the lines of

North America
US
Canada
Europe
United Kingdom
Scotland
Switzerland
Other

I'd say that those polls got a lot of complaining about the choices involved, but then we've gotten some in this thread anyway.
 

The Lunatic

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thaluikhain said:
Statistical reasons?

We used to have a number of threads about where people were from, with a helpful list of places to choose from along the lines of

North America
US
Canada
Europe
United Kingdom
Scotland
Switzerland
Other

I'd say that those polls got a lot of complaining about the choices involved, but then we've gotten some in this thread anyway.
Which is fine!

However, the topic at hand is "Identity" which I find isn't the same as "What is your technical gender".