Poll: Is treating women in Gentlemanly way Sexist?

[Timmey]

My bad, I guess I associate being called a sexist as opposing women's rights and the like. I think we just disagree, I understand that it comes under 'sexist' because its different treatment of men and women, but I don't think it has negative connotations.

Raises flame shield

And sometimes a women might need a and carrying heavy stuff, I by no means claim women are weak or inferior, simply that I am stronger than most women and I don't see how it is a problem if I offer to carry something heavy for them.

A sexist is someone who treats either men or woman differently than their counterparts simply because of what reproductive organs they have. End of story. You can sugarcoat it however you want. You can justify it however you want. It is sexism and it makes you a sexist. Own up to that fact and move on.

Hypothetical situation. You come across a woman strugglin to carry several bags. You do not know this person at all. Do you offer to help carry the stuff?

Now the important part.

You come across the same exact situation except instead of a woman it is a man strugglin to carry several bags. Do you offer to help carry the stuff?

Yeah I would do it for both but quite simply you would find more women struggling to carry heavy stuff than men, because men are stronger.

 

[Random Fella]

It's that some women like to be treated nicely, they enjoy to be treated like queens,

And there isn't even a single man who likes to be treated nicely?

Of course, it should be a two way street, but the way a man and a women are nice to each other should be different
As men like to be treated differently to women

 

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

Depends on the intent and the way you would also treat men.

If you treat women with more respect than men simply based on the fact that they are women, then you are heading into sexist territory. If you respect individual women more because they are strong confident individuals then that's entirely different, and if you treat everyone with respect and dignity then it's blanket manners and gentlemenly conduct, not sexism.

 

[Dense_Electric]

Not as long as you treat men with the same respect, and expect the same from women.

 

[Maze1125]

And sometimes a women might need a and carrying heavy stuff, I by no means claim women are weak or inferior, simply that I am stronger than most women and I don't see how it is a problem if I offer to carry something heavy for them.

And it wouldn't be sexist, if you're also willing to help carry things for weaker men.

If you refuse to carry things for men who are weaker than you, but do for women who are weaker than you. You're perpetuating a stereotype that men ought to be strong, but it's okay for women to be weak, and that's sexist.

I would happily carry anything heavy for anyone. But the way it works out is that I end up carrying more stuff for women than men.

Well, if you judge people purely on their ability, and your judgement doesn't get skewed by their gender, then that's not sexist.
Yes, women are statistically weaker than men. So someone who helped weak people, regardless of gender, would be likely to help women more than men. It's only sexist if they're doing because they are women.

 

[Maze1125]

It's that some women like to be treated nicely, they enjoy to be treated like queens,

And there isn't even a single man who likes to be treated nicely?

Of course, it should be a two way street, but the way a man and a women are nice to each other should be different
As men like to be treated differently to women

Men are not just one group all with the same tastes, and neither are women.
Some men like to have the door held for them, and some don't. Some women like to have the door held for them, and some don't.

Do you not see how horribly sexist it is to presume that just because someone is a man, that they don't want the door held for them?

 

[Timmey]

And sometimes a women might need a and carrying heavy stuff, I by no means claim women are weak or inferior, simply that I am stronger than most women and I don't see how it is a problem if I offer to carry something heavy for them.

And it wouldn't be sexist, if you're also willing to help carry things for weaker men.

If you refuse to carry things for men who are weaker than you, but do for women who are weaker than you. You're perpetuating a stereotype that men ought to be strong, but it's okay for women to be weak, and that's sexist.

I would happily carry anything heavy for anyone. But the way it works out is that I end up carrying more stuff for women than men.

Well, if you judge people purely on their ability, and your judgement doesn't get skewed by their gender, then that's not sexist.
Yes, women are statistically weaker than men. So someone who helped weak people, regardless of gender, would be likely to help women more than men. It's only sexist if they're doing because they are women.

Indeed, seems we are in agreement, a miracle on these forums I find

 

[shintakie10]

It's that some women like to be treated nicely, they enjoy to be treated like queens,

And there isn't even a single man who likes to be treated nicely?

Of course, it should be a two way street, but the way a man and a women are nice to each other should be different
As men like to be treated differently to women

Are you sure about that? I'm havin trouble thinkin of any type of compliment or courtesy that a person would give a woman that I would be offended by gettin myself. Doors bein opened for me? I'd appreciate it greatly. Chairs pulled out for me? Definitely would like that. Being complimented on my looks? Love it.

 

[ElPatron]

I voted male, no.

Because reasons. But mostly because the word "sexist" is thrown around a lot.

Example:

Yes, women are statistically weaker than men.

OH NOES HE WANTS TO KEEP WOMINZ IN TEH KITCHEN, SEXIST!!!1!!1one!11!eleven!!

 

[Random Fella]

It's that some women like to be treated nicely, they enjoy to be treated like queens,

And there isn't even a single man who likes to be treated nicely?

Of course, it should be a two way street, but the way a man and a women are nice to each other should be different
As men like to be treated differently to women

Men are not just one group all with the same tastes, and neither are women.
Some men like to have the door held for them, and some don't. Some women like to have the door held for them, and some don't.

Do you not see how horribly sexist it is to presume that just because someone is a man, that they don't want the door held for them?

I agree, it is sexist
and it's sexist that I see the man as being the one who acts like a man
and the end of that comment was also sexist
But do you really think it's wrong to expect my fellow men to respect women, and treat them like ladies
So yes, I suppose I am a sexist, but i'd say I'm a sexist in a good way, Politically Correct activists would say I'm wrong, they'd say everyone should be treated equally, but I disagree, I just can't help but feel that way

It's that some women like to be treated nicely, they enjoy to be treated like queens,

And there isn't even a single man who likes to be treated nicely?

Of course, it should be a two way street, but the way a man and a women are nice to each other should be different
As men like to be treated differently to women

Are you sure about that? I'm havin trouble thinkin of any type of compliment or courtesy that a person would give a woman that I would be offended by gettin myself. Doors bein opened for me? I'd appreciate it greatly. Chairs pulled out for me? Definitely would like that. Being complimented on my looks? Love it.

I just can't think of having a lady treat me like that, it would surely be one another standing by the door awaiting the other to walk through
So i'll just have to respond the way I responded above this text.

 

[Optional Opinion]

I would say yes, you are discriminating based on sex.

That being said, it's not a bad thing. Keep it up.

 

[getoffmycloud]

No not really there is nothing sexist about walking a girl home at night to make sure she is safe or something like that because unfortunately that's just the way the world is sometimes and I do stuff like hold doors open for everyone anyway its just polite

 

[Maze1125]

But do you really think it's wrong to expect my fellow men to respect women, and treat them like ladies

That doesn't mean anything unless you are already segregating men and women.
There is no inherent way that a "lady" is "meant" to be treated. A women is just another person, treat them as a human being, not as an arbitrarily defined "lady".

but i'd say I'm a sexist in a good way,

There's no such thing. Perpetuating stereotypes is never good in the end, and there's not a finite supply of politeness. If you're going to be nice to women, why not be nice to men too?

I just can't help but feel that way

Yes you can. It's not going to happen overnight, but it's hardly immutable.
If, on the other hand, you insist that "I can't change" that's certainly the first step to a self fulfilling prophecy.

 

[Maze1125]

Yeah, it's sexist, but most people here are sexist anyway, so why worry?

Because worrying about it is the only way to fight it.
Yes, everyone is sexist to some extent, that doesn't mean we should just give up and accept it. Just because it's true of everyone, doesn't mean it's suddenly okay.

 

[BrassButtons]

I realize this, I just don't think that it is important. Why go after this when there are far bigger fish to fry. At worst this is simply a representation of much bigger problems in society.

It was part of a larger discussion, where he was trying to claim to be fighting sexism while engaging in sexism. Claiming to be a gentleman was not the only reason I called him a sexist, just one of them.

 

[Chao_Ulv]

I'd say that it's not sexist it's just polite, I assume most people are raised to treat women with respect. Also if I had to treat both genders exactly the same shit could get pretty awkward, everytime I say a women has a nice figure I'd have to say that her male friend also had a nice figure. Letting the door slam in a women's face because you think holding it open is sexist would be rude. I hold the door open for everyone be they male or female, ugly or smokin' hot, because I'm polite oh and because I think women are too weak to open the heavy door.

It is certainly sexist when your idea of politeness and respect involves discriminating against people.

ummm what?why is being polite to a woman sexist here, and how is being nice to women sexist.

Because doing it exclusively to women for no reason other than their gender is sexist. Not a hard concept, is it?

i kiss woman, but am i sexist for not kissing guys?

You seem to have confused politeness for sexual interest. Or do you think they're one and the same? I hope not.

women and men are two diffrent genders, and will be treated diffrently by others in diffrent social situations.

Yes, amazing. That doesn't mean it isn't sexist. Since when has "It happens" been proof something isn't sexist?

to say holding a door or offering a coat only to a woman is like saying me only going out with women and turning down gay guys is sexist

No, it isn't. Sexual interest is a different matter than politeness.

1. nope, havent confused anything.
2. nope still not sexist sexist is discrimination, discrimination is unjust or prejudicial treatment based on sex, race, or sexual orientation. i dont think being a gentleman is being unjust or prejudicial, therefore you are incorrect as far as i am concerned. if your going to further argue that your wrong subtly, please learn what sexist, then discrimination means. and the above sexual interest was an example, not to be taken to a literal point. :/