Poll: Is young love a thing?

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UnknownGunslinger

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SeeIn2D said:
Just curious what people on this site think of younger people who say they are in love. I don't just mean the "Goodnight I love you" thing, I mean two people being legitimately in love at a young age. I'm bringing this up because I called my girlfriend today and we were talking and we basically were talking about whether or not we are actually in love, or if it was just our young age making us think we are. (I know weird conversation to be having) But basically what we concluded that two younger people in their teens can actually be in love, just it was rarer because at that age most teenagers are driven by hormones and a want for sex.
So escapists, what do you think?
Click here: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-bits-advice-that-dont-make-sense-until-its-too-late/
Read number 5.
Come back to me :)

I'm not saying you're not in love, or you can't be in love because you're too young!
You and you alone know what you're actually feeling, and I've seen a lot of examples of high-school couples staying together for years, and genuinely being in love with each other.
But I've been in love at that age, and I know from experience it's mostly driven by the newness of things and them hormones :)
 

Girl With One Eye

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I think they can, because some people end up marrying their "childhood sweetheart". But majority of relationships with people that age, end up in heartbreak. I think everyone has to go through a few really bad relationships to realise when they have the real thing.
 

SckizoBoy

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TheTim said:
I've dated my girlfriend for 5 years and im seventeen. and we've only had 2 or 3 minor fights and not a single major one.


I can safely say that we are in love.
I'd agree... but wait until you have that first major argument and then come back. When you're still together (and not reluctantly) after that, that's when you really know you're in love.

Believe me, I've been there.

Yopaz said:
Young love is a bunch of hormones and chemicals giving various signals to affect your body and mind.

Adult love is a bunch of hormones and chemicals giving various signals to affect your body and mind.
True, but young love also involves the lack of comprehension of the effects of said hormones and chemicals. So adult love brings a certain cynicism with it... *shrug*

OT: I've always felt that being truly in love is nothing to do with how you are as a couple when things are going well and you're both happy. Instead, it's everything to do with when life has thrown so much shit at you that the bond that is between you is at or close to breaking point. Arguing, fighting, struggling to pull through together and stay together willingly and more than before separates those who really are in love and love each other from the rest. I thought I was, and a part of me still thinks I was, but... *shrug* (Yes, I am in denial, but piss off, the point still stands).

Normally, this would discount young couples because they don't get exposure to 'real' issues that would strain a relationship, so it's difficult to say most of the time because nothing tests that 'love'. So, based on the above, it's rare, but it does happen.
 

Hipsy_Gypsy

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I have to be honest, I was surprised to see that 18/19 year olds got roped into this too. In saying that, I agree with the following:

Berethond said:
Definitely. I've known enough 19-year-olds who've gotten married to believe it.
And I completely agree with:

TriGGeR_HaPPy said:
"Young Love" is, indeed, often just the hormones raging, and the want to be in a relationship so bad that you don't care who you're with, etc. etc.

But "Can young people actually be in love"? Hell yes they can. A lot of the time, young love is just the above, but that doesn't mean there aren't exceptions. E.g. one of my best female friends found her boyfriend when we were still in Year 10. Now they're 20 and ~22, still together, and are still one of the best couples I've ever seen.
Growing up, I wouldn't really have "gone out" with guys much. My mum would often have asked me why I didn't bring any boys home to which I'd just say I didn't like anybody. She called me an ice queen. Actually, she still does. I'm beginning to think it's true, haha. Then again, uh, Northern Ireland doesn't have any particularly attractive people, be it aesthetically, personality, intelligence or whatever else. Yeesh.

Mouse_Crouse said:
I would say it depends on your definition of 'love'. Most people see love as an emotion, a passive feeling, if you will. I view love as an act. Something you get up every morning and do. Now I might be bias, but I met my wife at 15 and we have been married for 8 years and have 6 children. It certainly seems like something must be working.

Having said all that, I will say, a serious relationship for 95% of people in that age group. Bad idea.
Definitely. Especially because they're going to be a lot more sensitive emotionally. Even if it is just puppy love.


Anyroad, all that being said, plenty of people who are well beyond their 20s, 30s, 40s don't give a toss about love or relationships. Just a good buck. :p Though, perhaps nowhere near to the same degree as adolescents. Then again, there are always the odd exceptions, huh.


x
 

David Armour

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That's not at all a weird conversation to have with your girlfriend. It would actually be a sign of maturity, being able to step back, analyze it, debate about it without the result being you two breaking up. But I think that there's a problem with your question. All you ask if it is possible. Now, if we're defining love (and there are many, many ways to define love) to be "be with one person, get married, and stay with that one person all your life" then we simply have to find a couple who has done that. Now, I haven't done the research but I think it's safe to assume yes, there has been at least one couple who have met when they were teenagers and stayed with each other for the rest of their lives. Now, if we were to look at it from a different perspective and ask "How many teenage relationships result in love," and I would have to say very minuscule. Even the ones that get married result in divorce. It's always better to wait to get married. Even as you get older, love is hard to come by. But, no, it's not impossible, no matter who or what their age is :)
 

SckizoBoy

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Hipsy_Gypsy said:
Growing up, I wouldn't really have "gone out" with guys much. My mum would often have asked me why I didn't bring any boys home to which I'd just say I didn't like anybody. She called me an ice queen. Actually, she still does. I'm beginning to think it's true, haha. Then again, uh, Northern Ireland doesn't have any particularly attractive people, be it aesthetically, personality, intelligence or whatever else. Yeesh.
... I checked and didn't realise NI's population was that low (2 million-ish). Easy solution: emigration!

Hipsy_Gypsy said:
Mouse_Crouse said:
Having said all that, I will say, a serious relationship for 95% of people in that age group. Bad idea.
Definitely. Especially because they're going to be a lot more sensitive emotionally. Even if it is just puppy love.
Normally, I'd agree with that, were it not for the word 'serious'. At that age, they don't really know the meaning of the word 'serious' in that context, because they have no concept of life responsibilities. I thought I was in a serious relationship, at least much more so than everyone else around me, largely because of the way we conducted ourselves. But it was only when we got a flat and lived together when 'serious' finally had meaning. As I mentioned above, the success of relationships is not based upon keeping one another happy, but upon recovering when neither are happy. That's when it's 'serious'. But that's just my view upon it and I know few people agree. *shrug*
 

Hipsy_Gypsy

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SckizoBoy said:
Hipsy_Gypsy said:
Growing up, I wouldn't really have "gone out" with guys much. My mum would often have asked me why I didn't bring any boys home to which I'd just say I didn't like anybody. She called me an ice queen. Actually, she still does. I'm beginning to think it's true, haha. Then again, uh, Northern Ireland doesn't have any particularly attractive people, be it aesthetically, personality, intelligence or whatever else. Yeesh.
... I checked and didn't realise NI's population was that low (2 million-ish). Easy solution: emigration!
Haha, yeah! I plan to! No wonder there are so little people here, mind you, with this whole casual attitude to bombs and all. Also there's a generally bad attitude towards each other. Honestly though, here they treat Catholocism and Luthereanism as gangs. It's ridiculous. Only a few people are sane enough to not actually give a toss.

Hipsy_Gypsy said:
Mouse_Crouse said:
Having said all that, I will say, a serious relationship for 95% of people in that age group. Bad idea.
Definitely. Especially because they're going to be a lot more sensitive emotionally. Even if it is just puppy love.
Normally, I'd agree with that, were it not for the word 'serious'. At that age, they don't really know the meaning of the word 'serious' in that context, because they have no concept of life responsibilities. I thought I was in a serious relationship, at least much more so than everyone else around me, largely because of the way we conducted ourselves. But it was only when we got a flat and lived together when 'serious' finally had meaning. As I mentioned above, the success of relationships is not based upon keeping one another happy, but upon recovering when neither are happy. That's when it's 'serious'. But that's just my view upon it and I know few people agree. *shrug*[/quote]

No, no - I see where you're coming from entirely. When you're young, the worst you have to worry about really is getting an essay done and good enough grades to get back into school to do your A Levels/get into Uni. But I definitely agree with you about the word serious actually becoming meaningful. Reltaionships aren't sunshine and butterflies all the time. In saying that, seeing some couples breaking up solely because they aren't happy (this could be phrased better) and blaming the relationship and ultimately breaking up doesn't particularly show that one or the other or both parties could actually handle a real relationship.

I hope that made sense? S:


x
 

Aprilgold

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Young love exists, sometimes its hormones raging, other times its not.
But teens, as far as I'm concerned, mentally *the AWAKE bit in their minds* are actually in love with a quality of the person *one, any quality, but means they can be a huge douche* while underneath it in their animal nature, their fooling themselves.
 

SckizoBoy

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Hipsy_Gypsy said:
No, no - I see where you're coming from entirely. When you're young, the worst you have to worry about really is getting an essay done and good enough grades to get back into school to do your A Levels/get into Uni. But I definitely agree with you about the word serios actually becoming meaningful. Reltaionships aren't sunshine and butterflies all the time. In saying that, seeing some couples breaking up solely because they aren't happy (this could be phrased better) and blaming the relationship and ultimately breaking up doesn't particularly show that one or the other or both parties could actually handle a real relationship.

I hope that made sense? S:

x
No, that made sense just fine (at least for me, anyway). And I keep having to think 'I'm not the exception to this... am I?' *sigh*

Still, what you mentioned can be applied quite broadly, though with increasing incidence regardless of age... and I think you made a point of it further back.
 

SeeIn2D

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UnknownGunslinger said:
SeeIn2D said:
Just curious what people on this site think of younger people who say they are in love. I don't just mean the "Goodnight I love you" thing, I mean two people being legitimately in love at a young age. I'm bringing this up because I called my girlfriend today and we were talking and we basically were talking about whether or not we are actually in love, or if it was just our young age making us think we are. (I know weird conversation to be having) But basically what we concluded that two younger people in their teens can actually be in love, just it was rarer because at that age most teenagers are driven by hormones and a want for sex.
So escapists, what do you think?
Click here: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-bits-advice-that-dont-make-sense-until-its-too-late/
Read number 5.
Come back to me :)

I'm not saying you're not in love, or you can't be in love because you're too young!
You and you alone know what you're actually feeling, and I've seen a lot of examples of high-school couples staying together for years, and genuinely being in love with each other.
But I've been in love at that age, and I know from experience it's mostly driven by the newness of things and them hormones :)
I actually read this article the other day lol. That what got me thinking about it.
 

Zac Smith

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Me and my (first) girlfriend got together when we were both 13/14 respectively, I'm now 19 and she is 20 in a few weeks and we are still together. Not "on / off" either, over 4 years solid
 

RanD00M

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They can but it is a rarity. Well true love at least, not that shallow teen stuff.
 

UnknownGunslinger

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SeeIn2D said:
I actually read this article the other day lol. That what got me thinking about it.
Brilliant, no wonder it reminded me of it :D
But seriously, my Aunt and her husband met when they were 12, and have been together for +40 years!
My mum and dad met in their early twenties but divorced few years ago.
There's no age gap that when crossed, you're in the "Able to be in love, this time for realsies zone" :p
In my view there's nothing preventing you to be in love as a teen.
It's just that much harder to asses it in truth, as everything you experience then is pretty new anyway.
As I said you and you alone know what you're feeling, though it's good to take those warnings into consideration as well :)
 

Ordinaryundone

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I'd actually say that yes, young people can be in love. Unfortunately, its the hot, hormonal, passionate kind of love. The kind that doesn't last very long and burns out very quickly. People don't become that infatuated with each other that quickly for nothing, but unfortunately most teenagers can only express themselves physically at that point, which is bad for a relationship. Its also incredibly mushy.
 

DexterNorgam

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Young love is a thing. Usually a messy, uninformed, inexperienced, doomed-to-inevitable-failure, thing, but a thing indeed.
 

2012 Wont Happen

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Definitely. The guitarist of my band and his girlfriend are a good example. Seventeen. Been together two years. Go great together. Care a hell of a lot about each other. And most importantly, they're there for each other.

Both of their houses just burned down. It's been hard on both of them, but them going through the situation together is making it so much easier for them.

Essentially when looking at them you see a perfect example of what a healthy relationship should be. No infatuation. No obsession. Absolute devotion. Absolute caring.