Poll: Is Not Dating a Certain Race Racist?

[ThreeName]

Only if you're not doing it based on prejudice or stereotypes rather than physical differences (i.e. tastes).

 

[Playful Pony]

Well uh... I wouldn't call myself sexist for not dating men, so I don't see why not dating someone of a particular race makes you racist. I happen to like women of all colors though =p.

 

[Thaluikhain]

It most certainly is racist... but it's also benign racism.

Just how straight people are sexist... but it's also benign sexism.

Just how homosexuals are sexist... but it's also benign sexism.

Nobody is entitled to your romantic affections for whatever reason. You can romantically pursue who you want for whatever reasons you want.

But I answered "No" on the poll because I get the feeling it's asking if there's something morally wrong about it or not, not if it lives up to the literal definition of racism (which it does).

Not saying I disagree with your point, but "benign" in the context of sexism/racism and the like has a different meaning, that you are oppressing them on the justification it's for their own good.

 

[Smiley Face]

No. It's not racist. Unless preference in the looks of your mate is somehow discriminatory now. Hasn't been for thousands of years at least.

Yes it IS. Choosing or not choosing SOLELY because of RACE is the very definition of RACISM.
It's just that maybe it doesn't matter that much. He can date whoever he wants. Primitive way to go about it, but hey, it's his private life.

I'm inclined to disagree with you there - race is not the primary motivating factor in the choice. If a person finds the certain physical characteristics typical of a certain ethnic group to be more or less appealing than those of another, I would argue that it isn't quite racism, because the race is incidental to his choice - he's making the choice based on physical characteristics. Yes, those characteristics are informed by race, but that's irrelevant - the decision isn't being made solely based on race, it's being made solely based on physical characteristics. Of course, an appropriate test case would be to imagine a hypothetical scenario in which there was a member of said ethnic group who didn't have any of the physical characteristics typical of said group - if the decision isn't altered by that fact, then it's actually racism hiding behind an excuse; if not, it really is just preference for certain physical characteristics.

Personally, there are some physical characteristics I find unappealing that are typical to certain groups, but they're not universal traits, so I don't have universal rules based on race that affect my attraction to someone, even if on average, I find certain ones to be more or less likely to be attractive to me. Frankly, I don't think about it too much - I've got a pretty diverse pool of friends, and none of them seem to care either.

 

[The_Echo]

No. It's not racist. Unless preference in the looks of your mate is somehow discriminatory now. Hasn't been for thousands of years at least.

Yes it IS. Choosing or not choosing SOLELY because of RACE is the very definition of RACISM.

I'm inclined to disagree.

See, I'm a man who quite frankly doesn't find dark skin to be attractive. I have nothing against any race that might have dark skin (or those who tan themselves to attain darker skin), it's just that I don't find them quite as attractive and therefore am less likely to feel inclined to date them.

And I don't think that's racist, though it means I probably wouldn't date people of certain races.

 

[Mobax]

To anyone who says they would not date someone from -blank- race. And that's all they say, just a blanket statement, yes that's racist. Basically to blanket an entire race and say I would never date anyone from that race, it's racist, or at best extremely ignorant.

Obviously physical attraction is an important part of dating, and everyone has a different concept of beauty. And race is a physical characteristic of people, so that can certainly play a role in who you find attractive. For myself, I generally find dark haired women more attractive, that doesn't mean I hate blondes, or would refuse to date a blonde. I've seen many attractive blonde women. Also, I generally don't find myself attracted to most Asian women, but again, I've seen more then a few attractive Asian women.

My point is, to make a blank generic statement shows a real lack of thought. A person may think they don't find black women attractive, but if they use that thought to blanket out all black women, that is a real shame. They might miss meeting a really special person, because they blinded themselves through ignorance, and that is what racism is isn't it? Blinded by ignorance?

 

[Mersadeon]

I'm saying no. You are free to have any preference - if someones preference is not dating blonds like in your example, then nobody bats an eye. Sure it's shallow, but one has every right to be shallow.

As long as you don't say you don't want to date them because there is something wrong with people from that "race".

 

[Kristian Fischer]

This is another example of a word that's gotten inflated out of all proportion because of the Internet and lack of education. Racism, hate, love...

Racism means being convinced of one race's inherent superiority over others. Doesn't necessarily have anything to do with dating.

 

[Rblade]

if the fact that she is of a certain race then yes. Which also includes "I don't date black women because they all "

but there is no arguing sexual attraction. I'm pretty sure that in general people tend to be more attracted to people that look more like them, thats just nature

 

[Thaluikhain]

See, I'm a man who quite frankly doesn't find dark skin to be attractive. I have nothing against any race that might have dark skin (or those who tan themselves to attain darker skin), it's just that I don't find them quite as attractive and therefore am less likely to feel inclined to date them.

And I don't think that's racist, though it means I probably wouldn't date people of certain races.

Yes and no. In theory there's nothing racist about that.

However, there is a long established cultural beauty standard that prizes fair skin, hair that is straight and blonde and so on. These are things associated with a certain ethnic group, and this isn't a coincidence. A white dominated society has defined beauty in terms of being white.

That is not to say that were that not the case, you wouldn't have some people feeling that way, but it certainly is an influence.

 

[Abomination]

It most certainly is racist... but it's also benign racism.

Just how straight people are sexist... but it's also benign sexism.

Just how homosexuals are sexist... but it's also benign sexism.

Nobody is entitled to your romantic affections for whatever reason. You can romantically pursue who you want for whatever reasons you want.

But I answered "No" on the poll because I get the feeling it's asking if there's something morally wrong about it or not, not if it lives up to the literal definition of racism (which it does).

Not saying I disagree with your point, but "benign" in the context of sexism/racism and the like has a different meaning, that you are oppressing them on the justification it's for their own good.

That sounds more like a case of the misappropriation of the word benign than a literal use of the word - which would mean something that's harmless, despite appearances.

And on the flip side I guess it also means what it implies - if not dating someone is "oppression" then it is for their own good if the other party doesn't find them attractive

 

[Nokturos]

It's racist in the same way that not wanting to date a man makes me a homophobe.

 

[Phrozenflame500]

Not if you don't find them attractive.

Saying that not dating a certain race is racist is like saying not dating men if you're a man (or women if you're a woman) is homophobic.

 

[Caiphus]

The problem with these arguments is that there is a biological component to attraction based on sex. There is no biological component to attraction based on race. It's not sexism to find one sex more sexually appealing than another because it's not a conscious decision. A straight person can't will themselves to find their sex attractive, a gay person can't will themselves to find the opposite sex attractive, bisexuals can't will themselves to only find one sex attractive, and asexuals can't will themselves to find anyone attractive. It's biology. It's not learned.

Associating certain races with sexual attractiveness is learned. There is no biological component of the body that says, "Black people are hot!" There's no hormone desitocin that makes seeing Indian people cause the body to go all weak-kneed. There's no caucanoid fold in the brain that produces thoughts of "pasty and pale, never fail!" Attraction or dis-attration to particular races as opposed to attractive people in general is a learned behavior. Which is why the reasons it was learned matter. So these comparisons between race and sex just plain don't work.

Not arguing or anything, but I was under the impression that sexual orientation was at least partly learned or brought about by one's environment?

I swear I've seen people post on this forum, although there's every chance that they were mistaken, that humans are meant/designed/inclined/something to be more bisexual than actual societal levels of bisexuality would suggest.

Edit: Although maybe there's a difference between people oppressing their sexual orientation and people learning to favour a certain skin/hair colour.
Answers on a postcard.

 

[Thaluikhain]

It most certainly is racist... but it's also benign racism.

Just how straight people are sexist... but it's also benign sexism.

Just how homosexuals are sexist... but it's also benign sexism.

Nobody is entitled to your romantic affections for whatever reason. You can romantically pursue who you want for whatever reasons you want.

But I answered "No" on the poll because I get the feeling it's asking if there's something morally wrong about it or not, not if it lives up to the literal definition of racism (which it does).

Not saying I disagree with your point, but "benign" in the context of sexism/racism and the like has a different meaning, that you are oppressing them on the justification it's for their own good.

That sounds more like a case of the misappropriation of the word benign than a literal use of the word - which would mean something that's harmless, despite appearances.

Well, "benign" should probably be in quotes, as it's only nominally benign, and the phrase is very unclear, yeah, but that's the phrasing which has come into existence.

As an aside, though, "benign" shouldn't mean harmless, it should mean something good. Still the opposite of malign, but in different ways.

 

[JediMB]

I don't believe in race. I find the very notion of human sub-races to be racist.

That said, I personally find certain nose shapes unattractive (including my own!), but I don't really associate those with any particular "races", and I think I'd be pretty damn shallow if I rejected an otherwise attractive (physically or otherwise) person for the shape of her nose.

Or maybe I'm completely wrong. I don't know. Either way, I voted "yes" in the poll.

 

[Caiphus]

Well, "benign" should probably be in quotes, as it's only nominally benign, and the phrase is very unclear, yeah, but that's the phrasing which has come into existence.

As an aside, though, "benign" shouldn't mean harmless, it should mean something good. Still the opposite of malign, but in different ways.

Also not meant to argue here, but when people refer to "benign" tumours they generally mean that the tumours are harmless/unlikely to spread, and not that they're actually any good. As opposed to malignant tumours, which are definitely bad.

But whatever, this is rather off-topic. And semantics are always awesome forum debates.

 

[Blood Brain Barrier]

I don't believe in race. I find the very notion of human sub-races to be racist.

It is. That's the point. How can you not believe in race though? Black skin is black. White skin is white. And like reproduces like. We classify sub-species of plant by color of their flowers or slightly differing leaf shape, so why not the same principle with people?

 

[Casual Shinji]

I suppose it is, but eh, tough shit.

What you're attracted to is what you're attracted to.

I mean, I find women from India generally more beautiful than white women, so I guess that makes me racist toward my own race.

 

[SonOfVoorhees]

No its preference. If you find say black woman or Chinese woman unattractive - that thats you choice. Doesnt mean you hate their race, cant be friends or interact with them in anyway. Also doesnt mean a black or chinese woman wont appear in the future and totally make you fall head or heels in love with them. You can only fall for the person you fall for.